Summer On The Beach

Chapter 01

(Tim's Perspective)
       Seeing Kyle crying in the hall of the school after graduation was a little unnerving. He said, "I never even liked school," but that wasn't quite accurate. Kyle loved school; he just didn't like school work. He loved seeing his friends and acquaintances every day; he loved going out to lunch with all of us; and, most of all, he loved the fact that he was SGA president and that people paid attention to him.
       "Why aren't you running for president," he asked me a few weeks before the election of his successor.
       "That's not my style, Babe. You know that," I said.
       "I know, but I wish you'd do it, Tim. It's been wonderful," he said.
       "I know it has been for you, Babe, but I'm just not made that way. I'm content to be president of the Science Club," I said.
       "Well, that's an important job, and at least you'll be on ICC. That's what really runs the school. The Inter-Club Council. Not the SGA," he said.
       We went to the new house in Destin after graduation, and there was a large crowd there. It was mostly adults, except for our immediate family of brothers. I saw people handing Kyle envelopes all night long, and there was no telling what they were giving him. I had long since figured out that Kyle came from a background that was very different from the rest of us, but, since it didn't matter one bit to him, it didn't matter to me, either. I figured it was mostly money he was getting, and I also figured every dime of it would be spent on his brothers, in one way or another.
       The party lasted about three hours, and we were both very tired when it was finally over. His parents wanted to talk to us, though. Ed and Beth Foley were staying there, but they went to bed right after the party.
       "Son, your mother and I are both so proud of you and Tim that we're about to burst," Gene said.
       "Thanks, Daddy. I'm proud of y'all, too," he said.
       "I watched you tonight getting those envelopes. I figured it was anywhere from five dollars to five hundred dollars in each one, and you looked equally happy to get every one of them. That's the way it needed to be, son. I think your mama and I raised you right in that regard," he said.
       Kyle didn't know what to say. I had seen that, too. The only criteria you had to meet to be invited that night was that you knew Kyle or the Goodsons in some way, so there was a real cross section of people.
       "This has been a long day," Kyle said.
       "Yeah, I know. Y'all go on to bed. Are y'all going to Kevin and Rick's house first thing tomorrow morning?" Gene asked.
       "Yes, sir. We'll get over there sometime," Kyle said. "I don't exactly know when, though. It depends on how late we sleep."
       "Okay. Well, good night, boys," Gene said.
       Kyle and I got up to go to bed, and they stood up, too. They kissed us goodnight on our cheeks, and Kyle and I went off to our room. It had been a hectic week, and I was glad I was exempt from finals and didn't have to get up the next morning.
       * * *
       We woke up around ten o'clock, and we made love. We had been way too tired to do that the night before, and we both liked to start the day that way, anyhow.
       We went over to Kevin and Rick's house, and they were all still in the den. People had on clothes that morning, though, because Craig and Cherie were there. Craig wouldn't have cared if we all showed up naked, but the newer guys didn't know Cherie very well. They were self-conscious.
       "So, what's going on today?" Kyle asked.
       That was really the start of a very long weekend. Memorial Day was Monday, and the New Orleans folks would be leaving on Monday to get home. It was only Thursday morning, though, and we had time to kick back and play. Kyle's graduation party for our friends was going to be that night, and the ladies had plans to shop, go out to eat, and then go to a play that night. That meant it would only be guys at the party, so we could do all the nude swimming we wanted to do.
       Rick and Kevin had insisted on taking care of all of the arrangements for the party. Kyle didn't even know what they were serving, and it was killing him.
       "Are we having meat?" he asked that morning.
       "Well, of course we are," Rick said.
       "What kind?"
       "Wait and see. In fact, I want you out of here today, Kyle. Go play with Philip. You can come back at four, when everybody else gets here," Rick said.
       "You're kicking me out of the house?" Kyle asked.
       They were teasing, of course, but Rick meant it.
       "Kyle, I've been seeing stuff about Gulf World on TV. Would you take me there?" Craig asked.
       "Sure," Kyle said. "We can go to the water park, too, if you want to."
       "Is it full of ankle-biters?" Craig asked.
       "You can probably find somebody to bite anything you want bit, Bubba," Kyle said.
       We all laughed.
       "I think he got you last, Bubba," Kevin said.
       "No shit," Craig said.
       That made us laugh, too.
       Justin, Brian, and I were going to be helping Kevin and Rick get ready for the party. Denny and Ron were both supposed to be helping friends study for a big exam on Friday. They were both exempt, but their friends weren't. Jeff, Tyler, and Chuck were working. The older guys were playing golf with my Dad, and the ladies were getting ready to go out for the day and evening. That just left Craig and Kyle with no assignments but to stay away from the house.
       Cherie came into the room, all ready to go out. Sonya was picking her up, and they were going to Rita's house in Destin. From there, who knew.
       "So, how's the graduate this morning?" Cherie asked, giving Kyle a peck on the cheek.
       "I'm fine, thanks. How are you?" he said.
       All of a sudden she grimaced.
       "What's the matter?" Kyle said, all worried.
       "He just kicked the shit out of my bladder," Cherie said.
       "For real?" Kyle demanded.
       "Yeah. Put your hand right here, and you can feel it," she said, indicating a place on her stomach.
       "Oh, my God! It's alive!" Kyle said.
       We all chuckled.
       "This is unbelievable. This is the first time I ever did this. Feel it, Tim," Kyle said, all excited.
       I felt her stomach, and I felt the baby move. Everybody else in the room had to do the same thing. It was pretty amazing.
       "What did you say his name was?" Kyle asked.
       "I told you it's a secret," she said.
       "No. I mean, just now you said, 'so-and-so's kicking the shit out of my bladder.' I just didn't catch the name," Kyle said.
       "Okay. You win. It's . . . [long pause] none of your business," she said.
       "Damn, Aunt Cherie," Kyle said.
       "If you call me that again, I'm going to be kicking your bladder," Cherie said.
       "He likes to be called Uncle Craig," Kyle said. "Don't you, unky?"
       "I'll hold him, you kick him," Craig said. "Only aim a little lower than the bladder." We all laughed.
       Sonya showed up just then. She came right in. We hadn't been able to break my dad of always ringing the doorbell, but Sonya caught on right away that she didn't have to ring or knock at that house. She kissed Kyle and me on the cheek to tell us hello. She was all dressed up, and she was really pretty. I didn't have a real good mental picture of what my mom looked like, but I didn't remember her being as pretty as Sonya was.
       "Coffee, Sonya?" Kevin asked.
       "Thanks, but we need to get going. Rita and I have planned a very busy day," she said.
       Craig kissed Cherie, and the two ladies left.
       "All right, Kyle. It's time for you and your playmate to get going, too," Rick said.
       "Okay. I need to get my suit, though. Have you got yours?" he asked Craig.
       "I didn't bring one. I didn't think I'd need one here," Craig said.
       "That's okay. I've got plenty," Kyle said.
       Kyle never wore anything but Speedo briefs. He loved his tattoo of the monkey, and he showed it off every chance he got. He had a very nice bulge, too, and he liked to show that off, as well. He had a couple of pairs of trunks, but I was sure they weren't here. He had clothes here, at his parents' house, at the condo, and at my house, and I was positive the trunks were at his parents' house. He went upstairs and came down in a few minutes with a beach bag.
       "Do you want to see if Philip and Ryan want to go with us?" Kyle asked.
       "Sure," Craig said.
       Kyle called Philip, and, yes, they wanted to go. He and Ryan were planning to spend the weekend with some friends at a condo, and then they were going to Pensacola with us on Monday. They were going to go to the condo after the party that night.
       "Have fun, guys," Kevin said.
       "Thanks. We will," Kyle said, and he and Craig went off for a day together.
       "Do you think Craig can handle those three?" Rick asked.
       "If mischief is on the agenda, Babe, the question is whether those three can handle Craig," Kevin said.
       We all laughed, and then we got busy working on the party.

(Craig's Perspective)
       If there had been any way we could have, Cherie and I would have moved to Emerald Beach. I had always loved my brother, of course, and Cherie loved him, too. Now, she and I loved Rick as much as we loved Kevin, and we were both crazy about those kids. The problem was, both sets of our parents were in New Orleans, and there was no way in hell they'd ever move. Not only that, but we had a slew of friends in New Orleans, too, friends that went back for decades. We were only in our late twenties, but it was all the people we had known for a lifetime. And I'm not just talking about our contemporaries, either. Just as the Goodsons had very deep roots in Emerald Beach, the Foleys and Cherie's family had very deep roots in New Orleans.
       The drive to Emerald Beach was only about five-and-a-half or six hours, though, and we got over there as often as we possibly could. The baby might slow us down a little at first, but maybe not. I'd heard people say it's easier to travel with a baby than it is with a toddler. At least a baby couldn't ask, 'are we there yet?' and they didn't have to stop for potty breaks.
       I was so incredibly excited about becoming a father that I could hardly stand it. Cherie had taken extremely good care of herself during her pregnancy--our pregnancy--that I knew we had nothing to worry about. The fact of the matter was, though, the baby could come out deformed and crippled, and we'd still love it like it was the only baby on earth.
       Kevin and I looked a great deal alike, and people used to think we were twins, sometimes, when we were little. Naturally, we weren't identical, and we didn't look quite so much alike as adults, but the odds were very good that the baby would resemble me, if he resembled him. But who he looked like really didn't matter. I was getting me a little boy, and that was all I cared about.
       "I didn't eat any breakfast. I'm starving," Kyle said.
       "That sounds good. I didn't have anything, either," I said.
       He whipped out his cell phone and pressed a button.
       "Meet us at the Starfish," Kyle said. I figured he had called Philip. That was all he said. No "hello," no "goodbye."
       "You and Philip are pretty close, aren't you?" I asked. He was driving.
       "Oh, yeah. We've basically been like brothers for years. I feel about him like I do about Justin," he said.
       "It's good to have close friends, isn't it?"
       "What would you do without 'em?" he replied.
       The Starfish was a smallish motel, probably vintage 1970, and not much had been done to modernize it in the meantime. There was a door into the motel lobby and a separate door close to that into the restaurant.
       "Kyle, what are you doing here? I thought you would be off celebrating," a sixty-ish lady said when we went in.
       "I'm celebrating here. This is where I celebrate," he said.
       "Go on, boy. Don't try to fool me. I know you too well. But we're always glad to have you," she said.
       "They're giving a party for me tonight, and Kevin and Rick made me leave the house so I wouldn't try to boss it," he said. "Mom Sullivan, this is my uncle, Craig Foley. Kevin's brother."
       "How do you do, Craig. I'm Susan Sullivan, and Kyle and his crowd do us the honor of having lunch here every day. Welcome, and I hope you enjoy your lunch," she said. "Who else is coming?"
       "Just Philip and Ryan," Kyle said. "In fact, here they are, right now."
       "It's fried chicken day," Susan said, with a little smile.
       "You think I don't know that?" Kyle asked. "I just hope I can choke it down."
       "Get in there and eat, before I have to wear you out, you rascal," she said.
       "Hi, Mom," Philip and Ryan said in unison. I shook hands with Philip and Ryan.
       "Hi, boys. Did you have fun last night?"
       "Yes, ma'am," they said in unison again.
       "Good. Y'all know how we do things here. Make sure Craig gets enough to eat," she said.
       "Mom, he's going to put you and Pop out of business. You hide and watch," Kyle said.
       "If you boys haven't done that in all this time, I know he's not going to," she said.
       The boys all laughed.
       I could tell that lady genuinely loved those kids, and they genuinely loved her. I knew there were places like that in New Orleans, neighborhood places where they knew you by name. The closest thing to it that I was associated with was Chubby's Pool Hall in my parents' neighborhood. Kevin and I had both misspent much of our youth in there, and Chubby knew us and cared about us. This was the same sort of thing, without the pool tables.
       "How's it hanging, Philip?" I asked by way of greeting.
       "Very limp, as a matter of fact," Philip said.
       I laughed.
       "Do tell," Kyle said.
       "Shut up, Kyle," Ryan said.
       "That good, huh?" Kyle replied.
       "Let's just say we celebrated graduation," Philip said.
       Those three guys were as funny as any three guys I had ever been around. All three were smart as hell, but they all had this "I'm dumber than you, and I can prove it" mentality. Kevin had told me about that. Those boys were three Emerald Beach natives, and I knew their families had been there a long time. They exhibited Emerald Beach local culture in its purest form, and they were hilarious.
       "You crabbing this summer?" Philip asked Kyle, once we were seated.
       "Hell, yeah. They running? I'm crabbing," Kyle said.
       "I'm buying some off you this summer," Ryan said.
       "No, you're not. You'll be getting some off me this summer, but you ain't buying 'em," Kyle said.
       "We'll see, but I want me some crabs this summer, you hear me?"
       "Philip told me you already had the crabs," Kyle said.
       "I know. I do. That's cause I've been sleeping at a Goodson hotel," Ryan said.
       "We wash those sheets every month, Ryan. You know that," Kyle said.
       "Maybe it was from your house, then," Ryan said.
       "That's more like it. We're sanitary at the hotels. Gotta be."
       "Y'all still renting by the hour?" Ryan said.
       "Just to you. They know you can't get a date for the whole night," Kyle said.
       "Oh, he burned you bad, Baby," Philip said.
       "Thank you, Philip. I hadn't noticed that my right side was in flames," Ryan said.
       We all laughed.
       "Do you guys play 'got you last?' I asked.
       "Just with them. Ryan and I say 'burned you bad,'" Philip said.
       "It's the same thing, though, right?" I asked.
       "Yeah. I think Kevin taught them 'got you last,' but we've been doing it all our lives," Philip said.
       "I know," Kyle said.
       "I'm serious about those crabs, though, Kyle," Ryan said.
       "You'll get 'em, but you ain't buying 'em," Kyle said. "I ain't selling food to one of my best friends, Ryan."
       "Thank you, Kyle. How many have you been catching?"
       "A couple of hampers a week. Probably twenty dozen," Kyle said.
       "Big ones?" Ryan asked.
       "All sizes. I throw the little ones back, though, and only keep the big ones. Trixie goes crazy over those crabs. I suspect Krewe will, too," Kyle said. "We ain't had her out there yet with them 'cause she's still too young."
       "Those are some damn good dogs. My daddy has been talking about getting Brian to train our dogs," Ryan said.
       "He and Mr. Mack charge big for that," Kyle said.
       "I know, but I think he's fixing to call Mr. Mack. He's going to want Brian to train them for obedience. I know Mr. Mack trains them to hunt. We've got us three Springers. Three from the same litter, and they're about a year old," Ryan said.
       "Inside or outside dogs?" Kyle asked.
       "Oh, outside. Definitely. We've got that little Yorkie for an inside dog, and my mama would never let the Springers get with her. I think my mom loves that Yorkie better than she loves me. She's real protective of her," Ryan said.
       "I could see how anybody would love a dog more than they love you," Kyle said.
       "Burn, Baby," Philip said.
       "Yeah, I know," Ryan said.
       Those boys had an ease about them that was remarkable. There was absolutely nothing "gay" about them, except that they were gay. Three men came into the restaurant in tank tops, and all three were muscled and very good looking. I checked them out well, and the three gay guys at the table didn't do more than glance at them.
       "Did you guys see those boys who just came in?" I asked.
       "Yeah," they said, more or less in unison.
       "You didn't check them out," I said.
       "I looked to see if I knew them, and I didn't," Kyle said. "What else was I supposed to do?"
       "Craig, just because we're gay doesn't mean we want to jump the bones of every guy who walks into a place. I looked at them. They're cute, but I don't know 'em, either. What are you thinking, man?" Philip asked.
       "I'm thinking I'm learning that what being gay is all about is very different from what I thought it was," I said.
       "I'm ready for some of that banana pudding," Kyle said. "Craig, that stuff is awesome."
       * * *
       I was stuffed from lunch. The fried chicken was cooked perfectly, but they also had some beef stew that could hold its own in a beef stew cook-off. I ate way more of it than I should have, but I couldn't resist. The mashed potatoes were freshly made, and the vegetables all looked fresh, too. The banana pudding was some of the best of its kind that I had ever tasted.
       I noticed Kyle asked for half-and-half tea, and I wasn't really sure what that meant. Philip and Ryan got water with lemon, and I got the sweet tea. In New Orleans they always serve plain tea in restaurants, and I always put sugar in mine. I figured I'd just save myself a little work. After one taste, though, I almost gagged, it was so sweet.
       "What's the matter?" Kyle asked.
       "This is the sweetest tea I've ever tasted. It's like syrup," I said.
       "I know. They make it too sweet for me, too. That's why I get half-and-half," he said.
       "What's half-and-half?" I asked.
       "Half sweet and half unsweet. That's how I like it. Bev, bring him some half-and-half, please," he said to the waitress. She just smiled, but she had a new glass of tea at the table in a few seconds. It was much better.
       We had taken seats in a section of the restaurant that had ashtrays on the tables, and I lit up after I had finished eating. Philip and Ryan did, too.
       "If everybody's smoking, I am, too," Kyle said. "Gimme one, Philip." Kyle lit a cigarette. "I owe you a pack."
       "No, you don't," Philip said.
       "I bum 'em all the time, though," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, that's exactly the second cigarette you've bummed off me in the last month," Philip said.
       "Are you smoking at home?" Kyle asked.
       "Yeah. I have been, ever since Homecoming," he said. "My brothers both do, and my parents don't mind. Well, my mom ain't crazy about it, but she doesn't say anything."
       "How old are your brothers?" I asked. I had no idea he had siblings.
       "Twenty-two and twenty," he said. "I think I was supposed to be the girl, but it didn't work out."
       I chuckled. I had known many families with three children of the same sex, and I had often thought that was the case with them, too.
       "Well, almost," Kyle said.
       We all laughed.
       "Being gay ain't the same thing as being a girl, dumbass," Philip said.
       "Oh, really, Philip? I am so glad you told me that. Why, all this time I thought . . . "
       "Shut up, Kyle," Philip said, laughing. The rest of us laughed, too.
       After lunch we went to Gulf World. All four of us rode there in Kyle's car. He stopped at a convenience store and bought a pack of cigarettes for Philip and one for himself.
       "I haven't been to this place since we went in the sixth grade," Philip said. "Do y'all remember that?"
       "Yeah, I remember that. I haven't been there since then, either," Kyle said. "I think every six years is about right."
       "You see stuff about them on TV all the time," Philip said. "They're always catching whales and dolphins and shit."
       "Yeah. It's a national marine mammals rehabilitation facility. I mean, all that most local people know about is the shows and stuff, but there's a hell of a lot more to this place than just the shows," Ryan said. "My dad knows the people who run it. He writes their insurance, in fact."
       "I think they have a day camp during the summer for little kids," Kyle said. "Craig, y'all need to send the baby here when he's old enough for this. I knew some kids who went, and they had a great time. They started it the year I was too old to go to it, too. Wouldn't you know?"
       "They have all kinds of stuff for kids. A kid can spend the night here. They have an awesome laser show, and they go to that first. Then they spend the night with the animals," Ryan said. "They help feed 'em, make their food, watch 'em at night. They have a great time with that, too."
       "What kinds of animals do they have?" I asked.
       "Okay. The main shows are dolphins in the big pool and sea lions. They put it on big, too. Let me tell you," Ryan said. "Then they have the bird show, which is pretty incredible. Then they have the stingrays and turtles and sharks and shit like that. They let you pet those things, and they are amazing."
       "We see those all the time when we're surfing," Kyle said. "You'll be on your board, looking down, and right under you are gigantic stingrays and sharks. That makes you want to stay on your board, that's for sure."
       "You can see those things from your surfboard?" I asked. I was in awe.
       "Hell, yeah," Philip said. "You wouldn't believe the sea life you see when you're on a board waiting for a wave."
       "Aren't you scared?" I asked.
       "Not really. They don't come up all that often," Kyle said. "Every now and then a shark will bump into your board, but they're not out to eat you up. That's just their world. They just do what comes natural to them."
       "Do you ever see snakes in the water?" I asked.
       "Eels sometimes, but I haven't seen too many snakes," Kyle said.
       "We did one time, remember, Ryan? There was, like, a colony of water snakes. That was sort of scary," Philip said.
       "That gives me the creeps," Kyle said.
       "I know," Philip said.
       We paid our admission to the park, which wasn't very expensive, and we went to see the attractions. Cherie and I had been coming to Emerald Beach on a regular basis for several years, and I was sorry we hadn't discovered that place long before. The shows were funny, spectacular, and amazing. The grounds of the place were beautiful, and the whole thing was perfectly landscaped. It wasn't on the scale of Sea World in San Diego, which Cherie and I had visited once, but it was very much like that in concept.
       "That place was fabulous," I said. We were in a diner-coffee shop kind of place, getting a mid-afternoon snack. "Why haven't you taken us there before?"
       "To tell you the truth, I never think about coming here. I pass it all the time, but we never come. I don't think Tim and Justin and Brian have ever even been here, and I know Denny and Ron haven't been. We need to do some local attractions with those boys," Kyle said.
       "Have you ever been to ZooWorld?" Philip asked.
       "I've heard of it, but I've never been there," Kyle said.
       "Is that related to Gulf World?" I asked.
       "No, sir, it's a whole different thing," Philip said.
       I noted the "sir," but I didn't say anything about that. I knew they said "sir" to Kevin and Rick all the time because that was the way they had been raised, and, frankly, it was kind of nice.
       "It's a zoo and a botanical garden, all in one. Gulf World is sort of like a botanical garden, too, but ZooWorld is different. Gulf World saves mammals from the sea, but ZooWorld tends to specialize in breeding endangered species. They have something like fifteen endangered species they've been breeding. They have this special nursery where you can see the endangered babies they've bred," Philip said.
       "What kind of animals do they have?" I asked.
       "Lions, tigers, monkeys, alligators, camels, giraffes, snakes, exotic birds, orangutans, jaguars. You name it," Philip said.
       "Do y'all want to go see it?" I asked.
       "Not today. I had enough animals for one day. Plus, I want to go with Tim and the others. Next time, okay?" Kyle said.
       "Brian's going to shit his pants when he sees it. That boy's going to be a veterinarian, mark my words," Philip said.
       "He says not, Philip. He says he wants to be a human doctor," Kyle said.
       "He can't become a veterinarian at Tulane," I said. "He'd have to go to some place like LSU in Baton Rouge, to do that."
       "And see, he ain't doing that. That would mean Justin would have to move to Baton Rouge, too, and that's never going to happen," Kyle said. "Not with us in New Orleans. Besides, being a doctor for humans ain't all that bad, you know? At least they can talk to you and tell you what hurts."
       "Don't tell my mother that," I said.
       They laughed.
       "Yeah, I guess a lot of hers can't talk yet," Kyle said. "Is she going to be the baby's doctor?"
       "No. She won't do it," I said. "We've already talked about it."
       "Well, that sucks," Kyle said. "Although I don't think I'd want my grandma looking at my wee-wee, either."
       "Give her a magnifying glass, Kyle," Philip said.
       "Fuck you, Andrews. I'll measure up against you any day, boy," Kyle said.
       "I know. We've already done it, remember? More than once. I'm teasing you, asshole."
       "I know," Kyle said. "And I burned you bad on that one, too, son."
       We all laughed.
       The next stop was the water park, Ship Wreck Island. It looked huge from the entrance, and it was huge, once we were inside. It was a Thursday before school was out for the summer in most places, but there were quite a few people there.
       We went into the shower house/changing facility to get into our swim suits. I had seen those boys naked a bunch of times, so it was no big deal for them or me. We only rented one locker because that was really all we needed.
       I took off my clothes and put them in the locker. I was naked as a jaybird, and the boys were pulling up their suits.
       "Kyle, where's my suit?" I asked.
       "Oh, shit, Craig. I forgot to get you one, man. I'm so sorry," he said.
       "Cut the shit, Kyle. Give me the fucking suit," I said.
       "Craig, I don't have it."
       "Fine. Give me the key, and I'll go for a ride or something," I said.
       "Shit! Fuck! I locked the damn locker key in the locker. I put it in my pocket after I opened the locker, out of force of habit, and it's in my shorts," Philip said.
       "Yeah, and my car keys are locked in there with it," Kyle said.
       I knew this was some kind of joke, but they were so serious. How could it be a joke?
       "You guys are very good actors. Give me the fucking suit," I said. I was pissed, and I knew it showed in my voice. And, of course, I was standing there stark naked.
       "Get it out of the locker," Ryan said. "It ain't locked."
       I tried the handle, and it opened. Shit, I thought. They have gotten me last. Goddamn it!
       "Is there anything you'd like to say?" Kyle asked.
       He said that so innocently that I just had to laugh.
       "Yeah, you got me last," I said.
       "We thought so," Ryan said.
       We all laughed at that.
       But the last laugh was on me, too. The swim suit Kyle had brought for me was a white Speedo brief. He was wearing a bright red one, and I thought I had seen postage stamps that were larger than his. Mine, at least, was bigger, but the color left nothing to the imagination.
       "That right there looks good," Kyle said. He reached out his hand toward my crotch.
       "Don't you touch me, Kyle," I said.
       "What's the matter? Are you're afraid you'll bone up?" Kyle asked.
       I was speechless. That was exactly what I was afraid of, and I knew he knew it.
       "You're not that much different than us, are you?"
       "No, I'm not. I've never not admitted that, Kyle. You know that," I said.
       "I know. I just wish more straight boys could admit that, Craig. I think the world would be a better place, if they did," he said.
       "You got that right, Bubba."
       That park was incredible. They had several levels of rides. The first ones we went to were the Thrill Rides: Tree Top Drop, Raging Rapids, and Pirate's Plunge. They were extremely high, and the rush going down took my breath away.
       "These are the ones I like," Kyle said.
       We did the trio a second time. The lines were very small, which I attributed to the day of the week and the time of year. The second go wasn't quite as exciting, although Kyle, Philip, and Ryan did them head first instead of feet first. That probably added to the excitement. I did the third one that way, and it was much scarier and much more of a rush than feet-first had been.
       We did White Knuckle River, the Zoom Flume, and the Great Shipwreck, and those were almost as good as the Thrill Rides. They were supposed to be "family rides," but they were pretty intense. We didn't do any of the other family rides or the kid things, though.
       "What time is it?" Kyle asked.
       "It's 3:30. What the hell do you care?" Philip said.
       "What do I care? My party starts at four, that's what I care. I've got to be home in thirty minutes. Let's go."
       "Shit," Philip said.
       We hustled our asses back to the changing room, and we got back into our clothes.
       "What's this all about?" Philip asked. He was rubbing Kyle's cheek.
       "Get off of me, Philip," Kyle said adamantly.
       "You didn't shave this morning, did you?"
       "No. Shit! I forgot. That's just too damn bad, though. I gotta be there when they start coming," he said.
       "I know. You ain't going to have time to shave. It don't look that bad. Really, Kyle," Philip said.
       "Look bad or not, that's the way it's going to be," Kyle said.
       "I think it looks good, Kyle. Very manly," Ryan said.
       I agreed with Ryan. Kyle's beard was pitch black, and it was thick and heavy. It didn't matter how closely he shaved, you could always see it. He had quite a bit of hair on his chest, too.
       We took very quick showers at the water park, and we were on our way.
       "Drop us off so we can get my car," Philip said.
       Kyle swung by the Starfish to drop them off.
       "Kyle, this has been a great day," I said.
       "I know. Those guys are fun, aren't they?"
       "All of you are fun," I said. "Thanks, man."

Chapter 02

(Jeff's Perspective)
       I first got interested in blogging when I was still at the University of Florida before Clay died. I had gone to a workshop given by the GLBT Student Union on gay resources on the Internet, and one of the sessions was on blogs and blogging. It isn't a "gay thing" necessarily, but a number of bloggers are gay men. It was just one more way to help create a gay community on the Web.
       I kept my blog intermittently before I moved to Emerald Beach. During some periods, I wrote every day, even several times a day. At other times, I'd go two or three weeks without posting an entry. After Clay died, I was in no condition to write. When I moved into Kevin and Rick's house, though, the urge returned.
       "Do you guys know what a blog is?" I asked Kevin and Rick one day.
       "No. What is it?" Rick asked.
       "The word 'blog' is short for Weblog, and a Weblog is a kind of journal that a person would write on the Web. It's just kind of a day-to-day record of what happens to you and to the people around you," I said. "They usually have lots of links to news and other blogs and interesting stuff."
       "Who reads them?" Kevin asked.
       "Just anybody who wants to. Some are pretty fascinating, and you really get to know the writer well," I said.
       "I'll have to check that out," Kevin said.
       "The reason I asked you about it is I've kept one off and on for over a year," I said. "I'd like to start back."
       "Cool," Rick said.
       "Would you mind if I did that?" I asked. "I'd be writing a good bit about this family."
       They both kind of shrugged.
       "This is a pretty amazing group of people, you know? I'd like to tell the world about us," I said.
       "Would you use real names?" Rick asked.
       "Well, not last names, but yeah, if that's all right. Real first names," I said. "You guys would be 'out' to the world."
       "Can you take it down any time you want to?" Kevin asked.
       "Oh, sure," I said.
       "Do a few and let us see them," Rick said.
       I got back into the blog business that night. I still had my site up and running, so I wrote the history of my transition from being Clay's partner to being single again and in Emerald Beach. That took me several entries to complete, and then I just started talking about the day-to-day events of our lives. When Kevin and Rick looked at it, they said they didn't think it would hurt for me to continue to use real first names and real places. They actually complimented my writing skills, and that made me pretty proud.
       The first payoff of that was those boys from Kentucky that we met when they were here for Spring Break. Shortly after that, though, something pretty wonderful and amazing happened.
       I had a place for comments on each entry, of course, just like every other blogger has, and I got a comment from a guy named Josh. He included his email address, so I wrote to him.

       Hi, Josh,
               Thanks for the nice comment, man. It is really great living in a totally gay family, especially since my own family has basically disowned me because I'm gay. If you've read my blog for a while, you know that my first partner died awhile back, and these guys have healed me of the depression I suffered after his death. I won't ever be able to get him back, of course, but at least now I belong somewhere. And I've got another serious boyfriend, too, and he and I are very much in love.
                                                                           Jeff

       A couple of days later he wrote back to me.

       Hi, Jeff,
               It looks like we have at least three things in common: one, my last name is 'Martin,' too. Two, I'm also from Florida--Ft. Lauderdale. Three, my family disowned me, also. Not only that, but I have a brother named Jeff. He's straight, though. Those are really some coincidences, don't you think? Take care.
                                                   Josh

       When I read that, I gasped for breath. I couldn't believe it. It was absolutely uncanny. I thought I had found my brother.

       Dear Josh,
               I almost fell off my chair when I read your email just now. My parents are Fred and Linda Martin. They live at 4573 Balboa Dr., Ft. Lauderdale, FL. I have a gay brother named Josh Martin, and I think you're him. If you are my brother, call me at 945-555-6969. That's my cell phone. Please be my brother! Please!
                                                   Love, Jeff

       "Hi, Babe. What's going on?" Tyler asked. He had just come home from work. It was a Friday afternoon in mid-May.
       "I think I just found my brother," I said.
       "What?"
       "A guy named Josh Martin, who is from Ft. Lauderdale and whose parents disowned him and who has a brother named Jeff, commented on my blog. I wrote back to him. Here, read these," I said.
       He read the emails.
       "This is unbelievable," Ty said. "Oh, dear God, please let it be our Josh."
       I half expected the phone to ring immediately, but it didn't. I kept my cell phone on me, though, so I'd get his call when it came. The phone rang.
       "Hello," I said, almost shouting. I was a little breathless.
       "Hey, what's up?" It was Kyle.
       "Oh, it's you," I said.
       "Yeah, it's me. What's wrong with you? Why are you talking so loud?" he asked.
       "Sorry, Bubba," I said.
       "That's okay. Are y'all coming over tonight? I'm about to order pizza, and I want to make sure we get enough for you and Ty, if you are," he said.
       "Yeah, we'll be there in a few minutes," I said.
       "Okay. We'll see you then," he said, and he hung up.
       I printed out the email exchange between me and Josh to take with us to Kevin and Rick's house. I was so nervous and excited that I was trembling. I couldn't believe what was going on, but deep inside I knew I had found my brother.
       After we got to Kevin and Rick's, we helped ourselves to pizza.
       "Jeff, what's the matter, Bubba?" Kevin asked. "You seem upset."
       "I'm not upset, Kevin. I think I found my brother," I said.
       I told them the story of what had happened, and then I let all of them read the four emails.
       "I've heard of stuff like this happening before," Tim said. "Jeff, tell us what happened to your brother. I never did get the story on that."
       They all wanted to know what had happened.
       "When I was in the ninth grade and my brother was in the eleventh grade, my parents found out he was gay. Is gay. He had a boyfriend, and the boyfriend told his parents about them. The other guy's parents were furious, and they thought Josh had made their son turn gay. They came over to our house and confronted my parents about it.
       "It didn't go well. My dad got furious after they left, and he demanded that my brother tell him the truth. My brother was angry, too, so he did. He came out to them right in front of me. I'll never forget that night. I had never seen my parents fight, but they did that night. Argue, really, not physical fighting. They never did that. They screamed at each other, and my dad screamed at Josh. He told Josh he was never to see Emmett again--Emmett was the boyfriend--and Josh bowed up and said my dad couldn't stop them from seeing each other. It was a really ugly scene.
       "Nobody spoke in the house for over a week after that. My dad was totally contemptuous of Josh and wouldn't even look at him. Josh was angry constantly. When I tried to talk to him and tell him I loved him, he pushed me away. My mom was a basket case and cried a lot of the time. It was terrible.
       "We had moved to Lauderdale from New Jersey because of my dad's job. Our grandparents and two of my dad's sisters still lived in New Jersey, and he made arrangements for Josh to go live with them. Our two aunts weren't married, and they still lived with our grandparents. My parents bought him a plane ticket and called a cab to take him to the airport. They really didn't even say goodbye.
       "I wasn't allowed to call Josh or to write to him. It was as though he stopped existing, as far as my parents were concerned. At first, my mom cried all the time, but, eventually, she got used to the idea, I guess. I heard them arguing about it several times, but my dad remained adamant. Josh could never come home, and I was to have no contact with him at all.
       "After a while, things got back to normal at home. My mom perked up, and she didn't cry anymore. Gradually, we started leading our lives as though Joshua Frederick Martin didn't exist. I didn't have a brother anymore. I was an only child."
       "How long ago was that, Jeff?" Kevin asked.
       "Eight years, more or less. I'm twenty-two now, and I was fourteen when it happened," I said.
       "Were you guys close?" Kyle asked.
       "Not as close as you and Clay were, that's for sure," I said. "But I looked up to him and loved him."
       "I sometimes wonder how close Clay and I really were," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, Clay was devastated when you got so upset because he hadn't told you he was gay. He and I had several long talks about the fact that he felt as though he had betrayed you over that. I know you guys made it okay that night at Kevin and Rick's house, but I'm so sorry he didn't have more time to let you know how he felt about you, Bubba," I said. "He loved you, Kyle. I think he loved you as much as he loved me."
       Kyle started crying, and he excused himself. Tim went off with him.
       "Kyle needed to hear that, Jeff," Kevin said. "Thank you."
       "Have you ever tried to get in touch with Josh?" Brian asked.
       "Once since I've been here. Do you remember the night we went out to eat at the fancy restaurant in New Orleans, and we stopped at a drugstore to get me some medicine?" I asked.
       The ones who had been there said they did.
       "When we got home to Beth and Ed's house, Beth took me into the kitchen to talk. I called my mom that night to see if she knew how to get in touch with Josh. She and I spent most of the time on the phone crying, but she gave me a number. I tried it, but it had been disconnected," I said.
       "Do you know where this Josh you've been writing to lives?" Brian asked.
       "No, I don't," I said.
       "Let me see those emails," Brian said.
       He got up and went into the study. We all sort of looked at each other, wondering what he was up to. Trixie and Krewe followed him, of course.
       He was back in a few minutes.
       "Jeff, come here," Brian said.
       "What is it?" I asked.
       "The guy you've been writing to lives in Bloomington, Indiana. I got the homepage of his ISP, and he has a personal Web site. Come and see these pictures," Brian said.
       Everybody in that room was on their feet in an instant, and we charged into the study. There on the monitor was a picture of my brother and another guy. The caption said, "Me and My Sweetie."
       "That's him," I shouted. "That's my brother!"
       I clicked around, and there were a bunch more pictures of him. There was even a picture of him and me that had been taken when he was about twelve and I was about ten. Tears were flooding down my face.
       "He's a good looking guy, and so is his boyfriend," Rick said.
       The site hadn't been updated in over a year, so I wondered if they were still even together.
       "He has a blog, too," I said. "No wonder he found mine. We belong to several of the same Web Rings for bloggers."
       Kyle and Tim came in just then.
       "Kyle, it's really my brother," I said. "This is a picture of him."
       "Cool. Which one?"
       "The one on the left," I said.
       "He looks a lot like you, Bubba. I'm so excited for you. Let's call him," he said.
       "I wish I could. I don't know his number, though," I said.
       "Did you try information? You know where he lives, don't you?" Kyle said.
       "Yeah! Now I do, thanks to Brian."
       I whipped out my cell phone and dialed long distance information. I asked for his number. The recording told me what it was, and I wrote it down.
       "How lucky is that?" Ty asked. "I almost never get real numbers from information."
       "I know," I said. "Should I call the number?"
       "Of course, call the number," Kevin said. "Do you want us to leave?"
       "No! I want all of you here," I said.
       I dialed the number, and a guy answered on the third ring.
       "Hello," he said. It wasn't Josh, so I figured it was his boyfriend.
       "Hello. May I speak with Josh Martin, please."
       "Look, we're not supposed to get junk phone calls. Who are you? I'm reporting you to the Indiana Attorney General. We pay for junk-call protection, and you're in trouble, mister," he said.
       "This isn't a junk call. I'm Josh's brother," I said.
       "Jeff? Is this Jeff?"
       "Yeah," I said.
       "Oh, let me get him. Josh," he screamed. There was excitement in his voice. "It's your brother, Baby."
       "What?" I heard Josh say.
       "It's Jeff," the guy said. He was obviously excited.
       "Hello," Josh said. I would recognize that voice anywhere.
       "Josh, it's me. Jeff," I said.
       There was a very long pause.
       "Are you there?" I asked.
       "Yeah, I'm here. I'm a little overwhelmed right now, is all," he said.
       "Me, too. Did you get my email? The one I sent today?"
       "No. I haven't checked yet tonight. I can't believe this," he said.
       "Believe it, brother. It's really me," I said.
       We both got pretty emotional. I was crying, and I thought Josh was, too. It was like an answer to my prayers.
       The guys started leaving one by one to give me privacy. Josh and I had eight years to catch up on, and we had a lot of unresolved feelings about our parents to explore. After about forty-five minutes, the battery in my cell phone crapped out, so I called him on the house phone. We ended up talking for over two hours, and we had just begun to scratch the surface.

(Kevin's Perspective)
       Just when I thought we had everything sorted out, Jeff discovered his brother. Rick and I were elated that the two of them had made contact, and we knew that Josh, and his partner, Patrick, would become members of our family, too.
       "I feel a need to get some focus on what we're doing," Rick said one day.
       "What do you mean, Babe?" I asked.
       "I don't know. I mean, we've got all these guys we're sort of responsible for, you know? Ron's going to be out of here in a couple of weeks, but we still have Brian and Denny. We're their foster parents. But we've got the older guys, too. You and I are twenty-seven. How can we be the parents of eighteen-year-olds? Justin and Kyle? And, for that matter, of Jeff and Tyler and Chuck at twenty-two, and of Josh and Patrick at twenty-four?"
       "This thing has gotten out of hand, hasn't it?" I said.
       "No, it hasn't. I just need some guidance about how we're supposed to treat them," he said. "These are real human beings, Kevin. Are we giving them what they need? Or are we fucking them up?"
       "Where do we turn for help?" I asked.
       "I don't know. Are we giving them what they need?" he asked.
       "This is bothering you, isn't it?" I said.
       "Look at how many see us as their parents. I mean, I know Kyle and Tim have parents, but their parents trust us a whole lot. They expect us to be parents to those two. The rest of them don't really have parents besides us: Justin, Brian, Denny, Ron. Jeff thinks of us as parents, and so does Ty. Chuck, too. Shit, Chuck is close to being the most needy of all of them right now. And what about Chip and Brady?" Rick asked.
       "I don't think Chip really thinks of us as parents," I said.
       "No, you're probably right. Not him. But all the rest of them do," Rick said.
       I thought for a moment.
       "Do you think we need to get some help?" I asked.
       "Yes, I do, Kevin. I need help, even if you don't. But where do I get it?" I asked.
       "Let's try Tyrone Williams," I said.
       "Good idea."
       I called Tyrone the next day and told him what we needed and wanted. He was eager to help, but he wanted to come out to see us, rather than have us go see him.
       "I'm in a cubicle, and you can't have a private conversation in this place," he had said. "I'll be at your office at eleven o'clock."
       "So, what's up?" he asked, after we were settled in my office to talk.
       I explained our concerns, with several elaborations from Rick. Tyrone thought for several minutes before he responded.
       "The thing is, guys, y'all are doing a service that you would not believe," he said.
       "What do you mean?" Rick asked.
       "Well, Rick, look at your population. First of all, they're adolescents. Everybody wants three-year-olds. They don't want thirteen-year-olds. That's the bottom line. Second, most foster families think of foster care as an income supplement. Most of our foster parents are low income, and they need the money those kids bring in. The ones who don't want the extra income are doing it for religious reasons, so they can convert the kids to whatever holy-roller church they belong to. And they can usually use the extra income, too. Third, you guys are dealing with gay kids. And they're not just random gay kids. Most of them are in foster care because they are gay. I've told you guys over and over again how lucky I am to have a family like yours to place gay kids in, and I've meant that every time I've said it. Y'all are doing a fantastic job with those kids. What's the problem?" he asked.
       "When you say it like that, I guess there really isn't a problem. I've just felt that we've turned over so many of our parenting responsibilities to the older boys. You know who Kyle Goodson is. He just seems to take over, Tyrone. His personality is so incredibly strong that he just seems to take over," Rick said.
       "Has he done anything important that you disagree with?" Tyrone asked.
       "No, not at all," Rick said.
       "Then all I can say is, so what, Rick?"
       "But a lot of times, Kyle steps in before we can, and the boys listen to him," Rick said.
       "And why is this a problem?" Tyrone asked. "Unless he's leading them astray."
       "Well, it's not, but . . . "
       "Listen here, guys. You are both only twenty-seven years old. In the natural order of things, you would never be the parents of fourteen- and fifteen- and sixteen-year-old boys. I know you have responsible jobs and all of that, and I know you're both very mature. But there are a lot of people here in Emerald Beach who would think of you both as boys yourselves, because of your age," he said. "I see you both more as older brothers than as parents to these guys."
       "That's the way we've approached it, Tyrone. We didn't really know how to be parents when we got Tim. He was so easy, and all the other boys have been easy, too. But I think we're both feeling that we aren't giving them what they need," I said.
       "That Justin Davis wouldn't have been easy anywhere but here," he said.
       "Yeah, but he was easy here. Mainly because of Kyle and Tim," I said.
       "Are these boys happy?" he asked.
       "Yes," Rick said. "They're very happy."
       "Are these boys getting into trouble at school or in the community?"
       "No, you know they're not," I said.
       "Are these boys doing well in school?" Tyrone asked.
       "Yeah, they're doing very well. Brian was in the State Science Fair, and he's going to the International Fair in Houston later this summer," Rick said. "Denny's on the debate team, and he's working on the school literary magazine. He even won a writing contest."
       "Have you ever heard the expression, 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'?"
       "You think that's what's going on here?" Rick asked.
       "No, Rick. I don't think that. I know that's what's going on here. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, and this home ain't broke, boys," Tyrone said.
       "So, you think we're doing okay?" Rick asked.
       "Kevin, would you take him out there and kick his ass for me, for not listening?" Tyrone said.
       We all laughed.
       "I'm just trying to do the right thing by the kids," Rick said.
       "If you don't shut up, I'm putting your ass in foster care, with Kyle in charge," Tyrone said.
       Rick and I both laughed hard.
       "We call Kyle 'Little Rick' sometimes, Tyrone," I said.
       "Oh, so that would be a fitting punishment for him, right?" Tyrone asked.
       We all laughed again.
       "Tyrone, it's time for lunch. Will you have lunch with us?" I asked.
       "Yes, I will, as your guest, for dragging my ass west of that damn bridge just to tell y'all that y'all are doing a good job," Tyrone said.
       We all laughed.

(Tyler's Perspective)
       My enlistment in the Coast Guard was up on 31 May, but I had enough leave to be out of there on 30 April. The first session of summer school started at ECCC on 5 May, and I registered for two courses for that session. I really just needed the two sessions of summer school to get my AA degree. I had done a full year in Minnesota, and I had taken courses all along since I was in Emerald Beach, so I was in good shape. I would be able to start at the local campus of FSU in the fall.
       I had never been happier in my life than I was right then. Jeff and I were totally in love with each other, and we both knew it was forever between us. Accepting the fact that I was gay hadn't been easy for me, and I had wrestled with it for a long time. Since I was about thirteen, in fact. Once I met him, though, I was happy I was gay. I couldn't imagine my life without Jeff.
       "Josh and Patrick want to come visit this summer," Jeff said.
       "Cool," I said.
       I knew Jeff was eager to see Josh again, and I was eager to meet him, too. Patrick was kind of a wildcard, but he was obviously somebody we had to care about, since Josh did.
       "You're scared of meeting Josh, aren't you?" Jeff asked me.
       "No, I'm not scared. Why would I be scared?" I asked.
       He laughed.
       "It's okay to be scared. Don't you think I was scared about meeting your parents? And your brother?" Jeff said.
       "I didn't think about that," I said. "I guess you must have been."
       "I was, but that's okay that you didn't think of it. It all worked out great, and this is all going to work out great, too," I said. "It's not just going to be us. It's going to be the whole damn family Josh is meeting. Those guys love you, Ty. If anybody should be sweating their balls over their visit, it should be Josh and Patrick. They're coming into a big-ass, very-well-connected family, man. I forbid you to be scared."
       I laughed.
       "Thanks, Kyle," I said.
       "That did sound a lot like him, didn't it?" he said.
       "Yeah, it did," I said. "He's amazing, isn't he?"
       Jeff was quiet for a few moments.
       "You know Kyle saved my life, don't you?"
       Then it was my turn to be quiet. I knew Jeff thought Kyle had saved him, and I knew he loved Kyle as much as he loved anybody, maybe even me.
       "He's a remarkable guy, Ty. And I love him very, very much," Jeff said.

(Kyle's Perspective)
       My graduation week was unbelievable. I had so much fun.
       Thursday, Craig and I, plus Philip and Ryan, got to spend almost the whole day together. We went to Gulf World, which was great, but then we went to Ship Wreck Island. We had a wonderful time on all those water "rides." They weren't really rides. They were more like slides and stuff like that, and I had a blast. Me and Philip and Ryan had been there a bunch of times, but that was a first for Craig.
       "I can't believe you put me in this little white Speedo," Craig said.
       "Do you want to wear mine? I'll swap with you," I said.
       "Shit, no. That one is even smaller than mine," he said.
       "What the hell are you whining about? You're a grower, anyway, man. Nobody is going to notice you," I said.
       He wasn't really a grower. He was a shower, and you could see the outline of that dick and those balls very plainly through that suit. I had given him a white one on purpose for just such as that.
       "Kyle, I feel like I'm naked," he said.
       "But you ain't, Bubba. Grow up," I said.
       "Fuck it," he finally said. "I guess this will have to do."
       That night my brothers gave me a party. It was the usual crowd, plus my dad, Tim's dad, Grandpa, and Craig, and we had a good time.
       My parents had told me several weeks before graduation they wanted to get me something real nice as a graduation present, but I really didn't need anything or want anything.
       "What about a new car?" my dad had asked.
       That sort of perked me up.
       "Like what?" I asked.
       "Well, everybody seems to like those SUV's. A man showed me his new Toyota Sienna the other day, and that was a fine looking piece of machinery," he said. "Hell, son, I wouldn't mind having one of those for myself."
       "Would it be a lease?" I asked.
       "Yeah. Or would you rather have a Jeep? I know how much you love Tim's," he said.
       "I do love his, but I drive it often enough to satisfy that need," I said. "It really ain't all that practical for hauling folks, you know?"
       "That Sienna seats seven. That's two more than your Mazda. You could also haul quite a bit of junk with the two banks of back seats folded down. I'll tell you, Kyle, I'm not a car expert, by any means, but that thing really looked nice to me the other day. Why don't you get some of your boys to go look at one and see if you like it," he said.
       Tim, Justin, Brian, and I went to look at a Sienna, and it was as cool as my dad had said it was. But cool to him wasn't necessarily cool to me. It didn't come with four-wheel drive, for one thing, and it looked more like a van than an SUV. The man showed us a Land Cruiser, though, and that's what I decided I wanted.
       "Look at the sticker price on this mother," Jus said.
       "Yeah, but boys, nobody pays the sticker price," the salesman said. "Who's this going to be for?"
       "For me, if I get it," I said. "It's going to be a graduation present from my parents."
       "What did you say your name was?" he asked.
       "Kyle. Kyle Goodson," I said.
       "Any relation to Gene Goodson?" he asked.
       "Yes, sir. He's my daddy," I said.
       "I see," the man said.
       "Do you know him?" I asked.
       "Not personally, but I certainly know who he is," he said.
       "Can you get this on a lease? That's the only way he gets cars. Through his business," I said.
       "Sure you can," he said. "How many cars does your daddy lease, Carl?"
       "Kyle, not Carl," I said. "Tell you the truth, I don't really know, but it's quite a few."
       "Oh, sorry. Kyle, I meant. Has he ever leased Toyotas before?" he asked.
       "No, sir. I think this would be the first one. You never can tell, though. This might start a new trend," I said.
       Kevin always said our family has more resources than most families and we ought to use them when we can. If that guy thought my daddy's business might want to get into a Toyota fleet, he just might be able to sharpen his pencil a little more than usual.
       "We'd sure be happy to do business with him," he said.
       I took the Land Cruiser for a test drive, and that thing was a dream. It had more gimmicks and gadgets in it than a Leer jet, and the stereo was out of this world. There were eight speakers. We all took turns driving it, too, and every one of them said the same thing about how good it handled.
       All four of us drove to Destin after we turned it in to talk to my dad.
       "Daddy, that Sienna was real nice, but it's more of a van than an SUV, don't you think?" I said.
       "You didn't like the shape of it?" he asked.
       "I don't want you to think I'm ungrateful, Daddy, because it's a beautiful vehicle. You can't get it with four-wheel drive, though, and we're going to need that, especially when we go up to North Carolina," I said.
       "I didn't know that. I agree about wanting four-wheel drive, though," he said. "Did you see anything else you liked?"
       "Yes, sir. I saw a Land Cruiser, and, Daddy, it's a real honey. But you know what, Daddy? The bottom line is, I don't really need a new car," I said.
       "I know you don't, son, but your mama and I want to do something special for you. Let us spoil you a little, son, okay?" he said.
       "I'll let you spoil me," Justin said.
       We all laughed.
       "Brian, how do you put up with him?" Dad asked.
       "Mostly I ignore him," Brian said.
       We chuckled.
       "By the way, son. Mack Mixon thinks you invented dog training. He told me he thought it was a waste of your time to go to college and medical school," he said.
       We all laughed, and Brian damn sure blushed.
       "Let me ride over there and look at it," Daddy said. "What's the sticker on this thing, anyway?"
       I told him, and he whistled softly.
       "That's what we pay for your mama's cars, Kyle," he said.
       "Daddy, if that's too much, I understand, and like I said before, I don't really need a new car. Mine's got, like, 40,000 miles on it, and it'll be good for a long time to come," I said.
       "Yeah, but you're getting a new car, and that really ain't too much. Besides, I think I can talk to the man. Who knows? If this works out, I might just switch to Toyotas for all the cars we lease," he said.
       I grinned. That's exactly what I thought.
       "Daddy, one thing I've been thinking about," I said.
       "What?"
       "I know you'll want to trade my car, but do you think there's any way I could keep it for the summer?" I asked.
       "No, we want this to be your graduation present, Kyle. It won't seem like that if you wait till September to get it," he said.
       "No, sir. That's not what I mean. I mean, go ahead and get the new one, but keep the old one, too," I said.
       "What do you need two cars for?" he asked. "Y'all got Justin's truck. I mean, I have a car and a truck, but y'all got that covered."
       "Yes, sir, I know, but we're probably going to have some boys staying with Kevin and Rick this summer. Just for the summer. They're going to need transportation," I said.
       "Like who?"
       "Like Tim's cousin Paddy, for one. You met him. The guy from Boston? He's coming for the summer, Daddy. And different ones will be in and out. Most of them will have transportation, but Chris and David won't. And Paddy won't. We're going to need an extra car. I'm telling you," I said.
       "Now you're asking me to spoil you, Kyle," he said. He was smiling, though.
       "Yeah, I reckon I am, but . . .," I said.
       "Hell, it's only money. You can keep it for the summer, but not after they all go home, you hear?" he said.
       "Yes, sir. Thank you, Daddy. You won't be sorry."
       "Kyle, boy, you got balls the size of watermelons," Justin said, once we were in the car on the way home.
       "What are you talking about?" I demanded.
       "You know exactly what I'm talking about. Getting him to let you keep this car on top of a new one. I ain't believing it," he said.
       "I'm glad you thought of that, Kyle," Tim said. "We are going to need extra cars this summer."
       "I know. That's why I did it," I said. "Who all's coming this summer, anyway?"
       "Paddy's going to be here the whole summer, just like you said," Tim said. "Are Chris and David coming?"
       "Yeah, but just for two weeks, I think. Chris wants to spend the whole summer here, but he's got a girlfriend and all, you know? Plus, he can't lay off therapy for that long. Yet, anyhow. He'll get to that point someday, though," I said.
       "Can he drive?" Brian asked.
       "Hell, yeah, he drives. He doesn't have a car yet, but he's saving for one," I said. "I think he's going to get it for Christmas. He thinks his parents will spring for half of it, if he saves up the other half."
       "Is he working?" Brian asked.
       "Yeah, he's working, Bri. Or will be this summer, anyway. He's going to be a physical therapy aide or something. He just found out about that. Don't you guys write to each other?" I asked.
       "Yeah, but not every week or anything," Bri said. "When are they coming?"
       "They want to be here for Justin's birthday, so the last week of June and the first week of July. They have to go see Chris's grandparents when they leave here," I said.
       "Cool," Bri said.
       "Who else is coming?" Tim asked.
       "Seth and Curt are, but just for a long weekend," I said. "Fourth of July, too."
       "So, what are we going to do about the baby?" Jus asked.
       "What do you mean, do about the baby?" I asked.
       "Well, ain't we going there when he's born?" he asked.
       "I'd like to," I said.
       "Kyle, my dad and Sonya and I were talking about that. They think we should give them a couple of weeks before we charge over there," Tim said. "They said they think they need to get used to having him and get settled down a little bit before we go."
       "Yeah, I guess he won't really be a toy, will he?" I said. "Damn. This secret shit about the name is driving me crazy. What's Cherie's daddy's name?"
       "I think she said it was Robert," Brian said. "Are you thinking they're going to name him that?"
       "They might. Robert Edward or Edward Robert. Something like that," I said. "Of course, I'm holding out for Kyle."
       They laughed.
       "Yeah, you would. That would be too confusing," Jus said.
       "Not to me. I'd be Kyle; he'd be Little Kyle, just like Little Kyle Broman, from North Carolina," I said.
       "I thought the Bromans live in Chicago," Brian said.
       "Yeah, they do, but we met them in North Carolina. Speaking of that, would y'all like a long weekend up there? I don't think we're getting much of a vacation this summer," I said.
       "Hell, yeah. I love it there," Jus said. "I could cheerfully live there."
       "I know. Me, too. Would y'all mind if we took Philip and Ryan with us?" I asked.
       "Hell, no. We could take Gage and Chad, too," Justin said. "There's plenty of room up there and in your new car, too."
       "That's a good plan," I said.
       I picked up my new car early Friday morning after I graduated. To me, there's no better smell than the smell of a new car. I had no idea what my daddy had worked out about the price, and I knew he wouldn't tell me if I asked. I drove that thing home happy and proud.

Chapter 03

(Philip's Perspective)
       I tried to remember a time when Kyle Goodson was not my friend, and I couldn't do it. Everything I saw in my past life included Kyle. I was in love with him for a long time, but I thought there was no way he was gay. Hell, I didn't even know that's what I was. I never said anything to him about how I felt, though, because at eleven and twelve, I didn't really know it was love. Then we went through a time when we didn't really do that much together. We never had a fight or a falling out, or anything like that. We just got interested in different things, I guess. We made different friends, too. I still thought about Kyle all the time, but I thought about other people, too. Like Ryan.
       Kyle and I had known Ryan all our lives. Our parents all knew each other, and we'd see each other at family parties and picnics and such. Ryan went to a different elementary school than Kyle and I did, so we didn't see him every day. We all went to the same middle school, though, and that's when the three of us really hooked up as friends.
       Ryan had been a Cub Scout since he was eight years old. Kyle and I had been Cubs that long, too, but we were in a different Pack than Ryan. In middle school, Ryan joined our Boy Scout troop, though, and that's when we all got to be really good friends.
       Kyle lived on a lagoon or a bayou or whatever the hell it was, and his family had a boat. We had a boat, too, but we didn't live on the water. I mean we did, but it was across the street, and you couldn't keep a boat there. Our boat was at a marina, and it was a lot of trouble to get it out on the bay, which was really where you wanted to be to ski. The bay or Kyle's lagoon. Ryan's family had a boat, too, but it was really too big to pull skiers. Too slow. It was more like a yacht or something. That meant Kyle was the ski captain. We spent the summers after sixth, seventh, and eighth grades on Kyle's boat. Or skiing behind it. That was about all we did, too. That, and surf and skateboard. The next summer Mr. Gene put Kyle's ass to work, but we still skied on the weekends.
       The summer after ninth grade was when I figured out I was gay. I knew I was different from Kyle and Ryan, but I didn't know what that really was. I fooled around on the Internet a lot that summer, and that's when I found out about myself. I was gay. I remember being scared to death when I finally admitted that to myself. I thought I was doomed to a life of isolation and ridicule.
       Ryan actually came out to me before I came out to him. He was spending the night at my house one night that summer, and that's when he told me. I started crying.
       "Why are you crying?" he asked. "I'm not going to do anything to you."
       "I know. I'm crying because I am, too," I said.
       "You are what? Are you gay, too?"
       "Yes, I think so," I said, between my tears.
       He hugged me, and I instantly got hard. He felt it, and I was embarrassed beyond words.
       "It's okay, Philip. I'm hard, too," he said.
       "I know. I can feel it," I said.
       "Do you like me?" he asked.
       "I love you, Ryan. I've loved you and Kyle for a long time," I said.
       "I know. Me, too," he said. "Kyle's not gay, though."
       "I know, but I'm so glad you are," I said.
       From there it progressed, and Ryan and I got more and more physical with each other over the next few weeks and months. We decided to become boyfriends, although we really didn't know what that meant. We loved each other, though, but we kept quiet about it, even from Kyle.
       Ryan, Kyle, and I were all Eagle Scouts. Tim was a new friend of Kyle's, and new to our troop, too, and he was doing his Eagle Project in February or March when Kyle, Ryan, and I were sophomores. Tim was a freshman. Kyle got us to help. That was the day I told Kyle that Ryan and I were boyfriends, and he told me he and Tim were boyfriends, too. That changed everything, and it changed nothing, at the same time. Maybe I loved Kyle in a different way then, more like a brother than I did before, but I still loved him. And he still loved me.
       "Kyle, what do you think about us being gay?" I asked him one time.
       "I don't think anything about it. It's just the way we are, Philip. We can't do anything about it. It's not something you can take back, you know? It's just us, man," he said.
       "I know, but don't you think things might have been different between us, if we had known," I said.
       He put a hand on each of my shoulders, and he looked at me intensely.
       "I've loved you since I was four years old, Philip. I've always loved you, and I always will. It's just different now, you know? You've got Ryan, and I've got Tim. That's not going to change anything between us, Philip. The four of us are going to be tight the rest of our damn lives, man. We're going to be best friends forever," he said.
       "I know. I hope so, anyway. We'll all be gay together," I said.
       That Memorial Day after we graduated was the day we were all going to be gay together. We were going to Pensacola for a big gay celebration, and I was excited about it. Kyle and Tim had traveled to places where there were gay neighborhoods and big gay clubs, but Ryan and I hadn't yet done that. We both had the money to travel, but we both had parents who didn't want us doing that. There were a few places in Emerald Beach that were specifically gay, but not that many. I wanted to be out and proud among my gay brothers.
       Ryan and I spent the night at Kevin and Rick's house. We had done that a million times or more, but we wanted to be there so we could get an early start the next day. Kevin's family was there, and they had been there for several days. We had a real nice dinner Sunday night, and they left with Kyle's parents to go to Destin, where they were staying. They took Ron with them, and Kyle, Tim and them were very sad about him leaving. There were a lot of tears when those people left.
       We played around in the pool after they left.
       "So what is this thing going to be tomorrow?" Rick asked.
       "I don't know. I've read it's supposed to have a hundred thousand gay people there," I said.
       "Why do you want to go? Are you looking to hook up?" Rick asked. I knew he was teasing me.
       "If he does, I'll cut his damn balls off," Ryan said. "There won't be nothing to hook up to, when I finish with him."
       "Such tender endearments. That's what I love about you Beach Rats. You're always so sweet to each other," Rick said.
       That made everybody laugh.
       "He knows I'll do the same damn thing to him, if he tries to hook up with somebody," I said.
       "You guys are in this for life, aren't you?" Rick asked.
       "Yes, sir," Ryan and I said at the same time, without hesitation.
       "I just noticed. Your tattoos are identical, except for the name under them," Chuck said. "It's like you've marked each other."
       Ryan and I grinned big because that was exactly what those tattoos were supposed to mean. That was our outward sign of commitment to each other. I didn't really see us ever wearing rings or anything like that, but we wore those tattoos proudly, as a sign of our love.
       The next morning, they cooked a big breakfast, and we were on the road by 7:30. We were all in Kyle's new Land Cruiser, and he was at the wheel. The traffic wasn't too bad that morning, and we were making decent time. It was only about a hundred miles to Pensacola, but I had known it to take three hours or more because of the traffic.
       "Is it okay to smoke, Kyle?" Kevin asked.
       God, I was glad he asked that because I wanted one so bad, and I knew Ryan did, too. I really didn't think Kyle gave a shit, but it was a brand new car.
       "No, I don't think it is, Kevin. I think it's bad for you. It causes heart trouble, and then you have to go to some quack heart surgeon for him to cut you open and let all that smoke out," Kyle said.
       We all knew Kevin's daddy was a heart surgeon, and that made us laugh.
       "I'll take my chances," Kevin said, and he lit up.
       Ryan, Jus, and I lit up, too.
       "Are y'all stinking up my brand new car?" Kyle asked.
       He was using what my daddy called the "Emerald Beach Grumble," a way of talking we had learned from our daddies and other men and boys, and we had used it all our lives. That was the way guys talked to each other when they were teasing and having fun with their friends. It was kind of gruff.
       "Yeah. Are you going to make something of it?" Ryan asked.
       "I will if you don't give me one," Kyle said.
       We laughed, but he shook it off when Justin offered him a smoke. He had just said that for the laugh.
       We didn't really know where we were going. Pensacola Beach is a pretty damn big place, and there were a lot of people out there. Then we saw a big rainbow flag, so we figured that was it. We found a place to park on one of the roads leading down to the water, and there were tags from all over the damn place. In fact, the Florida tags were the rare ones.
       There were tents and little trailer things set up all over the place. Those were the booths and concessions. There were hundreds of people on the beach, and it seemed like they were all guys. Most of them were wearing Speedos or some kind of bathing suit, but we passed three or four groups that were all dressed in leather. They had on leather vests and jeans and leather chaps. Boots, of course. Leather caps, too.
       "That bunch is going to boil their balls by the end of the day," Kyle said. "I don't know how they're not already so hot they can't stand it. I'm hot, and all I've got on is shorts and a tee shirt."
       "I think they're making a statement, Kyle," Kevin said.
       "What's the statement? 'I'm sweat-gland free?'"
       We all laughed.
       "I know what you're saying, Kevin. That's the leather boys, right?" Kyle said. "We saw that at that bar in New Orleans. The one where we thought they were going to eat us up."
       The next bunch to catch our eye was two young guys in leather jock straps. Both jock straps had snaps at the top of the pouch, and one guy's pouch was partly unsnapped and his dick was hard. Both the boys had collars around their necks, and an older guy was "walking" them on leashes. Their hands were tied behind their backs. The older guy was just a-grinning, and he was hard, too. He had on jeans, so his was covered up.
       After they had passed us a good ways, we turned to one another and started laughing. That was exactly the kind of stuff I had wanted to see, and now I was seeing it.
       "You guys are getting an education this morning," Rick said.
       "I know. What was that all about?" I asked.
       "Philip, those two boys and that man needed, or at least wanted, just what they were doing. I don't claim to understand it, but if we want straight people to accept us and take us seriously, we've got to be willing to accept and take seriously guys like that. They were obviously into some kind of domination thing, and those boys were enjoying it. You saw how aroused that one boy was, and that man, too," Kevin said. "And guys, don't think that's just a gay thing. Straight people like that kind of scene, too. Some of them."
       I tried to imagine my mama leading my daddy on a leash like that, or vice versa, and the image just wouldn't come.
       There was one group of about eight guys who had on ragged cutoff blue jeans but no shirts. Every one of them was covered with thick body hair, and it looked like they could make two more of them if they each lost the weight they needed to lose.
       "Did you guys notice that group of bears back there?" Kevin asked.
       "Bears? You mean those big fat guys?" I asked.
       "Yeah. Fat and hairy," Kevin said.
       "What make 'em bears?" Kyle asked.
       "Their size and their hairiness," Kev said.
       We had taken off our tee shirts by then because it was pretty hot.
       "You got the hairiness for it, Stud," Justin said to Kyle.
       Jus reached to grab a handful of the hair on Kyle's chest, but Kyle dodged him. I had noticed last summer that one day he had a good crop of it growing, and the next day it was gone. I figured he shaved it.
       "Are you going to shave your chest this summer, Kyle?" Rick asked.
       "I don't know," Kyle responded. "He likes it."
       "Little Timmy likes that soft, cuddly feel of his big ole bear, don't you, Timmy?" Justin said, teasing Tim.
       "I hate to tell you this, Justin, but have you looked at your own boyfriend lately?" Tim asked.
       I had already noticed that ole Brian had grown him quite a bit of hair on his chest, too. I had some, too, but mine was real light.
       "I know. I'm just teasing you, Tim. I know he's done furred up on me, and he's the one with the teddy bear tattoo, if you remember," Jus said. "I don't know what that's supposed to mean."
       We all laughed. Kyle and Brian were the two hairiest ones of us, but they were nowhere close to being the kind of bears those other guys were. I figured it was that dark hair and darker complexions they both had that did it.
       We found a place to set up "camp" on the beach, further down from the festival, or whatever you might call it. We had a couple of coolers with beer, soft drinks, water, and food, and we had several bags of non-perishable stuff, too. Things like chips, nuts, pickles, olives, pickled okra. You name it. The first thing Kyle did was set up a little buffet of snacks on the tops of those two coolers. That boy loved to entertain, and he was good at it, too.
       I had noticed that the farther we got away from the festival area, the more skin we saw. There were naked guys everywhere. A lot of it was just milling around, seeing and being seen. There were some people in the Gulf, but most of the people were right there on the beach. Kyle and Tim both took off their shorts, and they had Speedos under them. Ryan and I hadn't thought of that, and we had just worn underwear.
       I was totally in love with Ryan, and totally satisfied with him sexually and every other way, but, you know, you just can't look at guys like Kyle and Tim without feeling some kind of reaction. Then Justin and Brian did the same thing, and, Oh, my God! I had seen all four of them stark naked a million times without even giving them a second look, but that day every drop of blood in my body was headed right to my dick. I didn't know what that was all about, either.
       "Are you going to stay dressed up the whole time?" Kyle asked me.
       "This is a little bit much for me, Kyle. I need to settle down, get calm, and get used to it all, you know?" I said.
       He grinned at me, and I knew what that was all about. He knew me too damn good.
       "Don't say anything, you hear me?" I said, using the Grumble. "I'll kick your ass, Kyle. I swear to God I will."
       "You don't want me to say anything about that wet spot on your shorts? Is that what you mean?" he said.
       "Goddamn it, Kyle," I said.
       He started laughing, and he dropped down onto the sand next to me.
       "Gimme a smoke," he said.
       "When are you going to start buying 'em? You can, you know? You're eighteen," I said.
       "Shut up, Philip, and gimme a smoke," he said.
       * * *
       We had a great day. Eventually, all the boys got naked and walked around. We even went back to the festival area naked, and probably fifty percent of the guys there were just like us. We saw some sights there, too. I saw several guys who had these big stainless steel rings through their dicks. It looked like the ring went into the bottom and came our the piss slit. I didn't know what that was all about, and I didn't ask any of them about 'em. I wished I could get me a closer look, though. About half the guys had tattoos or some kind of body piercing, or both, and that was cool.
       I had seen a whole array of different dicks at Kevin and Rick's house, of course, but all the guys were young. That day I saw dicks of every size and shape and color, and of every age, too. It was amazing to me. They were all dicks, no question about that, but they were so different. It was like every guy had his own signature dick. I saw some that were so big I didn't think they could ever get hard and stand up against gravity. I saw some little ones, too, that were just like mushroom caps hiding in a forest of pubic hair.
       Around mid-afternoon, we went back to our camp. I laid down on a big beach towel to catch forty winks. I was tired from getting up early and from all that sun.
       The next thing I knew, two guys were standing over me, kicking sand onto my crotch. I looked to my right and my left, and nobody was around me. None of my boys, I mean.
       The two guys standing over me were big bruisers. They had on Levis and leather chaps, leather caps, and black boots. No shirts, though. They both had real thick moustaches.
       "Get up, faggot. You're coming with us," one guy said.
       "I'm not going anywhere with you," I said.
       "Oh, yes, you are, boy. Get up," the one guy said.
       "Leave me alone, man," I said.
       "No way. Your ass is mine tonight," he said.
       "Mine, too," the other guy said.
       I was scared to death. I didn't know who those guys were or what they wanted, but I knew I didn't want any part of it. Where are my boys, I thought.
       The one guy reached over and grabbed me by my pubic hair. That hurt like hell.
       "Get up," he said.
       "RYAN!!!!! KEVIN!!!!! RICK!!!!! KYLE!!!!! JUSTIN!!!!!" I screamed.
       In a second they were all there. Rick hit the guy who was pulling my pubic hair in the face with his elbow, and that guy went down. The other one started running, and Justin tackled him, sending him face first into the sand. Kyle and Ryan helped me up, and Ryan grabbed me up into a huge hug right there in front of them.
       In a second, Justin and Rick had those two guys on their knees in front of us. They had them by their hair, and I could tell it hurt.
       "I'm calling the cops," Kyle said.
       He got his cell phone out of his backpack in an instant, and he had that thing ready to go.
       "Call 'em if you want to, but they ain't going to come," one of the guys said. "Him and me made a mistake, but y'all might as well let us go."
       "I don't think so, dude. You are not going to mess with our brother the way you just did and get off. Why won't the cops come?" Rick asked.
       "Cause we're all queer out here, that's why. They wouldn't come out here for a bunch of niggers, either. As far as they know, it was just a little love spat among queers," he said.
       I was totally infuriated, and I could tell the rest of them were, too.
       "You mean, we can spend our money here, but we can't have police protection?" I asked.
       "You got it, buddy. Y'all ain't getting any help, so you might as well forget it and let us go," he said.
       "Shit, this is fucked up," Kyle said. "Let's take their clothes and drown 'em."
       "I'll buy taking their clothes, but we're not killing anybody, Kyle," Kevin said.
       "Take 'em off," Jus said.
       "We don't have anything else to put on," the second guy said.
       "Tough shit. Take the fucking clothes off, man. Do it right now," Jus said.
       Their asses were white as a cloud, and I knew they were embarrassed. Kyle grabbed a lock of the pubic hair of the guy who had gotten mine, and he yanked. That guy felt it, too, and he let out a howl.
       "You don't fuck with my brother, you hear me?" Kyle screamed.
       "Lighten up, man," the guy said. "Goddamn, that hurts."
       "No, I'm not lightening up on you. That boy has been my best friend all my life, and you ain't getting away with nothing, you fucking son of a bitch."
       That guy was naked by then, and Kyle shoved him on his ass and made him fall face-first into the sand.
       "You are so fucking lucky they won't let me drown your ass because that's exactly what the fuck I want to do," Kyle said.
       Kyle grabbed him by his hair, and I knew that hurt.
       "You tell him you're sorry for what you did, you motherless piece of shit," Kyle said.
       "I'm sorry, man," the guy said.
       "Kick his face in, Philip," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, calm down, man. I'm not doing that. He didn't hurt me, except to pull my hair, and you got him back for that. I think Rick might have broken his nose. That's enough, Kyle," I said.
       "I want to go home," Kyle said. "I've had enough of this shit. What do y'all think?"
       We all said we wanted to go home, too. We had planned to stay for the fireworks that night, but we were ready to get out of there.
       We packed up and went home. We ran the two guys off, but we left their clothes right there for them to get.
       "I hope the Disney trip ain't going to be like this," Kyle said on the way home.
       "I know," I said. "I don't want that, either."

(Brian's Perspective)
       The last part of May was all about Kyle. And that was the way it was supposed to be. He was graduating from high school, after all, and that was a pretty important milestone. Kyle was my ultimate big brother, and I was as proud of him as I could be.
       "Brian, I'm so proud of you, I could bust," Kyle said.
       "What do you mean?" I asked.
       "The whole thing, man. You learning all that stuff from Mr. Mack, and you turning into a real dog man. And winning the science fair, and all. You and Tim are pretty remarkable guys," he said. "Y'all are the two smartest guys I know, but I think you might be a little bit smarter than Tim."
       "Thanks, Bubba," I said.
       Kyle was always pretty free with compliments, but, for some reason, I was suspicious. I figured he wanted something.
       "I know Denny's a good writer, but I don't think he holds a candle to you," Kyle said.
       "Have you ever even read anything I've written?" I asked.
       "Well, not exactly, but I just have that feeling about you, Bri. I just know it in my heart," he said.
       He was being so serious that I couldn't help smiling. He was being cute.
       "What do you want, Kyle?" I asked.
       "Now, Bubba, don't say that. You make it sound like you think I'm buttering you up or something," he said.
       I laughed.
       "So where are we going with this?" I asked.
       He looked down at his hand and started scratching the side of his left index finger. Kyle had some kind of skin condition that flared up when he got nervous or anxious. His hands broke out in tiny little blisters that itched him badly. He usually ended up scratching himself until he broke the skin, and, when he did that, he'd get these really ugly scabs. He put his hand to his mouth and started scratching the spot with his teeth.
       "Don't do that. You're going to break the skin and get scabs on your hand," I said.
       "It itches bad, though," he said.
       "Use some of the salve the doctor gave you for that," I said.
       "I don't know where it is," he said.
       "What is it you want me to do, Kyle? You know I'll be glad to help you, if I can," I said.
       Like everybody else in the family, I'd do anything for Kyle. I thought he knew that.
       "Yeah, I do, but this is going to be hard," he said.
       "What is it?"
       He made a deep sigh.
       "You know my book. . . That picture book?"
       "Yeah, what about it?"
       "I'm needing some help with it," he said. "I've got to finish it before we go to Disney and get it in the Fed Ex to them."
       We had a week off between Memorial Day and our trip to Gay Days in Orlando. I would start summer school and working for Mr. Mack when we got back, and the rest of them would start their summer jobs then, too.
       "Have you started it?"
       "They sent me some notes they wrote in New York, and they want me to organize it and get it all polished up," he said.
       "Do you want me to work with you on that, Kyle?" I asked.
       "Brian, I know that's trouble, man, but that's what I need. I can pay you for doing it," he said.
       "Kyle, I can't believe you just said that. You've already paid me way too much in modeling fees. I checked on that. The going rate around here is $75 an hour, not $750, like you paid me," I said. "Besides, what kind of brother would I be if I only helped you because you paid me?"
       "Just seventy-five and not seven fifty? Shit, I got the damn decimal point wrong. You know I'm lousy at math," he said.
       I screamed with laughter. The day Kyle Goodson couldn't handle money, decimal points and all, was going to be the day the world ended.
       "Kyle, I will be honored to help you with that book. Most of the people I've known in my life couldn't even read a book, much less write one. Where's the stuff? Let's get started," I said.
       "It's on the hard drive of the computer in the study," he said. "I have it on a couple of Zip disks, too. They sent me those in the regular mail. Those have the pictures and the words. We just need to fool with the words, though."
       We went into the study to look at what he had. I immediately realized that the only way to work with that was in hard copy.
       "We need to print this whole thing so we can look at the pictures as we work on the text," I said. "This is a pretty slow printer, though."
       It was a Hewlett Packard Desk Jet in the 800 series. It was a very good printer for home use, but we were beyond regular home use at that point.
       "Let's take it to Goodson and use that good printer they got there," he said.
       And that's what we did. It took us about an hour and a half to print the entire book, pictures and all. That was the fastest and best laser printer I had ever seen.
       "Kyle, these pictures are fantastic. I've never seen most of these," I said.
       "Thanks. A good many of them are of you," he said.
       He had his finger back up to his mouth, scratching with his teeth. There were other spots on his hands that he was scratching, too, by then.
       Once we had it printed out, we went back home to work. The way the book was set up, the picture was going to be on the right-hand page, and the copy was going to be on the left-hand page. We worked at the dining room table. I would read the copy aloud, and then he and I would study over it to see if it said what we thought the picture conveyed. We made a pretty good team, and we both contributed ideas. I had a laptop computer set up on the table, and I was typing in changes onto the zip disks as we worked on them.
       We broke for lunch and went out to get something to eat. Tim and Denny went with us. We talked about what Kyle and I had been doing.
       "You don't want our help?" Denny asked. He sounded like he might be a little hurt.
       "I'm the one who suggested Brian, Denny," Tim said. "I know you're a good writer and all, and I'm not bad, but I thought this was something Brian needed to do. Are you mad at me, Brian?"
       I didn't believe what he had just said. Mad at him? He had just given me an enormous honor, and he thought I might be mad at him?
       "Tim, how could you think that? I'm having a great time doing it," I said.
       "You're getting credit for it, too, don't think you're not," Kyle said. "I'm dedicating the book to Tim Murphy and all the boys of Emerald Beach, though. But you'll get credit by name, Brian. In addition to the dedication."
       Everybody was a little stunned by that announcement.
       "I can't believe I have a brother who's writing a book," Denny said. "Two brothers, I mean."
       "It's really just mostly pictures," Kyle said. "It ain't like we're writing a novel or something."
       "But, still, Kyle," Denny said. "You're only eighteen. How many eighteen-year-olds write books of any kind?"
       "Well, let's change the subject. Who wants to sleep on the island tonight?" Kyle asked.
       We all did, and that occupied conversation for the rest of lunch.
       That first day we worked on the book was the Tuesday after Memorial Day, and Kyle and I worked that afternoon until the rest of them got home from work. Kevin and Rick didn't want to go to the island, but Jus, Chuck, and Tony did. We called Jeff and Ty to see if they wanted to go, but we never could get them. They either weren't home or weren't answering their phone at home. They both must have had their cell phones turned off, too. We didn't bother leaving messages. Denny called Brady, and he wanted to go, and we got Chip to go with us, too.
       Since there were nine of us going, plus the two dogs, we decided to take two boat loads. In less than two hours, we had all the people and all the equipment over there. We did our usual nudist thing on the island, and we played all the games we usually did. Nobody went in the water because there was no way to shower off, and we didn't want to be all sticky from the salt. The next morning Kyle ferried the working boys into shore to get ready for work. He brought back breakfast for the rest of us, and we packed up camp, such as it was, and left right after we ate.
       "Tim, can you take the wheel, please?" Kyle asked.
       "Sure, but what's the matter?" Tim asked.
       "I've got to take a shit so bad I can't stand it," Kyle said.
       He walked to the back of the boat, hiked down his shorts, stuck his butt out over the stern of the boat, and took care of business. It took less than a minute, and then he asked us to pass him some paper napkins, which we did.
       "Kyle, that was so cool," Chip said. "I've never seen anybody do that before."
       "Cool or not, it had to be done," he said.
       We all laughed.
       I thought about the fact that Kyle and I were working on an art book he had created, that a major international publisher was willing to invest money in, with the hope of reaping a profit. And there I was, his collaborator on the text of the book, watching him relieve himself off the end of a boat. Unbelievable.
       The next two days, Kyle and I poured over that manuscript. Most of the stuff the people in New York had written was very good, and Kyle and I both liked it. We made minor changes here and there to that material. The trouble was, they really hadn't written anything for about ten of the seventy pictures in the book. Kyle and I had to come up with that. That's what took the time.
       The comments in the text were supposed to help the reader understand nuances of the pictures. It was sort of a critical commentary on the photos. Like other artists I had read about, Kyle pretty much didn't have a clue about what any of it "meant." The whole book was supposed to show aspects of boyhood, and the pictures definitely did that. But what do you say about a picture that showed me and Tim reading in the den with our feet propped up? And Tim with a hole in the big toe of his sock? We both had pretty intense looks on our faces, but all we were doing was reading.
       "This one here baffles me," Kyle said, referring to that picture. "What do you say about that? 'Boys who need new socks are sometimes serious readers?'"
       I laughed, of course.
       There were a few nudes in the book, but all of them were of guys over eighteen, and none of them were porno. They were just nude studies. One was of Justin with a huge slice of watermelon. He had already taken a few bites out of it, and he was holding that thing in both hands and grinning. There were flecks of watermelon around his mouth, and a black watermelon seed was stuck to his penis.
       "And this one, too. 'Naked boys like watermelon?'"
       I laughed.
       "Both of those are magnificent pictures, Kyle. I'll think of something," I said.
       We did that for two-and-a-half days, and we had it all finished by late Thursday morning, around eleven.
       "Let's email it to 'em," Kyle said. "And then send them the disks, too."
       We sent the email, and then he and I drove to the closest Fed Ex pick-up box. We put those disks in the box and went home.
       Doing that work with Kyle wasn't easy, and I knew why he needed help. But that work let us bond like he and I had never bonded before. Justin and I were lovers, Tim and I were best friends and had science fair and other school-related things, and now Kyle and I had that book. I had a special and unique relationship with each of those three guys, and I loved it.
       * * *
       We left for Disney World and Gay Days at one o'clock on the day we put the book in Fed Ex. There were eight of us in Kyle's new car: Kevin, Rick, Kyle, Tim, Philip, Ryan, Justin, and me. Jeff and Tyler were in Jeff's car, but they had left earlier in the day after Ty's last class. All of us were staying at the Hotel Royal Plaza, which was the host hotel for Gay Days.
       The trip to Orlando took us about seven hours, and we all took turns driving.
       "I wish Denny had come with us," I said.
       "I know, but he's a little young yet," Kevin said. "Besides, he was glad to get the extra money for those tickets. He sure does seem happy, doesn't he?"
       "He told me that he was happier than he ever imagined being, especially after he and Brady started dating," Kyle said. "I think those two are pretty cute, don't you?"
       "I think they're very cute," Rick said. "When is the summer crowd going to start rolling in?"
       "We're getting home Monday, right?" Tim asked.
       "Right," Kevin said.
       "Well, my cousin Paddy is coming the next day. His brother, Tony, wanted to come, too, but his parents wouldn't let him. Just for a visit, though, not to live for the summer," Tim said. "They thought he was too young to have to go home by himself."
       "How old is he?" Kyle asked.
       "He's seventeen," Tim said.
       "That's old enough for him to come," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, not everybody's parents let them go all over the damn place by themselves, you know," Ryan said. "Mine and Philip's parents would no more let us go to Orlando without a grown-up on the trip than fly."
       "Mine would," Kyle said. "And there's nothing wrong with my parents."
       "I never meant that there was, Kyle," Ryan said.
       "But that's what your parents think, isn't it?" Kyle said.
       "My parents think the world of your parents, Kyle, and you damn well know it," Ryan said.
       "Kyle, your parents know that you've had a lot of experience traveling. They made it their business to make sure you knew how to handle yourself in new places and all. The biggest trip Ryan and I ever went on by ourselves was to Tallahassee to see his grandparents," Philip said. "It's just a difference in families, man. Miss Shirley and Mr. Pat love your parents, Kyle. They're some of their best friends, aren't they?"
       "Mr. Pat and my daddy grew up together," Kyle said. "Just like him and Mr. Cliff."
       "Is Mr. Cliff your daddy?" Justin asked Philip, and Philip nodded.
       "Well, I think the Ryans should have let Tony come on down to see us," Kyle said, "but it really ain't any of my business, I guess."
       "Are Chris and David coming, like we talked about last year?" Rick asked.
       "Yeah, but only for two weeks. They're getting here on June 20th and leaving on July 6th," Kyle said. "That's the most therapy he can miss. Otherwise, they might have stayed the whole summer."
       "Rick, we knew that, Babe," Kevin said.
       "I know," Rick said.
       "Is Seth coming?" Rick asked.
       "Yeah, but only for the Fourth of July. Him and Curt. Oh, you know what? Jerry told me that Father Vince, the priest in Sarasota, is coming for a visit then, too." Kyle said. "Evidently, they made friends when Jerry said the Mass with Vince for your grandpa's funeral, Rick. They've been writing and talking on the phone and all. They're going to spend a few days here and then drive over to New Orleans for some kind of meeting. A priest meeting, I guess."
       "Is Jeff going to see his brother this summer?" Tim asked.
       "Yeah. His brother and his partner are coming to see Jeff and Tyler. When he told me that, they didn't have a date set yet, though. But I'm guessing it will be for the Fourth. Josh and Patrick both graduated in May," Kevin said.
       "Do they need jobs?" Rick asked.
       "It's my understanding they have jobs lined up in Jacksonville," Kevin said.
       "Doing what?" Kyle asked.
       "They're both architects. Actually, Patrick is an interior designer, and Josh is straight architecture," Kevin said.
       "Interior designer. Nothing gay about that profession," Philip said.
       "Actually, Philip, he does industrial interior design. Like factories and stuff," Kevin said. "He's not Christopher Lowell on the Discovery Channel."
       "Well, thank God for that," Philip said.
       "Why the fuck do you care?" Kyle demanded.
       "'Interior designer' is a code word for 'interior decorator,'" Philip said. "Do you want your brother's brother's partner to be an interior decorator?"
       "Why would I give two shits and a holler what Jeff's brother's partner does for a living?" Kyle asked.
       "It's just too gay, that's all," Philip said.
       "Yeah? What do you want to be? Huh? A hairdresser? Or a florist?"
       That made us all laugh. Philip was just as masculine as Kyle and Justin.
       "I'm going to major in real estate and go into the real estate and development business with my brothers and my daddy, Kyle. You know that, asshole," Philip said. "My family has been doing that for years."
       "I know. Bilking the Goodsons, left and right," Kyle said.
       "You don't really believe that, do you Kyle?" Philip said. He was serious.
       Kyle laughed.
       "Philip, I don't know, and I don't care. Your daddy and my daddy have been friends since they were little boys. Our grandpas were friends, too. I have to figure that if we're still doing business with your family, it's all fair and square. I know this much, Philip. Business waxes and wanes, but friendships like ours and theirs don't," Kyle said.
       "I know," Philip said.

Chapter 04

(Kyle's Perspective)
       I was really looking forward to going to Disney World with Tim, Justin, and Brian. None of them had ever been there, and I knew we were going to have us a good time. I couldn't care less about the gay part of it. I mean, I'm as gay as the next guy, but that wasn't something I ever thought much about. I had been to plenty of gay places and gay events, so it wasn't really something that meant that much to me. That wasn't true for Philip, though.
       I knew Philip just about as well as I had ever known anybody, including my own family. I had loved him since I was little, and I think he had loved me that long, too. He seemed to have a need to be part of a larger gay movement or something, though.
       We got to the Royal Plaza Hotel around nine o'clock, Eastern Time, on Thursday night. The Gay Expo was just shutting down when we got there, but we'd have plenty of time to see that. It was, like, fifty exhibitors, every one of them specifically dealing with gay stuff. And I'm not talking just trinkets and gay flags and shit like that. I'm talking stuff like the Queer as Folk show, the big beer companies, the big record companies, and a lot of big things that have gay-related products and services. My daddy had told me that when he went to conventions for our brand hotels that the exhibits were usually the best part of the meetings, and I figured this was going to be about the same thing.
       We checked in and got two rooms, with two doubles each. We had already decided that we would be swapping around so that we could spend the night with a different couple each time. Tim and I were up to spend Thursday night with Kevin and Rick, and that wasn't a problem for us. I figured he and I would get up early and leave the room to give them some privacy Friday morning. I knew they wouldn't do anything with us in the room, and they needed their time together. Jeff and Ty had a room to themselves, but all three rooms were in a row. I knew we'd be back and forth.
       Of course, we didn't go there to spend time in a hotel room. We went there to have a good time out with everybody else. We missed the Welcome! cocktail party that first night, and we needed food. We had eaten junk all along the way, but we needed a good, substantial meal. We all gathered up in our room, and Rick and Justin made drinks for those who wanted them. The boys and I had gone down to the vending machines to get cokes and snacks, and we had a pile of stuff to nibble on.
       "Where are we going tomorrow?" Justin asked.
       "Sea World tomorrow, Disney on Saturday, and Universal Studios for Islands of Adventure on Sunday," Kevin said.
       "Did you see that on the Web site, because that's the traditional line-up?" Jeff said.
       "Yeah, I did, Jeff," Kevin said. "There are going to be a lot of red shirts at all those places when we're there. I think the red shirts are a great idea, by the way."
       "I know. Me, too," Philip said. "I've felt empowered since I put this thing on this morning."
       "You need to empower you some Mennen Speed Stick. You're starting to get a little bit ripe there, Philip," I said.
       "Kyle, if you hadn't said that, you would have ruined this trip for me," Philip said. "But check your own pits, too, son."
       "I know, but I like the way I smell," I said. "I actually like the way my shit . . . "
       "That's enough, Kyle. Philip," Kevin said, interrupting me.
       We had us a couple of drinks, and I was feeling pretty good. That Rick was something else. He never touched a drop of alcohol, except maybe a little wine with dinner, now and then, but I knew he was the one who had brought the booze along. Kevin was a wonderful man, and he drank right along with the rest of us. But he never thought about tucking a bottle or two in a suitcase. The same with Justin. I never saw him turn down a drink, but he never thought about bringing any. I didn't know if Philip and Ryan had brought anything. We weren't out to get drunk, but a drink now and then can help a celebration. And we were damn sure out to celebrate that weekend.
       We went out to an Outback Steak House near our hotel, and we had us a wonderful meal. I don't think you could beat steak and potatoes if you tried. I mean, I love every form of seafood, raw or cooked, but you get a nice prime rib or a New York Strip or something like that, with a baked potato with butter and sour cream, and that's got to be a taste of heaven. A good salad to start it off, and you're on your way.
       "Can I tempt you with some dessert?" the waiter asked when we were finished eating.
       Yeah, he could tempt every one of them. Not me, though. I don't know why I can't eat dessert after a meal like that, but I never could. I wanted exactly one bite of whatever Tim was having, and that's it. I wanted coffee, and that particular night I wanted a cigarette, too, but no dessert for me.
       Back at the hotel, we were all in our room for a nightcap. I had seen a movie one time where this guy asked another character if he wanted a nightcap. He said, "No, I never wear 'em." The actor who said that line was Leslie Nielsen, and I thought at the time that was one of the funniest things I had ever heard. All that Nielsen guy had to do was open his mouth, and I laughed.
       It was late when we went to bed, but I had to keep reminding myself that we were really an hour earlier than that place because we lived in Central Time. That thing about Central Time was a little known fact in Florida, but our part of the state was in Central. That meant that our sunrises and sunsets were an hour earlier than the next county over to the east of us, but that's the way it was in Emerald Beach, Florida, like it or not.
       The next morning after breakfast we went to Sea World. The very first thing we did was go on Kraken. That one was a fine ride, too. This is what the sign said about it.

               Remember the monster under your bed? Well, it grew up! Kraken, the monster of all roller coasters, is the tallest, fastest, longest and only floorless roller coaster in Orlando. It will take you to the heights of a 15-story building and turn you upside down seven times, all at speeds reaching 65 mph!
               Named after a legendary sea monster, Kraken is a massive, mythological underwater beast that's unleashed from the depths of the sea to take SeaWorld guests on the ride of their lives--lifting them higher, dropping them longer and spiraling them faster than any other coaster in Orlando.
               Riders' feet dangle as they sit on open-air, pedestal-like seats with nothing around them except shoulder restraints. There's no one to hold on to, nothing in front of them and nothing below them--and only sky above.

       I had never been on that thing before, and that was the scariest damn ride I had ever been on in my life. I ain't ashamed to admit it. I almost peed my pants.
       The next one up was the Journey to Atlantis.
       "What the hell was that last thing?" Justin asked.
       "It was a roller coaster, Bubba. Did you like it?" I asked.
       "I almost puked, Kyle," he said. "It was fun, but it was scary as hell, too."
       "Let's go," I said.
       The sign for Journey to Atlantis said,

               Get ready for the ultimate adventure ride--Journey to Atlantis! Traveling on water and high-speed rails, you'll be chased by spirits who want to keep Atlantis--and you--for their own! You'll never know what's around the next corner or the next drop--even when it's 60 feet, nearly straight down.
               Journey to Atlantis is the future of theme park thrill rides. Combining the best parts of water rides and roller coasters, and adding out-of-this world special effects, Journey to Atlantis is one of the most unbelievable rides imaginable.

       And it was just exactly that.
       "Kyle, I feel like my balls are around my neck," Justin said, when we got off that thing.
       "I know. Me, too," I said. "Where's the 'Sea' in SeaWorld?"
       "I know. I think it's all about sea monsters, and I think we just been on two of the monsters," Jus said.
       "Did you like 'em, though?"
       "I loved 'em. You know I loved 'em. I need to go to the bathroom pretty bad right now, though," he said.
       "Yeah. Me, too. Let's go," I said.
       We went to see Shamu, the killer whale, and Namu, his wife. They had seven of those things there, and one of the young boy ones got him a hard-on while we were watching.
       "You're making that dude excited, Tim," I said.
       He was laughing, just like the rest of us. There were red shirts everywhere I looked, so I knew the rest of the audience was probably enjoying the sight.
       "Shut up, Kyle," Tim said. "You're embarrassing me."
       "Am I really?"
       "No, but shut up, anyway," Tim said.
       I laughed at him, and we laughed together.
       They had dolphin and sea lion shows there, too. The ones at Gulf World back home were just about as good as those ones were. They didn't have those big whales at Gulf World, but I thought the dolphin and sea lion shows might have even been better at Gulf World.
       "Do you think this is better than Gulf World?" Philip asked me.
       "No. I think the show at Gulf World is better than this," I said.
       "Me, too," he said. "I want my money back."
       I laughed, and he laughed, too.
       "I don't think they give you your money back just because you happen to come from a place that has a better show," I said.
       "You don't think so, Kyle? Imagine that!"
       "You shitass. Get out of my face," I said.
       We both laughed hard.
       One thing they had there that we definitely didn't have in Emerald Beach was the Arctic and the Antarctic sites. You had to get on a helicopter to go there, and those two places were pretty unbelievable. They were inside, of course, and they were very cold. They had polar bears, walruses, and penguins. That was awesome. I was so damn cold, I was shivering.
       "Is Disney World this good?" Tim asked.
       "Tim, it's so different, you can't even compare the two," I said. "Just wait."
       "Where's the American history exhibit?" Justin asked me. "I want ole Andrew Jackson back in my life."
       He and I both laughed.
       "This ain't about American history, dumbass. It's about nature and science," I said.
       "You want to go up against me on science?" he asked.
       He had just gotten an A in biology and biology lab in college, and there was no way I was going to challenge that. Justin was a smart guy, and I knew it.
       "No way, Bubba," I said.
       He grabbed me around the neck and hugged me. It hurt a little, too.
       We stayed at SeaWorld as long as we could stand it, and then we went back to our hotel. We got coffee and snacks, and then we went to the Gay Expo. Some of that stuff was bogus. I mean, Gay Cellular Telephones? What the hell was that all about? I didn't want a telephone done up in the rainbow colors. My black one worked just fine.
       There was a tee shirt and cap shop that was pretty interesting. They had some pretty funny caps and tees, but there was no way I was going to wear any of that shit around Emerald Beach. I didn't want any of the gay-themed key chains, decals, posters, greeting cards, or any of the rest of that crap, either. I knew a lot of guys liked that kind of stuff, and more power to 'em. It just wasn't for me.
       We went up to our rooms to rest for a while, and then we got back together for dinner.
       "Where do y'all want to go for dinner?" Kevin asked.
       "I don't know. Do you want to try here?" Rick asked.
       The hotel sounded good to all of us. We were game.
       It turned out they had a real good buffet on Friday night, and that's what all of us got. We all ate good.
       "So, there's a circuit party tonight. Do you guys want to go to it?" Kevin asked.
       "I wouldn't mind going," Philip said. "How much?"
       "It's $85 a person," Kevin said.
       "What?!! You're kidding, right?" Philip asked.
       "No, that's what it costs, Philip," Kevin said.
       "Shit, I wouldn't pay that much to get in anywhere, except maybe a hospital if I was dying," he said.
       We laughed.
       "Well, that's what the party costs," Kevin said. "There's a pool party at our hotel. Admission is free, since we're staying there. Cash bar, though."
       "I'm wanting some splash, anyway," I said. "That pool party sounds great to me. Suits?"
       "Yeah, suits," Kevin said. "I wouldn't mind some splash myself. Let's make it an early night, though, guys. Tomorrow is a big day."

(Brian's Perspective)
       SeaWorld was the fifth big zoo I had been to in a couple of years, and I thought it was unbelievable. The animals were incredibly well cared for, and they were beautiful. There were a couple of zoos in Emerald Beach that I hadn't yet been to, but I was going to make it my business to get to both of them as soon as I could. There was actually a third zoo in Emerald Beach County, too, and it had recently been in the news when a tiger mauled the owner. I might have to check that one out, too.
       We got up pretty early on the day we went to Disney. In fact, we were all in the dining room of the hotel by 7:30. They had a breakfast buffet, which our family seemed to specialize in, and all of us got huge plates of food.
       "Are we going to try to stay together?" Rick asked.
       "I think we should, don't you?" Kevin said.
       "Yeah, if y'all do," Rick said.
       "What's the advantage of not staying together?" Kevin asked.
       "Well, different people like different stuff," Kyle said. "For instance, I'm not really interested in any gift shops. I've been in way too many of those things as it is, and they've got a ton of them in the park. My suggestion is we do it in hour increments. I mean, everybody's got a watch. We stop at a place, decide we'll meet back here in one hour, and we all go where we want to go."
       "I think Kyle's right. For instance, I'm not going on that damn teacup ride again. The last time I went on that thing, I puked my guts out. That is way too stressful to my intestinal tract," Philip said.
       Everybody laughed at the way he said that, but that was one ride I was actually looking forward to. I had seen it on TV, and it looked like a lot of fun to me.
       "I think we're going to want to spend most of our time in Frontierland and Tomorrowland," Kyle said. "I mean, that's where the big rides are. Frontierland has Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, which is a runaway mountain train roller coaster, and Splash Mountain, which is a log flume roller coaster. Those are both terrific. And Tomorrowland has Astro Orbiter, The ExtraTerrorestrial Alien Encounter, and Space Mountain. Those are the best rides in Disney World, in my opinion."
       "I'll second Kyle on those," Philip said. "This is like the sixth or seventh time I've been here, and those are the best in my opinion, too."
       "What about the teacups?" I asked.
       "I told you. I'm not going on those," Philip said.
       "Tim and I will go with you on that one, Brian," Kyle said. "I was with him on it when he puked, and we made it turn too fast. I did, I mean. I won't make you puke, Bri. That's a cool ride."
       "What about It's a Small World?" Tim asked.
       "Everybody ought to see that one at least once, although I hate that damn song. And the Country Bear Jamboree and the Hall of the Presidents, too. I forget that some of y'all ain't been here before. Tim, I'll do anything you want to do, Babe."
       Those were our marching orders for the day. The place itself was unbelievable to me. Everything was spotlessly clean, and there were more flowers around than, I believe, I had ever seen before. The castle that dominated the center of the place was spectacular, and everything was perfect. There were red shirts everywhere, and I felt completely at ease and at home.
       Justin was quiet.
       "What's the matter, Buddy? You seem quiet," I said.
       "Brian, I have never even imagined anything like this in my life," he said. "I'm having a wonderful time here with you, but I'm just trying to take it all in."
       "I know. It's a lot to take in, isn't it?" I said.
       "Yeah. I feel like a kid. I've never felt like a kid before. Free and innocent," he said.
       God! That ripped my heart. Justin was so good, so loving, so generous, so very kind. But so much bad had been done to him. So many bad men had used him and abused him. I teared up, but I didn't let myself cry. He was such an incredibly strong man, but I knew that if I cried it would worry him and bother him. I grabbed his hand as tightly as I could. I knew he was going to be the rock of support for me for the rest of my life. He squeezed my hand in return, and I knew that was a melding of our hearts.
       * * *
       One of the things I didn't know about was the parade in the afternoon. It was all the Disney characters, plus the Muppets and a lot more, riding in funny cars. Some were walking, too. There were some great bands, including some gay marching bands.
       As the end of the parade passed us, the security guards let down the barricade so we could all join in the parade.
       "They don't usually do this," Kyle said, as we stepped out to march.
       "It's probably special for Gay Day," Jeff said. "I've never seen this, either."
       There were thousands of people in red tee shirts and tank tops marching in the parade. It was a really impressive sight, and it gave me a lump in my throat to see it. I looked around at all of those rides and all of those buildings, and I thought of all the unbelievable fun that millions of people had had there. And it all started with a mouse.
       We got ice cream cones after the parade, and we found a shady place to sit, relax, and eat our ice cream.
       "Kevin and Rick, this is the most wonderful place I've ever been in my life," Justin said. His voice was thick with emotion, and I knew he was on the verge of crying. "Thank you for bringing us here."
       All of us were quiet, sort of soaking up the meaning for him of what Jus had just said.
       "Shit, I feel like a damn girl, crying like this," he said.
       Instead of the usual wisecracks or jokes, Kyle wrapped his arm around Justin.
       "You cry all you want to, Bubba. You still got some bad shit inside that you need to get out, and that's the way to do it," he said. "We love you Justin, and you're going to be our brother forever. You're safe with us."
       That made Jus cry more.
       "I know," he sobbed. "Do y'all know what today is?"
       "Saturday?" Kyle asked.
       We all laughed.
       "Today is the day y'all found me," Justin said. "It's kind of like my birthday, you know?"
       That was more than any of the five of us--Kevin, Rick, Kyle, Tim, and me--could stand, and we all started crying.
       "What's going on? There can be no tears in the Magic Kingdom," this heavyset young guy said. He was acting silly, probably to cheer us up.
       He was with two other guys, and they were both fat, too. Not like those bear guys we had seen in Pensacola. These guys were just overweight, and I was sure they had all been made fun of in high school. They were just the type who would have been.
       We all started laughing, and he got a big smile on his face.
       "Thanks, but these are very happy tears, brother," Kyle said. "Even though we're crying, we're probably the happiest people in this damn park right now."
       "Well, good. I was just trying to help out," he said.
       "Thanks, man," Justin said. "We were having a nostalgia moment."
       "I'm Herb, and this is my cousin Walt and Walt's boyfriend, Cameron," Herb said.
       We introduced ourselves and told him who our partners were.
       "Where are you all from?" Herb asked.
       We told him.
       "We're from North Carolina, more or less between Highlands and Cashiers. Ever hear of it?"
       We all got big, bright grins.
       "We certainly have. We're neighbors, in fact. My parents have a cabin right outside Highlands," Kevin said.
       "You're kidding?!" Walter said.
       "No, I'm not kidding. We were there in January, skiing," Kevin said. "Do you know Steve and Frank? The guys who run the flower shop in Highlands? They're friends of ours."
       "Oh, my God! Do we know them? They're, like, our mentors," Cameron said. "They introduced me to Walt and Herb. This is incredible!"
       One of them, Herb I think, started singing "It's a Small World, After All," and we all joined in. I looked at Kyle. He wasn't singing, and he rolled his eyes at me. I burst out laughing.
       "Sing, Kyle," Rick said. "You've got the best voice of all of us."
       "No! I hate that fucking song. I will never sing it," he said.
       We all laughed.
       The North Carolina boys ended up spending the rest of the day with us. We ate dinner in the park, and we stayed until it closed at ten. The fireworks were pretty spectacular over the castle, and the night parade, which they evidently only have on special occasions, like Gay Day, was really great, too. They used fiber-optic light on everything, from the floats to the costumes of the characters who were walking. We had seen some pretty spectacular night parades at Mardi Gras in New Orleans, but nothing compared to that.
       North Carolina came back to our hotel with us, and we had drinks and snacks in Kevin and Rick's room.
       "Where are you fellas staying?" Kyle asked them, once we were all settled in the air conditioning.
       "Well, we don't actually have a place," Herb said. "We slept in our car last night."
       "Nuh-uh," Kyle said.
       "Yeah, we did. We're doing this trip on the cheap," Herb said.
       "Kevin, come here," Kyle said. "I need to talk to you out in the hall."
       I looked at Tim and Rick, and they both grinned. They knew.
       "He's up to his old stuff. He ain't had a project in days," Justin said. "He picked a good day for it, too, don't you think?"
       We all laughed.
       "What's going on?" Herb asked.
       "You'll see," Jus said.
       "What time is it?" Jeff asked.
       He was wearing a watch, like the rest of us, but I was pretty sure he was ready to break up our little social but didn't want to just come out and say it.
       "It's not late. You'd best stay, Bubba," Jus said.
       "Jeff and Ty. Y'all come out here," Kyle said, sticking his head in the room.
       Jeff knew exactly what was going on, and he grinned at us as he and Ty were leaving the room.
       "Are you guys in school?" Tim asked.
       "I am, unfortunately," Cameron said. "Community college. Not this summer, though. I'm working for my homophobic father and uncle this summer."
       "Walt and I are working, or trying to," Herb said. "There isn't much work where we live, though."
       "Do you have jobs at all?" I asked.
       "Yes. We're servants. Walt and I share a job as a bellboy at a resort, if you call that a job."
       He expected a laugh, but he didn't get one.
       "That's what most of us do for jobs, too," Tim said.
       "That's pretty much what all of our brothers do," Justin said. "Or did. Jeff and I have been promoted to desk clerk. Our other brother, Chuck, is actually in sales now."
       Herb looked like he was a little embarrassed for having put down his bellboy job.
       The boys in the hall came back in. Kevin was the first to speak.
       "We've been talking about you guys bunking up with us. Jeff and Ty have a double bed in their room that's empty, and every one of these rooms has a sofa that opens into a single bed. Would you do us the honor of spending the night with us? No demands, guys. Just friends," he said.
       "Well, sure," Walt said.
       "That's awfully nice of you, Kevin, but I don't think . . .," Herb said.
       "No, you don't think. We were so hot in that car last night we almost died, and we didn't even get a shower this morning. Herbie, Cam and I are staying, even if you don't," Walt said. "These are obviously very nice people, and they're neighbors. They know Steve and Frank, for God's sake."
       "You've twisted my arm, Coz. Yeah, we'll stay. Thanks, guys," Herb said.
       We partied some more with those guys. They had actually parked their car within walking distance of our hotel, so they went down and got their stuff. All three of them wanted to take showers when they came back up, so that's what they did. After that, we went down to the pool. We ordered hamburgers and French fries from the food concession that was out there, and we had a good time talking.
       Around midnight, Justin said, "Little Buddy, I'm really tired. Let's go to bed, okay?"
       "Okay," I said.
       Walt and Cameron were sleeping in the bed in the room with Justin and me, and Herb was sleeping on our couch. They all started to get up to go to bed, too.
       "Give them a little time, okay, guys? This is a very special day for them," Kevin said.
       Those guys were no fools. They stayed put, and Justin and I went up to bed. Bed that night was about ten feet above heaven.

(Rick's Perspective)
       Kyle and Tim were sleeping in Jeff's room that night. Jeff and Ty left the pool area right after Justin and Brian.
       "Do you have your key, Ty?" Jeff asked.
       "Yeah," Ty said.
       "Here's my key, Bubba," Jeff said, handing his key to Kyle. "Give us about an hour, okay?"
       Kyle grinned and nodded.
       Philip and Ryan were sleeping in the room with Kevin and me, and they excused themselves.
       "Nighty-night, boys," Kyle said lecherously as Philip and Ryan were leaving.
       "Fuck you, Kyle," Philip said.
       "Me?" Kyle asked in an exaggerated way, and they both laughed.
       "Are you guys related in some way?" Herb asked, once Jeff and Ty, and Philip and Ryan were gone.
       "It's a pretty long and involved story, but, yes, we are related. But not by blood," I said. "Kevin and I are a married couple, and all of these guys are our foster sons, either legally or honorary. Except Ty. He's Jeff's partner, so that makes him part of the family, by default. Philip and Ryan are very close friends."
       "Wow! You mean, like, you've got this whole gay family?" Cameron said.
       "Yeah, and there are more of us, too. Brian and Denny, who isn't here, are our two official foster sons at the moment. Denny is home with Chuck, an honorary foster son. Denny's fifteen, and Chuck's twenty-two," I said.
       "Are those two, like, boyfriends?" Walt asked.
       "Oh, no. They each have a boyfriend, but they're not each other's boyfriend," Kevin said.
       "You must have a huge house," Herb said. "How many can you sleep?"
       "Twenty-four, if we use all the sofa-sleepers," Kyle said. "Thirty-two, if we use the condo."
       I had no idea we could put up that many people, but I was sure Mr. Hospitality was right. That was exactly the kind of thing he would know--for planning purposes, of course.
       "That doesn't count air mattresses and sleeping bags and shit like that," Kyle said. "Plus, my parents could put up another fourteen, if we had to. Well, no. Another eighteen, if we used their condo, too."
       "You could put up fifty people?!" Herb asked. "What are y'all running down there? A hotel?"
       "Actually, eleven hotels or motels, in addition to our houses," Kevin said. "We could really put up quite a few people. And we do so on a regular basis. At the hotels and motels, that is."
       I laughed, but the kids didn't think that was funny. Dumbasses.
       Hanging out around the pool was something we were masters at, and that's what we were doing. We were sipping drinks and watching the boys play in the water. I personally was too tired to get in that big splash-a-thon they were having in the pool.
       Kyle and Tim both had on red Speedos that night. Suddenly, Kyle's hand dove to his crotch, and he started working it.
       "What the hell are you doing?" Kevin asked.
       He knew damn good and well that Kyle was just scratching himself, but Kevin loved to tease Kyle about stuff like that.
       "I'm scratching my balls. What do you think I'm doing? They itch. Don't your balls ever itch?" Kyle said.
       Kyle was using the tone of voice that Philip had told me was called the "Emerald Beach Grumble."
       "Nobody around here would care if I scratched my balls except you, Kevin," Kyle said.
       The North Carolina boys looked like they thought the two of them were going to fight.
       "Maybe if they looked like real balls, I'd know that," Kevin said.
       Kyle pulled his suit up tight, and he opened his legs wide. His balls looked like two red Easter eggs through that suit.
       "You just ain't ever seen any. That's all," he said.
       Kevin, Tim, and I burst out laughing. The North Carolina boys looked kind of confused.
       "Who'd he get last?" Tim asked.
       "I think both of us on that one," I said. "Very good, Bubba. We don't get too many two-fers," I said.
       Of course, we had to explain the game to the North Carolina boys, and they laughed when they got the joke.
       "What do you guys do in Highlands?" Kyle asked.
       Herb and Walt explained about sharing a job at a resort.
       "I work for my father and my uncle at their lumber yard," Cameron said. "They consider me a pack animal."
       We laughed.
       "What do you do?" Kyle asked.
       "Basically, anything that's too good for a straight guy to do, including my homophobic brother," Cameron said. "I'm twenty, and he's two years older than me. His best friend works with us, too, and they basically spend their days making fun of me. I hate my family."
       "Walt and I are first cousins," Herb said. "Our respective families basically kicked us out when they found out we're gay. Last summer, right after we graduated high school. Since then, we've lived together, rather hand-to-mouth. The three of us have saved for over a year to come here this weekend."
       "You realize you're making me feel like shit, don't you?" Kyle said.
       "How so, Kyle? That's the furthest thing from our minds, man," Herb said.
       "Well, think about it. This afternoon, y'all saw us crying, and you wanted to help us feel good. You didn't know that those tears happened to be a celebration for this family, but all you wanted to do was make us happy. You thought we were sad. You took a big fucking risk to help us," Kyle said.
       "So?" Herb said.
       "So you guys were the ones who needed help. Not us. We should have been helping you guys. Not you helping us," Kyle said.
       "Aren't you guys helping us tonight? Right now?" Herb said.
       "I know, but it was sort of an accident, you know?"
       "How could we have planned it, Kyle?" Herb said. "Look at the three of us and at the however-many there are of you. Every one of you is slim, trim, lean, and good looking. And you're all very masculine. The three of us are fat, and we know it. And we're pretty femme. We know that about ourselves, and we accept that. It's who we are."
       "I don't get your point, Herb. The fact is, this family has resources. Deep ones that you guys don't have. I'm speaking purely for myself here, but I also think I'm speaking for my brothers. Herb, do you have a boyfriend?" Kyle asked.
       "No."
       "You and Walt are sharing a job. What would happen if one of you quit?" Kyle asked.
       "Well, I guess the other one would go on full-time," he said.
       "Kevin and Rick. I need to talk to y'all," Kyle said. "In private."
       "The answer is 'yes,' Kyle," I said, before he asked the question.
       "You mean it?"
       "I can put him to work, but I think he'd make more as a bellhop. Can you use him, Babe?"
       "Shit, I put three or four to work every week. This boy has experience, too. No problem," Kevin said.
       Kyle burst into a big grin.
       "Herb, if you're willing to move to Emerald Beach, you've got a job and a place to stay, at least temporarily," I said.
       "My God!" Walt said.
       The three of them were grinning their faces off. Those three boys, but especially Herb, were fat and effeminate. Three years before, when I was Mister Ironman, I wouldn't have given those boys a second thought. But time changes a lot. As Kyle had said, those guys, especially Herb, had taken a big chance that afternoon to help us when they thought we were needing help. The very least we could do was reciprocate. And they really were in need of some relief.
       "Let's get in the splash before we go to bed," Kyle said.
       Without waiting for a response from us, he dove into the pool. Tim was right behind him, and I knew Justin and Brian would have been on his heels, too, if they were there.
       "You guys are really something," Herb said. "Thank you."
       * * *
       Philip and Ryan were sound asleep in their bed when we got to our room that night.
       Kevin sniffed loudly a couple of times.
       "What does that smell like to you?" he asked in a whisper.
       "It smells like young love," I whispered back. "I could use some of that myself tonight."
       "Me, too, but we have to be quiet."
       "I love you so much," I whispered.
       He grinned.
       "Not as much as I love you," he said.
       We had fun that night, making love without making noise. We knew those two boys--adult males, technically--couldn't have cared less what we did, but it was kind of fun pretending we didn't want to wake the kids.
       God, I loved that man.

Chapter 05

(Tim's Perspective)
       Kyle and I spent the night in the extra double bed in Jeff and Tyler's room. We had met the boys from North Carolina, and they needed a place to stay. Kevin and Kyle, and Jeff and Ty, worked it out that we would be the ones to sleep in their room, rather than the strangers. The only problem was, Kyle and I hadn't had any privacy in a couple of days, and we knew Jeff was going to be the last one up.
       "Are you awake?" Kyle whispered.
       He was spooned into my back, and he had his arms wrapped around me. We had turned the air conditioner as low as it would go the night before so we wouldn't get hot in that kind of position. I felt his erection against my back.
       "Yeah, I'm awake," I whispered. "Get up and pee. I think we can be quiet enough."
       "I already did," he said.
       "I'll be right back," I said.
       I sat on the toilet to pee, and I didn't flush it. I didn't want to make any noise to wake Jeff and Ty. Kyle was grinning hard when I came back to bed with a towel from the bathroom. It didn't take long, but it was sure good.
       "We don't need showers," Kyle said. "We showered off last night after the pool, remember?"
       "Are you going to shave?" I asked. We were both still whispering.
       "Do you want me to?" he asked.
       "No, you look okay," I said.
       He brushed his chin across my left nipple. The stubble felt incredible on that spot, but there was a lot more of it than I thought. I looked at his face, and he hadn't shaved since Thursday morning.
       "On second thought, let's shave," I said.
       We took care of that chore, got dressed, and went down to Kevin and Rick's room. We tapped very gently on the door, so as not to wake them up if they were still asleep. We were about to turn and go downstairs when Rick opened the door.
       "Hey," he said, holding the door open wide for us to come in. "Did you sleep good?" He was talking softly.
       "Yeah. How about you?" Kyle asked. He used the same soft volume as Rick.
       "Yeah, same here. Everybody's still asleep but me," Rick whispered.
       Kyle got devilment in his eyes and a smile on his face.
       "Have y'all ever heard of putting a sleeping guy's hand in warm water?" Kyle asked. "It's supposed to make them pee."
       "I knew you were going to say that, and you're not doing it. You're not ruining these mattresses with some damn practical joke. Let's wait till a camping trip on the island," Rick said.
       He and Kyle laughed. Rick had as much of the devil in him as Kyle did. The difference was, Rick was more mature and saw consequences Kyle didn't think of.
       "The next time, okay?" Kyle said.
       And he and Rick laughed.
       "Absolutely, Bubba," Rick said. "Except, where are we going to get the warm water?"
       "That's what fires are for," Kyle said, and all three of us laughed.
       "Will you please go out in the hall to laugh and carry on," Kevin said in an annoyed tone of voice.
       Rick did his face in a look that said, He's grumpy this morning, and Kyle and I laughed.
       "We'll meet you downstairs, after you get the grumpster up and ready," Kyle said.
       We laughed, but we left.
       It was about 7:30 when we got down to the lobby, and there weren't many people around at all. We saw several guys come in from running, and we saw several go out to run, too. They had complimentary coffee out for the guests, so we each got a cup. It was from a Starbucks cart, and they served it in those paper cups they used. It was so hot that I could barely manage mine, even with the little cardboard handle they gave you.
       "I've got to have some ice in this before I can drink it," Kyle said.
       He went and found the ice machine that served the rooms on the first floor, and he brought back a paper cup of ice for our coffee. We each put some in our cups, and we were then able to start sipping it.
       We decided to take our coffee out by the pool, and there were already people in it. They looked like serious swimmers, though. There wasn't any playing around, and the guys were obviously swimming laps.
       We decided to walk around the area. It was landscaped like a garden, only the trees were all palm trees and not regular trees like we had in Emerald Beach. We had lots of palm trees, too, but that was all they had around there. No oaks or pines or other kinds of trees.
       We went back in for a second cup of coffee, and we decided to get some Danish pastries, too. We bought two each as a little appetizer for breakfast. We went out to the pool deck to eat the pastries and drink our coffee. We couldn't find a free table, and we definitely needed one.
       "There are a couple of seats at that table over there," Kyle said.
       "I know, but it already has people at it," I said.
       "Let's ask them if we can join them," he said.
       We walked over to the table.
       "Er, excuse me, sir. Would you mind if we sat at the table with you?" Kyle asked.
       It was a man and two teenage boys. They had on bathing suits and that was all. The boys looked like they were around sixteen or seventeen. It was hard to tell.
       "No, not at all. Please have a seat," the man said.
       He had a newspaper, and he was reading it intently. The boys both had pastries and cups of orange juice. Kyle and I were in our red shirts, of course, so they knew we were gay, if they were even aware of what was going on around them.
       "This pastry's good, isn't it?" Kyle said.
       Kyle was amazing to me in many, many ways, but one of the most amazing things about him was how he talked. If we had been at our house, or even with our guys right there, he would have said, "This pastry's good, ain't it?" And he would have said it Southern, too. When he said it just then, though, he could have just flown in from California or Colorado or whatever state doesn't have an accent at all.
       "Yes, it is," one of the boys said.
       "Where are you guys from?" Kyle asked, again, totally without an accent.
       "Atlanta," the boy said. "What about you?"
       "We're from Florida," Kyle said. "Emerald Beach. Ever hear of it?"
       "Is that around Miami," the second boy asked.
       "No, opposite direction. We're in the Panhandle. Right on the Gulf of Mexico."
       Kyle even said "gulf," instead of "guff." Amazing.
       "Cool. Are you guys, er, gay?" the first boy asked.
       "Max . . . " the man said.
       "Sorry," Max said.
       "That's all right. Yeah, we're gay," Kyle said. "We're here for Gay Days. That's why we're wearing these red shirts."
       Kyle had on a red tank top, and the many hours he had put in with the weights showed that morning. Those boys and that man noticed, too.
       "We're here for that, too," Max said.
       "Are you guys gay?" Kyle asked.
       The man put his paper down, like he was interested in what they were going to say.
       "We're here with our dads," Max said.
       Just then a guy came up to the table. He had obviously been running, and he gave the man a peck on the cheek.
       "Good run?"
       "Yeah, but this humidity is about to kill me. Let me get a shower. I'll be right back," the runner said.
       "That's my dad," the second boy said. "And he's a fag, just like you fruits."
       The man got a real pained look on his face. I put my hand on Kyle's shoulder, and, just as I suspected, he had tensed up a little.
       "Dan, we've asked you to please not use that kind of language," the man said.
       "Whatever," Dan said.
       "So, I guess you have a problem with your father being gay. What's the matter? Do you think you're gay, too? And can't admit it?" Kyle asked.
       "Fuck you, motherfucker," Dan said, and he got up from the table. "And don't you touch me, you hear? You fucking queer." He walked away.
       "Tim, let's go, Babe," Kyle said. "Thanks for the hospitality."
       He started to get up, and I, of course, followed him.
       "Don't leave, guys. Finish your breakfast," the man said. "By the way, my name is Saul, and you've already met my son, Max. Dan has a problem with homosexuality, as you probably guessed."
       "Mr. Saul, we're from the Panhandle, and if we weren't where we are right now with you here, I would have taken his ass out for what he said," Kyle said. The Emerald Beach accent was back in full, thick force.
       "I understand, son, and he might need that some day to learn that he can't bully gay boys. All I can say is, he has a problem with homosexuality," Saul said.
       "I'm sorry I said what I did, about him maybe being gay, too," Kyle said.
       "I think that's a very natural and logical conclusion to draw from how he acted," Max said. "Between us, I think he is gay."
       "Are you?" Kyle asked.
       "No, I'm not. It wouldn't matter to me if I were, but I'm just not. I'm straight. I didn't cause that, and I didn't choose that. It's just the way I am," Max said.
       "So, why did you come to Gay Days?" Kyle asked.
       "I came to have fun with my dad and Jake, his partner," Max said. "I've had a great time here, so far. Besides, I'm spending the summer with them. And so is Dan."
       "Do you and Dan get along?" I asked.
       "Yeah, we get along okay. We're not best friends, or anything, but we get along. We don't really see that much of each other, usually. I live in Dallas, and he lives in Akron, Ohio. This will be the first full summer we've been together," Max said. "He seems real angry all the time, though. That's not fun."
       All of our guys found us just then. They each had a cup of that lava-hot coffee in their hands, but we were out of ice. Kyle introduced them to Saul and Max, and then we went off to eat breakfast.
       * * *
       After we ate breakfast, we got on the shuttle to go to Islands of Adventure at Universal Studios. There were five islands, and each one was devoted to a different theme. The five were
       1. Jurassic Park
       2. Toon Lagoon
       3. Marvell Superheroes
       4. Seuss Landing
       5. The Lost Continent
       "Have you been here before?" Rick asked the group.
       "I have," Kyle said.
       "Me, too," Philip and Ryan said.
       "I've been here before, but it was several years ago. I'm sure they've added a lot," Jeff said.
       "The one I recommend we don't go to is Seuss Landing. All that is is Dr. Seuss shit. That's for little kids," Kyle said. "I had enough of the damn cat in the hat years ago. And green eggs and ham, too. That's disgusting to me."
       "That was the last book you ever read, wasn't it?" Philip asked, teasing Kyle.
       "Well, at least I've read one," Kyle said.
       Ryan wet his thumb in his mouth and touched it to Philip's forehead.
       "Ssssssss," Ryan said.
       "Yeah, he burned me good, but I'll be getting his ass before long. You hide and watch," Philip said.
       "Does it matter where we start?" Kevin asked, changing the subject.
       "Not to me," Kyle said. "Let's start with Jurassic Park."
       And so we did.
       My, God! The River Adventure was another roller coaster, and a good part of it was in the dark. Not only did you get the effects of a fantastic roller coaster, but you also got the effects of monster dinosaurs jumping out at you from the dark.
       Next we went to Toon Lagoon and rode Dudley Do-Right's Rip-Saw Falls. That was another roller-coaster, but it was through water. The same for the Incredible Hulk, another roller coaster.
       "My head is spinning," Justin said.
       "Mine, too," Walt said.
       "Well, let's take a break," Kevin said.
       We bought bottles of cold water and found a nice tree to rest under. It wasn't cool under that tree, like it would have been in the north, but at least we were out of the direct sun.
       While we were resting, we saw the guys we had met that morning. Max, Saul, and the other man were wearing red shirts. Dan had on a white tee shirt, and he was dragging behind the rest of them, like he didn't want to be seen with them.
       "That boy right there is a sad case," Kyle said, meaning Dan. "Should I go get 'em?"
       "Yeah, go get 'em," Rick said. "We might be able to cheer that boy up."
       Kyle trotted over to them. He talked to them and pointed in our direction. The two men kind of looked at each other and smiled, and they walked over to us.
       We all introduced ourselves again. Dan seemed really disgusted with the three North Carolina boys, probably because they were effeminate. The other man's name was Jacob, or Jake, as they called him. I noticed Dan checking out Justin pretty good, though. He checked out Kyle, Brian, and me, too. Tyler had on a tank top, too, just like Kyle, and he and Jeff got a going-over, also. If that boy wasn't gay, neither were any of us. I didn't say anything, of course.
       We spent the rest of the day with those guys, and we had fun. Even Dan seemed to enjoy the rides. I mean, what was there not to enjoy? The Dueling Dragons roller coaster on the Lost Continent island was unbelievable.
       "This whole damn place is designed for one thing: to make me puke," Justin said.
       "I know," Philip said. "Me too. So why do we love these rides so much?"
       "Cause you're dumb, Philip," Kyle said.
       "I ain't as dumb as you, though," Philip said.
       "I know. That's why they don't bother me. If you could get down a few more notches on the dumb scale, they wouldn't bother you, either," Kyle said.
       "I can't ever get as low as you, Kyle," Philip said.
       "I know," Kyle said. And they both laughed.
       That was the boy who was third in his class (Philip) and the boy who was one of four National Merit Finalists in his class (Kyle). Yeah, they were dumb, all right. Because they were Beach Rats, and Beach Rats were dumb, by definition, and they had the syllogisms and analogies and logical arguments to prove it.
       We were having some coffee late in the afternoon, and all of us were sitting at a big table. Actually, it was several wrought iron tables that we had pulled together. Dan had been pretty quiet when we first hooked up with him and his guys, but he had gradually started talking more.
       "Kyle, I want to apologize for how I acted this morning," Dan said.
       "Dan, you don't have to . . .," Kyle started to say.
       "Yes, I do," Dan said emphatically. "I was a prick and an asshole, and I'm sorry. You guys have been friendly to me all day, and I'm really not the kind of guy deep down like I acted this morning. Kyle, you asked me if I'm gay, and, yes, I am. Dad, I love you, but I didn't want to spend the summer in Atlanta. I have a boyfriend in Akron, or did, anyway. Mom sent me here to separate the two of us. Things have been very hard at home since I came out, and I know she wanted some peace. She and Tom, my step-father, I mean. I've been angry about that for weeks, ever since I found out I was coming to Atlanta. I'm so sorry. That's really not the kind of boy I am."
       Tears were streaming down Dan's face, and the rest of us were dead quiet.
       "Take a walk with me, please, son," Jake, his dad, said.
       The two of them got up and went to another side of the patio we were on. We saw Jake hug Dan, and Jake started crying, too.
       "Whoa," Kyle said. "That was pretty intense."
       "It was, Kyle, but you forced the moment to a crisis without even intending to. What happened just now took us all to the heart of the artichoke, so to speak. Now Dan and Jake and I can get on with life. Thank you," Saul said. "Dan's only been with us for a week, but his presence has caused some very strained moments. I think that's probably going to be behind us, now."
       "Can somebody give me a smoke, please?" Kyle asked.
       Justin tossed his pack across the table, and Kyle lit up.
       "You want one, don't you?" Kyle asked Max.
       Max got red, and he looked at his dad.
       "You're seventeen, Max. Have one, if you want to, son," Saul said. "I certainly smoked at your age."
       Max took a cigarette and lit up. That wasn't his first one, that's for sure.
       "The delegation from one of the biggest tobacco states in the country salutes you," Walt said.
       That made us all laugh.
       "I thought you were from Florida now," Kyle said. "Ain't you coming home with us?"
       "Well, not directly. I need to go home and get my stuff. But I'll be there, Kyle. For sure," Herb said.
       "You know what? This trip is working out for a lot of people," Kyle said.
       "Yeah, I know. It's because you been working double time," Justin said.
       "What the hell you mean by that?" Kyle demanded.
       "Shut up, Kyle. You know what I mean," Justin said.
       Kyle just grinned. Those of us who really knew Kyle knew exactly what Justin meant.
       Dan and Jake came back to the table just about then, and they were happy. We had long since finished our coffee and water, and we were ready for the rest of the park.

(Philip's Perspective)
       That trip to Disney and those other places for Gay Days was unbelievable, but I really don't think it had that much to do with being gay. Or having special Gay Days, or anything like that. I mean, almost everybody was just like us, and you couldn't tell if they were gay or not. Even the ones with the red shirts on. I don't really know what I expected, but what I got was the best fun with the best friends I've ever had in my life. I think we started laughing when we got in the car in Kevin and Rick's driveway in Emerald Beach, and I think we stopped laughing when we went to sleep the first night we were home.
       "What did you think of that Dan guy?" Kyle asked me.
       "I think he needs some support. Evidently, he's not getting along with his mom and step-dad. That can't be good," I said.
       "I know. Have you ever heard of Akron, Ohio?" Kyle replied.
       "No. I don't know," I said. "We'll have to look it up."
       "Yeah, I guess. I heard of Dallas, though. That's where Max lives. I think Dallas is all cowboys," Kyle said. "He sure wasn't no cowboy, was he?"
       "Are you being serious, or are you pulling my dick, Kyle?" I asked.
       "What?" he said.
       "The Dallas Cowboys is the damn football team, you dumb fuck," I said.
       I looked in those eyes, and I knew.
       "You asshole," I said. And we both laughed.
       "So I guess all the people in New Orleans ain't saints," he said.
       "You've been there. Do you think they're all saints?" I asked.
       "Grandma, Grandpa, and Cherie are. I don't think Craig is, though. I think he's a devil like us, Bubba," he said.
       "I think you're right, and we're the ones gonna have the most fun," I said.
       We both laughed.

(Kevin's Perspective)
       Gay Days in Orlando were fun, but the real fun came from the attractions, and being with people we loved. Except for the red shirts, you couldn't have told that the attractions were filled with gay people. Sure, guy couples and girl couples were holding hands, which they probably wouldn't have done under different circumstances, but, other than that, everything was the same. I think Philip was a little disappointed that he didn't have more of a "gay" experience. But, the bottom line was, he did have a "gay" experience: normal people doing normal things and having fun.
       "Where are we going to put Herb?" Kyle asked on the trip home.
       "Let's take a census of the house," Rick said. "You and Tim need a room. Brian and Justin need one. Denny needs one, and Chuck needs one. That's the second floor."
       "Paddy's going to need a room," Tim said.
       "True. That's the third floor, though. We can put Walt up there, too. We've still got that big bonus room up on three, too," Rick said.
       "That's big enough for two beds," Kevin said. "For guests. We'll need to get furniture, though."
       "Kevin, I've explored that warehouse top to bottom, and I know there are beds and mattresses and springs and such in that place. That ain't a problem, Bubba," Kyle said.
       "Oh, we'll get it furnished. I'm just a little worried about some of our guests, though," Kevin said.
       "Like who?" Kyle asked.
       "Well, like Chris," Kevin said.
       "The study room is his room, Kevin. You know that," Kyle said. "Besides, from what I understand, he's doing real good on his crutches. Don't think of Chris as, like, handicapped, Kevin. He's a little bit disabled, but he's made a huge amount of progress since we saw him last summer. Cerebral Palsy don't have to be a handicap, you know?"
       "I know, Kyle. Did you ever think you would be an activist for Cerebral Palsy?"
       "An activist? I ain't an activist," Kyle said.
       "How much money have you donated to Cerebral Palsy causes?" Kevin asked.
       "I don't know, and I don't want to know. Kevin, I do stuff for CP because I love Chris. Don't try to put a price tag on my love, man. It's going to be that way for the rest of my life. And your life, too, you dumb fuck, and you know it," Kyle said.
       I laughed.
       "Yeah, you're probably right, Kyle. Our lives together, man," I said.
       * * *
       We got home from the Gay Days trip on Monday afternoon. The dogs had stayed home with Denny and Chuck, and you would have thought Jesus had raised us from the dead to see them. They were so excited when we got home.
       Brian spent time with Trixie first, and they reassured one another that he was home. Krewe was really cute, though. She wanted Brian's attention, but she wanted the attention of the rest of us, too. She was all over Brian, but she was also all over the rest of us, too.
       "You've got summer school tomorrow, ain't you?" Kyle asked.
       "Yeah. It actually started today," Brian said. "I missed the first day. I can only miss one more day. More than that, and I'm out."
       "Brian, if we have to, we'll wait for you," Tim said. "Don't stress about this, Bubba."
       "You won't have to wait for me," Brian said. "I'll make it."
       * * *
       Brian started summer school the next day, and the other boys started their summer jobs at the hotel. Summer school lasted until noon, and then Brian went to work at Mack Mixon's place, working with dogs. Brian was probably going to come out the real winner in terms of earnings that summer, and he deserved it. Brian was a pure joy to us, and everybody loved him. I had never seen him have a cross word with anybody, and more and more I thought he was the brains of the Big Four. He was the youngest one of them, but he was the guy with the ideas.
       Kyle had his crab traps going, as he had the summer before, and he probably could have turned that into a business. His ancestors had started out in Emerald Beach as fishermen, and he could have reverted to that in a heartbeat, if he had wanted to. He certainly had the skill to do it, and he had the luck, too.
       "Looka here," he said one day, when we came home from work. "You see those things? Do you know what they are?"
       He held up a glass with what looked like sea water. It was a little cloudy, but there were obviously creatures in it.
       "Let me get a good look," Rick said.
       He held the jar up to look at it.
       "Seahorses?" Rick asked.
       "Exactly. Have you ever seen those before?" Kyle asked.
       "Not live ones," Rick said. "Where the hell did you get these things?"
       "I caught them in my cast net today," he said. "They're cute, ain't they?"
       There were eight or ten little seahorses in that jar. I had never seen anything like that before, and I was fascinated. They ranged in size from a half inch to about two inches.
       "I've never heard of anybody eating them, and they're pretty small, anyway," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, these are beautiful," I said. "Look how graceful they are." They truly were magnificent in miniature.
       "I know. They're playful little things, too. Look at 'em just playing," he said.
       "How did you catch these things?" I asked.
       "I just threw my net over the side of the boat, and there they were. I knew what to look for, and I found them. Most people don't even know they're there, but they are cute, aren't they?" he said.
       "What are you going to do with them?" I asked.
       "I'm going to turn 'em loose in the water. I just wanted y'all to see 'em," he said.
       "Have you ever caught a big one?" Rick asked.
       "No, sir, but they catch big ones in shrimp nets all the time. When I say 'big,' I mean, like, six or eight inches tall. Did you know the males are the ones who have the babies?" he asked.
       "Really?" Rick asked.
       "Yes, sir. That's what I've heard," he said. "I think the males have some kind of pouch or something, and the females lay the eggs into it. I don't know the details, but that's what I've heard."
       "I can't believe you caught something you can't eat," Justin said.
       "Yeah? I just caught me a shrimp I can't eat," Kyle said.
       He grabbed Justin's penis through his pants.
       "Give it a break, Kyle," Justin said.
       "I think the shrimp is turning into a mullet," Kyle said.
       "Goddamn it, Kyle. Leave me alone, you little pervert," Justin said.
       He and Kyle both laughed hard.
       "When are you guys going to grow up?" Rick asked.
       "When you do," Justin said.
       "Oh, so never, huh?"
       More laughter.
       When we had finished having fun, Kyle released the seahorses into the lagoon behind our house. That was where he had caught them, and that's where they went home. Seeing those things was pretty interesting, though.
       * * *
       Paddy Ryan was flying in on Tuesday night, the day after we got home from Gay Days. Tim was very excited about his cousin coming to spend the summer with us, and George Murphy was, too. In fact, George and Sonya went to the airport with us to meet his plane. He was due in at 7:10, and we were all there when he arrived.
       He walked in looking pretty flagged out from the trip. He had two carry-on pieces of luggage, and there was a big suitcase that he had checked.
       There was much hugging and kissing and hand shaking when he got to where we were, just beyond the gate. If that boy didn't feel welcome, I didn't know what else to do. He was grinning and laughing, like he had come home to his family.
       "I expected Tim and George to be here. I didn't know all of you were going to be here," he said.
       "We're all here because we're happy you're here," Kyle said. "All George wants to do is get at them teeth of yours. To see how many he can pull out."
       We all laughed, and George actually grabbed Kyle up in a big hug.
       "You little shit," George said, laughing.
       "Is that how my father-in-law is going to think of me the rest of my life?" Kyle asked.
       "If you mean he's going to think of you as his son, Kyle, then, yes," Sonya said. "Our son. But I can probably do more for his teeth than George can."
       Paddy actually had great teeth, and I'm sure his parents had paid dearly for them.
       Paddy hadn't eaten for quite awhile, and we hadn't had dinner, either. We took him to the Pelican's Post, our usual bar and grill place. We all got a good dinner. That place was totally reliable.
       "So, when do I start work," Paddy asked.
       "Tomorrow," I said. "Are you ready to start that soon?"
       "Yeah, I'm ready," he said.
       "Kyle, can you fix him up with a uniform?" Kevin asked.
       "Yeah, but he ain't wearing it to the orientation. He can put it on when the orientation is done," Kyle said. "Nobody else there is going to be in uniform, and he doesn't want to stand out. Trust me."
       "Okay, but you take care of him, you hear me?" I said.
       "Yes, sir. You know I will," Kyle said.
       "Yeah, I do," I said.
       We had a good time that night, just talking and playing with the dogs and eating ice cream. George and Sonya went home in about an hour, before ice cream, even, and we had us a new gay boy to nurture.
       "Are there any rules I should know about?" Paddy asked.
       We went over the simple house rules we observed. We told him about our rules about sex, and he seemed pretty embarrassed and self-conscious about that.
       "I doubt that sex will be an issue for me," Paddy said.
       "Yeah, but you never can tell," Kyle said. "You could meet a boy tomorrow, fall madly in love, and need a king-size pack of condoms tomorrow night."
       Paddy blushed.
       "Well, if that happens, it'll be a miracle," he said.
       * * *
       Paddy went to work the next day, and he quickly settled into the routine of the house. He was a charming young man, and it was obvious the other kids, and Rick and I, as well, genuinely liked him.
       We had expected Herb from North Carolina to come down to stay with us and work, but that fell through. He called to say he had met a boy right after he had gotten home from Orlando and that he wanted to hang around North Carolina to see what might develop.
       "I really appreciate the fact that you all were going to let me live there, and all, but I guess I'm not really ready to leave the mountains just yet," he said.
       "That's perfectly understandable," I said. "Stay in touch, you hear?"
       He said he would, but that was a big question mark in my mind. We'd see.
       When I broke the news to the rest of the family, they seemed mildly disappointed, but not terribly so. Herb was a nice-enough guy, and I figured he'd fit in okay, but such was not to be.
       Shortly after Herb's announcement, Chuck asked to see Rick and me at work.
       "Is this personal or professional?" I asked, once we were settled in my office.
       "Personal," Chuck said. "I love my job, Kevin, and I've already made a couple of sales."
       "I know. Jack Rooney told me. He really likes you, Chuck. He told me he thinks you're a natural salesman," I said.
       "I hate to be this way, but I've got a meeting in about twenty minutes," Rick said.
       "Oh, yeah. Sorry," Chuck said. "Here's the deal. You guys know I've been dating Tony for a few months now. Well, he and I would like to take the relationship to the next level."
       "Is this, like, sex advice you're wanting?" Rick asked.
       Chuck thought he was serious for a second, but then Rick grinned. We all laughed.
       "No. We've got that well under control. We'd like to live together. Jeff and Tyler have offered us a room at their place, and we want to do that," Chuck said.
       "Congratulations, Chuck," I said. "From what I've seen of him, Tony seems like a great guy. I hope the two of you will be happy together."
       "Absolutely," Rick said. "Kevin and I were your age when we started living together, and you see what it's done for us."
       "Yes, I do, and that's what I hope Tony and I can have," he said. "Seeing you guys has made us know that we can be happy together. You and all your friends, too, and the other boys. We want to be like you guys."
       "That's pretty flattering," I said.
       "Yeah, but it's true, Kev. We both love you guys, and I'll be grateful to you for the rest of my life for giving me a place to live after Mom died. I still miss her terribly, but I don't know if I would be this far along in my own life if it hadn't happened the way it did," Chuck said.
       "Well, we know how awful it was for you, but we're glad something good has come out of it all," Rick said. "When are you planning on moving?"
       "Saturday, if that's all right with you," he said.
       "Sure. Just know you're going to be missed, Chuck. But it won't be like you're moving away, or anything. You'll always be a part of our family, and you'll always be welcome in our house," I said.
       "Thank you, Kevin, and thank you, Rick. I feel so good right now," Chuck said.
       And thus it was that the Foley-Mashburn clan sent another of its own into the world, ready for life. Justin and Kyle helped Chuck move his things to the townhouse, and Tim and Brian and Denny helped Tony move. Jeff and Tyler supervised the arrival of their two new roommates, and we concluded the afternoon in our pool on North Lagoon Drive. We went to Mass, as we usually did on Saturday, and we had dinner together at the Pelican's Post as usual, as well. The summer was moving along nicely.

Chapter 06

(Justin's Perspective)
       Going to Disney World for Gay Days was one of the best things we had ever done. We had done a lot of cool stuff, don't get me wrong, but I felt just like a little kid at Disney World.
       "I know that's Mickey Mouse, but who's that other one?" I asked Brian.
       "That's Goofy. Do you not know the Disney characters, Buddy?"
       "Not most of 'em. I didn't really have a regular childhood, you know, Bri? That's why I am the way I am, I guess," I said.
       "How do you think you are?" he asked me.
       "I don't know. Sort of fucked up, I reckon. There's just a lot of gaps in what I know," I said.
       "Justin, you know that I love you, don't you? You know I would never lie to you, don't you?" Brian said.
       I didn't have any idea where that was going, and it sort of scared me a little bit.
       "Yeah, I know both of those things," I said.
       "So you're going to have to believe me, okay?" he said.
       "Okay," I said, still scared.
       "You are not fucked up in any way. Don't ever think that about yourself again, and I mean it," he said.
       His voice had that "and I mean business" sound to it. The way he said that was about the cutest he'd ever been, and it made me laugh.
       "You don't think I'm fucked up?"
       "Well, maybe a little bit," he said. Now he was teasing me.
       "Well, which is it? You told me you'd never lie to me. Am I fucked up or not?" I asked.
       "Come here, Buddy. It's okay to do this here." Then he planted a big kiss on my mouth. We didn't get into the tongue thing or any of that, though. "That's how fucked up you are," he said. "And even if you were fucked up, I'd still love you."
       That made me feel so good, I was about to bust.
       "You realize, I've just said the word fuck more times in this conversation than I have in the whole rest of my life put together, don't you?" Brian said.
       That was pretty damn cute, too.
       "I know. You're turning into a damn potty mouth," I said.
       We both laughed. Then I got serious.
       "Bri, you almost never say any cuss words. Why is that?" I asked.
       "I don't feel comfortable using that kind of language, Buddy," he said.
       "Does it bother you when I do, or when the others do?" I asked.
       "Not a bit," he said. "In fact, sometimes it's kind of a turn-on."
       "You mean, like, it gives you an erection?" I asked. I found that hard to believe.
       "No, not that. I get them sometimes, but that's just normal," he said. "I guess it's just sort of rough and masculine to me. You and Kyle are very masculine men. I don't think Tim and I are as masculine as you and Kyle."
       "What?! There's nothing feminine about either one of you guys. Brian, I couldn't go for you if you were feminine, man. That's just a fact. What makes you say that about you and Tim?"
       I was just a little bit pissed off at him and the way he thought of himself. He was the finest human being I ever knew in my life, and I resented him saying that about himself because I thought it was a put-down.
       "Now don't get annoyed. I'm not putting myself down. But I know myself, Jus. Everybody has masculine and feminine qualities, and that's the way it's supposed to be. I think Tim and I have more feminine qualities than you and Kyle do, that's all," he said.
       "Like what?"
       "Well, I think we're more intuitive than you guys are," he said.
       "What does that mean?"
       "It means we sense how people are feeling quicker than you and Kyle do," he said.
       "Well, that's true. You guys do that, for sure," I said. "What else?"
       "I think we're gentler and less interested in roughhousing than you guys," he said.
       "That roughhouse stuff is strictly Kyle, not me," I said.
       "Justin?! What?! You'll roughhouse in a second. What are you talking about? Have you ever heard Tim or me offer to whip each other's ass out in the yard? I know that's just talk, but the fact that you think about it, and would do it if you pissed each other off enough, is proof of what I'm saying," he said.
       "I'd like to see you and Tim square off," I said. He knew I was teasing him, though.
       He laughed.
       "If Tim and I ever had a real fight, you and Kyle would go crazy and probably kill each other," he said. "But that's the kind of thing I'm talking about. That's what I mean when I say Tim and I have more feminine qualities than you and Kyle."
       "Have you talked about this with Tim and Kyle?" I asked.
       "With Tim, yeah. Not with Kyle, though. Kyle and I got really close working on his book. That was the first major thing I ever did with just him, and it was a wonderful bonding experience for both of us. But he and I don't talk about stuff like this," he said.
       "I know. I don't talk to him about stuff like this, either. In fact, I don't talk to anybody but you about it," I said. "So tell me this. Who lives in that big castle?"
       "What are you talking about?" he asked.
       "That thing right there," I said, pointing to the castle. "Who lives there? Or used to live there?"
       "Oh, that's Cinderella's Castle," he said.
       "I don't know who that is," I said. "Is that one of those things everybody in the world knows about but me?"
       "I don't know about everybody in the world, but it's pretty common knowledge," he said. "You know what? When we get home, I'm going to put you on a reading program. There really are a lot of gaps in what you know, but we're going to take care of that. If you want to, that is."
       "Yeah, I want to. But let's don't tell the others, okay? I don't want Kyle and Rick ragging my butt about that, okay?" I said.
       He gave me about the sweetest smile I had ever seen in my life.
       "It'll just be us," he said. "Me and my man."
       "Brian, I love you so much I'm about to pop right now," I said.
       "And I love you that much, too. We're building a partnership that has to last a lifetime, you know? I've got a stake in this, too, Buddy," he said.
       "I love it when you say stuff like that, Brian," I said. "Cause that's exactly how I feel about it, too."
       "I know," he said.
       * * *
       We met up with these three boys from North Carolina in Disney World. Everything you could have going against you, they had. They were fat, they were gay, and they were effeminate. But, once you got past all that, they were just as nice and as likeable as they could be. I knew they were probably the type that got picked on at school, and before I came to Emerald Beach, I probably would have done the picking, had I been there. That was one thing they had taught me, though. You don't judge people. You just accept them and be friends.
       The thing was, it had been two years to the day that they had found me in that motel. I know my birthday is July 4th, or so my birth certificate says, if you can believe that. But that day in June they found me was my real birthday. That was the day I started my real life, and couldn't nobody tell me different. That's what we were all crying about when that Herb boy came up to us.
       "You can't cry in the Magic Kingdom," he said.
       Oh, yes, you can, I thought. When you're as happy as I am, you cry if you want to. And this is the perfect place to do it.
       Those boys knew the ones in North Carolina who have the flower shop. That is so damn typical of us. Here we are, hundreds of miles from home, and we run into people who know people we know. And they were even farther away from home than we were. That never stops amazing me, how we can do that.
       Before we know it, Herb and Walt and Cameron are going to spend the night with us. Then, Herb's going to come live with us. Those boys were eighteen or nineteen at the most, and they needed help. Who do you call when you need help? Kevin Foley and Rick Mashburn. Who else?
       The next day, though, we met this little prick named Dan. We met his daddy and his daddy's partner, too, and this other straight boy named Max, who was wearing a red shirt just like the rest of us. Dan wouldn't wear one because he didn't want the people there to think he was gay. Like they cared. Turns out, Dan is as queer as a three-dollar bill, but he's pissed off because his mama and step-daddy made him come live in Atlanta with his real daddy to bust him up with his boyfriend.
       Don't get me wrong. I would have been supremely pissed off if somebody had done me that way, but you don't turn into a prick who hates gay people because you're pissed off at your mama. That doesn't make any sense to me, especially if you're gay yourself. If anybody had a right to be pissed off, it was Max. He wasn't gay, but he didn't give a shit if everybody in that place thought he was. Not him. He wanted to fit in and show Gay Pride, even though he ain't gay. He was having a great time, and he knew nobody was going to force him to give them a blowjob or something. He was level-headed, I thought.
       Kyle had told me to watch Dan close because of what had happened that morning at the pool. That boy was lucky that man had been there that morning. Otherwise, Dan might be wearing those teeth on a necklace, instead of in his mouth, if Kyle had had his way with him.
       Then we have this big coming out thing while we're taking a break. Dan and his daddy go off to patch it up or something. I don't know. Meanwhile, Max is dying for a smoke, and that's a little mini-drama in itself because evidently he hadn't been smoking in front of his daddy. Jesus!
       Anyway, we finally got everything all worked out. But that was just another one of our family traits. We work it all out in the end.

(Rick's Perspective)
       "Damn, would you keep still," I said to Kyle on the Friday night before Chris and David were getting there the next day.
       "I can't help it," he said.
       He had been pumping his foot as fast as he could, and it was shaking the sofa. We were in the den watching the Braves on TV.
       I put my hand on his left thigh. I was sitting next to him.
       "Stop it," I said.
       "I'm sorry," he said.
       He knew that was annoying, but he really wasn't aware he was doing it. He'd stop for a few minutes when I did something like put my hand on him, but he'd start again without realizing it just as soon as I turned him loose.
       "This game is boring the piss out of me," he said. "I can't concentrate on it. Who wants to do something?"
       Kyle and I were the only ones watching the game. The rest of them were in there, but they were all reading. Jeff, Ty, Chuck, and Tony were home at their townhouse or out or something, and it was just the Big Four, Kevin and I, Denny, and Paddy at home. Chip usually spent Friday night at our house, but he had a date that night.
       Nobody said anything when he asked who wanted to do something.
       "So what is this? Ignore Kyle Night?" he asked.
       "Jesus, Kyle. You're getting on my nerves," I said.
       "Y'all take it outside. I'm selling tickets," Justin said.
       That made us laugh.
       "Look at that," he said. "That's a double play. No! Damn, that's a triple play."
       "I thought the game was boring the piss out of you," I said.
       "It was. It's not any more, though," he said.
       I put my hand back on his thigh because he had started up again.
       "I'm going for a swim," Kyle said. "I've got too much energy tonight."
       He got up and went outside. He stripped off and dove in. I could see him through the French doors that led from the den to the patio and pool. He dove in at the shallow end, but it was a flat dive, not one that was dangerous. I noticed he held his nuts when he did it, too.
       Despite the triple play, the game really was very, very dull. I decided to join Kyle in the pool. His face lit up like a Christmas tree when he saw me come out there.
       "That game is boring, isn't it?" he said.
       "It's the top of the seventh and still no score. I'd say it's pretty boring," I said.
       "Thanks for coming out here with me," he said.
       "That's okay, Bubba. I was going to sleep in there, anyway, once the gyrations of the couch stopped," I said.
       "See, that was keeping you awake," he said. "I was just trying to help you out."
       "Why are you so hyper tonight?" I asked.
       "Why do you think? My little boy's coming home tomorrow, that's why," he said, grinning.
       "Your little boy?"
       "I know he's not a little boy, but that's the way I think of Chris," he said.
       "You really love him, don't you?" I asked.
       "Do you have to ask that question?" he asked.
       "No, not really. I know you do. What are you going to do if your little boy isn't a little boy anymore, Kyle? He's made a lot of progress in a year, you know? He's had the surgery and all. Is that going to change anything?" I asked.
       "I've thought a lot about that. He and I write to each other every week, at least. Usually a couple of times. I know he's grown, and I know he's put on a whole lot of weight. Muscle weight. He's worked really hard at PT, and it's paying off. He doesn't take speech therapy anymore. Did you know that?"
       "No, I didn't," I said.
       "That's right. His speech is just as clear as mine now. When I talk to him on the phone, I never have to ask him to repeat himself anymore," he said.
       "That's wonderful," I said. "His speech was never really all that hard to understand before, though."
       "I know, in person. But did you ever talk to him on the phone? When he first went up there, he was hard to understand on the phone because you couldn't see his mouth. Now, like I said, he talks as plain as me," he said.
       "I don't think you talk all that plain, Mr. Guff of Mexico, where you play goff when the woofs aren't out to eat the goff balls," I said. "Then you come home and ball up some shrimp, and put plenty of olive all on the salad."
       He laughed.
       "That's just my accent. That's the way we talk in Emerald Beach," he said.
       "I know. I'm just teasing you, Kyle. I told one of the clerks the other day that I needed some pens, and she brought me a whole string of safety pins," I said.
       "Which ones did you need? Ink pins or safety pins?" he asked.
       I laughed.
       "Don't laugh at our talk, Bubba. You sound like a Yankee to me," he said.
       "I know, but back to Chris. Are you going to be ready if he doesn't need your help anymore, like he used to?" I asked.
       He got pretty pensive just then. I could tell that was something he had thought about, and I also knew it was something he wasn't yet totally comfortable with.
       "I know he won't, Rick, but he's still going to be my brother, isn't he?" Kyle asked.
       "From what I can tell, he'll be your brother for the rest of your life, but he won't be your little boy, Kyle," I said.
       "Yeah, but isn't that what growing up is all about?" he asked.
       "That's what I wanted to hear, Kyle. I think you're ready for the 'new Chris,' whatever form that is going to take, man," I said.
       * * *
       The next afternoon we were all at the airport when Chris Uhle and his brother David landed. The plane was one of the smaller ones that came in from Atlanta, so the passengers had to climb down the ladder onto the runway to come into the terminal. We were all standing at the plate-glass wall watching, and David came down first. There were several more people, and then Chris emerged from the plane.
       He took the steps down one at a time, and he was using crutches. When he got on the tarmac, we all tapped on the window for him to see us. When he saw us, he threw his crutches ten feet in front of himself and burst out into the biggest grin I had ever seen on him. The flight attendants, or whoever the people were who were helping the passengers off the plane, must have thought he had fallen or something, and they jumped alive.
       "Jesus Christ," Kyle said.
       "It's a miracle! He's been healed!" Justin said.
       We laughed at Justin.
       The boys who knew Chris were in tears, as were Kevin and I. Chris had on shorts, so we could see the brace on his right leg. He limped a little, but he damn sure walked across that runway under his own power.
       David picked up the crutches, which looked like they must have cost a small fortune. He handed them to Chris.
       "Use the crutches," David said. It was easy to read his lips.
       "No. You carry them," Chris said.
       Chris was grinning so big I thought his mouth would split open, and David was grinning, too, proud of his brother. God, what a wonderful sight!
       We formed a kind of receiving line in the terminal. David and Chris hugged Kevin and me. We introduced them to the ones they didn't already know, and then they proceeded down the line. Kyle was at the end.
       It was a pretty emotional welcome for all of the Big Four, but Kyle and Chris absolutely lost it.
       "I can't pick you up anymore," Kyle said.
       "Yes, you can, but don't, okay?" Chris said.
       "I know," Kyle said, laughing.
       They hugged long and hard, grinning and laughing. It was a joy to see those two boys reunited.
       "Where are your sticks?" Kyle asked.
       "Dave has 'em. I only brought 'em because I needed 'em in Atlanta. We had to haul ass across that damn airport, but I haven't used them regularly in over three months," Chris said. "I haven't sat in a wheelchair in six months. I can't wait to drive your new car, by the way."
       "Well, you don't have long to wait. You're driving us home," Kyle said.
       "My God, it feels so good to be here," Chris said. "I'm home with my bubbas."
       * * *
       When we got home, we congregated in the den, of course. Kyle had put together quite a spread for us, and he brought it out, with the help of Tim, Justin, and Brian.
       "Did you make all of this?" Chris asked.
       "Yeah, of course I did. We knew you were coming," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, you're Mr. Party," Chris said.
       "That's my name. Don't wear it out," Kyle said.
       There had been a lot of joy and happiness in that room over the year-and-a-half that we had lived there, but I don't think any of it equaled the joy and happiness we knew that afternoon.
       "I don't want my room to be on the first floor," Chris said. "Second floor, if there's a vacancy, third floor if there isn't."
       "What?" Justin asked.
       "You heard me. I've been working on climbing stairs for four damn months, and I want to be up there with you guys," Chris said.
       "I can't believe how much you've changed in a year," Kyle said. "You must be a good six inches taller."
       "Seven inches, actually, and forty pounds heavier, all muscle. And that isn't all that's grown," he said. He gave us a sly look.
       We laughed.
       "Kyle, when the physical therapy hurt so bad I couldn't stand it, I thought of you and Tim and Justin and Brian, and of my promise to march down the street with you guys, arm in arm. That was my motivation and the source of my energy," he said.
       "Chris, the transformation is unbelievable," Jeff said.
       "Well, I've got some more to do," Chris said. "But I don't need a towel anymore to eat."
       "I can tell that from the way you're eating here. When was the last time you ate, by the way? Do I need to go cook up a steer?" Kyle asked.
       We all laughed.
       "I know I've been eating quite a bit, but they didn't give us any food on the plane. Delta is ready to starve you when you are," he said.
       We all laughed again.
       "And what's up with the ASA we flew in on from Atlanta?" Chris asked.
       "That stands for 'Always Something' Airlines," Jeff said.
       That made us laugh, too.
       "So, Chris, you know we swim a good bit here," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, you won't believe me in the water," he said.
       "Let's go in," Kevin said.
       Trixie and Krewe were very interested in our newcomers. Chris was too busy to be much interested in the dogs, but David wasn't.
       I saw the whole thing working out. Kyle, Justin, and Paddy were going to attend to Chris, and Tim, Brian, and Denny were going to attend to David.
       "Hi, Dave," I said. "How're you doing, buddy?"
       "I'm doing great, thanks. This is Chris's trip, but I'm just happy to be here," he said.
       "No, this is your trip, too, Dave. Is this the first time you've ever been around a houseful of gay guys?" I asked.
       "Yes," he said. "Except for when you guys visited us last summer."
       "Well, we want you to have a good time, and you tell me if you aren't having a good time, okay?" I said.
       "Yes, sir, I will. You are the only gay people I know," he said. "I think just being here is going to be a good time."
       "I hope so, but you tell me if you want to do something that the other ones don't want to do. I'll do it with you, okay?" I said.
       He grinned. "Yes, sir, I will."
       * * *
       "Rick, Dave wants to work with me with the dogs," Brian said.
       "That's good, Bri," I said.
       That was actually a God-send because I didn't really know what I was going to do with him. I mean, I could have put him to work at a gift shop for two weeks, but he was fairly young to do that alone. Kevin could have put him where Denny was working, but we didn't really need another pool boy there.
       "Is Mr. Mack going to pay him, Bri," I asked.
       "He'll get paid," Brian said.
       "Okay," I said. I figured whatever money Dave made would come from Brian.
       We all went out to the patio and started stripping off. I had my eye on Dave to see if he would be self-conscious about getting nude with the rest of us. He was a damn nice kid, and I sure didn't want him to be embarrassed around some of the elephant dicks in our family. Of course, some guys were modestly endowed, but Kyle, Justin, and Brian would probably intimidate a little fellow like Dave.
       "What the hell happened to this thing?" Justin said, grabbing Chris's penis.
       Chris was laughing his ass off, of course, and everybody else was, too.
       "I told you it grew," Chris said. "And if you don't turn it loose, it's going to grow some more, asshole."
       Justin took his hand away like he had been touching fire, and Chris laughed some more.
       "Goddamn! Look at this," Jus said, indicating Chris's muscles. He was nowhere close to Justin's size, of course, but you could actually see muscle on his body.
       Chris pumped his left bicep into a muscle, and Justin had to feel it.
       "Damn, Bubba. I don't want to fight you," Jus said.
       "The right one isn't as good, yet, but I'll get it there," Chris said.
       "Can you say, 'self-esteem team?'" Kevin asked me in a whisper.
       "I know, but are you surprised?" I asked.
       "Nope, and I also can't get over the difference in Chris from last summer," he said.
       Chris took the brace off his right leg. He could walk without it, but he didn't seem to be nearly as stable once it was off. He limped more, too.
       "Do you remember the first time you went into this pool?" Kyle asked Chris.
       "I sure do," Chris said.
       "Well, we're going in the same way we did then," Kyle said.
       He reached down behind Chris's knees and picked him up.
       "You're heavy, boy," Kyle said, and Chris laughed.
       Kyle walked over to the side of the pool and jumped in. He and Chris went underwater, of course, and Kyle held him down there a good long time. Kevin and I looked at one another, a shadow of worry on our faces. They popped up just then, both laughing their asses off.
       "Toss me to Justin," Chris screamed.
       "I don't know if I can in this deep water. You're man-size now. I don't know if I can do it," Kyle said.
       "Try it," Chris said.
       "All right. Hold your breath," Kyle said.
       It was quite an effort for Kyle to hoist him out of the water, especially since Kyle's feet weren't touching the bottom of the pool. He did it, though, and he tossed Chris to Jus.
       Justin caught him and wanted to toss him to Brian.
       "Chris, don't drown, if I can't catch you," Brian said.
       "I can swim," Chris said. "I swim three or four times a week as part of my therapy."
       "Okay," Bri said.
       They kept that up for a while, and, of course, Tim got into the act, too. The laughter coming out of that pool was contagious.
       Of course, the dogs were in the water with the kids, and Dave and Denny were playing with them. Brian had taught Trixie a game wherein she would nudge a kid, swim away fast, and then bark so the kid would go after her. Denny knew that game, and the three of them played it. Krewe was learning it, only she wasn't as adept at getting away from the boys as Trixie was.
       "I want to show you something," Chris said. "We have to get out, though."
       Everybody got out of the pool. He walked over to a basketball that had been left out, picked it up, dribbled it a few times, and took a shot. He missed.
       "Shit," he said.
       He got the ball back, dribbled it again, and shot again. That time it went in.
       We all cheered.
       "Do you remember me trying to play from my chair?" Chris asked.
       "Yeah, I do," Jus said. "I could piss higher than you could throw it."
       We all laughed at that, but Chris really laughed hard. I suddenly remembered his "bathroom bonding" with Justin, and I realized those two had a thing for bathroom humor.
       "Let's play a game," Kyle said.
       "I don't think I'm ready for a game," Chris said.
       "Not basketball. Let's play HORSE," Kyle said. "You've got a good arm on you. You can be competitive."
       "How do you play it?" Chris asked.
       "You shoot from five positions around the keyhole. If you miss, you get a letter of the word 'horse' for each miss. The first one who gets 'horse' is out," Kyle said. "The last one in, wins."
       "I want to play," Paddy said. "I play that all the time at home. We play it a little bit different, but it's the same idea. Do you have to match the first guy's shot?"
       "Yeah, we usually do, but today it's just going to be a shot," Kyle said.
       "Play it like you usually play it," Chris said.
       "No. Do you know how to do a jump shot? A hook shot?" he asked.
       "I've never done those," Chris said.
       "I didn't think so. That's why we're doing it the way I said," Kyle said. "Next year we'll play it by those other rules. You'll be ready for that by then."
       Chris put his shoes and his brace back on, and he and Kyle, Justin, Paddy, Jeff, and Tyler played "horse," all naked. Tim, Brian, Denny, Dave, and the dogs got back in the pool. Chuck, Tony, Kevin, and I sat on the side, talking and watching.
       "Who are these guys?" Tony asked.
       "Chris was a foster placement here a year ago last May," Kevin said. "Dave is his brother. Half-brother, really. They live in Montana. Chris stole our hearts, Tony. We all went to see him and his family last summer."
       "They seem to be making a lot over his physique and physical skills. He's not all that much, though. Why does he limp?" Tony asked.
       "Chris was born with cerebral palsy, and, when he was here before, he was in a wheelchair and could barely feed himself. The boys had to bathe him and take care of him in the bathroom. They're making so much over the physical stuff because the transformation has been so remarkable," Kevin said.
       "Oh, wow!" Tony said.
       "I've heard y'all talking about Chris, but I didn't know any of that," Chuck said.
       "Kyle and Justin got him laid for the first time last summer when we were out there. They'll do anything for Chris," I said.
       "Really? Is he gay?" Tony asked.
       "No, he's straight. I don't know the details of that whole thing, but I know they didn't hire a hooker. I'm sure a bellman was involved in some way, but the girl liked Chris well enough that they had a second date the next night," I said. "He's got a girlfriend now. A different girl."
       "People I've known with cerebral palsy have been a lot more crippled than he is," Chuck said.
       "I know, and he was, too, when he was here. He hadn't gotten the right kind, or the right amount, of therapy when he was in Florida. His mom was depending on the school system to do it, and they did the best they could, I guess. His dad is a professor of computer science at the University of Montana, and he has some kind of connection with the Physical Therapy Department, or something. They found out that Chris wasn't nearly as bad off as the doctor here had thought, and he's just basically worked his ass off in therapy. Physical therapy, occupational therapy, and speech therapy. Although, he's finished the speech therapy now, apparently," Kevin said.
       "That's amazing," Chuck said.
       "Yeah, it is, but it's taken a whole lot of work on his part. More than any of us have ever done, probably. He's been going to school half a day and taking therapy the other half of the day. Really, more than half. I talked to his dad about him coming down here, and he told me Chris is thought of as a prodigy at the university," Kevin said.
       "Did you hear him say our boys have been his inspiration?" I said.
       "Yeah. I got tears in my eyes when he said that, too, Babe," Kevin said.
       "Me, too," I said. "Well, if loving somebody is what it takes, nobody could be more loved by anybody than Chris Uhle is."
       "Dave's a cute kid, too," Chuck said.
       "Yeah, he is. He and Brian and Tim really hit it off last summer. Dave is gay or bisexual or something. He's fourteen, maybe fifteen by now, but he seems younger than the rest of them. He and Denny seem to be about the same, and Danny's fifteen," I said.
       "Denny's fifteen?" Tony asked.
       "Yeah. Brian's only sixteen, but there's a really big difference between them, isn't there?" I said.
       "That's amazing," Tony said.
       "Brian's basically an adult, and Denny's basically still a child," Kevin said. "Babe, have you noticed how much Brian has blossomed?"
       "Yes, I have, and you're right. Kyle and Justin are so 'in your face' all the time that you tend to lose track of Brian and Tim. I'm beginning to believe that Brian is actually the brains of that outfit," I said.
       "I know. I've seen that over and over again. But he'll defer to Kyle and Justin every time, if there's a conflict," Kevin said. "We're boring y'all to death, I know, talking about our kids."
       "Not at all, Kevin. We're learning from you guys," Chuck said. "One of these days we might find ourselves in the same kind of situation."
       "Chuck, if you do, you won't be sorry. I guarantee that. Kevin and I were very happy together before the boys came along. But you know what? We were both pretty self-centered. I mean, all I cared about was him and triathlon, and not always in that order. Once we took in Tim, everything changed. There was a real tangible purpose in our lives, don't you think, Babe?" I said.
       "Absolutely," Kevin said. "But you have to know, we've had only the cream of the crop of kids. I don't think it's always as much fun as it has been for us. Or as easy."
       "As it's worked out, they have been the cream of the crop, but they weren't always that way," I said.
       "True," Kevin said. "Justin, Brian, and Denny were all potential power kegs. Even Tim was a potential powder keg, although he came from a very different background than the others did. Kyle has never really been our foster son. He's just been an honorary one, and he hasn't had any of the adverse things the other have."
       "I don't know, Babe. We helped him through Clay's death and Jeff's coming to live with us. That was very much a potential powder keg, I think," I said.
       "Well, our boys are turning out great," Kevin said.
       The boys who had been in the pool got out just then, and they, and the dogs, came up to the table where we were sitting. We had brought out the snacks Kyle had made, and they all dove in. The dogs had thoughtfully waited until they were up by us to shake off, so we were drenched with showers.
       "GODDAMN IT! SHIT! FUCK!" Chris screamed from the basketball area.
       "He must have lost," Dave said.
       We all laughed.
       They came over, and all of them stayed nude, too. They dug into the snacks.
       "Who won?" I asked.
       They all looked at Justin. He took a cigarette out of the pack that was on the table and lit up. Then he grinned.
       "Justin?" I asked.
       "Yup," he said.
       "That's the way to end every sports event, Justin. Light up a cigarette. That's what all the pro athletes do. Hell, that's what I used to do when I finished a big race. Get that smoke in your lungs, Bubba," I said.
       "Fuck you," Justin said, and we all laughed.
       "So what's for dinner, Kevin? What'd you buy?" Kyle asked.
       "Was I in charge of that?" Kevin asked.
       "Hell, no. You haven't bought a potato or a grain of rice in your life. Shit," Kyle said. "Kevin is the executive type, you know? He gives orders. Lets somebody else do it."
       "Yeah, and I'm the executive type, too," I said. "Get your ass in the kitchen and make dinner. Right now."
       "Okay, I'll do it, but it's mostly made. You get your ass in that clubhouse and make some drinks. These people are wanting whiskey, and I am, too. Y'all come with me," Kyle said.
       Justin, Tim, and Brian got up to follow Kyle.
       "You, too, Denny. You're part of this family, like everybody else," Kyle said.
       Denny beamed when he said that.
       "Who wants a drink?" I asked.
       I knew that Jeff, Tyler, Chuck, Tony, Paddy, and Kevin would all have a drink. I knew Kyle and Justin wanted one, too. Chris was a wildcard.
       "Do you want one, Chris?" I asked.
       "Yeah, if that's all right," he said.
       "I wouldn't have offered you one if it wasn't all right," I said.
       "Then, in that case, make it a double," Chris said.
       We all laughed.
       When Kyle cooked a meal, you never knew how much of it he made himself and how much of it he had gotten from his "sources." It was always very good, and that night was no exception.
       He brought out boiled crabs and boiled shrimp. I knew he had caught the crabs, and I assumed the shrimp had come from his Vietnamese friends that he did business with all the time. He had boiled the crabs a couple of days before and they were chilled, but the shrimp were freshly boiled. The shrimp were huge, too. He had boiled potatoes, corn on the cob, whole onions, and artichokes with the shrimp. He used newspaper as the table cloth on the tables on the patio, and he poured the whole load of shrimp and vegetables out in a long line. It was actually rather pretty, sort of longshoreman-casual style.
       "Y'all eat these artichokes. These things are delicious," Kyle said.
       "How do you eat it? It looks like a porcupine," Chris said.
       "Watch," Kyle said, and he demonstrated how to eat the artichoke leaf.
       We ordinarily ate those with drawn butter or flavored mayonnaise if they weren't stuffed, but he hadn't served that. The leaves were well seasoned, though, from the seasoning he had put in the boil with the shrimp.
       "Is this all we're having?" Justin asked.
       "Is this going to be enough?" Kyle asked.
       "Oh, hell, yeah. I just wanted to know if I should go ahead and make the kind of pig of myself that I want to," Jus said.
       "Make the biggest pig of yourself you can, Bubba. I cooked a bushel of corn for you, Jus. Have a ball, y'all," Kyle said.
       We laughed.
       That food was wonderful that night. I kept my eye on Dave. I had to show him how to get into a crab, but he caught on pretty quickly. He understood the anatomy of the shrimp, though, and it was obvious he had had those before. Probably not in that state, but pealing a boiled shrimp isn't difficult.
       Dave, along with Tim, Brian, and Denny, were drinking coke. At one point in the meal, Dave accidentally burped, and it was pretty loud.
       "I'm so sorry," Dave said, all embarrassed at having burped.
       "That's okay, Dave. We're lucky somebody didn't fart," Jus said, looking right at Kyle.
       Just as I knew he would, Kyle rocked onto one hip and let loose a pretty loud one. Everybody laughed.
       "What?" Kyle said.
       He had done that to make Dave feel okay, and most of us knew it. That's the only reason I didn't take his head off.
       "What do you expect from a hog but a grunt?" I asked, and we all laughed.
       "You better watch it, Semi-Hole," Kyle said.
       We had a great time that afternoon and night, and I know Chris and Dave felt welcome. Kyle's "little boy" was a grown man, independent and self-assured, just as I thought he would be.
       "What do you think of your little boy, Kyle?" I asked, as we were putting things away in the kitchen.
       "He ain't my little boy anymore. He's my man, now," Kyle said.
       "For sure, Kyle. For sure."

Chapter 07

(Chris's Perspective)
       Every time I went to physical therapy, I thought of Kyle. I thought of the other ones, too, but Kyle was always on my mind when I had to go to that. I had a mental image of me walking down the street or someplace with Kyle, Justin, Tim, and Brian. We had our arms crooked together at our elbows, but they weren't helping me walk. We were all walking on our own. That's what I kept seeing, and that's what kept me motivated.
       The fact of the matter is, physical therapy is very hard work. Especially the kind where you're building from nothing, like I had to do. Occupational therapy, or OT, as we called it, wasn't easy, either, but physical therapy, or PT, could wear you out, at best, and hurt like hell, at worst. When the doctor told me my prognosis, and when I figured out it was so much better than I had ever thought it would be, I was determined to get there.
       I'm not saying it was always easy. In fact, it almost never was. Sometimes I hurt so bad the tears would leak out of my eyes. It wasn't an emotional thing at all. It was pure pain forcing itself out of me through my eyes. Rick was this big endurance athlete, and that's the way I thought of myself. I was training for life the same way Rick trained for a triathlon or a marathon, and I wasn't going to let it get me down.
       As sucky as the PT and OT had been in Florida, at least the academics there had been good. I was way ahead of where I was supposed to be in school, in terms of courses and what not, when I moved to Montana. I had already taken all the math and science I needed to graduate in Montana, and the social studies, too, in fact. I needed English, of course. You can't ever get away from that subject, try as you might, but that wasn't a hard one for me. My dad made me take some more math and science because he thought I needed it, and he made me take a computer programming course, too. Like everybody else, I already knew the ins and outs of the basic computer applications, but this course was in database programming on the Web. It wasn't as hard as I thought it might be, though.
       Because I was basically ahead of myself, I didn't have to go to school all day. That's all right, though. There was plenty of PT to keep me busy. I got Sunday off from PT every week, but I only got one Saturday off a month from the time I got there until Christmas.
       "I have a present for you," Julie said right before Christmas.
       Julie was my main therapist. She was young and pretty, and I thought I was in love with her. I used to routinely get erections when she touched my legs, especially my thighs. She knew it, too, and she would either ignore them or tell me to concentrate on what I was doing. That was just part of her job. I had gotten her a present, too, of course, but I hadn't brought it that day. Damn. I knew I was going to be embarrassed when she gave me hers.
       "Your present is, we're going to start concentrating on toning after Christmas. You won't have to come in on Saturdays, and the exercise won't be quite as rough," she said.
       When she said that, I almost burst into tears. She noticed, and she hugged me.
       "Julie, . . . " I said.
       "Chris, I'm your big sister and your therapist. I'm not your girlfriend," she said.
       "I know. But I love you so much," I said.
       "And I love you, too, Chris, but it's not that kind of relationship," she said.
       "I know," I said. I'm sure there was sadness in my voice when I said that.
       I mean, I knew there was never going to be anything between us. She had a boyfriend, even. A serious one. We had talked about that a few times before. But she was so beautiful and so nice. And I loved her so much.
       "Chris, I'm very flattered that you would feel that way about me, but we've been over this, haven't we?"
       "Yeah. I'm sorry, Julie," I said. "I'll be good."
       "Okay. Let's get started," she said.
       In October, I had back-to-back surgeries. The first one was on my right leg, and the second one was on my right arm. The doctors had figured out a way to go in and reattach some muscles, or something, to make me less stiff. It had worked, too, and by Christmas I was able to use the right side of my body like I had never been able to before. It still wasn't as good as my left side, but it was a hell of a lot better.
       I got my driver's license two weeks after my second surgery, and I was sky high. The first thing I did when I got home was call Kyle.
       "Guess what I just did," I said.
       "I don't know. What? Fuck your therapist?" Kyle asked.
       I laughed. "I wish. No, I just got my driver's license. I can drive, Kyle!"
       "Oh, man! Oh, Chris! I'm so proud of you, I could bust," Kyle said. "Are you going to get a car?"
       "I'm hoping for Christmas," I said. "I know I will eventually, but I'm hoping it's going to be in a couple of months. It's probably going to be next Christmas, though. Not this one coming up."
       "I hope so, too," he said.
       We just shot the shit after that.
       Getting my license opened a whole new world to me. That, and being able to walk on crutches. After surgery, they gave me a leg brace to compensate for the muscles I didn't yet have in my right leg, and I started concentrating on walking without the sticks. It was slow at first, but one day it was almost like my muscles said, "Okay, you win." After that, I got better and better at walking without crutches. I had a limp, but it wasn't bad, I didn't think.
       The first few weeks of school I had to use a wheelchair. I was up on crutches all the time at PT and at home, but they didn't want me in the halls at school on crutches yet. After surgery and the brace on my leg, though, I went to school on crutches. That was totally liberating, compared to the chair, and I loved doing simple things, like standing in front of a urinal to do my business. I think almost every guy takes that for granted, but until you do it for the first time at sixteen, you don't know how great it is.
       I made some progress on the social front, too. I mean, I was totally in love with Julie, my therapist, but I actually started dating a girl my own age. We'd go to games and movies and parties and out to eat, and we'd go parking, too, and make out. The making out was the part I liked the best. Now that I could drive, that was possible. You can't actually do all that much parking in Montana after, say, October 1st because it's too cold, but we found ways to make out elsewhere. Once at church, even.
       It was funny to watch Madison's parents when I would go to pick her up. I knew they thought there was no way I could have sex with Madison, and they had this sort of relieved look on their faces. Little did they know.
       Although, actually, Madison and I never did have sex. I wanted to, and I thought we got pretty close a time or two, but it never happened. She said she wasn't a virgin, but she was only a sophomore, after all. I didn't really believe that business about not being a virgin. And she always came up with some reason we couldn't do it. It might have just been me, but I don't think she was ready. But I was ready, and that was the problem.
       We lost interest in each other after the novelty was gone. She was my first girlfriend, and I'd never forget her. Except, you know what? She was really only my first girl and not ever really my friend. I knew what true friends were, and I had a houseful of them in Emerald Beach, Florida. She was absolutely nothing to me like any one of those guys was.
       I stepped down from crutches to a cane for a few weeks, but I felt like a damn fool using a cane. I mean, old men use canes, not young guys like me. Skiing is a really popular sport in Missoula, Montana, where I live, and there were people on crutches all over the damn place, all the time in winter. I could just have had a skiing injury when I was on crutches but not when I was on the cane. I finally just left the cane home one day, and that was the last time I used it. My parents had insisted I take my crutches on the trip to Emerald Beach, and, frankly, I was glad I had. We had had twenty minutes to get from Concourse A to Concourse C in the Atlanta airport, and Dave and I had had to really book it. I couldn't have moved that fast without my crutches.
       Anyway, back to my social life. I made a bunch of friends with guys and girls. I wasn't at school after eleven o'clock every day, so I couldn't participate in lunch or extra-curricular activities. Except newspaper, and that was a class. The teacher actually recruited me to write a column about our school from the point of view of a disabled kid. It was actually a column about diversity, and I even got Brian to write a guest column about being gay in a big Southern high school. He did a great job, as I knew he would, and he wrote all about them having an openly-gay student body president.
       It was in newspaper that I met Lisa. She transferred in at the start of the second semester from Oregon. Her mom was a graduate student at the university, and for me it was love at first sight. God, she was gorgeous. Blond. Really good body. Beautiful face. Smart. Great personality. Everything. She was everything I wanted.
       I asked her out. By then, I had gotten rid of the cane, and I was on my own pegs. I wasn't fast, or anything, and I was obviously disabled a little bit. I wasn't a burden, though, and I could hold my own.
       Our first date was the mall. You know, look around at the stores, eat something, go to a movie. Not much make-out that first time, but a little.
       Our second date was going to a Barnes and Noble, look at the books and magazines, coffee, lots of talk, and a good bit more make-out that night.
       I'm not going to go into all the details because you can figure it out, but we really got to liking each other. Eventually we ended up at my house one Friday night when my parents and brother had gone to a professional conference with my dad, and we did the deed. After that, we both hunted chances to be together. Everybody at school knew we were a couple, and the guys treated me with more respect than I had ever known anywhere but in Emerald Beach.
       "Kyle, I got laid Friday night," I told him on the phone.
       "For real? Not just your hand?" Kyle said.
       "Yeah, for real. Lisa," I said.
       "Oh, man. That is so good, Bubba. I wish you were here for me to hug," he said.
       "I know. I wish you were here," I said.
       "Why? Does she have a brother?" he asked.
       "You shit," I said.
       He and I both laughed hard.
       Those boys in Emerald Beach kept me going through a very hard year, and I loved them for it. It was a hard year, but it was a good year, too. I mean, I got strength and dexterity and flexibility and stamina that I hadn't even dreamed of having. Lisa and I went to the Junior-Senior Prom together and danced all night long. We broke up that weekend, though. We both knew the truth. We weren't really meant for one another. Plus, she was a senior, and I was a junior. She was going off to college back in Oregon--starting that summer, actually--and I was staying put for another year. We had been for each other what we each needed at the time, but it was over.
       "Kyle, Lisa and I broke up last night," I said to him on the phone.
       "Shit! Goddamn, man," he said. "Are you heartbroken?"
       "Naw. Not really," I said. "We had fun, but it was over, you know?"
       "Good. I'm glad you're not sad about it. I can't wait for y'all to get here," he said.
       "Yeah, me either. Are you going to be ready for me, Kyle?"
       "Yeah, of course I am. I can't wait to see you and see all that you've improved," he said.
       "Kyle, you know I owe to you what I've done, don't you?"
       "You don't owe shit to me, Chris. What the hell are you talking about, boy?" he said.
       "Okay. I know you won't accept it, but I do owe you," I said.
       "The only thing you owe me is that sixty cents for that coke I bought you last summer. And I demand repayment," he said. He was talking in that funny way he used when he was joking with Justin or me or Rick. "I mean that, now. I got to have my sixty cents back."
       "Asshole," I said, and he and I laughed long and hard.
       "I wish we could stay longer than two weeks," I said to my parents before we left.
       "You're going to be off therapy for three weeks, Chris. Two weeks in Emerald Beach and a week with your grandparents," Dad said. "That's the outside limit, son. You know that."
       "I know, Dad. I want to get back. I'm sure they're going to charge me up enough for me to do a year's worth in six months. That's the kind of effect those guys have on me," I said.
       "I know. I was with you guys last summer, remember? God bless you, my son. You've made me so proud," he said.
       He kissed me on the forehead, and that was like some kind of holy anointing, or something. Goddamn! I was going to break physical therapy records when I came back. I felt it in my bones.

(Kevin's Perspective)
       It was a joy to have Paddy, Chris, and Dave with us. They fit in so naturally that you would have thought they had always been part of the family. Just as Rick predicted, Kyle, Jus, Chris, and Paddy became pals, and Tim, Brian, Denny, and Dave became a group. They did a lot together, of course, and Rick and I were often included, too, but that was how they chose to group up.
       Chris went to work at the Laguna with the other boys. I knew we didn't really need another bellhop, but he wanted desperately to work with his brothers. Kyle, of course, took charge of getting him uniformed and trained, and Chris apparently did as well as any of the others. God knows he wasn't lazy, that was for sure, and he was very, very bright.
       "Shit, I want me a limp," Kyle said one afternoon, early in the week. Tuesday afternoon, in fact.
       "Want you a limp? I thought your problem was wanting a hard. I thought limp came natural to you," Justin said.
       We all laughed.
       "He got you last, Kyle," Chris said. He delighted in that game, especially when Kyle was the brunt of the joke.
       "I know," Kyle said in response to Chris. "Not that kind of limp. If I want that kind of limp, all I need to do is look at you, especially when you're naked."
       "You look at me when I'm naked, Kyle," Justin said in a pretend-seductive voice.
       "As little as possible," Kyle said.
       "So what did you mean you want to get you a limp?" Justin asked.
       "A limp when I walk. Like him. He's getting all the pity tips," Kyle said. "How much did you make today in tips?"
       "A hundred and forty dollars," Chris said.
       "See? I made eighty, and that included two blowjobs," Kyle said.
       We all laughed.
       "Damn, I didn't even think of that," Chris said.
       We all laughed again.
       "You don't even know how to give a blowjob," Kyle said. They were both grinning their faces off, having fun.
       "Well, it's not rocket science," Chris said.
       "Pocket rocket," Kyle replied.
       "You wouldn't really do that, would you?" Dave asked his brother, obvious concern in his voice.
       "No, Dave, and Kyle wouldn't, either," Tim said. "They're just teasing, Bubba."
       "I know. I was teasing, too," Dave said.
       Everything about what he had said, though, and how he had said it, told me that he really didn't know and he really wasn't teasing.
       "Who wants to ski?" Kyle asked.
       "Ski?" Dave asked, obviously confused.
       "Water ski, he means," Brian said. "I do."
       They all said they did, including Chris.
       "I've been wanting to get your ass up on those skis for a long time, Bubba," Kyle said to Chris.
       "Well, I'm ready," he said. "By the way, I have another brace I can wear. It's fiberglass and won't get messed up if it gets wet with that salt water. In fact, when I told my orthotist I was probably going to be water skiing this summer, he made it special for me."
       "What was that word you said?" Kyle asked.
       "What? Orthotist?" Chris asked.
       "Yeah. What is that?" Kyle asked.
       "It's the guy who makes braces for you. Mine can make any kind of prosthesis you might want," Chris said.
       "He makes rubbers?" Justin asked.
       "You're thinking prophylactic, Bubba. That thing he said is different. Of course, in your case, it's about the same," Kyle said.
       We all laughed.
       "He got you last, Jus," Chris said.
       "No. Nuh-uh. We have a new rule, thanks to him," he said, meaning Kyle. "If you don't know what something is, you can't be got last on it. And I don't know all those p words y'all are saying."
       "A prosthesis is like an artificial body part, Jus. Like an artificial leg or arm or something like that," I said. "Another name for 'rubber' is prophylactic."
       "I need to see those two words written down," Jus said.
       "Not right now. We got skiing to do," Kyle said.
       They all went upstairs to get changed, all except Justin and Brian, that is. They hung back. Brian got the note pad that was next to the phone, and he wrote something on it to show to Jus. I knew Brian was showing him those two words, and I had a mini love surge for Bri just then.
       There were too many of us for us all to get in the boat to pull skiers, so we waited on the dock. Trixie got in the boat with Kyle, Justin, Rick, and Chris, but Krewe stayed on land with the rest of us. Brian had finally broken Trix of jumping in to go after every skier who fell or simply ended his run by sinking into the water, but Krewe wasn't old enough yet to have that kind of discipline.
       Kyle was driving the boat, and Rick and Jus were in the water and were going to teach Chris how to ski. It took a few false tries before Chris got up, but he finally did it. His first run didn't last very long, but he took a second run right away and skied for the full fifteen minutes Kyle usually allowed a skier.
       "Damn! That is so much fun," Chris said when he got back on the dock with us.
       It was Dave's turn to ski, and he would be followed by Paddy. Paddy had been up on the water skis a few times already that summer before Chris and Dave got there, but he wasn't really as good as the others yet. It took Dave a little longer than it had taken Chris to learn, but he finally got up, too.
       "He's not good at sports," Chris said in defense of his brother. "He can't help it."
       Dave finished his run, and Paddy went out.
       "You're pretty good at sports," Tim said.
       "You're kidding, right, Tim?" Chris asked.
       "No, I'm not. Name a sport you've played since you've been here that you haven't either won or almost won," Tim said. "I almost never win when I shoot pool, but you've won several times. You even beat Kyle."
       "I think Kyle let me win," Chris said.
       "No, he didn't, Chris. He thinks that's dishonest, and he doesn't do that. He has damn sure never let me win, or anybody else that I've seen him lose to," Tim said.
       "For real?" Chris asked, looking at me.
       "For real, Chris," I said. "Have you guys played strip pool yet?"
       "No, but I want to," Chris said. "I want to do everything you guys do."
       "Get Kyle to organize a game of strip pool, Chris," Brian said. "And just hope he doesn't grow his own cue stick."
       We all laughed.
       "What do you mean by that?" Dave asked.
       "We were playing one time, and Kyle lost all his clothes. He got a hard-on," Tim said. "It's been a joke in the family ever since."
       Dave got a slightly worried look on his face, and Brian noticed.
       "Dave, if it happens to you, shooting pool or swimming or shooting baskets or something, nobody's going to make fun of you for it, Bubba. The only reason we tease Kyle about growing his own cue stick is he took a shot with his dick," Brian said.
       "Oh, I didn't know that," I said. "That puts things into a whole different perspective, doesn't it?"
       "You didn't know that, Kevin?" Brian asked.
       "No, I didn't know that. What did he do, get up on the table or something?" I asked.
       "No. The cue ball was against the rail, and the ball he was shooting at was just a couple of inches down from it. He stood on tip toe and did it," Brian said.
       "Did he make the shot?" I asked.
       "Yes, he did," Brian said.
       "Kevin, Kyle and Justin do all kinds of stuff when it's just us, and you and Rick are not around," Tim said. "One thing they both do when we're shooting pool is take their dicks out and dangle them in the pocket the other one is trying to make. That's usually when we're playing Eight Ball and it's the winning shot of the game. I've seen each of them do it, and every time it rattled the shooter so much he missed a pretty easy shot."
       "Well, that doesn't seem so terrible," I said.
       "It's not," Brian said. "They don't do bad things. I mean, things that you would consider immoral or anything. They just do funny stuff, Kev."
       "I hope it's not dangerous stuff," I said.
       "It's not," Tim said.
       I wondered if Tim and the other boys had the same standard for what was dangerous as I had, and I suspected they didn't. I mean, having your dick slammed by a pool ball traveling at x-number of miles per hour wasn't exactly safe, in my opinion.
       "They never drive after they've had something to drink," Brian said. "Tim and I always drive, and they don't hassle us about it, either."
       "I knew that," I said.
       I wondered about when they were out with their friends and Tim and Brian weren't along. Justin went out with just Chuck sometimes, and with Chuck and Tony, and he had gone out a few times with some other guys from work, too, without Brian. Kyle went out with Philip and Ryan all the time, and with other friends, occasionally, too.
       "Kyle and Justin don't drink when they have to drive, Kevin, if we're not with them," Tim said. "Believe me on that, Bubba. I know that's what you're worried about, and I can see it on your face. And they won't ride with somebody who's been drinking, either. You don't know this, Kev, and they'd probably both be pissed off if they knew I told you this, but they've each called us more than once to come get them because the guy that was driving had been drinking."
       "They've call late at night?" I asked.
       "Yeah," Brian said. "That's what cell phones are for."
       That truly was a load off my mind. That was the kind of thing Rick would never think about, but I was the worry-wart of the partnership, so it was my job. I was glad to know they had worked it out.
       Kyle wanted to teach Chris how to drive the boat, after the three newest family members had skied. Chris, of course, was excited. It suddenly occurred to me that one of the things Kyle and Chris had in common was the ability to get excited over the most mundane occurrences and to enjoy to the fullest absolutely everything they did. That was a real gift, I thought, and it added to the fun the rest of us had.
       Chris did okay driving the boat. After it got too dark to ski, we went back up to the house for a snack. They had all worked up a bigger appetite than usual, and Kyle and Rick brought out a big tray of cold cuts and bread, lettuce and tomato slices, pickles, chips, and a big bowl of potato salad. We made sandwiches on the floor in the den.
       "Can we give the dogs a nibble?" Chris asked.
       "No! Absolutely not," Dave said. He was vehement.
       "God! Okay! Bite my head off, why don't you," Chris said to his brother.
       "You can't feed a dog table scraps, Chris," Dave said, slightly more conciliatory in tone.
       "Okay, David. That's all I wanted to know," Chris said somewhat patronizingly.
       Uh-hunh, I thought. They're brothers, all right.
       "Chris, have you ever done any bungee jumping?" Kyle asked.
       "Like from a bridge or something?" Chris asked.
       "No. Well, yeah, but we have five or six bungee jumping places here. It's from a tower, not a bridge," Kyle said.
       "No, I haven't," Chris said.
       "Would you like to?"
       "Sure," Chris said immediately.
       "Kyle, I don't know about that," I said.
       "Kevin, we do it all the time. Nobody's going to get hurt," Kyle said.
       "I'm not fragile, Kevin. I've just put in fifteen months of intense body building. I'm not going to break," Chris said.
       "Babe, he's not going to break," Rick said.
       "Do you think it's okay?" I asked Rick.
       "Yes, I do, Kev. He's not going to break. Unless he refuses to wear the harness, of course. And even then he probably wouldn't break, with that huge airbag they have at the bottom," Rick said.
       "Wouldn't you guys rather shoot pool or play ping pong?" I asked.
       "No! I want to jump," Chris said. "Kevin, your big brothers are supposed to let you do stuff your parents might not let you do. Come on."
       "Well, it really is very safe," I said. "I've done it several times, and it's okay. I was just concerned about the impact of the harness on his chest and bones and all."
       "God, almighty, Kevin! This boy has as much upper body muscle as you do," Justin said. "More, even."
       That wasn't true, but it was a point well taken. He wasn't skin and bones anymore, by any means.
       "Okay, then. Let's go. But if anybody pukes, do it outside on the grass, not in the car, you hear?" I said.
       They all laughed.
       Bungee jumping was fun. Pure terror, and that's what boys loved. It was nine o'clock at night, but it was still hot as hell. The sea breeze was coming in, and we were all in minimal clothing--tank tops and light cotton shorts. But it was still very hot. Coming down during his jump, Chris lost his wallet out of his back pocket, and everybody scrambled to get the wallet and its contents before they blew away.
       "Damn, that was fun!" Chris said.
       He had an erection, and it was tenting out his shorts. Justin noticed, of course.
       "What is this thing all about?" Justin asked.
       Chris blushed.
       "Don't you damn blush around me, you pussy-packer," Jus said.
       "I'm just a little bit excited," Chris said. "That's all."
       The two of them were laughing.
       "I can tell. Hell, the whole damn world can tell. Fix it up straight or something, before we get out of here," Jus said.
       Chris laughed, but he reached down into his shorts to make his erection less noticeable.
       "That happens to Kyle all the time, Chris," Tim said. "He gets erections watching football games, basketball games, just about anything that's tense and exciting. Don't worry about it, okay?"
       "Thanks, Tim," Chris said.
       They were all damn sure going to take care of Chris, in whatever way they thought he needed taking care of.
       We got some ice cream cones after the bungee jumping, and then we decided to play a round or two of goofy golf. "Goofy Golf" was Emerald Beach's name for putt-putt, and that was fun. I noticed that Dave and Denny were pretty palzy-walzy that night, and they were cute together. They were the same size and pretty much the same age, and they were very much the same kind of bookish kid. Interesting, I thought.
       "It's 11:15," Rick said. "It's time we went home."
       The boys didn't dawdle in the den that night. They were tired from skiing, bungee jumping, and playing goofy golf. Rick and I were both asleep that night before our heads hit the pillows.
       * * *
       Friday morning of the first week they were here, all the boys were at the breakfast table, as usual, except Denny and Dave.
       "I'll go get them," I said.
       Dave didn't really have to be up until it was time for him and Brian to be at Mr. Mack's place to train the dogs, after Brian went to summer school, but Denny had to be at work on time. Denny's room was on the second floor, and Dave was sleeping in one of the third-floor rooms. I went to Denny's room.
       I tapped on the door, but there was no response.
       "Denny, I'm coming in," I said, opening the door.
       There was still no response.
       I went into the room, and Denny and Dave were both there. They were naked, and the sheet and spread were kicked off. They both had erections, but that was just morning wood. I noticed dried semen on both of them, though, and the bottom sheet was soaked. Some of it had dried, but it was still wet in a big spot between them.
       "Wake up, Denny," I whispered, shaking him a little. I didn't want to wake Dave. "You've got to go to work."
       He was incredibly cute coming out of sleep. When he finally woke up, he realized what the scene was, and he was embarrassed.
       "Kevin!" he said in a whisper.
       "What? Get up. You've got to go to work," I said.
       "It's not what you think, Kevin," he said.
       "Oh, yes, it is," I said, grinning.
       He blushed deeply.
       "Yes, it is," he said, and he grinned, too.
       "I'm not going to say anything. This is your private life, Denny. You know that what you do in private stays private in this house," I said.
       "Don't you think he's cute?" Denny asked.
       "I think he's incredibly cute, but I think you're incredibly cute, too. But it's time to get up. Take a shower. You need one. Breakfast is on the table, and don't make the others late having to wait for you," I said.
       "Yes, sir," he said.
       Denny was downstairs in less than ten minutes. Apparently, his approach to hurrying up was to not dry himself after his shower, but that was okay. Nobody was the wiser. He didn't get to finish his breakfast, though.
       "The price of love," I said, as he was scraping half his breakfast off his plate into the garbage.
       He grinned. What a cute kid, I thought.

(Dave's Perspective)
       Brian and I had hit it off good when they came to see us in Montana the summer before, and I really liked him. He had helped me accept the fact that I was gay and that it was okay to be gay. I loved Brian, but he seemed like a grown-up to me. I mean, he wasn't really that much older than I was, but I knew he loved Justin. There wasn't anything I could do about that.
       That school year had been sort of hard for me. I mean, Chris got most of the attention from my parents because of all the progress he was making in physical therapy, and all. I felt really bad that I wasn't more excited about that, but I wanted them to focus more on me. I had liked being an only child.
       Another thing that happened that year was my dad became a full professor and got tenure. He had already written one book and a bunch of research articles, but his second book came out that year. There was a lot of hoopla about that in my family and among their friends. I had come out to my family that I was gay right after the Florida guys left at the end of the summer, and it was almost a non-event. I mean, my parents didn't care, and Chris thought it was cool. So there I was. A victim of physical therapy and tenure and tolerance. Sheesh!
       Even though I had a strong support system at home, I wasn't about to come out at school. I had a friend that I thought was gay, too, but he and I never talked about it. That boy was definitely somebody I could get sexual with, but we just didn't have that kind of friendship. I mean, I thought he was gay, but I didn't know for sure. I wasn't about to come out to him until he came out to me, and that just never happened.
       When we went to Emerald Beach, though, I knew I was going into a nest of gay boys. I was sure Chris had mentioned Denny to me from emails he had gotten from them, but I hadn't really focused that much on him. Not at all, really. He was kind of a surprise, in fact. But what a nice surprise he was.
       He and I, along with Tim and Brian, were sort of a foursome. Not a sex foursome, of course. Just four good friends. But Tim and Brian had boyfriends, and they were already best friends. The more I got to know Denny, the better I liked him. Seeing the others naked in the pool was fun, but only a few times right after I got there had seeing them caused any reaction down below. Denny was an exception, though, and I always started getting aroused when I looked at him.
       As the days went by, I started thinking about Denny when I masturbated. One night we were both in his bedroom, lying on his bed, reading. I could feel his arm touching my arm and his leg touching my leg, and I was fully erect. I couldn't concentrate on my book, I was so horny.
       We finally both put our books aside and started talking.
       "You don't have a boyfriend, do you?" he said.
       "No. Do you?"
       "I've had a few dates with a boy, but we aren't boyfriends or anything. We're just friends, really. Best friends, in fact," he said. "Have you ever done it?"
       "Done what? Had sex?" '
       "Yeah," he said.
       "No," I said. I was scared to death of having sex. I mean, I thought that was a guy sticking his penis into my rectum, and I wasn't interested in that.
       "I have," he said. "Brady and I kissed and hugged, and then we both came. We've done it a few times. I've even touched his penis. And he's touched mine."
       "Is that what gay guys do for sex?" I asked. I didn't know much about gay sex.
       "Yeah. I think some guys do butt fucking and all, but Brady and I don't do that," he said.
       "I want to kiss you," I said.
       "Okay," he said, and we kissed.
       "Do you know about tongue?" he asked.
       "No," I said.
       "Just do what I do, okay?" he said.
       "Okay," I said.
       He taught me how to kiss with tongue that night, and that was awesome. The next night, we took it further, and he touched my erection through my clothes.
       "Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" he asked.
       "Yes," I said.
       "Let's sleep naked," he said.
       And that was all it took. We rubbed against each other, kissed each other, and finally made each other come. I guess that was pretty tame, compared to what the others in the house were doing, but I felt so good.
       I knew that Denny and I weren't in love, but we really, really liked each other. I also felt like I wasn't a virgin anymore, and that mattered to me. I knew my brother hadn't been a virgin for a long time, and now I wasn't one, either. I didn't know if he and I would ever compare notes, but at least I had that on him.

Chapter 08

(Kevin's Perspective)
       "Hey, what are you doing?" the voice said when I answered the phone. It was Cherie.
       "I'm talking on the phone," I said.
       "Me, too," she said.
       I loved that girl as much as I loved my brother, and he knew it, too.
       "Any news," I asked.
       "No. We just got back from the doctor, and he reminded me the first ones often are slow in arriving. Kevin, I am so ready for this baby to get here, I could scream. It's so damn hot," she said.
       "So, when do you go back?" I asked.
       "In a week. The official due date isn't until the thirtieth, of course, so it's not like I'm overdue or anything. I guess I just have to sweat it out, and I mean that quite literally," she said. "What's going on there? How are the Montana boys?"
       "They're wonderful, Sis," I said. "I wish all of you could meet them. You wouldn't have any way of appreciating this, but the change in Chris since last summer is just short of miraculous. He has to wear a leg brace on his right leg, but that thing doesn't slow him down one bit. And you should see him go at it in the weight room. Let me tell you. That boy is driven."
       "What about the other one?" she asked.
       "He's sort of a younger Brian, actually. He's as cute as a button, and he's very smart, too. But so is Chris. He and Brian were good friends last summer, and they're bonding even more right now. Dave is his name. He and Brian are training dogs with Brian's Dog Man," I said.
       "Is Brian in summer school?" she asked.
       "Yeah, he is. He's taking American History in this first half, and it's a shame because it's really no challenge for him. He's taking it for new credit, but he's in there with a bunch of people who failed it last school year. Naturally, the teacher is taking it very slowly, and rather superficially, too, I might add. Brian has already read the whole textbook, and the teacher more or less has him on sort of an independent study program. He is so smart. He's taking trig the second half of summer school," I said.
       "You're not bragging just a little bit about your son, now, are you?" she asked.
       "Yes, damn it, I am bragging about my son, but I'm not exaggerating. He's simply incredible. What can I say?" I said.
       "Why is he doing this, anyway?" she asked.
       "He's doing this so he can graduate a year early. He wants to start Tulane a year from this coming fall, when Tim starts there. Rick and I were leery of it at first, and we're still not convinced it's the best thing for his education. But how do you tell four guys like them that they can't stay together as a group? I know it would only be for a year, but Tim and Brian are bound and determined to go through college and medical school together, as a team," I said.
       "Are you sure there's nothing going on between them?" she asked.
       "I'm absolutely sure, Sis. I'd be more worried about the older two than I would be those guys, but I'm also absolutely sure Kyle and Justin are faithful to their guys," I said. "Changing the subject slightly, I wish all of you could come for the Fourth."
       "Oh, I know. We had such a good time last year for that. Is there going to be a big party again this year?" she asked.
       "Of course. Tim, Kyle, and Brian have it all planned. The gift theme this year is money," I said. "The Big Four all want to go to Europe together next summer, so they're saving their money."
       "The irony is, Kyle could probably buy them a small country, if he wanted to," she said.
       "It's that much, huh?" I said. She was Kyle's attorney, so she knew.
       "Oh, Kevin, it's vast. I wish I could tell you, but you know I can't," she said.
       "Yeah, I know. Does he know?" I asked.
       "Well, yeah, more or less. He knows approximately how much he's worth, but the figures change hourly, almost. He's totally uninterested in it, though. I've needed to talk to him a few times in the last month or so, and every time I've called him, all he's wanted to talk about was the baby. I know he's young, Kevin, but he's not stupid," she said.
       "Yes, he is young, and, no, he's not stupid," I said. "But those are his values, Cherie. Kyle is the most people-oriented person I have ever known, by far. And pretty much one of the most un-materialistic ones, too. I'm surprised he hasn't wanted to set up trust funds for his boys."
       "What makes you think he hasn't?" she asked. "I advised against that for now, but that's definitely down the road. God, I want to tell you so much. This confidentiality shit is killing me!"
       I laughed.
       "Well, but you have to be a good little lawyer-girl, now, don't you?"
       "Yeah. Listen, I need to go. It's been twenty minutes since I last peed. It's time again," she said.
       I laughed.
       "Take care, Sis. I want instant updates whenever anything happens, you hear?" I said.
       "Oh, I know, and you'll get them, too, either from me or from Craig. Kevin, I love you, but I really do have to go. Bye."
       She hung up before I could tell her goodbye.
       The stuff she said about Kyle didn't really surprise me. Rick and I were still uncovering the depths of Gene Goodson's business interests, and I knew the man was much richer than we had ever imagined.
       * * *
       "I talked to Cherie today," I said, when we were gathered in the den for our after-work snack. The boys and Rick had worked out, and they hadn't showered yet. The house smelled like a locker room.
       "What'd she say?" Kyle demanded.
       "She had just been to the doctor, and everything's fine," I said.
       "That little boy better get his ass out on July 4th. That's all I'm saying," Jus said.
       "He very well might, Bubba. The doctor reminded her today that first babies are often late," I said.
       "If that baby is born on my birthday, that's going to be the best present I ever had in my whole life," Jus said.
       "I know. It'll be a present for all of us," Kyle said. "I talked to her a couple of days ago, and she told me she was really suffering from the heat. Is that any better?"
       "No, it isn't. She mentioned that," I said.
       "This is the hottest I've ever been in my life," Chris said.
       "Me, too, Chris," Paddy said. "I thought I had come to paradise."
       "Not in the summer. This is fucking hell in the summer," Kyle said. "Now, fall, winter, and spring are a different story. It's great here, then. Not the summer, though. Did y'all know they invented air conditioning in Apalachicola, Florida, not sixty miles from here?"
       "Kyle, it was refrigeration, not air conditioning," Brian said.
       "Same difference. Somebody over there figured out how to get cool," Kyle said.
       "That's a pretty major invention," Paddy said. "What was the name of the town?"
       "Apalachicola. We call it Apalach. When we were at the state science fair, there was a boy and his teacher from Apalach at our table," Kyle said. "Y'all remember that boy?"
       "Yeah, I remember him," Brian said.
       "Did y'all think he was gay?" Kyle asked.
       "Hell, there was no question he was gay," Justin said. "I didn't think the teacher was, though."
       "Buddy, when y'all went out to smoke, we came out to him. The boy was flabbergasted. His teacher told him that's why they had to leave Franklin County from time to time, so they could meet different kinds of people," Brian said.
       "Every place I've been has been air conditioned," Paddy said. "It's not like that in the Boston area."
       "Montana, either," Chris said. "For example, we don't have air conditioning in our house."
       "For real?" Kyle demanded.
       "Yeah, for real," Chris said. "We have windows, Kyle."
       "Yeah, and so do we, and I'm going to throw your ass out one, if you don't behave," Kyle said.
       We all laughed.
       "We don't open them, though, except maybe a couple of weeks a year," Kyle said.
       "I used to live in an un-air conditioned trailer that wasn't even under a tree," Denny said. "It was so hot I could hardly breathe."
       "See, to me that's child abuse. Making somebody live in an un-air conditioned house, much less a trailer," Kyle said.
       "But Kyle, you can freeze to death, but you can't sweat to death," Paddy said.
       "You can't sweat to death, but I think people die of the heat. That's what I've seen on TV, anyhow. This is making me hot. Let's get in the water," Kyle said.
       We laughed, but we followed him out to the pool for a swim.
       * * *
       The two weeks the Montana boys were there were wonderful. Chris was totally gregarious, as we already knew he was, and he had a fabulous time with his brothers. Dave was sort of quiet. It was obvious he enjoyed being with all of us, but he didn't have all that much to say. If you lined our boys up on a continuum, from bold to meek, it would have to be Kyle-Justin-Tim-Denny-Brian. Dave was very much a Brian, and, not surprisingly, the two of them seemed to be best friends. Paddy was somewhere between Tim and Denny.
       The big shift came when the Fourth of July approached. That was Justin's birthday, of course, and that was a big thing for our family. It was also the biggest tourist weekend of the year for Emerald Beach, and people from far and wide poured onto our beaches to celebrate. The actual holiday was on a Saturday this year, so that made it even bigger than usual.
       Seth and Curt were the first to get there on Thursday night, around ten o'clock. They were both working, but they had Friday off, since the Fourth fell on a Saturday.
       There was a big celebration at our house when they got there.
       "God, almighty, Seth. What the hell did you do to yourself, man?" Justin said.
       We hadn't seen Seth since Mardi Gras, and he had grown and changed even more since then. He had been working out a lot, and that boy had really filled out. He wasn't the ugly, scrawny kid he had been when we first met him, that was for sure.
       "I've been working out, that's all," Seth said.
       "Well, it damn sure worked, Bubba," Justin said. "You're a big, strapping man, now."
       Seth had a grin plastered on his face that wouldn't quit. He was obviously proud of himself, and our boys were totally appropriate in noticing and approving of what he had done.
       "He's filled out good, too," Kyle said, referring to Curt.
       "I know. I ain't going to the beach with you guys," Justin said. "I don't want to be compared."
       Seth and Curt were just as happy as they could be, but they both still had a way to go to look like Justin and Kyle.
       We did our usual pool thing, with lots of eats and drinks, courtesy of Kyle.
       The next day, we skied and played and had a great time. The guys all went to the beach for a little while, and they came back with identical fake tattoos on their left biceps. I almost had a heart attack when I saw them because they looked so authentic. I thought they were real ones.
       "Whose idea was this? Kyle?" I asked. I know he could hear the agitation in my voice.
       "Mine. You like 'em?" he asked.
       "No, I don't like them one damn bit. What am I supposed to tell Betty and Ralph Uhle? Huh? And they're both underage, to boot," I said.
       "They're fakes, Kevin," Kyle said. "Lighten up. Do you think we'd get real tattoos?"
       "Kyle, you've got a real tattoo," I said.
       "I know, but not where you can see it. Give me some credit, man," Kyle said.
       He had kind of a hurt look on his face, and I was sorry I had reacted so strongly without thinking it through.
       "Kyle, I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. I should have known I can trust you," I said.
       "Every once in a while you really get to me, Kevin, and it's always on the thing of trust. I've got feelings, too, you know," he said.
       "I know you do, and I hurt them. I'm sorry I did that," I said. "Are we still friends?"
       "Don't be stupid. Of course we're still friends," he said.
       "But . . .?" I said.
       "But nothing. Nothing has changed. I should have told you we were getting them before we went," he said. "I'm sorry I didn't."
       "Can I have a hug?" I asked.
       I loved that kid, and I knew I had hurt his feelings. It pained me a lot that I had caused him pain, and for no good reason, either. He was a good kid, and I knew it. That had happened with him once before, and I had resolved then to think before I reacted. I didn't keep that resolution.
       "Yeah, just don't smear my tattoo," he said.
       We hugged and we laughed. The other boys had gone out to the pool to show off their new "ink," so it was just Kyle and I in the house.
       "I really do like them, especially for the holiday," I said.
       They had gotten a stylized eagle with a patriotic theme.
       "I'll take you to get one, if you want. It costs fifteen bucks, but the lady said they would last three weeks, unless we used coal cream on them. Tim and I got these summer before last, remember?" he said.
       "Yeah, I remember. I think I'll pass, but I do like them on you guys," I said. He seemed okay with me, and I was glad.
       "Okay, but if you change your mind, let me know," he said.
       "Okay, Bubba. Let's go play with the others," I said, and we did.
       That night Jerry brought over Vince, the priest from Sarasota. The New Orleans and Sarasota relatives weren't coming, but Alex and Cody called to see if they could come over that night. Of course they could. They were in town for the holiday, too.
       A bunch of kids were there, too: Chad and Gage; Philip and Ryan; Morgan, Blake, and Riley; Chip; Steve. It was quite an assortment.
       "Kevin, I didn't expect this tonight," Kyle said. "How are we going to feed all these people?"
       Justin, Tim, and Brian were in the kitchen with Kyle and me.
       "Get on the phone. Call your man at the Publix," Justin said. "Kyle, you've done more business there than half the people in Emerald Beach put together. Tell him you've got an emergency party on your hands."
       "That's what it's got to be, Kevin. I can't feed this many people with what we've got in the house, unless I go into what we've got for tomorrow," he said. "This is an emergency."
       I started laughing. He was so funny saying that.
       "What are you laughing at? It ain't funny, Bubba," he said.
       "Kyle, it's not really an emergency," I said, still laughing. "They're not going to die if you don't put on a spread."
       He grinned. "I know. It's sort of a hospitality emergency, don't you think? I'm just trying to get prepared for my future," he said.
       "Kyle, you are already so prepared," I said.
       "Well, maybe so, but let's get cracking. I want food on those tables out there in one hour. Get busy, boys," he said.
       And in exactly one hour, we had a buffet table set up that was spectacular. Most of it was cold stuff, like fried chicken and coleslaw and potato salad. Green salad and three vegetable casseroles. He had a huge platter of hot ribs, too, and a platter of boiled shrimp. Boiled crabs, too, of course. There was enough food for twice that many men.
       "Father Vince, I want to ask you to ask the blessing, if you don't mind," Kyle said, as we were getting ready to eat.
       "Kyle, I was hoping you would," Vince said.
       "Heavenly Father, when you created human beings, you said, in effect, I'll let the majority be straight and the minority be gay, as a witness to diversity. We thank you, Father, for that role in society, for our gifts, and for our uniqueness. Some of us have vowed celibacy, and please strengthen us in that vow. Others of us have chosen a life of partnership with another, and grant us the grace of faithfulness to that calling. Others of us are still groping to find our niche in life, and grant us that grace, too. But most of all, Lord, bless us tonight, and these your gifts, which we are about to receive from your bounty, through Christ, our Lord. Amen."
       There was dead silence after that prayer. He had said so much in so little time.
       "Let's eat," Kyle said. "Out-of-towners first, and then anybody who can shove in line."

(Kyle's Perspective)
       I thought Kevin was going to have a cow over those damn tattoos. I love that man as much as I love my own parents, and I think the world of him, but every now and then he pisses me off and hurts my feelings. I know he doesn't do it on purpose, but it still hurts.
       "Your tattoos are cool," Father Vince said. Justin and I were at the table with him and Jerry to eat.
       "Thanks," I said. "We just got them today. They're fakes, though."
       "I knew that. I mean they look real, but they'd be red and swollen if they were real and you had just gotten them today," he said.
       "I wish a certain big brother of mine had noticed that," I said.
       "Who? Kevin?" Justin asked.
       "Yeah, he crawled all over my ass about 'em right after we got home," I said.
       "Was he mad?" Jus asked.
       "Yeah, he was mad. He thought they were real," I said. "We patched it up, though, like we always do."
       "Father Vince, can I ask you something?" Justin said.
       "Why don't you just call me Vince? You call him Jerry, don't you?" Father Vince said.
       "Okay, Vince. Do you mind if I ask you a question?" Jus said.
       "No. Go ahead. Your name is Justin, right?"
       "Yes, sir. I'm Justin. What I was wondering was, are you gay?"
       Vince and Jerry looked at each other and sort of smiled.
       "Yes, I am, Justin," he said. "I guess I gave myself away during grace, didn't I?"
       "Yes, sir, that's how I knew," Jus said. "Let me ask you something else. Do you have to be gay to be a priest?"
       Jerry and Vince laughed, but I thought it was a damn good question, myself.
       "No, it's not required," Vince said. "In fact, there's a lot of controversy in the Church right now about the number of gay clergy."
       "I think it's just a coincidence, Jus. You happen to know two priests, and they just happen to be gay," Jerry said.
       "Y'all aren't the only priests we know," I said. "Father Logan's gay, isn't he?"
       "You'll have to ask him that," Jerry said.
       "Is he talking about Tony Logan?" Vince asked.
       Jerry nodded. Father Logan was the pastor of the church, and Jerry was his assistant.
       "And that bishop guy in New Orleans, Grandpa's friend. What's his name?" Justin asked.
       "Bishop Greg," I said. "Yeah, him, and Kevin's Uncle Ray, too. The one that married them. Every priest we know is gay. When he asked that question, I was wondering the same thing."
       "You guys know a bishop in New Orleans?" Vince asked.
       "Yeah. He and Kevin's daddy went to high school together. He went to the race track with us, and then came over for a cocktail party at Christmas," I said. "I don't really consider that knowing him, but I did talk to him some, and all. He's a really nice guy."
       "You guys don't act . . . you know. But that bishop sure does. A blind man could spot that, just from the way he talks," Jus said.
       "Uncle Ray's pretty much like that, too," I said.
       "Bishop Gregory Bascomb is the chair of the conference we're going to," Vince said. "It's on celibacy and sexuality. This might make it more interesting."
       Jerry laughed.
       "You guys understand that it's possible to be gay and not be sexually active, right?" Vince said.
       "Oh, yeah. We know all about that from Jerry," Justin said. "I don't think that would be that much fun, though."
       Jerry and Vince laughed. "Well, let's just say it makes life a little more interesting," Jerry said.
       * * *
       I kept my cell phone handy day and night that last week of June and that first week of July, just in case we got us a baby.
       "What makes you think they're going to call you?" Brian asked the day before the Fourth.
       "They promised they'd call us the minute he got here," I said.
       "Yeah, I know, but they're not going to call you," Bri said.
       "Well, who are they going to call, then?" I asked.
       "Kevin?"
       "Oh, yeah," I said.
       "Kyle, there was a time when I actually thought you were smart, you know that? Forget it," Justin said.
       We all laughed.
       "How do you know I don't have Kevin's phone programmed to ring on my number?" I asked.
       "I don't know. Do you?" Jus said.
       "No," I replied, and they all laughed some more.
       I was taking it on the hip, and I deserved it.
       The waiting ended, though, on the morning of the Fourth of July. We were all in the den having coffee and hanging out in our underwear. The house phone rang. I was next to it, so I answered it.
       "Hello," I said.
       "Kyle, it's Craig. Is everybody in the den?"
       "Yeah. What's going on?" I said. I was very excited.
       "Put the call on speaker," he said.
       "Okay," I said, and I did like he told me.
       "Good morning, guys," Craig said.
       We all told him hello and what not.
       "What's up?" Kevin asked.
       "We've got us a baby boy," he said.
       Everybody cheered and clapped and whistled. Craig was trying to say something, but nobody could hear him.
       "Calm down," Kevin said to all of us. "What time was he born, Craig?"
       "He was born at 6:36 this morning. Mother and son are doing fine," he said.
       "How big is he?" Rick asked.
       "Seven pounds, five ounces. I took some pictures of him already, and you can see what he looks like if you open Kevin's email," he said.
       "Go do it," I said.
       "Just a second," Kevin replied.
       "What's your password. I'll do it," I said.
       "I'm not telling you my password," Kevin said.
       "Do you know his password?" I asked Rick.
       "No. Hush," Rick said.
       "God!" I said.
       "What did you decide to name him?" Brian asked.
       Good question, I thought.
       "Okay, guys, are you ready?" Craig asked.
       "Yeah, we're ready," Kevin said.
       "His name is Robert Kevin Foley, and we're going to call him Rob," Craig said.
       Kevin had the biggest grin on his face I had ever seen.
       "Thank you, Craig," Kevin said.
       "I'm the one who should be thanking you, Bubba, don't you think?" Craig said.
       "When can we come see him?" I asked.
       "We'll probably leave the hospital tomorrow, but give us a couple of weeks, okay?"
       "Okay. Keep the pictures coming, though," Kevin said.
       "I will. I'll get some more out to you today," Craig said.
       "Is it okay if we put them on the family Web site?" I asked.
       "Sure. Please do, in fact," Craig said.
       "You can set up one of those Yahoo photo albums, Kyle," Brian said. "That way all their friends can see them, too."
       "Very good idea, Brian," Craig said. "Listen, guys, I need to run. Cherie and Rob and I love all of you. Bye."
       "Bye, Craig," we all said at one time.
       "Let me go check some email," Kevin said.
       We all went into the study with him. He fired up the machine and got his email thing open. He clicked on the attachment icon, and up popped a baby.
       "My God," Kevin said, and big tears started rolling down his cheeks.
       "He's definitely a Foley, Babe," Rick said.
       "Kevin, that baby looks more like you than you do," Justin said.
       "I know," Kevin said. "Guys, I need to be with Rick by ourselves for a few minutes, okay?"
       "Sure," I said.
       We all went back to the den, and Kevin and Rick went into their room.
       "Why is Kevin so upset?" Dave asked.
       "He's not upset. He's just so happy right now he can't stand it, Dave," I said. "And you know what? So am I."
       I started crying. That set Tim and Brian off, and even Justin got a little misty-eyed.
       "I told you he was going to be born on my birthday, didn't I?" Jus said. "I know they're all as happy as they can be. I know I am."
       I called Jeff and gave him the news, and then I called my parents and told them. Tim called Doc and Sonya, and told them about the baby.
       "What about the Sarasota grandparents?" Tim asked.
       "Let's let Rick call them," I said. "I'm trying to think of who else we need to call."
       "Grandma and Grandpa Foley?" Brian asked.
       "Naw. They already know," I said.
       "Duh! Kyle! I know they know, but don't you want to talk to them?" Brian asked.
       "Kevin would be pissed off if we called his parents," I said.
       "No, he wouldn't."
       It was Kevin. He and Rick had come in without me seeing them.
       "Give 'em a call, but use Grandma's cell number, Kyle," Kevin said. "I'm sure she's at the hospital."
       I dialed the number, but I got her voice mail. She probably couldn't talk where she was. I left a message for her to call us back as soon as she could.
       "Seth, you and Curt are going to get to see Rob before any of us," Kevin said.
       "I know. He really does look a lot like you, Kevin," Seth said.
       "There's a reason for that," Kevin said. "He was conceived with my sperm."
       "What!?" two or three of them said.
       "Artificial insemination," Rick said. "I played a part in it, too."
       "Yeah, I'll bet you did," Justin said. "Always ready to lend a helping hand, ain't you?"
       We all laughed.
       "I don't get it," Dave said.
       "Rick jerked him off. That's how they got the sperm," Justin said.
       "Really?" Dave asked.
       "Yeah, really, Bubba," Kevin said. "But, you know, Rob also looks like his father."
       "Aren't you his father?" Dave asked.
       "No, Craig's his father. I'm his uncle," Kevin said.
       "I'm missing something," Dave said.
       "No, you aren't. I donated the sperm, so he has my genes, but he's Craig's child. Craig's and Cherie's," Kevin said. "They're his parents, Bubba. Not me."
       "Well, I think the whole thing's pretty cool," Chris said.
       * * *
       The people started arriving for the day-long party around eleven. We did all the things we usually do at a big party like that.
       Our close friends had a gift of money for Justin, and he did pretty damn good on that haul. We were all saving up to go to Europe, and that was a good start on his amount. Some of the people didn't even know it was his birthday, so we didn't have a public gift opening, or anything. We didn't want them to be embarrassed because they hadn't gotten him anything.
       Craig sent ten pictures of Rob that day, and Jeff and I set up a photo album on the Web with them. We also posted them to our Web site.
       I lost track of how many people were in and out that day, but it was right around seventy-five. They didn't all stay the whole time, but they all got at least one beer and something to eat. I used ten gallons of gas in the boat, and I think most of the ones who wanted to ski got a chance to. I didn't stay on the boat all day, though. We had enough drivers, including Chris, that I didn't need to be out there the whole time.
       I tried to spend as much time with Chris as I could. He and I had had a wonderful time during the two weeks he was here, but he and Dave were leaving on Monday to visit Chris's mother's parents downstate. I tried to keep my mind off the fact that his time with us was almost up, but I knew I was going to miss the hell out of him.
       A bunch of people commented on our tattoos, and we had fun with those. We sang "The Star-Spangled Banner" right after grace that night, and Justin's birthday cake was patriotic. People who didn't know better thought it was just for the Fourth of July, and it didn't have any candles on it.
       There was a fireworks display at the County Pier at 9:30 that night, and some of us drove over for that. There were a ton of people at that, and most of them looked sunburned and at least a little bit drunk. Nothing bad happened, though, and the fireworks were pretty good. It was over in an hour, and it took us another forty-five minutes to get out of the parking lot. They need to do something about parking at that pier.
       The party started breaking up after we got home. Kevin and Rick, and some of the others who stayed behind, cleaned up all the food and everything while we were gone, so we didn't have that to fool with. We went back in the water for a little while. Denny and Dave were worn out, so they went up to bed.
       Tony had brought his guitar, so we did a little singing, mostly patriotic songs, and then we went to bed.
       "This has been a hell of a day, hasn't it?" Justin said, as we were walking up the stairs.
       "I'll say. Happy Birthday, Brother," I said, and I gave him a little kiss on the cheek.

(Denny's Perspective)
       The afternoon of the day before Chris and Dave left, I went to the grocery store with Kyle. It was a Sunday. I didn't usually do much with just him anymore, but I still loved him. I knew that wasn't going anywhere, though. Not as long as Tim was alive, that is.
       "You like Dave, don't you?" he asked.
       "Yeah. I like him and Chris and Paddy, too," I said.
       I wasn't exactly sure what he meant. I didn't know if he meant did I like Dave as a friend or did I like Dave, as a boyfriend.
       "But not all the same way, right?" he said.
       I'm sure I blushed.
       "Don't blush. Dave's a cutie, man," he said.
       "I like Dave a lot," I said, "and he and I have been sleeping together. I'm just glad Brady isn't here."
       "Why?" Kyle asked.
       "Brady and I do it, too," I said.
       "I figured that. Where is he?"
       "He's at church camp. You know how religious his parents are," I said.
       "Is it that same church with that mean minister?" he asked.
       "No. They belong to a different one now. Do you think I should tell Brady that I've been having sex with Dave?"
       That had been bothering me, and I was glad it had come up.
       "Are you and Brady boyfriends?" Kyle asked.
       "Well, we're best friends, for sure. And, yeah, we're boyfriends," I said. "That's why I feel bad about what I've been doing with Dave."
       "Do you think Brady would want to break up with you over it?" Kyle asked.
       "I don't know. He's never met Dave, and he probably never will. Dave will be gone tomorrow, and Brady will be back from camp next week," I said.
       "Hell, I wouldn't tell him," Kyle said. "At least not right away."
       "Have you ever cheated on Tim?" I asked.
       "That's pretty personal, Bubba," Kyle said. "I'm not going to answer that. You don't need to ask guys stuff like that."
       "I'm sorry, Kyle. Don't be mad at me," I said.
       There was a long pause.
       "I know Dave doesn't expect us to be boyfriends," I said. "He had never had sex, and we were both so, I don't know, horny I guess. You don't know what it was like."
       He was driving, but he turned to look at me.
       "I don't know what it's like to be horny?"
       The way he said that was incredibly cute and funny, and I laughed. He laughed, too.
       "I know you know," I said.
       "Denny, you're only fifteen. Now before you get mad; just listen to what I'm going to say, okay?" he said.
       "Okay."
       "When I was fifteen, I wanted sex all the time. It seemed like I had a hard-on all the time, and I beat off three or four times a day, every day."
       "You mean jerk off?" I said.
       "Yeah. Beat off, jerk off. Same thing. What I was going to say is, I would no more have been able to be faithful to Tim than the man in the moon, especially if I had had easy access to sex. The fact is, I wasn't having sex with anybody, but I sure wanted to. I think guys mature, especially when they're in a serious relationship. Are you and Brady serious, you think?"
       "You mean, are we in love?" I asked.
       "Yeah," he said.
       "Yeah, we love each other," I said. "I don't think we're in love like you and Tim are, though. We're not ready to make any kind of commitment or anything. It's more like we're just good friends."
       "Naw, I wouldn't tell him, then," he said.
       That night was going to be my last night with Dave because they were leaving the next day, and I decided then and there that we'd have sex again that night. He was a good guy, and I knew he was looking forward to it. I couldn't let him down. But I also decided I wasn't going to ever do it again with anybody if I had a boyfriend. I didn't like the guilt.

Chapter 09

(Kyle's Perspective)
       I cried my eyes out when we went to the airport to put Chris and Dave on the plane. There was a part of me that wanted him home right away so he could get back to his PT, but there was a much bigger part of me that wanted him to move to Emerald Beach.
       "What are you doing after you graduate," I asked him one day.
       He and I were by ourselves on the boat. I loved my brothers to death, but I felt like I needed some time alone with Chris. I had killed the engine so we could talk, and we were just drifting in the bay.
       "I'm going to college," he said. "Did you think I wasn't?"
       "No, I knew you were going to college. Where, though?" I asked.
       "I just figured it would be UM," he said.
       "University of Montana?" I asked.
       "Yeah. Why don't you come up there?" he asked.
       "No, we can't do that. We have to go to college in New Orleans. But what I was thinking was, why don't you come down and go to college there with us?" I said.
       "What's the name of the college?" he asked.
       "Tim and Brian want to go to Tulane University, and Jus and I want to go to the University of New Orleans," I said. "You could go to either one, and there are some others there, too, I think. In fact, I know there are."
       "That would be sort of cool, wouldn't it?" he said.
       "Oh, man, it would be way cool," I said.
       "Would you live in the French Quarter?" he asked.
       "Naw. We're thinking about living with Kevin's parents. They have a nice apartment over their garage. It's got three bedrooms. Only one bathroom, though," I said.
       "That would be a lot of people with only one bathroom," he said.
       "Would you have a problem with taking a shit while two of us were in the shower?" I asked.
       "No, not a bit," he said. "Not you guys."
       "You wouldn't have a problem living with two gay couples, would you?" I asked.
       "Kyle, I'm not even going to answer that, you asshole," he said, grinning.
       "I didn't think you did, but I wanted to make sure, you know?"
       "Well, now you know for sure. I would not have trouble living with four of the people on this earth that I love the most, even if they are an abomination to all that's holy," he said.
       "If I have to push you in, just know I'm starting up the boat and backing over you," I said.
       "Yeah, right," he said.
       We both laughed.
       "What are you thinking you're going to major in?" I asked.
       "Believe it or not, I'm actually thinking about physical therapy," he said. "At least I've been there, you know? Either that, or maybe hospital administration. I think that might be fun."
       "Hospital administration must be a lot like hospitality administration. A hospital is sort of like a specialized hotel, in a way," I said.
       "Yeah, a lot like one, without the bellhops," he said.
       "They got the orderlies, though. We serve room service; they serve bed pans," I said.
       "They serve room service in hospitals, too," he said.
       "True," I said. "To all the guests, I guess."
       "Have you ever been in a hospital?" he asked.
       "Of course I have," I said.
       "No, I meant as a patient," he said.
       "No, thank God. I know you have, though, huh?"
       "Yeah, I have, for my surgery. It was just a couple of days, though. You know, the more I think about it, the more hospital administration appeals to me," he said. "Hell, I don't know what I want to do when I grow up."
       "I really think you ought to think about coming with us to New Orleans, though. We'll find you a major, and we'll get you a job in a hotel when you're finished, if that's what you want," I said. "Whatever you major in."
       "I know you're teasing me, but I really do feel like I have a safety net under me because of you guys," he said.
       "I wasn't teasing you. You're part of the family, man. You'll always be," I said. "I wish you didn't have to go home."
       "I know. Me, too, but I do. I'm kind of anxious to get back to my job. I'm saving up for a car, you know," he said.
       "Yeah, I know. How much have you got?" I asked.
       "Not much. I figure I'll have about eight hundred because of this trip and working at the Laguna, but I figure I'm going to need about four thousand. My parents said they'd put up half, but I have to put up the other half. Up front. No financing. And there's insurance, too. They said they would pay that, though," he said.
       "Do you think you'll get it by Christmas?" I asked.
       "That's what I'm counting on. That'll be my Christmas present, too. That's a pretty good one, though, don't you think?"
       "A car is a good present any time you get one. I wish I could give you my old car, but it's a lease. My daddy just let me keep it for the summer so you and Paddy would have some wheels. It's got to go back just as soon as Paddy leaves," I said.
       "Kyle, I love driving that Mazda," he said. "I like that little swinging air conditioner vent thing."
       "I know. That's good. Chris, I'd give you that fucking car in a heartbeat, if my daddy would let me. But I know he won't let me give it to you. I got my big-ass new car for my graduation, and I really like it, but stuff like that doesn't mean that much to me. I would have been content to keep the Mazda," I said.
       "I appreciate that. You're rich, aren't you?" he said.
       "I'm not going there. That is never, ever going to be an issue between me and my friends, and I mean that, now, you hear me?"
       "But you are, aren't you?"
       "Goddamn it, Chris, I'm going to have to fling that ass of yours right off this boat," I said.
       He was laughing at me.
       "No, you're not," he said.
       "No, I'm not," I said. "But really, Chris, please don't ever bring that up again. Let's just say, my family has resources a lot of families don't have, and leave it at that, okay? But, see, you're part of my family, so you got 'em, too."
       I looked at my watch.
       "Let's go in. We've got time to check the crab traps one more time before it gets too dark to see what the hell we're doing." And we went in.
       * * *
       Driving the boat back, I kept thinking about Chris and that car. I just knew there was some way I could give it to him, but it wouldn't come. Then, all of a sudden, it hit me. I could buy the lease and then turn around and lease it to him.
       I knew my daddy would never let me give somebody a car. He had a strong belief that if you give your friends major gifts like that, you'll lose that person as a friend. Of course, you could say that he basically gave Kevin and Rick their house. He made them sign over their old house to him, and he called the difference their signing bonus. That's how he got around things like that.
       As soon as we got home, Chris went outside with the others. I got busy on the Internet. I found out that to buy out my lease, it would cost me about nine thousand dollars. If I financed the nine thousand over five years, it would be just a little over two hundred dollars a month. I could lease it to him for what the payment would be, or I could sell it to him over five years for the same amount. It seemed totally doable to me.
       I called his daddy.
       "Hey, Ralph. It's me, Kyle," I said.
       "Is something wrong?" Ralph said.
       "No, it's all good. I just wanted to talk to you about a car for Chris," I said.
       I outlined my idea, and he seemed to think it would work. They would put up half the money, like they told Chris they would.
       "The only thing is, Kyle, I wanted him to pay his half up front," he said.
       "Why?" I asked.
       "I think it would help develop his character," he said.
       I took a big chance.
       "Mr. Uhle, . . . Dr. Uhle, I mean, I'm all about character, sir, but you've got the character king on your hands with him."
       "Kyle . . . "
       "Sir, let me finish, okay? I know you want Chris to work so he can appreciate what he gets for his money. My daddy is the same way when it comes to working. He put me to work in the summer four years ago, and I've worked every summer since then. And I believe in work, too. But Chris is going to have to work to come up with his half of the payment, don't you see? Mr. Uhle, that boy has more courage and more character than anybody I've ever known in my life. Don't you see that from what he's done?" I said.
       There was a long pause at his end.
       "Dr. Uhle, are you still there?" I asked.
       "Yeah, I'm here, Kyle. I've just been thinking. Go for it, son," he said.
       "Well, it ain't a done deal yet. I gotta get my daddy to agree to it, and it's too late tonight for me to drive over there to talk to him. It'll be tomorrow before it's final, if it's final at all," I said.
       "Okay, but keep me posted, all right?"
       "Yes, sir, I will. Every step of the way," I said.
       "And Kyle, thank you for loving my son," he said.
       "This ain't love. This is a business deal," I said.
       "Bullshit, Kyle," he said.
       "Okay, maybe a little bit of love, but more business than love," I said.
       "Whatever," he said, laughing, and we said goodbye.
       * * *
       I went out to the pool after I talked to Dr. Uhle.
       "Where the hell have you been?" Justin asked.
       He had caught onto the EBG, the Emerald Beach Grumble, and he was using it.
       "I've been having a bowel movement, that's what. What's it to you?" I grumbled back.
       "You must have stunk up the whole house, taking that long," he said.
       "I'll give you the details later," I said.
       "That's all right. I don't really need 'em," he said.
       "Kyle, watch this," Brian said.
       He got Trixie up on the diving board. He did something with his hand, and she did a backward flip into the pool.
       "Damn, Bubba," I said. "That was awesome."
       Brian grinned. He knew Trixie was cute, and he loved it when we praised her.
       The next morning I went to see my daddy. He doesn't do business over the phone. He wants to see you face to face, man to man.
       I had called ahead to make sure he could see me, and he seemed pretty excited I was there.
       "Let's go meet the people here," he said. "You haven't been here before, have you?"
       "No, sir, I haven't."
       "Well, it's about time they found out who 'and Son' is in 'Goodson and Son, Inc.,'" he said.
       I wasn't really sure what he was talking about, but he paraded me around to meet all of the people in the office. We met the desk clerks, the bell captain, all of 'em.
       "This is Kyle Goodson, the 'and Son' in 'Goodson and Son,'" he said. If he said it once, he said it fifty times. It was so obvious he was so damn proud of me he could bust. I didn't say anything. I just shook hands with every one of them and grinned my face off.
       I noticed the bellhops had on shorts and deck shoes without socks. That was damn sure an innovation we could use at the Laguna. I made a mental note of that. They didn't do their job any less better than we did, either. That was actually a bigger and nicer hotel than the Laguna, which was our biggest and nicest one in Emerald Beach. No wonder my daddy wanted it.
       "Let's get some coffee. You want to?" he asked me.
       "Yes, sir," I said.
       Sure, Daddy, I thought. Let's waste the whole damn day, so I'll be sure not to make a cent in tips today. But I had it to do.
       We got a table with the Director of Sales, the Catering Director, and the F & B Director. They were just as pleasant and nice as they could be, but that catering guy was so gay.
       When we finally got into his office, he was all business.
       "What can I do for you, son?"
       I explained my deal with the car.
       "How are you going to get it there?" he asked.
       Shit, I hadn't thought of that.
       "Could it be shipped?"
       "Sure, but that costs money. Who's going to pay for that?"
       "Daddy, I hadn't thought about that, but I guess they'll have to," I said.
       He got all excited, but in a good way. He wasn't mad, or anything.
       "See, Kyle, that's a detail, and you need to think of all the details in a business deal, son," he said.
       "Yes, sir," I said.
       "Son, it sounds to me like you got most of this thing covered. Did you talk to his daddy about it?"
       "Yes, sir, last night. He thinks it's a good plan," I said.
       "Have you talked to Chris about it?"
       "Not specifically about him buying it, or leasing it, but he loves the car. He told me so on the boat yesterday afternoon," I said. "That's when I got the idea to do it."
       "I say lets go with it. It's good business, Kyle. He gets a car. We don't lose any money. And you don't lose a friend. I'd like to see us make a dollar or two, but that's not important," he said.
       "How about if I sell it to him for a dollar more than it'll cost me?" I asked.
       "That satisfies the urge to make money, Son. Do it, Kyle. I guess I'm going to have to sign something, right?"
       "Yes, sir. You're the leaser, not me," I said. "I think maybe you'll be selling the car to me, but maybe not."
       "Get it worked up. Go through the dealership. They know how to do this kind of thing. Can you stay for lunch?" he asked.
       I didn't want to, but I knew he wanted me to stay.
       "Yes, sir, I can stay, if you'll have me," I said.
       He stood up. "Come here to me," he said.
       I walked over to him, kind of scared because of the way he had said that. He grabbed me in a huge hug.
       "Kyle, I'm so fucking proud of you, I can hardly stand it, Son," he said. "You're a natural-born businessman, sure enough."
       I didn't know about that. He was hugging me hard, and it hurt a little bit. But that was okay. I hoped that what he said was true.
       We had lunch at a really nice restaurant in Destin, and four other guys joined us. He did the "this is the 'And Son'" thing again, and those guys laughed politely. One was a judge, one was a doctor, and two were businessmen. Every one of them was wearing a business suit, and I was wearing my uniform. I did okay in the table-manners department, though, but that damn lunch lasted an hour and a half. I was glad I had told Rooney on the phone that I had some personal business to attend to with my dad. He understood.
       * * *
       "Where the fuck have you been?!" Justin said when I got back to the Laguna.
       "I had some business with my daddy this morning, that's where I've been," I said.
       "And you couldn't call? Tim and I have been worried to death about you," he said.
       "Tim knew I was going to Destin this morning," I said.
       "Yeah, we knew you were going to Destin, but it's two o'clock in the fucking afternoon, Kyle," he said.
       "I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was that late, and I should have called. I'm sorry," I said.
       "What were you doing, anyway?" he asked.
       "I was setting it up so Chris can have my car, that's what I was doing," I said.
       "The Land Cruiser?"
       "No, the Mazda," I said. "I thought it was going to be a half hour, but I had to meet all these people and then go out to lunch with him and some of his friends. I'm sorry I didn't call. I'll do better next time. Where's Tim?"
       "If he ain't at the bell desk, he must be on a call," Jus said.
       Tim came down to the bell desk just as I got there.
       "Hey," he said. "You got hung up, didn't you?"
       "Yeah, I did. I'm sorry I didn't call," I said.
       "I knew where you were. Your dad paraded you all over, didn't he?" Tim asked.
       "Yeah," I said.
       "I figured he'd do that. I wasn't worried," he said.
       "Justin was all over my ass for not calling," I said.
       "I know. He loves you, Kyle, and he was worried about you. He doesn't understand how it is, though," Tim said.
       "But you do, don't you?"
       "Yeah. I understand. And he will, too, in time. So, do you want to move to Destin?" he said.
       "That is a damn fine hotel. Better than this one. We need to go over there to eat one night. Maybe even check in," I said.
       "I can do that. Kyle, I want to kiss you so bad right now," Tim said.
       "I know. Me, too. Later, though, okay?"
       "Definitely later," he said.
       I was hard as a rock, and I was pumping out pre-cum. Damn, I thought. I need to get my dick under control.
       The last one I had to convince about the car was Chris, and that took, like, thirty seconds. He was totally happy with the deal.
       "Now remember. You owe me money every month," I said.
       "I know, but what if I don't pay?" he asked.
       "I'll have to fly up to Montana, spend a few weeks evaluating the situation, and then decide what to do," I said.
       "I'll pay," he said.
       "I know. I guess I don't get a trip to see you. Shit," I said.
       "You can always come up to make sure I'm taking good care of it," he said.
       "That's an idea. I might have to schedule quarterly maintenance trips to check on it," I said.
       He laughed, and I did, too.
       "Kyle, you're incredible. Thank you so much," he said.
       "Don't thank me? It's a business deal. That's it. Bottom line," I said.
       "Yeah, right," he said.
       * * *
       While Chris and Dave were here, we took some extra time off. Jeff and Ty were real good about working extra so we could get off early a few times. We took them to Gulf World, ZooWorld, and the water park during the day. Denny was the pool boy at the Laguna. One of three, actually, so he could get off whenever he wanted to. Trouble was, he didn't get paid when he was off, so he almost never came with us. We didn't get paid, either, and we missed out on tips, too, but Tim and I were willing to do that to be with Chris and Dave. Brian and Justin always managed to be off when we were, too. Plus, I didn't really need the money, and, because I didn't, Tim didn't, either.
       "I got hit on today," Chris said on one of our adventures, while we were eating lunch.
       "Boy or girl?" Justin asked.
       "Girl. Woman, really. Probably old enough to be my mother," he said.
       "So, did you get laid?" Justin asked.
       "Does a blowjob count?" Chris asked.
       "Hell, yeah, it counts," Jus said.
       "Did that really happen?" Tim asked.
       "No, but it could have," Chris said.
       We all laughed.
       "I get hit on all the time," I said. "Usually by real faggy men, though, not women. Now and then a woman, but not usually."
       "I do, too, now and then," Justin said. "Is there some movie out about hotel workers being easy scores, or something?"
       "Not that I know of," I said. "I guess we just have so much sex appeal they can't resist us."
       We all laughed.
       "Jeff told me that one time he had to deliver room service, and the guy was just in a bathrobe. The robe was open, and he didn't have on underwear or anything. He said the guy sat in a chair and opened his legs. He showed Jeff the goods. He wanted Jeff to put the napkin in his lap," Tim said.
       "What did Jeff do?" I asked.
       "He told the man 'no' and got the hell out of there. He didn't even get a tip for his trouble," Tim said.
       We laughed.
       "Did y'all ever walk in on somebody naked?" I asked. "I mean, they were naked, not you."
       "I've done that a few times," Tim said.
       We all said we had, too.
       "Why do they open the damn door?" I asked.
       "'Cause they want some of you, that's why," Justin said. "Why else would they do it?"
       "My dogs don't ever come on to me," Brian said.
       "Woof, woof. I guess not. I don't know why, though. You're a cute little doggy, Brian," I said. I ruffled his hair.
       "Kyle, I'm going to doggy you if you don't stop messing with my hair," Bri said.
       "Brian, I love it doggy style," I said.
       "You love it any way you can get it," Justin said. "Ain't that right, Tim?"
       "I'm not saying a word," Tim said. "Leave me out of this."
       If we had as much sex as we talked about it, they'd have to open a special Raw Dick Clinic at the hospital just for us. It was fun playing and joking about it, though.

(Kevin's Perspective)
       The atmosphere in the den the afternoon that Chris and Dave left was positively funereal. It was a Monday after a big holiday weekend, and that would have been bad enough. But I knew they were all missing the Montana boys.
       "Come on, boys. We need to perk up," I said. "This silence is starting to get to me."
       "Sorry. I'm just thinking about Chris," Kyle said.
       "Did you and he get it all worked out about the car?" I asked.
       "Yes, sir. We're going to ship it at the end of August, right after Paddy leaves," Kyle said. "It's all taken care of."
       "Good. And his dad was satisfied with the price and all?" I asked.
       "Yes, sir. I came down a little bit on the price, though," Kyle said.
       "Did Ralph negotiate, or did Chris?" I asked.
       "Neither one. I'm the guilty party. Don't tell my dad, though, okay? I figured it was mine, once I bought out the lease, and I could take a few bucks off the price," he said.
       "How much did you take off?" I asked.
       "Enough," Kyle said.
       He said that with a certain finality that let me know he wasn't interested in discussing it any further.
       "Can we call Rob?" Brian asked.
       I thought that was a great idea. Rick had talked to Craig several times, and I had talked to Cherie every day since she had gotten home from the hospital, but we hadn't talked to them as a family since we had talked to Craig the morning Rob was born. I noticed Brian had said "Rob," not "Cherie and Craig."
       Rick dialed the number, and Cherie answered. We had her on speaker, of course.
       She was happy to hear from us, and she had Rob in her arms.
       "Pinch him so we can hear his voice," Justin said.
       "Justin, I'm not going to pinch this baby," she said, laughing at his foolishness.
       "Well, make him talk to us," Jus said.
       "He's actually nursing right now," she said.
       Justin looked at Kyle, and they both grinned. There was devilment on those two faces.
       "Don't say it, Justin. Kyle," Rick said.
       "You guys are awful," Cherie said.
       "No, we're not. We're cute," Kyle said.
       "Yes, you are, actually. Your cousin is going to worship you guys," she said.
       "I know, and I can't wait to see him. We've got two damn weeks to wait, too," Kyle said.
       "When are you coming?" she asked.
       "A week from this coming Friday. Brian has his summer school exam on that Thursday, and we're heading out on Friday morning," I said.
       "Great. We're eager to see you guys," she said.
       * * *
       The two weeks passed quickly. The boys went to work every day, just like Rick and I did, and, in the evenings, we all pursued our interests. We didn't stay up late because we were all tired from our days, but we had our usual evenings in the den. We watched a lot of Braves baseball on TV, and it was rarely riveting. When you watch the same team, over and over again, you learn a lot about them, but you don't get many great plays. Those only come on highlights.
       The only major diversion during that time was the arrival of the advance copy of Kyle's book. They had made a mistake and had spelled his name "Godson" on the dustjacket. He was on the phone to his editor in an instant, and she assured him that the mistake had already been taken care of.
       The book was magnificent, and Kyle was proud. He and Tim drove over to Destin that afternoon to show his parents, and they stopped at George and Sonya's to show it to them on the way home.
       "I'm sorry, but I cannot believe this. Somebody I know wrote a fucking book?" Justin said.
       "I know. It's pretty amazing, isn't it? And the sad part is, I can't even read it," Kyle said.
       "I know. Me, neither," Justin said. "But it's got some good pictures."
       "Find the one of you naked eating the watermelon. That's one of my favorites," Kyle said.
       "Is that one in here?" Jus asked.
       "You signed the permission thing," Kyle said.
       "I signed a bunch of those. I didn't read 'em," he said.
       "It's a good picture. They've got that one on the wall in the gallery," Kyle said.
       "For real?"
       "Yeah, for real. And when it sells, you're going to get a model fee," Kyle said.
       "Cool. I can always use the money. Who they going to sell it to?" Justin asked.
       "I don't know. Whoever wants to buy it, that's who," Kyle said.
       "How much?" Justin asked.
       "It's priced at three thousand," Kyle said.
       "Three thousand dollar? No way!" Jus said.
       "No. Three thousand pennies. Yeah, three thousand dollars, asshole. You think I work cheap?" Kyle said.
       "Nobody's going to buy it," Jus said.
       "I don't know about that. They've bought some others that were that much. A big stud horse like you naked? Shit, they could get twice that much for it," Kyle said. "They would, too, if it wasn't in the book. Do you know how much this book is going to sell for?"
       "No. How much?" Jus asked.
       "Eighty-five dollars."
       "I'm sorry, Kyle. Your pictures are good, man, but that's way too much for me to pay for a book," Jus said.
       "I wouldn't buy one, either," Kyle said. "But that's what it's going to cost."
       "How much of that do you get?"
       "Not all that much, really. Ten percent of the wholesale price, which I guess means I get $4.25 a book. That's about what it usually is, anyway. So if they sell all three thousand copies, I'll get somewhere around thirteen thousand dollars," Kyle said.
       "Is that all?" I asked.
       "That's what they told me, Kevin," Kyle said. "I was surprised, too, because the total retail on that is $225,000.00. I had my shyster check it out, and she told me that was right. I trust her, too."
       "Your shyster? What the fuck is that?" Justin asked.
       "My lawyer. Cherie, man," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, I think the word 'shyster' means 'dishonest lawyer,'" Kevin said.
       "Oh, I didn't know that. I thought that was just another word for lawyer. Shit, she ain't a shyster, then, that's for sure," Kyle said.
       "So, what's the difference between a lawyer and an attorney?" Justin asked. "They use both of those words."
       "I don't know, but Cherie is both. So is Craig," Kyle said.
       "Guys, the word 'attorney' means somebody who has the legal authority to act on somebody else's behalf. Rick and I have durable power of attorney for each other, which means that we can act on each other's behalf if we're ever disabled or sick or something, and can't act for ourselves. A lawyer is somebody who has been trained in the law. Anybody can be an attorney, as in power of attorney for somebody else, but only people who have been admitted to the bar can be lawyers," I said.
       "Admitted to the bar? I've always heard that, but what does that mean?" Kyle asked.
       "Kyle, I don't know where the term comes from, but the bar is what lawyers have to be admitted to. They have to go to law school and pass a major exam to be admitted," I said.
       "I guess this ain't like a drinking bar," Justin said.
       "That's highly debatable," Rick said.
       I laughed, but the kids didn't.
       "No, it's not a drinking bar, Jus. I think it actually refers to the courtroom. When I've watched trials on Court TV, they have side-bar conferences, and that's when the lawyers huddle around the judge's bench, kind of on the side and not open to the people in the courtroom. I assume the 'bar' is the judge's desk," I said.
       "Guys, one thing that Kevin just said is very important to you all," Rick said.
       "What?" Kyle asked.
       "Well, he and I have a springing durable power of attorney over the other one's affairs, including medical stuff and the property we own. We consider ourselves married, but we don't have the legal rights that straight married couples have. The closest we can get to married status in terms of the law is a durable power of attorney. Kyle, I know your dad knows about all of this, and he has springing durable power of attorney over you. But just as soon as Tim turns eighteen, that needs to be transferred to him, if that's what you want. The same with you, Justin and Brian," Rick said.
       "Who's got that for me now?" Justin asked.
       "Nobody, Bubba," Kevin said. "We need to talk to Craig and Cherie about that for you the next time we see them. That's important."
       "Rick, what does springing durable power of attorney mean?" Kyle asked. "I've heard of power of attorney, and I even had to sign that when I turned eighteen. What do you mean by 'springing durable?'"
       "You're going to have to get the lawyers to explain it fully, Kyle, but what I understand is an ordinary power of attorney expires as soon as a doctor certifies that you're incapacitated, like in an accident or sickness or something. A durable power of attorney doesn't end when that happens. The 'springing' part means it only springs into action when you are incapacitated. In other words, as long as Kevin can act for himself, I can't make him get circumcised, let's say. Not that I ever would, mind you. But that's just an example," Rick said.
       "I'd never make Tim get cut, either. That's my little play toy," Kyle said.
       "I knew I had picked the wrong example as the words were leaving my mouth," Rick said. "But do you understand the concept?"
       "I think so. I was just cutting up about cutting him," Kyle said.
       We laughed.
       "If you have one of those things, will they let you see him, if he's real sick or dying or something? I know they sometimes keep the partner out," Tim said.
       "That's right, Tim, they do. Ours say point blank that we each have the rights, privileges, and responsibilities of spouses toward each other, as soon as it goes into effect," I said. "Another thing you have to do, if you're going to be partners for life, is figure out how the property is going to work."
       Kyle got very interested in that, all of a sudden.
       "What I mean is, you have to decide what the two of you are going to own jointly, with survivor's rights, and what you're going to leave to other people," I said. "In most states, the spouse automatically inherits all the property, unless there is a will that says otherwise. That doesn't work for gay couples. Kyle, if you want Tim to have your property when you die, you have to expressly say that in your will."
       "Cherie has already talked to me about that," Kyle said. "Evidently, your will can change over your lifetime, too, can't it?"
       "Oh, sure. They call those changes codicils," I said. "Kyle, for argument sake, let's say you and Tim decide you're going to be together for the rest of your lives."
       "That's already been decided, Kevin," Kyle said.
       "I know, but I'm trying to come up with a hypothetical case to make some points, okay?" I said.
       "Okay. Sorry. Go ahead," Kyle said.
       "All right. So, you and Tim have a formal, or even informal, commitment to one another, and you write your will so that everything goes to him when you die. Let's say you do that when you're twenty-five years old. Then, when you're thirty, y'all adopt a baby. Or--and this is probably going to be more likely--y'all take in a twelve-year-old foster kid to raise. You love him. You consider him to be your son. And then when the kid's twenty-two, Tim dies. You can't leave your property to Tim anymore. You want to leave it to this boy. That's when you can change your will to leave everything to him, if that's what you want to do," I said.
       I could tell from the look on his face and from his general demeanor that this was making Kyle think. He was the only one of them who actually had anything to leave to anybody, at that point, at least, and what we were talking about was obviously important to him.
       "I never thought about him dying before me," Kyle said. "You know who I'm thinking about, don't you?"
       "Clay and Jeff?" I asked.
       "Yeah. My daddy had to lie to the people at the hospital so Jeff could go in to see Clay. That's just wrong," Kyle said. "He had to tell them Jeff was his brother."
       "I didn't know that, Kyle," I said.
       "Yeah," he said softly. "This money shit is so fucking complicated, I could scream every time I have to think about it. Kevin, you know I love Cherie to death, but she is fucking relentless with this shit, man. I'm on the phone with her every week, it seems like, about this kind of shit."
       "That's her job, Kyle. That's why you pay her, Son," Rick said.
       "I know, Rick. But it still ain't easy. I thank Jesus Christ it's her, but it still ain't easy thinking about Tim dying. Especially after what happened to my brother," he said.
       "You thank Jesus Christ for lawyers? I thought we were supposed to hate 'em," Justin said.
       "Let me ask you something, mister. Did you hate her and Craig when they came over here and got you ready for that goddamn trial? Huh?" Kyle asked.
       "Kyle, don't get mad, man. You know I love them as much as you do," Justin said. "That was a bad joke, okay?"
       "Okay, but it pisses me off bad when I hear lawyer jokes like that. Yeah, they're the devil, until you need one. Then you're happy to have 'em," Kyle said.
       "Guys, let's calm this down, okay," I said. "Everybody loves Craig and Cherie, and what Kyle said is right. They know how to do things legally, and we can't get by without lawyers. Why don't we all take some deep breaths to calm down, go outside, get undressed, and play in the pool?"
       "That's a good idea," Rick said. "I just want to make one more point, though. When Chuck's house burned down, we were able to get to all the important papers because they were in a safety deposit box at a bank. What we've been talking about--powers of attorney, wills, all that stuff--are documents. Pieces of paper. They need to be in a safety deposit box in the vault of a bank. You guys are going to need those. Let's go swim."
       The boys went ahead of Rick and me out to the pool.
       "Whoa!" I said.
       "I know. It got pretty intense, but they need to know this kind of stuff, Babe," Rick said.
       "Oh, I know they do. Every gay couple needs to know this stuff, and they're not too young to hear it," I said.
       "Cherie must be a damn good lawyer," he said.
       "If you ever say this, I'll kill you, but she's better than my beloved brother, and that's a fact," I said.
       "I agree, and Craig's my best friend," he said.
       "I know."

Chapter 10

(Rick's Perspective)
       Summer began for us in Emerald Beach on Memorial Day, and it ended on Labor Day. The weatherman didn't know that, of course, and we had highs in the eighties in March. For that matter, we had highs in the nineties in October, but summer officially consisted of the three glorious months of June, July, and August.
       A lot was going on that summer. It started with Kyle's graduation, and it continued through the visit of Chris and Dave. July Fourth was the pinnacle. Not only was it Independence Day, and our busiest weekend of the year at work, but it was also Justin's nineteenth birthday and the day Rob was born. Any one of those events would have been cause for high emotion, but, put together, they were almost overwhelming.
       Kevin and I had been in love for a long time. We had pledged our undying love and commitment to one another over two years before. But in the time from January till July of that year, I had a sense that we were growing even closer. A sense that our love was beginning to mature into something I had never dreamed of.
       And the expressions of that love were becoming both more frequent and more subtle. When we were first together, we would have sex, and I would think, "That was fun." By that summer, we would not have sex, and I would think, "This man makes me who I am." We were older, of course, and that probably contributed to what I was thinking. But the urgency to arrive at orgasm was gradually waning. Now, holding him in bed, or having him hold me, was often enough. Two, three, even four times a week, that would lead to orgasm, but just being together, just holding each other and caring for each other was often enough.
       We didn't talk about it, really, because we didn't have to. We each knew the other was the most important thing in our lives, and that gave us peace and tranquility with one another. We had to be a team for the boys, and we were definitely growing in that regard. It wasn't without family disagreements, though.
       "Brian, you know the rules about the dogs upstairs," Kevin said one morning.
       "Yeah, I know, but I thought Krewe was sick," Brian said.
       "So, what were you thinking, Bri? It would be better if she vomited or shit in y'all's bed than down here?" Kevin asked him.
       "I thought I could take care of her better if she was in bed with us," Brian said.
       "No, Brian. You love them, but not everybody feels the way you do about them. We don't want the dogs upstairs. Period. End of discussion," Kevin said.
       He grumbled a little bit under his breath.
       "Did you want to say something to me, Brian?"
       "No!" he said. He was adamant.
       "Brian, come here," Kevin said.
       "Kevin, I don't know why you're picking on me," he said.
       "I'm not picking on you, Brian, but you broke a rule, man. You know what the rules are about the dogs, and you broke them. Admit it," Kevin said.
       "But I thought she was sick," he said.
       "I know you did, and I want you to take care of her when she's sick. But do it down here, okay?"
       He was silent for a long time.
       "Okay. Are you mad at me?"
       "I'm angry at what you did, Bri, but I'm not angry at you personally," Kevin said.
       "I won't do it again, Kevin," Brian said.
       "Okay, Bubba," Kevin said.
       Kevin gave him a kiss on his forehead, and Brian smiled.
       Another time it was Kyle and Justin we had to get onto. Actually, on that particular occasion, Tim and Brian were much more pissed off with them than Kevin and I were.
       It was a Friday night, and the two couples were supposed to go out together. It wasn't a special occasion or anything, just a movie and to get something to eat, but Tim and Brian were counting on it and were looking forward to it. The usual time for Kyle and Justin to get home from work came and went.
       "I wonder where they are," Tim asked.
       "Why didn't you ride home with them?" I asked Tim.
       "I had some errands to run for my dad, so I drove my car today, and Kyle drove him and Justin to work," Tim said. "Paddy drove himself in the Mazda."
       "They might have stopped for something," Kevin said.
       "Maybe so," Tim said.
       Time passed. Tim and Brian were both reading and watching TV with Denny and Paddy, but I noticed each of them looked at their watches more than usual.
       "Why don't you call them," I said.
       "We already did. They're not answering their phones," Brian said. "I'll bet Justin's battery is dead, and Kyle probably left his phone in the car."
       "Why don't you guys go ahead," Kevin said. "You don't have to miss the movie just because they aren't here. Take Denny and Paddy, too, why don't you?"
       "But what if something has happened?" Tim said. "Shouldn't we stay here in case they need us?"
       Nine o'clock turned into ten o'clock, and ten o'clock turned into eleven, and we finally heard the two of them coming in the back door. They both came into the den in great moods, laughing and joking.
       "Shit!" Kyle said when he saw the looks on our faces.
       "Where have you been?" Tim asked. His voice was calm, but I could tell he was angry. So could Kyle.
       "Babe, we forgot," Kyle said. "Gary and Allen from work asked us to go bowling with them, and we did. I thought you called them," he said to Justin.
       "I tried, but the line was busy. We were supposed to go out tonight, weren't we?" Justin asked. "Little Buddy, I'm sorry, man."
       "Why didn't you try again," Brian asked, "if it was busy the first time?"
       "Because I forgot," Justin said. "Are you mad at me?"
       "Yes, I am, Justin," Brian said. "I was worried."
       "I was worried, too," Tim said. "Kyle, you've never done this before. You just totally forgot we had a date?"
       "Yeah, and I feel like shit about it, too," Kyle said. "I'm sorry, Babe."
       "I'm sorry, too, Little Buddy," Justin said. "We can go out tomorrow night, okay?"
       Justin put his arm around Brian's neck. Brian didn't shake it off, but he didn't respond in any way, either.
       "Well, it's not that big a deal, but please don't do this again, okay?" Tim said.
       "I won't. Believe me," Kyle said. "We would have had a much better time with you two."
       "I won't, either," Justin said.
       Kyle and Justin looked so sorrowful and miserable that it was actually cute.
       "Are you still mad at me?" Justin asked, in a truly pathetic voice.
       Tim and Brian looked at one another and grinned.
       "Yes, and for your penance say three Our Fathers and three Hail Marys," Brian said.
       Kevin, Tim, and I laughed. Kyle, the new Catholic, looked a bit confused, and Justin didn't know what the hell he was talking about.
       "What are y'all laughing at?" Justin asked.
       "It's a Catholic thing, Jus," Kevin said.
       "It is?" Kyle asked.
       "You guys better do your penance, if you want to be forgiven," Tim said, still chuckling a bit.
       "You're not really mad anymore, are you?" Kyle asked Tim.
       "No. Come here, you lug," Tim said, and he hugged Kyle. Brian followed suit and hugged Jus.
       "Do we need to talk about lessons learned?" Kevin asked.
       "No, I don't think so," Justin said. "I learned I don't want to ever make him mad at me again."
       "Neither me," Kyle said.
       "I don't know about y'all, but I'm going to bed," I said.
       "I'm with you," Kevin said.
       The boys stayed up a while longer, and I heard laughing coming from the den while I was trying to get to sleep. That was a good sound.

(Paddy's Perspective)
       When I first started to realize that I might be gay, when I was about fourteen, I panicked. I had been masturbating for a couple of years, which was bad enough in itself, according to my religion, but more and more I started imagining myself doing it with another boy. At first, the boy was just male, and all I could focus on in my mind was his penis. Gradually, though, he started developing facial features that looked just like a guy named Vito, who was in my grade in school.
       Vito was Italian, but he was a blond Italian, with blue eyes and beautiful olive skin. He lived in the next block up from us, and he was a jock's jock. I was lousy at sports, and Vito was great at them. He almost never gave me the time of day at school, except to borrow my homework from time to time so he could copy it, and we never hung out in the neighborhood, either. He had a basketball goal over the door of his garage, and, in the summer, I used to ride my bike back and forth in front of his house if he was outside shooting hoops. He usually wore just shorts and no shirt when he did that, and I would stare for all I was worth. To me, he was the quintessence of masculinity. He even had tuffs of blond hair under his arms, and I thought that was the best.
       Because I was masturbating so much, I went to confession a lot. Eventually, the priest told me it wasn't really that big a deal, but for a while I felt terrible guilt over that. Finally, one time I told him I thought about Vito when I did it. I didn't say his name, of course, because I knew the priest knew him. Vito was the only Italian in the eighth grade in a very Irish parish, and I knew the priest would know who it was if I said his name.
       He told me a lot of boys develop crushes on other boys and for me not to worry about it. But I did worry about it. What if I was a homosexual? How could I possibly live a happy life and be that? I was depressed all the time about that, and I felt as though everybody hated me, even though they didn't know.
       My brother, Tony, and I were pretty close in age. He was three years younger than I was, and, as I got older, I started noticing his body more and more. I didn't want to have sex with him, or anything like that, but we shared a room. Tony masturbated in bed at night, usually right after we turned off the light, and I could hear him. I took every chance to see him naked, especially in the morning when he always had an erection. Eventually, he noticed.
       "I think you're a fag. I hate fags," he said.
       "I'm no more of a fag than you are. I hear you jerking off at night," I said.
       "So, you're spying on me, right? I'm telling Mom and Dad," he said.
       And he did.
       "Do you think you're gay, Paddy?" my dad asked me. It was him, Mom, and Tony.
       "I don't know," I said, and I started crying.
       "He is. I know he is," Tony said. "He's a fag, Dad."
       "Paddy, if you're gay, it's not going to matter to Mom and me," my dad said.
       "Then, yes, I am," I said. "I know I am."
       Tony got furious, slapped his hand down on the kitchen table, and stormed out of the room.
       My parents were good about it. They told me they loved me and that they would always love me. They said they hoped I would be happy and that I always had a place to live with them, if I wanted to. They were just great.
       My brother gave me no peace, though. At least until last summer when my cousin Tim came to visit. Tim is gay, and he punched out Tony on the road into town because Tony was being obnoxious about that. That was pretty dramatic, but Tony deserved it. And I think the fact that a gay guy did it startled Tony. My other two cousins, Steve and Billy Cook, didn't lift a finger to help Tony, and I didn't, either. We liked Tim a lot, and Tony deserved what he got. Later in the week, though, Tim and Tony patched it up, and they became the best of friends. Tony let up on harassing me, too, after that. He never said he accepted the fact that I was gay in so many words, but he said it in every other way.
       To make a long story short, I got to move to Emerald Beach for the summer. Tim didn't officially live with Kevin and Rick, but he and his boyfriend, Kyle, were there all the time. I saw my cousin, George Murphy, often, but I was definitely living with Kevin Foley and Rick Mashburn. And all of their gay household.
       I had been there for George's wedding, so I knew they had a nice place. Somebody in that crowd had money, and it was obvious in the kind of house they had. But the house and the money and whatever else they had in material things were nothing compared to the love and brotherhood in that place. I was the only one who didn't have a boyfriend, but that didn't matter at all to them.
       I felt real love in that house, but more than anything else, I realized I wasn't weird, strange, odd, abnormal, or a freak because I was gay. They were totally normal and ordinary, and they let me know, without saying it, that I was that way, too.
       It was all so different. They loved sports and played them all the time, but they never made fun of anybody for not being good at sports. They watched sports on TV a lot, especially baseball, but they talked the whole time, usually about who was cute or hung or whatever. Sometimes they talked real sports, too, but they never excluded me or made fun of me because I didn't know anything about the subject.
       One guy there, Denny, read constantly. He was even worse at sports than I was, but they didn't care. Another guy, Brian, was really big into dogs. In fact, he had a job training dogs. He was the best-looking one of them all, I thought, but he was so kind and unassuming that you didn't even notice his looks, after a while. Kyle and Justin were incredibly funny, and they were both pretty big boys. They weren't all that tall, but they were solid and muscular.
       Then Chris and Dave came to visit. Chris was crippled a little bit, and those boys, especially Kyle, treated him like he was Jesus Christ or something. Chris was straight, but his brother, Dave, was gay. Straight? Gay? It didn't matter to them.
       One time Kevin and I were the only two in the den.
       "How's it going, Paddy?" Kevin asked.
       "It's going great," I said.
       "Do you miss your family?" he asked.
       "Maybe a little bit, but not much," I said.
       "Are you calling them every now and then?" he asked.
       "Yeah, we talk a couple of times a week." I got quiet for a few moments. "Kevin, do you and Rick realize what you have here in your house?"
       "Maybe not. What do you mean?"
       "Kevin, this is paradise for me. These last few weeks have been the happiest time of my life. I feel so free, so accepted here. You guys are wonderful," I said. "I'm not afraid to be gay anymore."
       Kevin grinned at me.
       "That's what this house is all about, Bubba. That, and safety," he said.
       "Oh, I feel totally safe here," I said. "I know that nobody is going to mess with me here."
       "No, they won't," Kevin said.
       "They don't even make fun of me in sports," I said.
       "Paddy, when these boys play sports, they give 100%. They're not all equally talented, but they give all they've got. And that's what they expect from you. For you to give all you've got to give. Your 100% might only be 50% of what they've got, but they respect that."
       "I know," I said.
       "Tim, Brian, and I aren't nearly as competitive as those other ones are, and Denny is pretty much out of it in that regard. They never make fun of us, though. And they choose us for their teams. Sometimes first, even," Kevin said.
       "I know. Kyle chose me first for volleyball the other day. That blew my mind. I've never been chosen anything but last. Ever," I said.
       "Well, it's just different with us," Kevin said.
       "I know. I guess that's why I'm so happy here," I said.
       "Well, you're welcome here anytime, Paddy. Your cousin, Tim, has a very special place and a very precious place in our hearts, and you can come see him and us anytime you want to," Kevin said.
       * * *
       I had been hoping that I would meet somebody that I would really like that summer. I mean, I was so horny, and I really wanted to go off to UMass that fall with at least a little experience under my belt, so to speak.
       They had some friends over to swim and ski one night after work. Some of them were guys I had already met, and there were four or five I hadn't seen before. One of them was a guy from work that I had talked to casually but hadn't really gotten to know. His name was Drew McCalister.
       Drew was my age and about my size. He had just finished his freshman year at Auburn University, and he was really smart. He was actually from someplace in Alabama, but his grandparents had a beach cottage in Emerald Beach. He and two cousins of his were living there that summer. All three of them were working in hotels, but Drew was the only one of the three at the Laguna.
       We started out just talking casually that night, but we hit it off really well. He was really good looking, but there was much more to him than that. He and I talked in the pool a good bit that night, and the next day at work we took break together. He was in housekeeping, though.
       We did that a few days running, and then we decided to go to a movie. After the movie we went to a coffeehouse he knew about. We both ordered sandwiches.
       "Paddy, I want to be your friend, but you have to know something about me," he said. He had a really thick Southern accent.
       "What?" I asked.
       "I like boys," he said. He pronounced it like 'boz."
       I wasn't exactly sure what he meant at first, but he had my hopes up.
       "What do you mean?" I asked.
       "I mean, I like boys. I'm gay," he said.
       I started getting an erection.
       "Do you still want to be my friend?" he asked.
       "Drew, I like boys, too," I said.
       That was the first time I had ever said that to a stranger, and my erection peaked when I did.
       "That's what I thought. I really like you," he said.
       "I really like you, too," I said. "You could tell that?"
       "Well, just because you live with a bunch of gay guys. You know they're gay, don't you?" he said.
       "Oh, yeah," I said.
       "Would you kiss me?" he asked.
       "Right now?" I asked in disbelief.
       "No. In the car or someplace private," he said. He chuckled when he said that.
       "Yeah, I would," I said.
       "I'm aroused right now because of you," he said.
       I was a bit taken aback at that revelation, but the truth was, I was, too. Because of him.
       "Me, too," I said.
       "Would you be willing to have sex with me?" he asked.
       God! I felt like I had been hit in the head with a baseball bat. I had wanted to have sex with another boy for years, and here was one who was handsome as hell, cute, and smart. And he was asking me if I would be willing to have sex with him. It wasn't the most subtle approach I could imagine, but I guess it got the job done.
       "I guess you don't believe in being romantic," I said.
       "What's the point of that? If you say 'yes,' then I'll be romantic. But if you say 'no,' why bother with that?" he said.
       I guess he had a point.
       "What do you mean by 'have sex?'" I asked. I wasn't really interested in anal sex, but I could probably compromise, if that's what he wanted.
       "Not the anal stuff, that's for sure. At least, not screwing. You know. Just kissing, holding, rubbing. Maybe jerking each other off?" he said.
       "That could definitely happen," I said. "Where?"
       "Well, my cousins both have dates tonight. We could go to my house," he said.
       And we did. I was a little nervous, but he took the lead and showed me what to do. It wasn't his first time.
       After that night, Drew and I became boyfriends, at least for the summer. In a week or so I worked up the nerve to invite him to our house as my date, and they welcomed him like he was family. He spent the night with me that night, and the next morning they treated us like they treated one another. That was easy, and I felt like a grown-up for the first time in my life.

(Kyle's Perspective)
       The day was coming fast when we would be going to New Orleans to see our new baby. Denny hadn't wanted to go because he didn't want to miss a day of work, but Kevin and Rick made him. We left on a Friday morning, and we were there at Grandma and Grandpa's house by two o'clock in the afternoon. Cherie and Rob were there when we got there.
       "Oh, my God!" Kevin said when he saw him.
       He got first dibs with him, for good reason. He was holding little Rob and looking at him, and you could just about see the rays of love going from Kevin's face to Rob's face. Kevin passed him to Rick, and Rick did the same thing. Rick was a lot more awkward, and looked a lot more scared, holding the baby than Kevin did.
       I got him next, and he was as light as a feather. While I had him I heard him make a little baby fart, and I thought that was cute. I could smell it, too, but it didn't really bother me. Tim and Brian held him, and then Justin took a turn.
       "This baby smells funny to me," Justin said.
       "You're just smelling your upper lip," Kevin said.
       "Maybe, but I don't think so," Jus said. "I'm not an expert, but I think he might need to be changed."
       "Give him here and let me see," Cherie said. She checked him out.
       "Yep, he does," she said.
       "Take him in our bedroom, Cherie," Grandma said.
       "Can we watch?" I asked. I had never seen anybody change a baby, and I was curious.
       "You just want to see his dick," Justin whispered to me. That made me laugh.
       "What's funny?" Kevin asked.
       "I'd rather not say," Justin said.
       "Boys, you know you won't shock me. Knowing you, Jus, you probably said that Kyle just wants to see his penis," Grandma said.
       "Yes, ma'am, more or less," Justin said.
       That got a laugh from everybody. Everybody knew what the "more or less" meant.
       "You can watch, guys," Cherie said.
       She put a towel down on the bed and put Rob on it. She took off the little pants he was wearing, and then she took off his diaper. It was nasty to look at, but it didn't really smell all that bad. I expected little baby turds, but it was all soft and mushy.
       "Damn, his dick's as big as yours, Kyle," Justin said.
       "Very funny," I said.
       Cherie did think it was funny, and she laughed.
       "Don't laugh, Cherie. You'll only encourage them," Tim said.
       She got out one of those Wet Ones to clean him off. He actually had some shit on his dick, so she wiped that off, too. While she was getting a fresh diaper, he let loose a stream of piss up into the air.
       "He's pissing," Jus said, all alarmed.
       "Yeah, he does that a lot," Cherie said. "There's nothing we can do about it."
       I didn't realize babies were so messy, but that one damn sure was.
       Denny and Paddy got a turn to hold Rob once we were back in the den, but they didn't really seem all that interested. When Paddy gave him back to Cherie, she said it was time for him to eat.
       I really didn't know what I was expecting, but I got me an eyeful, that's for sure. Cherie opened her shirt and put his little head inside for him to get at her tit. I'm not one to notice girls' tits that much, but I had sure noticed hers when we first got there. They were much bigger than they had been before. I figured it was so she could feed him.
       You could hear the little fella slurping a little bit, and I started getting a fucking hard-on. How un-gay was that? I was embarrassed to death, and I was praying to God Justin and Rick didn't notice. They would give me down the country for that. Then I noticed Mr. Davis starting to swell up a little bit, too, and Mr. Mashburn, as well. I guess there were just some things you couldn't control.
       After he ate, she burped him, and he went to sleep in her arms. They had a cradle thing set up for him, and Cherie laid him down to sleep.
       "That's the cycle, guys," Cherie said. "At this point, he basically only does four things: eat, sleep, shit, and piss. You've seen all four."
       "Cherie, dear, that's not all he does," Grandma said.
       She was being real serious, and I figured she knew other stuff he did because she was a baby doctor.
       "Well, what else does he do?" Cherie asked.
       "He screams his precious little head off," Grandma said.
       We all thought that was funny.
       "Yes, you're right. How could I have forgotten that?" Cherie said.
       "Paddy, it's good to have you here," Grandma said. "We had such a good time with you and your parents at George and Sonya's wedding."
       "Thanks," Paddy said.
       Paddy was a great guy, and I loved him to death. But he didn't have Southern manners. What Grandma said was supposed to be the beginning of a conversation, and it called for more than a one-word answer. Paddy just didn't know that.
       "We had a great time with Paddy and his brother and cousins in Boston last summer, Grandma," I said. "We spent the bulk of one day on some islands with them in Boston Harbor, and that night we went to a Red Sox baseball game. The Red Sox played the Yankees, and that's a combination that's hard to beat."
       "Have you ever been to Boston, Mrs. Foley?" Paddy asked.
       "Yes, I have, Paddy," she said. "In fact, Boston is one of my favorite cities. My husband and I have been to five or six medical conferences there."
       "Is Mr. Foley a doctor?" Paddy asked.
       "She is, too," Justin said. "She's my doctor, in fact. And she makes house calls when I get sick."
       "I was there as your grandmother, not your doctor, Jus," she said.
       "I know, but if I lived here, I would want you to be my doctor," Jus said.
       "Well, you're getting a little bit old for me, Jus," she said.
       "I know I'm not a little kid anymore, but couldn't you take care of me? You took care of Jeff that time," Jus said.
       "Of course I could take care of you, if you wanted me to. Are you feeling bad?" she asked.
       "No, ma'am, not at all. I just needed to make sure," Justin said.
       "Don't your face hurt?" I asked.
       "No, why?" he said.
       "Cause it's killing me," I said.
       The first time I heard that joke I was Rob's age, but that didn't keep 'em from laughing.
       "Justin?" Grandma said.
       "Ma'am?" he said.
       "Don't you have something to say to Kyle?" she asked.
       "Oh, yeah. You got me last. Big deal," Jus said.
       * * *
       Grandpa got home about 4:30, and he was really glad to see everybody. Craig got there right after he did, and he was glad to see all of us, too.
       "I've been waiting two weeks to do this," he said.
       He had a brief case with him, and he opened it up. He took out a handful of cigars, and he started passing them around to all of us from Emerald Beach. He gave them to everybody but Kevin. Then he went back into his briefcase and pulled out this gigantic cigar that was probably fake.
       "And this one is for my brother," he said.
       They hugged, and Craig actually kissed him on the cheek. I had never seen those two do that before. Everybody knew what that giant cigar was all about. Then he gave Kevin a regular one, too.
       I looked over at Grandma, and she was crying.
       "What's the matter, Mama?" Craig asked.
       "Nothing's the matter. I'm just a little too happy right now," she said. "My two sons, and their partners, and their sons, all in the same room celebrating family. I'm sorry."
       She left the room, and Cherie, grinning her fool head off, went after her.
       "I'm happy, but I'm not that happy," Craig said. "Who wants a drink?"
       All the usual ones did. Paddy was in the "drinkers" column. That boy never turned down a drink, but he never over did it, either. I figured it was the Irish blood, only that didn't compute for Tim.
       "Kyle and Justin, give me a hand," Craig said.
       We went back to the kitchen. Miss Odille was just fixing to leave, and there was a mighty fine dinner on the stove. She had a tray of hors d'ouevres that included six stuffed artichokes, my favorites.
       "Miss Odille, why don't you come to Emerald Beach and work for us," I said. I was just teasing, but I wished she would.
       "I was all set to, Kyle, after my husband retired from the college," she said. "Then he got a job here that he absolutely could not turn down, so all bets were off. Our children and grandchildren are here, too, and that was a factor."
       I didn't know about that, but I figured Kevin wasn't a slouch and was always looking for good people. And she was some of the best.
       "Well, any time you're looking for a job, you give Kevin a call, you hear?" Then it dawned on me. "When we come to school here next year, we're going to live out back. Will you make me a stuffed artichoke now and then?"
       "Kyle, baby, your breath is going to stink like a Portuguese whorehouse from the garlic," she said.
       We all laughed, but I got to thinking about that. I didn't want my breath to stink, that's for sure. Sheesh! Maybe I needed to buy some of those breath strip things. Or not eat so much stuffed artichoke.
       We had our drinks and the snacks Odille had made. I ate a whole stuffed artichoke, and then I got to thinking again about my breath. Tim got up to go to the bathroom, and I followed him.
       "Open up," I said.
       "Kyle, I have to go to the bathroom. Wait your turn," he said through the door.
       "Come on, Babe. This is important," I said.
       He opened the door and let me in.
       "What do you want?" he asked. He was a little bit pissed off at me. I could tell.
       "Does my breath stink?" I asked.
       "Blow in my face," he said.
       I did it.
       "No. It smells good," he said. "It smells like stuffed artichoke."
       "You swear on your honor it doesn't stink?" I asked.
       "Jesus, Kyle! No, it doesn't stink. On my honor. Get out. I have to piss," he said.
       "I want you to promise me you'll tell me if it starts stinking, you hear?" I said.
       "I promise. Now will you let me piss?" he asked.
       "I have to piss, too," I said. We stood side by side and took a leak. "Tim, don't let me down on this, okay, Babe?"
       "Kyle, what is your prob . . . ?" He didn't finish it. "Okay," he said. "I won't."
       We had one of those big ole fantastic New Orleans dinners. That Miss Odille could out-cook just about anybody I knew. I hoped she still worked for Grandma when we lived there. I was going to go to cooking camp with her, that's for sure.
       After dinner we got together in the den for a little while, but Cherie and Craig wanted to get the baby home. We got to hear him scream a little bit, though, before they left. He was wet and hungry, and his mama took care of feeding him. She made his daddy take care of the diaper, though. I went with Craig into the bedroom to change him.
       "He pooped, and then he pissed all over the place while Cherie was changing him this afternoon," I said.
       "I know. He does that all the time," Craig said. "He's beautiful, isn't he?"
       "I don't think he's beautiful. He looks just like you," I said.
       He laughed a little bit.
       "He looks just like Kevin, I think," Craig said.
       "Yeah, he does, but you and Kevin look alike to me," I said.
       "I know," he said.
       "We're going to go out tonight. You want to go with us?" I asked.
       "No. I want to go home with my wife and child," he said.
       "That sounds so good, Craig," I said.
       "Kyle, if you and Tim want a baby in a few years, I swear to God I won't stop until you get one to adopt," he said.
       "Can gay couples adopt in Louisiana?" I asked.
       "No, but single men can. It's very rare, but Cherie and I will make it happen," he said. "Count on it, Bubba."
       I did want one, messy as they were. I didn't really think Tim had thought about that kind of stuff yet, but I had. I knew he'd want one, when the time came.
       * * *
       Paddy grew up in the suburbs of a big city that had a big nightlife, but I was pretty sure he hadn't experienced any of it, especially the gay part. We took him to the Faubourg Marigny, which was a really big gay neighborhood. There were clubs, bars, bookstores, shops, coffeehouses, restaurants--all that stuff--and it was all gay. A lot of the houses were over a hundred years old, and a bunch of them had been fixed up. It was pretty nice.
       "This is unbelievable," Paddy said.
       "I'm sure there are sections of Boston like this," Kevin said. "You might want to check them out."
       "Maybe so, but I haven't been to anyplace like this," Paddy said. "I thought Bourbon Street was the big thing here."
       "It is, but it's not the only thing," Kevin said. "We'll go to Bourbon tomorrow night."
       "Cool," Paddy said.
       We had a great time that weekend. We did some sightseeing on Saturday because of Paddy, and we went to the French Quarter Saturday night for fun. We called up Seth and Curt, and they met us down there. Craig and Cherie went with us Saturday night, too, but Cherie kept an eye on her watch the whole time. That was the first time they had left Rob for them to go out, and he was with her parents. She wanted to be home for his next feeding, though, so they didn't stay out late with us. Everybody else did, though.
       "Are we going to church tomorrow at the cathedral?" Justin asked before we went out.
       "We can," Grandma said.
       "Oh, I think we should," Justin said. "Maybe we'll see BG."
       "BG?" Grandpa asked.
       "Bishop Greg," Justin said. He kind of lifted his eyebrows to Grandpa and smiled a little.
       Grandpa started laughing.
       "You stinker," Grandpa said to Jus. "You're not going to ever give me any rest about him, are you?"
       "Grandpa, I will support you in whatever decision you and Bishop Greg make," Justin said.
       Then it was Grandma's turn to double over laughing.
       "Justin, you are the only person on the face of this earth who has ever teased me about being gay," Grandpa said.
       "I'm not surprised. You don't come across as gay at all," Justin said. "It took a keen eye to spot you and ole Greg, that's for sure."
       Grandpa laughed, and we all laughed, too.
       "Jus, what is your problem with him? He is extremely smart and very competent. And he's a very nice guy," Kevin said.
       "Did you say he's a fairy nice guy?" Jus asked.
       Some of them laughed, but I knew Kevin was being serious. I knew Justin had a problem with that Greg guy because Greg was effeminate. I knew it every time it came up.
       "I don't have a problem with him, Kevin. Let's forget it, okay. I was teasing Grandpa and just joking," Justin said. He said that like he meant it.
       "Okay," Kevin said.
       "I'm not in the mood for a fucking lecture," Jus said to me in a whisper. Nobody but me heard him.

Chapter 11

(Jeff's Perspective)
       My brother, Josh, and I talked on the phone several times every week after we hooked up. I had hoped he and his partner, Patrick, would be able to come to Emerald Beach for the Fourth of July weekend, but they couldn't. In retrospect, that was probably for the best, since we had a house full that weekend. Chris and Dave were here, and Seth and Curt, and Alex and Cody, who were in town visiting Cody's family, were here, too. The Fourth was also Justin's birthday, and Cherie had her baby on the morning of the Fourth, as well. That was way too much, and I was glad Josh wasn't here. All of that would have taken too much from our time together.
       The Fourth of July was the first Saturday of the month, and the guys all went to New Orleans on the third Friday, the seventeenth. The next Thursday, July 23rd, was the day Josh and Patrick were coming to Emerald Beach.
       "You seem really nervous or excited tonight, or something," Tyler said.
       "I know. Please don't be upset with me. I'm really excited about seeing my brother," I said.
       "My brother, too," he said.
       I grinned at him. "Yeah," I said.
       Josh and Patrick drove up to our house in the late afternoon. The four of us shook hands, and I looked at my brother. He was very handsome, and he seemed bigger than I remembered. Of course, in all that time, he might have actually grown. He was a good six feet tall, with medium blond hair, blue eyes, and a pretty nice tan. He had on a tank top, and it was obvious he worked out.
       "It's been a long time," he said.
       "Eight years," I said. "But you and I have to get that behind us."
       "I know. I want to. We don't need our parents anymore, but we need each other, don't we?" he said.
       "Yeah, we do. But I have a new family now," I said.
       "Yeah, I know. You've told me about them, and I read your blog every day," Josh said.
       "You'll meet them," I said.
       "I can't wait," he said.
       We got their things in the guest room, and then we went out to the living room. I offered coffee, beer, water--whatever they wanted. They each wanted water and a beer. Ty and I joined them for a beer.
       "I can't believe I used to live in this heat without really noticing it," Josh said.
       "I know," Ty said. "Where are you from, Patrick?"
       "I'm from Charleston, South Carolina," Patrick said. "But I've lived in Indiana for the last five years, going to school."
       "I haven't been there," Ty said.
       "Where? Charleston or Indiana?" Patrick asked.
       "Charleston," Ty said. "I grew up in Minnesota, so I've driven through Indiana on my way home."
       Chuck came home from work at the usual time, and he changed out of his suit into shorts and a tee shirt. He got himself a beer, too. Then Tony came home. He worked outside a good bit, and he was pretty sweaty. He went ahead and took a shower and put on shorts, too, before he joined us.
       We visited a little bit and finished our beers. They were expecting us at Kevin and Rick's house for dinner and pool fun.
       The North Lagoon crowd were all excited about meeting Josh and Pat, of course, just as I knew they would be.
       "I don't think I've ever been in a room with this many gay men, all at one time," Pat said.
       "I'm the same way," Josh said.
       That night there were Kevin, Rick, Tim, Kyle, Justin, Brian, Denny, Paddy, and the six of us. An even dozen.
       "Do you not have any gay friends?" Kyle asked.
       "A few, but most of our friends are straight," Josh said.
       "We have a lot of straight friends, too, but most of our best friends are gay," Kyle said.
       Somebody, Kyle, probably, had put together a nice tray of hors d'ouerves, and they served drinks, too. Josh and Pat stuck with beer, and Ty, Chuck, Tony, and I drank beer, too. Kevin, Justin, Kyle, and Paddy had whiskey mixed with Sprite, though. The rest had plain soft drinks.
       "I hope everybody likes steaks," Kyle said. "'Cause that's what we're having."
       Josh and Pat said they did.
       "So, I understand you guys have jobs lined up in Jacksonville," Rick said.
       "Yeah. We start in two weeks. When we leave here, we're driving over there to look for an apartment. We're both pretty poor, but we're hoping we can find something nice that's affordable," Josh said.
       I didn't say anything, but I made a mental note to talk to Josh about lending them a few dollars, if they needed it.
       "Do you have big college loans?" Kevin asked.
       "Not too bad, for me," Josh said. "My grandparents helped me out a whole lot. And I had a scholarship, too. We both did, in fact. It's just that setting up a new place is expensive, with deposits and two months' rent, and all."
       "Just pay one month," Jus said.
       "No, they want two months' worth up front. First month and last month, so you can't skip out, I guess," Pat said.
       "Do you have furniture?" Kevin asked.
       "A few pieces, but not much. We drove down in my car, but Pat has a pick-up we can load up," Josh said. "We'll do okay."
       "And you're both architects, right?" Rick asked.
       "Yeah, although we sort of specialize in different things. I'm more into industrial design, and he's more into straight architecture. We'll be working for the same firm. A very gay-friendly firm, by the way. They know we're a couple," Pat said.
       "Well, that's good. No hiding at work, then," Kevin said.
       "That's the toughest part about being in the military," Tony said.
       "Unless you have to go to war," Tim said. "That's tougher."
       "Yeah, but that's what we do, Tim," Tony said. "From the looks of things in the Middle East, that possibility seems all too real."
       "Have you heard something?" I asked.
       "This guy Saddam Hussein over in Iraq is probably going to have to be taken care of," Tony said. "They're talking about sending in weapons inspectors to see if he's in compliance with UN resolutions to disarm, and everybody knows he isn't in compliance."
       "Would something like that involve you, Tony?" Kevin asked.
       "Probably not directly, but you can never tell," Tony said.
       "Why don't you get out? My dad did," Tim said. "And Ty did, too."
       "I'm weighing my options," Tony said, purposely vague, I thought.
       After the first round of drinks, we decided to go swimming. I knew Josh had read in my blog about us swimming, but I couldn't remember if I had mentioned the skinny dipping part.
       We often undressed right on the patio, but that night we decided to use the actual locker room. They were impressed with the clubhouse facilities.
       "We just might have to shoot some pool while we're here," Josh said. "Do you play, Jeff?"
       "I play at it, but I'm not any good. Some of these guys are very good, though," I said.
       Josh and Pat stripped down without hesitation, so I figured I must have mentioned swimming naked in my blog.
       "Look at these two," Justin said about Josh and me. "They're both wanting to get a good look at the other one, but they're afraid to."
       Kyle was close by, and he laughed.
       "Y'all are brothers. Looka hear, Josh. This is his dick. See?" I picked it up in the palm of his hand. "You got one, too, and it's just like his. Same size and everything," he said.
       "Jeff's won't be the same size long, if you keep fooling with it," Kyle said.
       Justin dropped my dick when Kyle said that.
       "Come on, y'all. Let's get in the water," Kyle said.
       "Josh, I'm sorry about that, man," I said. "He didn't mean any harm. He doesn't have a mean bone in his body."
       "Oh, I know that. And he was right. I did want to get a good look at you. Those two are major hotties, that's for sure. But they're not boyfriends, right?"
       "Right on both points," I said. "You know that Kyle is Clay's brother, don't you?"
       "Yeah. Was Clay as good looking as Kyle is?" Josh asked.
       "Yes," I said softly. "Let's hit the pool."
       * * *
       The visit was a great success, of course. I took the day off on Friday so I could spend time with Josh and Pat, and we had fun. We went to the beach for a while, but we also drove around so they could see Emerald Beach, both east and west of the bridge. Friday night the two of them, and Ty and I, went out clubbing, and we had a good time. On Saturday night we went to church and then back to North Lagoon Drive to eat.
       "My God, I hadn't been to Mass in years before tonight," Pat said.
       "Neither had I," Josh said. "In fact, I really don't consider myself a Catholic anymore."
       "I didn't go to Mass, either, until I started hanging out with this crowd," I said. "The priest tonight is a good friend of ours. One of our gay friends."
       "Really?" Pat said. "Did he come out to you guys?"
       "Yeah, he did. He's not active now, but he's all gay," I said. "I think that helps. We know he's not judging us or anything."
       "Yeah, I guess that could make a difference," Josh said.
       We swam for a while, and then we shot pool. Josh was much better at pool than I was, and Pat was even better than he was. Kyle organized a ping-pong tournament, and they both played that well, too. We had a good time Saturday night.
       They wanted to get up and off fairly early Sunday morning so they could get to Jacksonville with time to look around. They had both been there for interviews, of course, but they wanted to buy a paper and scout out some apartments that afternoon. I was the only one who got up with them.
       "Do you want me to cook some breakfast?" I asked.
       "No, coffee's fine for me," Josh said. "Pat, too. Right, Babe?"
       "Right. We might grab some drive-thru mid-morning, but I get nauseated if I eat when I first wake up," Pat said.
       "Have you guys had time to think about and talk about what we discussed Friday?" I asked.
       "You mean a loan?" Josh asked.
       "Yeah," I said.
       "Yes, we have. Jeff, that's an incredible offer, man. Are you sure you want to do that?" Josh said.
       "Josh, it's a loan. It's not a gift. You do pay your debts, don't you?" I asked.
       "Oh, yeah. We pay our debts. What we're thinking is, let us figure out how much we're going to need. We have a few bucks, and we'll use those first. Then we'll borrow the rest from you. How does that sound?" Josh said.
       "Now look. Don't use everything you've got. Aren't you going to need new clothes for work? I know I would. I can lend you up to three thousand dollars. Take it all, if you need it," I said.
       I had a good bit more money than that in savings, but I didn't think they'd need more. Plus, I hadn't seen Josh in eight years, and I really didn't know him. I felt guilty for having that attitude about my own brother, but I couldn't help being leery of just giving him a blank check.
       "We'll let you know, and thanks, brother," Josh said.
       Josh and I both cried a little when we hugged and said goodbye in our driveway. It felt so good to have him back in my life, to have any of my family back. The business of losing Clay had pretty much eclipsed my emotional needs with respect to my past and my family, but now I was beginning to confront, and to deal with, the family thing.
       Ty was up when I went back inside.
       "Let's go back to bed," he said. "I need you bad this morning."
       We made love like champions, and I felt a completeness to my life that I had never known before.

(Josh's Perspective)
       My little brother had grown up, and he had grown up into quite a fine man, too. He was very good looking, as I knew from the pictures of him I had seen, but he was built a lot better than I remembered or could tell from the pictures.
       The thing that impressed me most about him, though, was his gentleness and kindness. He was rather on the quiet side, and that much I remembered from before, but his being quiet wasn't born out of shyness or low self-esteem. I could tell he was totally smitten by Tyler, and it was obvious he loved Kevin and Rick, and their boys, very much, too. It was also very obvious that they all loved him, as well, and me, too, because of him.
       Now, that was a household. As best I could figure it, there were eight of them living there, although I knew from reading Jeff's journal that Tim and Kyle also had parents and regular homes elsewhere.
       I knew they had two dogs, and I was a little apprehensive about them. I had been bitten by a dog when I was little, and I didn't like dogs. They didn't like me, either. I guess they sensed I wasn't a friend, but, for whatever reason, dogs, especially big dogs, scared me. Their two turned my attitude around, though. Those dogs were like kids in that family. They were rambunctious when they wanted them to be, and they were serious and well behaved when that was appropriate. I had never gone swimming with a dog before, and I was amazed to see those dogs playing with the rest of us in the pool.
       As much fun as the dogs were, it was the guys themselves that fascinated me. Justin was unbelievable. Everything he said was totally deadpan, and almost everything he said was hilarious. He seemed to have no inhibitions whatsoever, both in what he said and in what he did. He was very good looking, and he had the physique of a bodybuilder who hadn't quite committed to that sport yet.
       The other one was Kyle. It was very obvious he was in charge of everyone but Kevin and Rick, and the boys, including Jeff, deferred to him. His whole approach was "aw, shucks," unless he had to get them cracking to get a job done. Then his approach was very direct. Jeff said Kyle's brother, Clay, was as good looking as Kyle was, and that boy was gorgeous. I was sort of partial to the dark haired, olive-skinned type, anyway, and Kyle was everything I liked. And he had hair on his chest. It didn't cover everything, but it was enough to be totally sexy, to me. He, like some of the others, had a real tattoo just above his pubic hair, and they all had fakes on their left biceps. The fakes were starting to flake off on some of them, and they really needed to wash those things off.
       I had a wonderful time with those guys that weekend. Pat and I were moving to Jacksonville, which wasn't all that far from Emerald Beach, and I was looking forward to spending a lot of time there.

(Brian's Perspective)
       Tim and I both placed first in our divisions of the state science fair in Florida, and that gave us the right to go to the International Science Fair. I think it was pretty much a national one, but they called it "international" because Canadians were in it, too. That summer it was in Houston, Texas, and Tim and I were going. In fact, Kevin, Rick, Justin, and Kyle were going, too. My two dads would never not go with me for something like that, and I knew that Justin and Kyle would always be at our sides, too. Tim's parents were going, too.
       We considered the idea of driving out for the fair.
       "It's damn far, you know?" Kyle said. "That's about a thirteen- or fourteen-hour drive."
       "Are you thinking we should fly?" Tim asked.
       "That's what I'm thinking," Kyle said. "I can just see myself getting squirrelly as hell in a car for that long. I'll be miserable, and I'll make everybody else miserable, too."
       "He's right about that. And when he gets squirrelly, he starts going after nuts," Justin said. "I want mine left alone."
       We laughed. He said stuff like that so serious all the time, but he usually intended it to be funny. And usually it was.
       "So, do you all want to fly?" Kevin asked. "Because if we fly, we need to see about getting some tickets."
       "I sure do," Kyle said. "How are we doing on the FF?"
       "The FF? What the hell is that?" Justin asked.
       "Frequent Flyer miles," Kyle said. "I got a ton of 'em. In fact, I can probably get several tickets. Maybe enough for everybody."
       "How do you have so many?" Kevin asked. "Oh, never mind. I know."
       "How?" Tim asked.
       "He gets them from all the Goodson American Express cards," Rick said. "The rich get richer."
       "Hey, cut that out, Richard," Kyle said.
       "Richard?"
       "Yeah, that's your name, ain't it?" Kyle said. "Although, I think Dick fits you better."
       Rick got all serious when he called him Dick.
       "Kyle, I don't think he likes that," Justin said.
       "I know," Kyle said, grinning his devil grin.
       "Kyle, now that can hurt somebody's feelings, Son," Kevin said. "I know you don't want to do that."
       "You're right. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings. I know what it's like to get my feelings hurt by somebody I love, and I damn sure don't want to do that," Kyle said.
       We all got extremely quiet all of a sudden, and Kevin sort of cringed. The atmosphere was charged.
       "Kyle, can I talk to you for a second?" Kevin asked.
       This was evidently turning into something serious, and I was in the dark. I looked at Tim, and he shrugged to indicate he didn't know what was going on, either.
       "No. That's not necessary, Kevin. Let's get on with the plans. We really need to clear flying with Doc and Sonya, too, don't you think?" Kyle said.
       "Yeah, we do," Rick said.
       "There's an address we can ship our projects to," Tim said. "We'll need to see about doing that, too."
       We took care of the tickets and the shipping the next day. That night, though, the four of us were in the clubhouse. Paddy had a date with his new boyfriend, and I didn't know where Denny was. Maybe at Chip's house.
       "Kyle, you ain't had you a private talk with Kevin in a long time, but you almost got you one tonight, son," Justin said.
       "I know. What was that all about?" Tim asked.
       "I don't want to talk about it, guys. Okay? I probably shouldn't have said what I did," Kyle said.
       "Did Kevin hurt your feelings?" Tim asked.
       "Babe, Kevin and I have had a couple of misunderstandings, and that's all they were. I know Kevin loves me and would never hurt my feelings on purpose. I'm believe that as much as I believe anything. But sometimes he doesn't really think things through before he reacts, you know? But like I said, I really don't want to talk about it," he said.
       I was dying to know what that was all about.
       "Kyle, how can you not tell us, man?" Justin said.
       "Look, guys, they were misunderstandings, but most of all, they were between him and me. I don't want you guys thinking any less of Kevin or any less of me. He and I are cool with what happened, and that's it," he said.
       "So, there's going to be secrets, huh?" Justin said.
       "No, there's not going to be any secrets, but there's going to be confidentiality. Can you live with that?" Kyle said.
       "I reckon I'm going to have to," Jus said.
       "That's right. Now let's talk about the trip to Houston," he said.
       "Have you figured out a good trip for us?" Jus asked.
       "Tell you the truth, there ain't all that much to do there. At least, not compared to other cities we've been to," Kyle said.
       "For real? That's a damn big city," Justin said.
       "I know it's a big city, but if I'm looking at the right Web sites, it's limited," Kyle said.
       "But you're going to organize us, right?" Justin said.
       "Oh, yeah. Now, the space thing is big. That's probably a whole day, right there. Besides that, the only other things I could find that I thought would interest all of us was a Six Flags, an old ranch, and a battlefield. That's about it," he said.
       "That Six Flags is an amusement park, ain't it?" Justin said. "I've heard of those. They got 'em all over the place."
       "Yeah. I mean, how many of those have we been to? There are just so many times you can get your guts flip-flopped and it still be fun, you know?" Kyle said. "Same thing with water parks."
       Kyle and Justin were no more trying to be funny than Trixie was, but Tim and I thought they were hilarious. They had picked up a lot of each other's mannerisms and expressions, and they were just funny to us.
       "They got some old houses downtown around Sam Houston park, but I don't know about that. That sounds a lot like those places we went to in New Orleans on that first trip. Y'all remember that?" Kyle said.
       "Yeah, I do. You seen one, you seen 'em all, I think," Jus said.
       "Jus, you have to look at those places like that from an interior decorator's point of view," Tim said.
       Tim was baiting him.
       "See, Tim, I can't do that. I don't know how, man," Jus said. "You like looking at those old houses?"
       Tim chuckled.
       "Not really, Bubba," he said.
       "I didn't think so," he said.
       "Well, we're not going to have that much time out there," Kyle said. "But you know we're going to have fun."
       "Yeah," we all said.
       * * *
       We left on a Thursday morning. We were in Atlanta by nine o'clock our time and in Houston by one. The first thing we did was get something to eat after we checked into our hotel. It turned out Kyle's parents wanted to go, too, so they were along with us. That meant there were ten of us in our party. We ended up renting two vehicles.
       Tim and I wanted to go to Rice University, where the science fair was being held, to make sure our stuff had gotten there in one piece. We also had to set up our exhibits. The judging was the next day, and we both had to be there pretty early for it. That was okay, though, because it meant we would have most of Friday and all day Saturday to see the sights. We had most of Thursday afternoon to sight see, too.
       We got our exhibits set up pretty quickly, and we looked around a little at our competition.
       "There's no way we have a prayer," Tim said to me.
       "I know. My God! Did you see some of those things? But at least we got to be in it. That counts for something, don't you think?"
       "Yeah, I think it counts for a lot," Tim said. "But you know what, Bri? We've got a long way to go, man."
       "I think we ought to skip the interviews tomorrow and just have fun," I said.
       "I was thinking the same thing. Neither one of us has a ghost of a chance. We might as well have a good time," Tim said.
       "Tim and I don't have to do interviews," I announced to the rest of the crowd when we all got back together.
       "Why not?" Doc asked.
       "We just don't," I said.
       "So we got the whole day tomorrow? Is that what you're saying?" Kyle asked.
       "I should have spent more time with you guys on this thing," Doc said.
       "Dad, you spent a lot of time with us. He's a sophomore and I'm a junior. We're out of our league here," Tim said.
       "Next year we'll do projects on orthodontia, and we'll win," Sonya said.
       That made everybody laugh, more because of the way she said it than because of what she said.
       "I'll be damned," Doc said, and that made us laugh, too.
       "Well, I think these boys have done fabulous jobs, and I'm just so proud of them I can hardly stand it," Gene said. "These two boys are numero uno in the state of Florida, and that's all that matters to me. Plus, they're so far over my head, I can't even read the labels on their jeans."
       That got a good laugh.
       "Now, if they had dog training in this contest--something that people really care about--I know who the winner would be," Gene said.
       "No question, Daddy," Kyle said.
       "That's right, Son," Gene said. "Come on, y'all. Let's go play."
       And that's exactly what we did.
       Space Center Houston was really awesome, but I figured it would be. There were spacecraft all over the place, an exhibit on astronaut training, a simulated space walk, and an exhibit on robotics.
       "Didn't we do the space walk thing somewhere else?" Gene asked.
       "Yeah, in New Orleans," Kevin said.
       "I thought so. It was fun here, but it wasn't exactly unique, was it?" Gene said.
       The space center also had a model of the International Space Station. Since the Columbia blew up, the space station had been in the news a lot, and it was very interesting poking around to see what that thing looked like.
       There were some rides, too, like the Martian Matrix, which was a bunch of mazes and tunnels in this big five-story building. That was fun. They had the Blast Off ride, too, that was supposed to be a journey to infinity and beyond. That was great.
       "I don't get the whole point of this space stuff," Justin said.
       "Neither me, Jus," Gene said.
       "Daddy, it's research. They're finding new stuff up there," Kyle said.
       "I know that much, but what they going to do with it?" Gene asked.
       Kyle and Justin, and to some extent Rick, too, had this grumble talk they used. Mr. Gene was a master of it, and he and Kyle and Justin were going full blast with that then.
       "I don't know," Kyle said. "But I think it's for science."
       "Well science is good, but when are they going to figure out how to keep the June Grass from coming in, huh? That's what I want to know," Gene said. "Our customers hate that shit, and I do, too."
       "Daddy, I think that's a difference branch of science, but me and Tim are going to get right on it," Kyle said.
       "Y'all come here to me right now," Gene said.
       "What?" Kyle asked.
       He grabbed Kyle and Tim into a big hug and rubbed their heads together.
       "These two heads better come up with something. Besides saving lives, I mean, Tim. Save all the lives you want to, Tim, but save that beach from that June Grass," he said.
       "Gene, I don't think I can," Tim said.
       "Come here, Son. I guess if you can't save the world from June Grass in the Gulf, you'll just have to save lives instead," he said. "A bitter compromise, if ever I heard one."
       The adults all laughed hard when he said that. I wasn't really sure what he was talking about, and I didn't think the other kids were, either.
       We went to the George Ranch Historical Park, and that was fun. It was about one hundred years of Texas history, and they had actors in costume like we had seen at other historical places. Those guys were at the 1830's historical stock farm. There was a Victorian mansion on the place, too, dating from the 1890's.
       "I absolutely love Victorian homes," Rita said. "Don't you all?"
       "Yes, ma'am, we all love 'em," Kyle said.
       "Kyle, you no more mean that than the man in the moon," she said.
       "Rita, he don't even know what they are, and neither do I," Justin said.
       "I know. I tried to raise my children all their lives to appreciate things like that, Justin, but I think it's the XY chromosome, or whatever it is that makes them male, that interferes. Clay was absolutely the same way. All Clay and Kyle ever cared about was sports and physical things. Water skiing and surfing and fishing and hunting. They never appreciated beauty," she said.
       "Now, Pet, that's not quite true," Gene said.
       "What do you mean?" she said.
       "Well, we have a son who's fixing to publish an art book. At age eighteen. I'm not sure what you said really applies to him," he said.
       "My God. You're right," she said. "Kyle, I take back everything I just said about you and Clay."
       "Why take it back? That really was all we wanted to do," Kyle said. "That's all we did, in fact."
       "I know," she said.
       We did some more stuff in Houston. We went to the San Jacinto Battleground Historical Complex, and that's where the Texans fought the Mexicans and won. They had a monument that was like the Washington Monument, and the one at the Chalmette Battlefield in New Orleans, and they had a museum about the battle, too. They also had the Battleship Texas, but it was a whole lot smaller and older than the Battleship Alabama we had seen in Mobile.
       One night we all went to a gay country and western bar, and that was fun. We did the two-step and the shuffle, and that was great.
       "Come on and dance with me," I had to say to Justin.
       "Little Buddy, you know I'm not a dancer," he said.
       "No? You dance at home all the time. Get up and dance with me," I said. "This is your kind of music."
       He did, and we had a great time.
       The parents had no problem that we were in a gay club, and they danced with each other, with us, and with random guys who asked them to dance.
       "That's the first time I've ever danced with a man," Doc said, after he had danced with a stranger.
       "Did you have fun dancing with him?" Kevin asked.
       "Yes," Doc said.
       "So?" Kevin said.
       "So, let's dance," Doc said, and he and Kevin spun off.
       We had to keep our shirts on in that place, and it was very, very hot. It would have been hot with shirts off, but it was even hotter with shirts on. Most of the guys in there had on long-sleeve shirts, too.
       There was a patio at that place where guys could smoke. It was only 86 degrees out there, instead of 106 degrees inside. Justin wanted to smoke, and I went out there with him.
       "Damn, it's so much cooler out here," he said.
       "I know. We need to tell the others," I said.
       "Yeah," he said. "Brian, you know what? This city is big, but it doesn't have any character. Where have we been? New Orleans, Boston, New York, Washington. Those places have character. Houston doesn't."
       "I know. Kevin says Atlanta doesn't, either. I think Kevin's prejudiced when it comes to cities in the South," I said.
       "He likes Savannah and Charleston, though," I said.
       "Yeah, I know. We need to put those on our list of places to visit," he said. "Did you ever think you would travel this much?"
       "No way. We're lucky, aren't we?" I said.
       "Very," he said.
       We went to the banquet that ended the science fair Saturday night, and it seemed like about half the people who got awards were Asian or Middle Eastern. That didn't bother us, of course, but it proved the point that Tim and I weren't in their league. It seemed, too, that every one of the winners was a senior. They said the name of their high school, but they also said where they were going to college. It was all places like MIT, Cal Tech, Stanford, Harvard. Those kinds of schools. This one boy was from right there in Houston, and he was going to Rice University.
       "Did y'all know they changed the name of that school?" Gene asked.
       "What did it used to be?" Justin asked.
       "Sam Houston Institute of Technology," Gene said.
       Doc thought what his friend had said was hilarious, but I didn't get it. In fact, none of the kids got it.
       "I don't get it, Daddy," Kyle said.
       "Think of the initials, Son," Gene said.
       That's when we all laughed.
       "For real?" Kyle asked.
       "No. That joke's as old as I am, Son," Gene said. "They ain't even that stupid in Texas."
       "Why is everybody down on Texas?" Sonya asked.
       "I'm not down on Texas," Kevin said.
       "Babe, I don't want to make you mad, but you're about the worst one," Rick said.
       "I'm down on Houston, not the whole state," Kevin said. "I love San Antonio, for instance."
       "What did Houston ever do to you?" Justin asked.
       "Nothing, but they're just jealous of New Orleans, I think. For example, do you know that the nickname for Houston is the Bayou City? I mean it is. Really. Everybody in the world knows Louisiana is the Bayou State. You see what I mean?" Kevin said.
       "I did see a reference to that somewhere," Doc said. "That does seem rather strange, doesn't it?"
       "Maybe they got bayous here," Justin said. "I mean, we got 'em at home, don't we? Ain't that thing behind our house a bayou?"
       "No, it's a lagoon," Kyle said. "That's why they call it Grand Lagoon, dummy."
       "Actually, Son, your brother's right. Our lagoon really is a bayou. And we've got eight or ten other bayous around, too," Gene said.
       "I think of a lagoon as being manmade," Doc said, "but I know Grand Lagoon isn't manmade."
       "What genius named it a lagoon, then?" Kyle asked.
       "Your great-granddaddy and Philip's granddaddy, that's who," Gene said.
       "For real?" Kyle asked. "Philip Andrew's granddaddy and my granddaddy?"
       "Your great-granddaddy. All in the world it was, was a marketing scheme. They thought 'lagoon' sounded prettier and ritzier than 'bayou,'" Gene said. "They were so desperate to develop that property along there, they would have called it the Emerald Sea, if they thought they could get away with it."
       "That's pretty fascinating," Doc said.
       "George, my granddaddy was a character, now. I'm telling you," Gene said. "He had a friend who had a rain gage. The man checked it faithfully every day. My granddaddy and some of his cronies would fill it up from time to time when we hadn't had any rain. Sometimes when it had rained, they'd go around to his house and empty it."
       "Did the guy ever catch on?" Kyle asked.
       "Nope. Not that I know of," Gene said.
       "See, we ain't the only bad kids in my family," Kyle said.
       "He wasn't a kid, Son. He was a grown man when he did that," Gene said. "People thought he was crazy when he bought all this beach property around here. My grandmother almost divorced him over it, in fact. Now who's laughing, though."
       "Incredible foresight," Sonya said.
       "It wasn't foresight, Sonya. He just wanted land, and beach land was dirt cheap 'cause you couldn't farm it," Gene said. "He didn't make any money off it for years. It was only after he got hooked up with Old Man Andrews that they started developing it."
       "The two families go way back, don't they?" Doc said.
       "Oh, yeah," Gene said. "Way back. When Kyle and Philip became friends, his daddy and I were beside ourselves, we were so happy. Clay was pretty good friends with one of the other Andrews boys, too. They weren't as close as Kyle and Philip, though."
       "Well, it's all very remarkable," Doc said. That ended the evening.
       We flew home the next morning, ready for the rest of the summer.

Chapter 12

(Chuck's Perspective)
       I had been gay all my life, but that was the summer I learned what being gay was all about. And what it was all about for me was Tony Miller.
       He and I had started dating in the early spring, and by the start of the summer we were ready to ratchet up the relationship a notch and move in together. Our friends Jeff Martin and Tyler Jones had a great three-bedroom townhouse on a bay that they were paying $200.00 a month to live in. It belonged to Kyle's parents, and they were getting it that cheap because the Goodsons were rich and because Jeff had been their son's partner before their son died. Essentially, Jeff and Ty were just paying the taxes and insurance on the place, and that was all. My share was going to be $50 a month, and I couldn't live in a cardboard box for that little money. Tony and I jumped at their offer to move in with them.
       We were two extremely compatible couples. We were both pretty tame. I mean, we went out occasionally to clubs and such, but our idea of a fun Saturday night was to order pizza, rent a couple of movies, and snuggle with our partners on the two couches in the living room as we watched the movies.
       Now and then the Big Four boys would come over to visit, and they were always fun. Plus, it seemed as though there was always some kind of party going on at Kevin and Rick's house. Naturally, the four of us in the townhouse were always included. For the first time in my life, I felt that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I had a partner, Tony, that I loved completely; two extremely close friends, Jeff and Ty, who were our family; an extended family that loved us and were always glad to see us; and a great job that had the potential for developing into a life-long career.
       "Are you happy?" I asked Tony one Saturday afternoon. We were alone in the townhouse.
       "Am I happy? I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life," he said. "How could I not be happy?"
       "I feel exactly the same way," I said. "I was just checking."
       "The only thing I'm not all that happy about is my job," he said.
       That took me aback a little.
       "I thought you loved your job," I said.
       "I love the work, but I hate the circumstances of it," he said.
       &