Aaron and
Andreas
By Sequoyah
Pendor
sequoyah@charter.net
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Chapter 1
I was making my last
round, checking everything after the park had closed at 11:30. I was running
late as it was well past midnight when I headed to my last checkpoint. Nearing
the duck pond -- cussing because there was no way you could get close without
stepping in duck shit -- I saw a figure sitting on a park bench at the edge of
the pond. No-one was supposed to be in the park after closing, but homeless men
often tried to stay in the park overnight as there were many places where they
could, at least partially, get out of the weather. In spite of the fact it was
late March, the evening was chilly and the slight breeze made it feel colder
than it was. I felt chilled even though I had dressed warmly. The figure on the
bench was in shirt-sleeves and had to be cold. "Another homeless person," I
thought as I walked toward the bench, trying to avoid as much duck shit as
possible.
The bench sat in a pool of light from the street lamp over it.
When I reached the bench, I could tell the person sitting there was a young man
-- late teens I suspected -- from the way he was dressed in the latest teen
fashion. He was dressed too well to be homeless -- I mean aside from the fact
that he needed a jacket on. "Young fellow, the park is closed. You need to run
along home," I said as I touched him on the shoulder. When he didn't respond, I
started to shake him, thinking he was asleep. When I did, he fell over. "Just
what I need," I thought to myself, "a dead teenager. By the time I get this
taken care of and all the paperwork done, it will be long past the time I should
be home."
As I walked around to the front of the bench where the young
man was now lying, I took down my shoulder mike and, just before calling for the
meat wagon to pick up the body, pressed a finger against the young man's neck
and felt a weak pulse. I identified myself and said, "Get an ambulance here on
the double. There is a kid here who is barely alive... down by the duck pond," I
responded when I was asked where I was in the park. I didn't want to move the
young man any more than necessary, so I covered him with my jacket. "Damn! It is
too cold for this time of year," I muttered as the breeze found its way through
my shirt.
It was only a few minutes before the Grady Ambulance came
rushing toward the duck pond, cutting across the grass to reduce the distance
between us. When it came to a screeching halt beside the bench, the two members
of the EMS practically fell out of the vehicle with bags in hand and quickly
started working on the young man.
After they had him all stabilized, one
of them said, "We'll talk with you later to complete the paperwork. Right now we
are in a race to save this kid's life." With those words, he hopped in the back
of the ambulance and it sped away, siren blaring.
"So much for hitting
the bed early," I thought. I had planned to get to bed early enough to get up at
7:00 and do my Saturday errands Friday morning -- this morning as it now was --
so I'd have Saturday and Sunday free to go hiking with Jerry Coghill, a good
friend from my police academy days. I was a city boy, having grown up and lived
all my life in Atlanta, but Jerry was, in his words, a north Georgia hillbilly,
who loved to hike in the north Georgia mountains. He had been married, but his
wife and five-year-old son were killed in an automobile accident the year before
he started at the academy. They had been hit head-on by a drunk driver. The
drunk was going the wrong way on I-285 at speeds in excess of one hundred miles
an hour trying to elude the police. All three were killed instantly. Jerry had
chosen to go into police work hoping to get some of the drunks off the road. We
got paired up for an exercise during the last weeks of academy and I learned
about his family and told him about mine. I had lost a girlfriend, my sister and
mother, all the family I had, to crack. I was out to put all the drug dealers in
jail.
Although we were in the Academy at the same time, I was a year and
a half younger than Jerry, just barely old enough to join the police
force.
I suspect it was wise of those who made the assignments to put me
in the park, where I might pick up a small-time drug dealer occasionally, but
not on the Red Dog Squad -- a sharp drug-busting team. Jerry, likewise, got put
on foot patrol where the only way he'd nail a drunk driver would be if he could
outrun him! The first weekend we had off after we met, Jerry invited me to go to
Blue Ridge to meet his family.
I tried to get out of going without
telling Jerry why. See, no African-American goes to north Georgia and especially
off the main highways. We have a thing about putting ourselves in situations
where we are not wanted. Finally I realized there was no easy way out and told
Jerry of my fears. "Not to worry," he had said, "you'll be under constant police
protection," and laughed.
Jerry was one of six brothers, being number
four. There were two younger and three older, but from oldest to youngest there
was only eight years difference in age. Edward, the youngest, had graduated high
school the year before and was attending a small college in the next county.
Joseph, the second youngest, was a sophomore in the same college. Jerry was
twenty-three. John, the twenty-five-year-old, planned to set up practice as a
family doctor in a clinic a few miles from the home place when he finished all
the requirements. Junior and Wilson, the oldest -- and twins -- had married
shortly after high school and had taken on the family business -- apple orchards
and a plant nursery -- after a couple years in college.
There were only a
couple hundred acres of the place left. A year or so before he died, when Jerry
was twenty, Mr. Coghill was offered a great deal of money by a developer for a
tract of land. Mr. Coghill was no dunce when it came to business, and decided if
his land, undeveloped, was worth what he had been offered, he'd develop it
himself. He hit a good time when yuppies in Atlanta were earning money
hand-over-fist and looking to "get away from it all" so long as they could take
it all with them. They were building vacation places in north Georgia like mad.
Since he owned the land and could finance the vacation places being built on it,
he made a pile of money. But you'd never suspect Mrs. Coghill and her six sons
were all millionaires. They still lived as they had always done -- as good,
solid mountain people. They lived well, but no-one would have accused them of
being extravagant.
Anyway, we went at the weekend and had a grand time. I
almost lost it at Sunday dinner when one of the boys -- Edward -- asked me
something, I don't remember what, and said he was really interested in the
Negro's point of view -- except Negro came out pretty close to the "N" word
whereupon Mrs. Coghill, who was sitting beside him, hit him upside the head with
the spoon she was using to fill small bowls with blackberry cobbler. His face
dripping blackberry juice, he said, "Ma, you know I didn't mean
nothin'".
"If you don't mean nothing then don't say nothing, and if you
intend to sit with your feet under my table, you will keep a civil tongue in
your head. Nobody, but nobody, insults a guest in my house. Now go to your
room!"
"I'm sorry, Mr. Johnson, I know better and I didn't mean for the
word to sound the way it did." From the look on his face, it was clear Edward
hadn't meant anything. Nonetheless, he said, "Excuse me," and headed for his
room. Mrs. Coghill told him he could come out when we finished our dinner
coffee. It was very clear that tiny mountain woman had long ago put the fear of
God in her male brood.
"Don't worry about it, Edward," I said as he left
the table.
"He better worry about it," Mrs. Coghill said. Her body
language and tone of voice made it very clear she was not kidding. She had been
far more insulted than I had.
I smiled as I recalled that and a hundred
other things that had happened in my almost-monthly visits to north Georgia. In
the last few months, when I didn't have a weekend, I'd go up during the week by
myself. But this weekend we were both off and had planned to go together to
hike, which we hadn't done since last fall, and now it was all messed
up.
When I reached Grady, I filled out all their paperwork, as well as my
own, as best I could before I learned anything about the young man's condition.
It was early morning, almost time I should be getting up rather than not having
been in bed, when the doctor came by to talk with me.
"Officer, you can
chalk up saving a life for your work last night. The young man has been severely
beaten. I suspect he was kicked numerous times while he was on the ground, so
there is internal damage. He was bleeding internally and had lost a lot of blood
when you found him. We got the bleeding stopped and closed the cuts on his body
and a bad one on his face. He really is lucky. In another half-hour, hour, he
would have been beyond help. He had a student ID card in his pocket, so we know
his name is Andreas Jackson and he is a student at Lakeshore in College Park,
but that's it. Thought you'd need to know."
I thanked the doctor, went to
the station house and turned in my report, and went home to bed after I called
Jerry to tell him I'd not be going hiking. I was asleep by the time my head hit
the pillow.
I slept until mid-afternoon and when I got up, I showered,
shaved and got dressed. I looked over the Saturday paper and saw nothing of
interest. There was no mention of the kid from the park, which was not
surprising. After I had made an arrest of a drug dealer the police had been
trying to nab for months, I looked all over the paper for an article about it.
When I didn't find it, Jerry had said, "Person'd think you were from the
mountains. In Blue Ridge, catching someone with a couple leaves of weed would be
news. In Atlanta it'd take a couple tons to make an impression."
I was at
loose ends since my plans had all been shattered. I called Jerry on the
off-chance he had decided not to go home, but I guess he had, so I talked to his
machine. After a while, I decided to go downtown, grab lunch and then find
something to do. After lunch, I went by the station house -- I don't know why --
and learned that the kid had regained consciousness but no-one had talked to
him. "Since you found him, why don't you go talk to him, Johnson? You have
nothing better to do, do you?"
Really I didn't, and I was interested in
what had happened to the kid. "Sounds like a passable idea to me," I said.
"Besides, I'll probably need the comp time one of these days." Even the first
weekend I had off in ages was going to end up with me doing police
work.
"Yeah, like the next time you have a hot date."
"Yeah,
something like that." There was always some reference around the station to my
having little or no social life. I had even overheard two guys talking,
wondering if I was gay. I pretended I didn't hear them for a lot of reasons, one
of which was that was a question I had asked myself. I had dated in high school
and even had a steady girlfriend until she did herself in with crack, but after
that? Now? The questioning of my sexuality was the one thing I had never shared
with Jerry. At one point I thought I might be falling in love with him, but he
started dating again and I realized what I had known all along: Jerry was
straight as an arrow. I was happy for him and that ended any romantic ideas I
had. I was sure it was just that I did love the guy like the brother I never
had. Since we spent a lot of time together and I was horny, I thought I had
developed some sexual feeling for him, and probably had, but that ended when
Susan came into his life.
I went to Grady and asked at the desk about
Andreas Jackson, and was told he had been upgraded from critical to serious
condition. He was in room 653. "Are you a member of the family?" the desk clerk
asked.
"No, I am the officer who found him," I said as I showed her my
badge. "I need to talk with him if that is possible."
"You'll have to
talk with the nurse on the floor," she told me.
"Thanks," I said, and
walked over to the elevators and punched the button for the sixth floor. When I
reached the nurses' station, I saw LaTonya Helms, who was in nurses' training,
looking at charts. "LaTonya," I said, "I haven't seen you in ages. How's it
going?"
"Fine. See you are the one who found Andreas Jackson," she
smiled. "Proud to know one of our College Park boys is on the job." LaTonya and
I had been in high school together -- not Lakeshore, but College Park High. As a
matter of fact, we had been very close friends. She stood by me and gave me a
shoulder to cry on when one by one the people in my life chose crack over me.
She dated a guy a year ahead of us who had gone in the military as soon as he
finished high school. After that she and I used to talk a lot and we did things
together, but just as friends. DeWayne, her soldier boy, was not available for
the senior prom so she asked me if I'd be her escort. I went all out to give her
a prom night to remember and she had said it was the next best thing to having
DeWayne.
"How's Andreas doing, LaTonya?" I asked.
"Lot better than
expected. I understand the doctor said in another half-hour he would have been
beyond help. He's conscious, but probably sleeping. He's under pretty heavy
sedation because of the pain. Have any idea who might have done this to
him?"
"None. That's what I'm hoping to find out."
"He's in room
653. If he's asleep, you can wake him if you feel it is
necessary."
"Fine. How about coffee after I see him? Haven't talked to
you in ages."
"I have a break in half an hour. Come by
then."
"Sure thing."
When I got to room 653 I found Andreas
asleep. He was hooked up to all sorts of things. His face was still badly
swollen and he had butterfly bandages holding several cuts together, a really
bad-looking one on his left cheek covered by that clear "artificial skin". But,
in spite of that, I could see he was a handsome young man. Even with his blood
loss, he still had an amazing complexion. It was smooth as could be where he had
not been beat on, and was the color of milk chocolate, a warm, soft, smooth
brown, not "bright", but rich brown, beautiful -- skin a woman would die
for.
I thought if I could awaken him easily I would, otherwise I'd let
him sleep. "Andreas," I said softly. His eyes fluttered open, eyes which were
dark, dark brown with flecks of gold -- wide, beautiful eyes surrounded with the
longest lashes I think I had ever seen. When I saw he was awake, I said, "I'm
Officer Johnson. Want to tell me about this?"
He turned his head away
from me and I could see his chest heaving as he tried to hold back the tears.
"Andreas, I'm here to help, but I need to know who did this to you."
He
turned back to me, tears running down his face, trying to choke back sobs. I
took a tissue from the box on his bedside table and blotted away his tears,
since I was sure wiping them away would be painful.
"Can I tell you
something and you keep it between us?" he asked. "I need to talk to somebody,
but I don't want what I have to say spread around."
"Ok, when you finish,
I'll let you tell me what you want kept secret and unless it is something that
could cause hurt to you or someone else, or causes me to violate my oath as a
police officer, it'll stay between us. Is that ok?" Andreas nodded. "I know you
are a student at Lakeshore in College Park so I assume you live there. Is that
correct?" Andreas nodded again. "Well, that's it. That's all I know. I think
someone is trying to get your address from the school authorities, but that's
taking time. Can you tell me where you live? Who should be contacted? That sort
of thing?"
"You're right, I am a senior at Lakeshore. I lived in College
Park, on Rugby, believe it or not." It was kinda hard to believe, because Rugby
was THE street in College Park and I would have thought no African-Americans
lived on it. "I lived with my mom, stepfather and half-sister."
I
noticed, without comment, Andreas was using the past tense.
"I am my
mom's school baby: you know, born before she finished high school. Mom told me
who my father was and I went to see him three-four years ago when I was in
middle school. He is a big lawyer in Macon and didn't want anything to do with
me. Even denied I was his. I never saw him again until last year when I started
getting write-ups in the paper about my basketball playing. Newspapers seem to
think they have found a rarity when they have an athlete who is also an honors
student. Anyway, he suddenly became the proud father."
"Much the same
thing happened with my step-dad. He has always made it very clear that the only
reason I was around was because Mom came as a package, which included me. He
grudgingly bought my clothes, paid my school expenses, provided room and board,
but that was all. Ever since I can remember, if I wanted money for a movie or
ice cream cone, I had to earn it. Anyway, when I turned out to be the star
student last year and was selected for the All-State Basketball team, he
suddenly decided he was my father. The two men tried to outdo each other and
suddenly I had the latest designer clothes to wear, shoes which cost more per
pair than what had been spent on a year's shoes before, that sort of thing. For
the first time, I had money for dates and use of the car." Andreas smiled, "I
had to get a friend to teach me to drive because I was never allowed to touch
the car before."
I was wondering where this was headed. I mean the kid
hadn't stopped talking, but he sure wasn't answering my questions. I got the
feeling he thought that if he could keep talking, he wouldn't have to answer
them. I hadn't the foggiest idea what was going on here.
"That's how
things were until last Thursday. When I got home from school Mom was acting
strange. I'm not sure why I knew it strange, the way she was acting I mean, but
I did. When I got upstairs to my room -- I had a room in the attic, unfinished
before I became the favorite son. After the second or third article in the paper
I came home from an away basketball game, to discover my stepfather had managed
to get a bunch of his beer-drinking buddies together and they finished it. It
was away from my kid sister and I liked that. Anyway, when I got upstairs, it
was clear that someone had been in my room. I went downstairs and asked Mom why
she had allowed my half-sister, Octavia, to go in my room -- that was strictly
forbidden. I knew she would have had to let her in since I had a lock on my
door. I put it on even before the room was finished to keep my half-sister out,
as she was constantly messing up my things. Mom and my stepfather both insisted
on having keys. Since that was the only way I could keep my half-sister out, I
agreed. That's the reason I knew if anyone had been in my room, Mom had to have
let them in.
"'Octavia hasn't been in your room,' Mom said. 'I decided to
give it a good cleaning.'"
"Now that was strange because Mom hadn't
cleaned my room in years. She didn't have to. I may have things piled here and
there, but my room was always clean and 'most always orderly. I didn't question
what Mom said, but went back upstairs. It was obvious Mom had gone through my
things." Andreas became very quiet and, before I could say anything, he said, "I
think I need to sleep now". I suspected he had said all he intended to say, at
least for now. So when he closed his eyes, I said, "Fine. I am going to the
cafeteria with Ms. Helms, one of your nurses. We can talk some more when I get
back." I sensed that might or might not happen. Andreas was definitely holding
back something.
I found LaTonya at the nurses' station and the two of us
went downstairs for coffee. We caught up on what had been happening since we
last talked. She asked if I had found someone and I told her no. She told me she
and DeWayne were getting married in June. He'd have finished this tour of duty
and they would get married before his reenlistment took effect.
"He is
going back into the military then?"
"Yes, I don't think he would be happy
anywhere else. I just hope I like being a military wife. Of course, I can still
nurse wherever we show up, as my two-year nursing program will be finished
then," she said. "Find out anything from Andreas?" she asked.
I told her
I had learned very little. "I think he's hiding something, but I have no idea
what," I concluded.
When we finished our coffee, I went back upstairs
with her. When I reached Andreas' room, he was turned away from the door. I
walked over to his bed and saw he was not asleep, but staring vacantly out the
window. Six floors up there was little to see, only the backs of some building.
"Andreas, I know your parents are worried about you and wonder what has happened
to you. I really need to know how to contact them," I said, hoping a more direct
approach might get me further along in finding out about this
situation.
"No need to worry about that," he said, turning his head
toward me. "They know."
"They know you have been beaten up to the point
that you nearly died. They know that?" I couldn't believe what I had
heard.
"Yeah, they know. They were there when it happened."
"When
what happened?" I wasn't getting anywhere.
"When I was beat up," Andreas
answered. "When I got back upstairs, I started putting things back where they
belonged. Mom may have straightened up my room, but her idea of straight and
mine were not the same." Suddenly Andreas got a strange look on his face,
giggled and said, "Yeah, her idea of straight and mine were not the same at all!
Anyway, when I had everything back in its place -- you did promise not to tell
anyone what I tell you without my permission, didn't you?" I
nodded.
"Officer Johnson, I'd like to trust you but I'm not sure I can.
Right now I have a real problem with policemen."
"I know telling you 'you
can trust me' will accomplish nothing," I said, "because you'd have to trust me
to believe that."
Andreas giggled again and said, "I don't know why
that's funny since it's true. I think that shot I got just before you came back
gave me the sillies." That explained why he was giggling and relaxing. "What the
hell, I don't have a hell of a lot to lose," he said.
"You know those
large, low boxes on wheels for storing things under the bed? Well, I had one
which I was sure Mom hadn't bothered to look at. Why would she? It just held
summer clothes and it wasn't time to get them out yet. Nonetheless, I pulled the
box from under the bed and immediately realized she had at least had the box out
and moved things in it. I carefully took out the summer clothes and looked at
the collection of National Geographics I had stored there. Don't you hate to
throw away a National Geographic?" I nodded. "I took them out and got a sick
feeling in the pit of my stomach. I had several stroke magazines in the bottom
of the box, under the National Geographics..." Andreas paused.
"So what's
the big deal? I mean your mom might have gotten upset, but I'm sure your
dad..."
"Step-dad," he corrected me.
"Your step-dad had a
collection of Playboy, maybe even Hustler when he was your age. Most guys have
stroke magazines when they are your age."
"You don't understand," Andreas
said, turning toward the window again. "I didn't have a single copy of Playboy
in the stack."
He was silent, still gazing out the window. It took a
minute or two for the implications of what he said to sink in. "But you did have
a copy of Playgirl," I said slowly.
"Yeah, and Blueboy, Inches, Unzipped.
Yeah." Andreas had not turned toward me and was still looking out the
window.
"And there are no gay black men, right? At least that's the
story."
"Yeah. I sat in my room scared shitless. When Mom called me down
to dinner, nothing was said. It was as though she had not discovered my dreadful
secret. I was beginning to think I had gotten excited for nothing. When dinner
was finished, I cleared the table -- it was my turn -- and as soon as I started
the dishwasher, I turned to go upstairs and, as I did, my stepfather hit me
across the face with his open hand. 'Get your candy ass in the den,
Boy.'"
"When we reached the den, my step-dad shoved me onto the couch and
waved the magazines in my face, then started hitting me, first on one side of my
head and then on the other side, with the rolled-up magazines. 'Just what the
fuck do you mean having this faggot shit in your room? You know damn well there
are no gay son-of-a-bitches in the real black community. It's something you have
learned from whitey. Now some white bastard has done gone and made a candy-ass
nigger out of you. You fuck some other candy-ass boy? You get fucked? You suck
cock? Who you be fucking, Boy? Who be fucking you?' All the time he was shouting
at me, he kept hitting me with the magazines. I had no answer because,
regardless of what I said, he would get even more violent. I had gotten enough
beatings from him to know that."
"See, Kumba Richardson, my step-dad, is
a member of the Red Dog Squad. You know the Red Dogs?" I nodded. The Red Dog
Squad is a crack team responsible for major drug raids and most were part of the
SWAT team as well. They were all big bruisers. "Kumba is one pumped-up dude. He
has been on steroids so long Mom says that's the reason she has had no more
kids. He gets drunk and starts shouting at her for only giving him a daughter.
It gets loud after that since Mom tells him he has no real juice because he's on
steroids. Sooner or later his temper gets the best of him and he slaps her
around. Several times I have pulled him off of her. I wanted to call the police,
but Mom said, 'No, he might lose his job'. Well, he should. Anyway, he kept
screaming and shouting at me. Finally, he grabbed me by the shoulders and got
right in my face, 'Answer me, Boy,' he spit out. You know how I took to being
called 'Boy'. 'Speak. Tell me what is going on.'"
"Stop shaking him so he
can," Mom said.
When he stopped shaking me, I took a deep breath. "Kumba,
no-one made me anything. I mean, yeah, I think I am gay. It's just the way I am.
Women don't turn me on and men do. But no-one made me that way. I just am that
way and, by the way, I am still a virgin."
"Black men ain't 'just gay',"
he said. "You have to be turned into a candy ass by whitey or some Uncle Tom
working for whitey."
"I shook my head, but Kumba started shaking me
again. Mom made him stop and then said, 'Andreas, we just want to help you. Tell
Kumba who you have been with. Who made you a faggot? You got to tell us, Son.'
Again, I told them no-one had made me any way other than the way I was. I also
told them, again, that I had been with no-one. I was a virgin."
"That
really made both of them mad. They completely lost control. Kumba grabbed me by
my shirtfront and started hitting me. Several times he hit me in the face. Mom
was shouting, 'Tell Kumba what he needs to know. Tell him now!' Of course there
was nothing to tell. Mom's shouting inflamed Kumba even more. He was slugging me
in the gut and when I fell, he started kicking me. I finally passed out. When I
came to, I was in the street, lying in the gutter. I was in terrible pain and my
face was cut and bleeding. I didn't know what to do. I don't know why, but I
caught MARTA* and went downtown. I didn't know how bad I looked, but people on
the train kept staring at me and no-one bothered to say or do anything. I had
spent time in the park and most times when I was upset about something I went
there. It was a peaceful place. I guess that's why I was drawn there. When I got
to the park, I went to the duck pond and collapsed on the park bench where you
found me. That's it. Now I guess you have everything you need to know. Now you
can hate me too; I'm just a candy-ass nigger."
I sat in silence, trying
to decide what to say next. "Andreas, I am very sorry you have been beaten and
put out of your house. You are a human being and, regardless of what else might
be true, you have the same rights as any other human being. You have the right
to be free from fear and being put down. I don't hate you. I need to know what I
can't tell as I have to write a report."
"You can't tell who beat me up,"
he said. "If you do, Kumba will lose his job. I can't be responsible for that.
He may have thrown me out, but he is the only support my mom has."
He was
right, but could I hide what Kumba had done to Andreas? While I was thinking,
Andreas reminded me of my promise to keep secret what he had told me. I finally
decided that my promise to him outweighed my obligation to report Kumba. I told
him I would not report Kumba. What I didn't tell him was that I was going to
make sure Kumba knew I had him by the balls and I felt free to squeeze anytime
he stepped out of line.
Monday, when I reported to the station house, I
asked the desk sergeant if he could find Kumba's address. He did and gave it to
me. I didn't know what I was going to do with it, but I definitely planned to do
something.
When I finished my shift Monday night, I went home intending
to just fall into bed, but when I got in bed, I was wide awake. I could see
Andreas' face before me. He was a handsome young man, even his bruised, cut and
swollen face could not hide that. His eyes had captivated me. In spite of
telling myself it was something I dared not think about, I found myself
strangely aroused by Andreas. I was experiencing feelings I had felt before, but
never so intense, and they filled me with both fear and fascination. Clearly
something was going on with me and I didn't know what I should do about it.
Troubled, I finally fell asleep.
Tuesday I kept thinking about Andreas
and what he had told me about his stepfather. I hadn't given it any thought
before, but he had said even his mother joined his stepfather in disowning him.
He was all alone in the world so far as family was concerned. Well there was his
biological father. He was a prominent lawyer in Macon, but that wasn't a big
help. Macon was no Atlanta, but it was large enough to have several prominent
African-American lawyers. I needed the man's name and I was sure Andreas wasn't
about to give it to me.
I finally decided I would go to College Park and
have a talk with Mr. and Mrs. Kumba Richardson. I debated walking from the
train, but when I looked at the street address I saw their house must have been
a mile or so from the College Park station and I knew I would be cutting it
close since I was trying to catch Kumba at home before I went to work. I had
checked the Red Dog schedule and saw he wasn't on duty, but I was. I'd take a
taxi to and from the station and, even at that, I'd be late signing in. I called
in and told the desk sergeant I was working on the case of the young man I found
in the park and might be late signing in. He was easy with that.
When the
taxi pulled up to one of the nice houses on Rugby, I wondered how Richardson
could afford the place. Real estate in College Park was not as expensive as real
estate uptown, but it was not cheap and Rugby certainly was not cheap. I knocked
on the door and a young girl -- eight or nine I guess -- opened the door.
"Octavia?" I asked and when she nodded, I said, "I'm Officer Johnson. Is your
father at home?" She nodded again. "Would you tell him I'd like to see him?" She
nodded a third time and closed the door. I didn't know whether or not she was
going to get Kumba. I waited several minutes and was about to ring the bell
again when a giant of a man came to the door. "Kumba Richardson?" I
asked.
"Yes, what can I do for you, Officer?"
"Officer Johnson,
Mr. Richardson. I need to speak with you concerning a matter I got involved in
last Thursday night. May I come in?" Kumba stepped aside and showed me in to the
living room. He indicated a seat and before I sat down I said, "I think Mrs.
Richardson should be involved as well."
"Irene, get in here. Police
business." Mrs. Richardson came in, drying her hands. "Officer Johnson, Mrs.
Richardson," I said, holding out my hand. She shook hands and also indicated a
seat. As soon as we three were seated, Octavia came into the room. "Octavia, I
think it would be best if you went to your room and played for a few minutes so
I can talk with your mom and dad."
"Do what the man says, Octavia," Mrs.
Richardson said.
As soon as the child was gone I turned to the
Richardsons and said, "I would like to say I have a warrant for your arrest, the
both of you, for aggravated assault or attempted murder and, if it had not been
for your son, I would have. He may yet charge you. I wanted a chance to tell you
that at his request I am holding my report. I know that's against regulations,
but I am sure it is not something you will rush right out and report. Your son
came within half an hour of dying last Thursday night. If he had been somewhere
else or I had not been late making my rounds, he would be cold meat in the
morgue right now. He's not out of the woods yet, but I think he will make it. I
wanted you to know that, but even more I want you -- both of you -- to know that
I have you by the short hair. I don't think you will ever see Andreas again
unless you catch him on TV playing basketball. I just wanted you to know that if
you ever, in any way, seek to harm him or do him dirt, you will both be in
Fulton County jail in a heartbeat. That's all I have to say and I don't care to
hear anything you might have to say except I do want the name and address of his
biological father." As I said that I took out my note pad and said, "His
biological father's name and address?".
Mrs. Richardson looked at her
husband. He nodded and she gave me the information. I wrote it down and said,
"I'll show myself out and please, for your sakes, remember what I
said".
I went from College Park directly to the station house, signed in
and went on duty.
I had deliberately stayed away from Grady after I got
off my shift. I needed to get some perspective on the effect Andreas was having
on me before I went back. When I got up Wednesday, I placed a call to the office
of Jason Stanley Story, attorney-at-law in Macon. He had a good secretary who
was well-trained in keeping callers from contacting the man himself. I had just
identified myself as Aaron Johnson, so she very nicely told me the big man was
too busy to talk with me but she would take a message. "Miss, I am Officer
Johnson of the Atlanta police department and I need to speak to Mr. Story
directly concerning his son."
That got me through to the big man at
once.
I started explaining the situation to him when he cut me short. "I
have talked to Irene," he said, "so I know all about the situation. You need to
know that Andreas is not my son. I have helped him out a bit because Irene and I
had been good friends, but he is not mine. Given the fact that he's a faggot, I
can't have him dragging my name through the mud. I don't approve of what Kumba
did, but neither do I approve of candy-ass faggots. I have sent a check to Grady
and will send more if it is needed to pay his hospital bill, but that's it. I
don't want to hear from him or the Richardsons or you again. I hope I make
myself clear."
"You do and I hope you rot in hell for what you have done
to your son." Story slammed the receiver down, giving me a pain in the ear to
match the pain he had given me in the ass.
I looked at my watch and
realized I had time to go by Grady before I had to sign in. I had mixed feelings
about going, but went.
When I reached Andreas' room, he was awake and
looking much better, although his bruises were now multi-hued. "Hi," I said.
"I'm Officer Johnson."
Andreas gave me a crooked half-smile and said,
"Yeah, I remember that much. I guess I owe you for saving my life, although I'm
not sure. I'm not sure I have a life worth saving."
"Stop the shit,
Andreas," I said. "You have plenty to live for."
"What? Honestly,
what?"
"For starters, you told me yourself you are one of a rare breed --
a true scholar-athlete. You are a good-looking, handsome dude. What else? That's
a heap more than a lot of guys have going for them."
"Yeah, well I guess
I'd trade handsome for a roof over my head, good-looking for a
bed..."
"Not going there," I laughed. Andreas gave me a real smile and
actually blushed.
"Yeah, well I guess I can trade being an athlete for a
table to put my feet under and scholar for clothes on my back. Look, Officer, I
have been kicked out of my house. I guess you don't know Kumba Richardson. He
wasn't playing when he beat the shit out of me."
"I hate to admit it but,
yes, that was pretty obvious from the moment I first saw you."
"I'll bet
he or my mom have already talked to my biological father and he has disowned me
-- again."
"I hate to admit that ass well, but you're right."
"So
what have I got to live for?"
"Everything. I mean it, everything. I need
to check out some things. Who do you trust at school? I'll get the school on
your team."
"Ms. Allen, the senior counselor, has always kinda looked out
for me."
"Does she know you are gay?"
"No, no-one except you and
my parents know."
"Ok if I tell Ms. Allen? It would help if she knew,
since you've got to get everything squared away. Or is there a gay teacher you
rather I talk with?"
"Mr. Stenson is gay and everyone knows it, but right
now I don't think he'd be much help after the Smith affair."
Lakeshore
was a science-magnet school and Bob Smith, a chemistry teacher, had recently
been jailed for sexual shenanigans with six of his students. I'm sure every gay
teacher in the county was on edge as a result. "Ok, but Ms. Allen is all
right?"
"Yeah, but kinda check it out as you talk to her. You can ask her
for my work if you would. The doctor says I am definitely here for several more
days and I don't want to get too far behind."
"I'll get by and see her
tomorrow," I said." I had smiled inwardly when Andreas said Ms. Allen was
someone he trusted. Mine and Andreas' first lucky break. She hadn't been a
counselor when I knew her at College Park High School where I graduated. She had
been a business teacher working on her counselor's certification. We had gotten
to know each other very well. It was not the counselor's shoulder I cried on as
drugs took a toll on my life; it was Ms. Allen's. She had a nephew who had lived
with her at one time, who was into crack, and she understood what I was going
through. My girlfriend and he actually died together, both overdose
victims.
Thursday night I shuddered as I walked by the duck pond thinking
how close Andreas had come to dying. I had tried to imagine how a parent, even a
step-parent, could hate their child enough to beat him to within an inch of his
life and I couldn't.
I finished my shift and when I checked out, found a
note in my box telling me I had an appointment with my commander, Friday morning
at eight. More comp time, but time I needed to get to Lakeshore to see Ms.
Allen. The note gave no hint of what the meeting was about, but it must be
pretty important for the commander to come in Friday morning at eight. He was
generally on a strictly nine to five schedule. I guess that messed up my getting
to Lakeshore and seeing Andreas.
I got to sleep quickly and, before I was
ready for it, the alarm went off. Since I wasn't officially on duty, I dressed
in jeans and a knit shirt and showed up at the station downtown promptly at
7:45. Even at that the commander was waiting for me.
"Good morning,
Johnson. Hope you got a good night's sleep in spite of getting called out
early."
"To tell the truth, sir, I could have done well with a couple
hours more, but duty calls, I guess."
"I hope what I have to tell you
will make it worthwhile. I have an offer to make. Ralph Hicks is a twenty-year
veteran who has just lost his partner to retirement. Ralph is a super cop and
all around nice guy. He asked if he could select his new partner and the chief,
who is a personal friend of his, said he didn't see why not. He has asked for
you. I'm not sure why, but I do know he has looked at your file, going through
it with a finetooth comb. He said he has known you for a couple years, which I
didn't know."
"Neither did I," I said, puzzled.
"Well, regardless
of how he made the decision, he asked for you to be temporarily assigned as his
partner. That way either one of you can get out of the arrangement just by
saying you want out. Ralph is a detective, but of course you won't be given that
rank... well, technically you will have detective rank, but at your present pay
scale plus a small increase. You'll also be working days, starting Monday
morning. In the meantime, enjoy your weekend."
"I guess I have nothing to
say about this new arrangement."
"Frankly, you don't until you have had a
week or two with Detective Hicks. But, I can tell you, I would have given an arm
and leg to have been picked when I was a rookie like you."
"Don't get me
wrong," I laughed, "I'm happy with the assignment. I just wanted to make sure I
knew where I stood. Well, since I've the weekend, I'm off to see one of my high
school teachers."
"I'm sure she will be pleased. My wife's a teacher and
she gets all carried away when a student comes back to see her. Few do. Good
luck, Johnson. I think you'll thank your lucky stars for your new
assignment."
I left and drove to Lakeshore, signed in at the desk and
asked to see Ms. Allen. The secretary rang the counseling center and told the
secretary there was a Mr. Johnson wanted to see Ms. Allen.
Ms. Allen came
to the front office and as soon as she saw me broke into a big smile, walked
over to me and gave me a big hug. "I'm glad to see you, Aaron. I was thinking
about you last week. Come on to my office."
When we reached her office
she wanted to know how I was doing and was delighted about my new assignment. I
also told her I had seen LaTonya at Grady and had coffee with her. We talked a
bit about where I was living, the fact that I wasn't dating anyone, that sort of
stuff.
"Well, this is great, Aaron, "but I sense you didn't just drop by
for a social call. What's up, Mr. Policeman?"
"I'm here to talk about a
student, one who thinks an awful lot of you," I said. "Andreas
Jackson."
"I have tried to get in touch with his mom since I noticed he
has been absent a week without calling or anything. That's very unlike him. The
one time I got his house, his mom refused to talk to me, having his half-sister
tell me he didn't live there any more. Do you know what's going
on?"
"Yeah, I do. His step-dad beat him so bad he almost died." I then
told Ms. Allen all I knew about the situation except I didn't tell her why he
had been beaten.
"His step-dad beat him because he found out he was gay?"
she asked.
I really didn't know how to answer that. I mean, Andreas had
said it was ok, but I wasn't sure. "What do you mean?" I asked.
"You
don't know he's gay? He is. He, of course, doesn't 'act gay', whatever that
means, and he has never said so, but I'd place money on that."
"Not with
me, you won't. Yeah, you're right. He's gay and when his step-dad and mom found
out, his dad beat him to near death, with his mom egging him on."
"What's
he going to do?" she asked. "He obviously can't go back home and that's all the
family he has so far as I know."
"It is. Well there's his biological
father. I called him and he disowned him as well. What can he do?"
"He
could live with you," she said. "Seems a nice arrangement to me. He only has a
couple months left in school. He has an internship this summer at the Center for
Disease Control, which will more than pay his keep. Next fall he has a full
academic scholarship at Emory or Georgia State -- his choice. He's talked about
going into premed and, if he does, Emory would be the better choice. He has a
basketball scholarship at Georgia Tech where he could go as well. He's really
good and basketball may take him far. But if not, his academics will. He'd cost
you practically nothing and I think you'd enjoy his company. He really is a
great kid. Of course, you'd have to shoot straight with him."
"What do
you mean?"
"I mean you are going to have to be honest with him. For one
thing, he will know you are lying if you are -- he has an uncanny knack that way
-- and, for another, he needs to know he ccan be honest with you and the only way
that is going to happen is if you are honest with him. That's all I mean." I
didn't think so, but then I had no way of knowing what she meant if she meant
more than she said.
"I don't know. I mean with his parents knowing he is
gay, they may come up with some weird idea about why I asked him to live with
me."
"If they do, have their asses thrown in jail," she laughed. "Isn't
that how you'd say it?"
"Yeah. Well, I'll give your suggestion some
thought. I have some time since Andreas won't be released for several days.
Which reminds me, he asked that I get his assignments."
"I have them
right here. I got them ready to give to his mom when I thought she'd be coming
by when I contacted her. I guess his books and things are still at his
place."
"Sure. Something else I hadn't thought about. I need to call and
make arrangements to get his things."
"Don't think you need to show up
there."
"I won't. Kelly Moore and his two big bruisers at Buckhead Movers
owe me big time. I don't think even steroid Richardson will take those three
on."
"Aaron, Andreas is too good a kid to lose. Take care of him,
ok?"
"Sure."
"And keep in touch."
"Will do.
Thanks."
"Thanks to you as well."
Before I left the school, I
called the Richardsons and told them to have ALL of Andreas' things ready by
three o'clock. "I'm sending movers around to pick up his things. Make sure you
have everything that belongs to him ready to go. And don't give the movers any
trouble and don't hold back anything that is Andreas'. You wanted him out, he's
getting out. I'll remind you that you don't want to piss me off."
I then
called Kelly at Buckhead Movers. I had pulled Kelly's ass out of a crack a few
months ago when he got caught in a bad drug deal without even knowing what was
going on. He owed me big time and knew it. "Kelly? Aaron Johnson. Need some
help." I explained what was up without going into why Andreas had been kicked
out and Kelly didn't ask. I gave him the Richardsons' address and asked him to
take a truck and a couple of his all-brawn-and-no-brain helpers with him. "You
need muscle who won't question anything you say in case this Richardson guy
decides to cause trouble. If he does, get out of there and call me.
I
went by Grady to see Andreas. "How are you doing, kid?" I asked Andreas when I
met him walking in the hall.
"Pretty good considering I was about dead
this time last week. Now I'm up walking around and really to roll, except I
don't have a place to roll to. Depending on finding a place to live, I can get
out sometime next week."
"That's why I am here," I said. "Ms. Allen had a
suggestion which I'd like for you to think about. She suggested you move in with
me. I mean my place is no palace. It's nice, but small. Only one
bedroom."
"You'd let me live with you?" he asked as if he hadn't heard
correctly.
"Yeah, if you want to."
"Even though I'm
gay?"
"Yeah," I answered.
"The doctor told me I could get out
Monday morning if things kept going well. And I can stay with
you?"
"Yeah. I'll get your things and have them for you."
"How?
Kumba is not going to let you have anything. He claims it's all his. He even
said that before... before he knew."
"You let me worry about that,
ok?"
"Yeah, well, ok," Andreas gave me a huge smile. There was going to
be a real problem here, I could tell. Just what had I let myself in
for?
I left Grady and when I got home, took a real look around my
apartment. It was fine for a single guy, but what was I going to do with
Andreas? I had a king-size bed that just about filled the bedroom. The living
room couch made a bed, but I had slept on it a couple times and, I can tell you,
it was far from comfortable. I laughed to myself when I thought that if Andreas
was a woman I'd probably have no problem sharing my bed with her. She'd be
perfectly safe, but a good-looking stud like Andreas? No way. Sharing a room
with him would be hard -- in more ways than one. Suddenly I said, "Damn! That
Allen knows me better than I do." She definitely sensed I was attracted to
Andreas. I came as close to admitting I was gay as I had ever done, but I
couldn't think the word.
"He'll be asleep when I come in from work and
that would help," I thought. "Whoa, not with my new assignment. Big problem. It
just would not do." I finally decided the only way out was to get rid of the
king-size and get two double beds. They might take up a little more space than
the king-size, but that would work. I'd look on the bulletin board at the
station house. Maybe there'd be something there. I really didn't have money to
run out and purchase two new beds.
As I was standing in the middle of the
bedroom thinking about my dilemma, the phone rang. "Aaron, Kelly. We have the
kid's things. Thought that hunk would give us trouble, but he left and the wife
made sure we had everything. She kept saying she wanted all the evil stuff
gone."
"Thanks, Kelly. I think she wanted to make sure you thought the
kid was some terrible jerk. He's not, he's just a kid whose step-dad decided to
beat the shit out of him." Kelly was satisfied with that and I started to hang
up the phone and as an afterthought, asked, "By the way, Kelly, happen to know
someone who would like to trade two double beds for a king-size
one?"
"Matter of fact, think I might. Had a gal moving in her boyfriend
and both were complaining they had double beds. Of course they were planning on
sleeping together, but a double bed was too small. Guess they don't cuddle in
bed. Dumb, dumb, dumb."
"I have a king-size I'll trade. If they are
willing, you can pick up the king-size when you bring the kid's things, and
bring the doubles back. I'll leave the key with the woman in number one if I'm
not here." The woman in number one was a retired school teacher I kinda looked
out for. She had broken a hip shortly after I moved in to number three, so I did
her shopping and took care of things she couldn't do until she recovered. I made
a friend for life.
Getting Andreas' things and maybe two beds was a big
accomplishment. Pleased with myself, I decided to go back to Grady. Andreas was
up, walking down the hall again when I arrived. "Hey, great to see you're still
vertical," I said. "How you feeling?"
"I have felt better, but I'm ok.
I'd just like to get out of here."
"Release still scheduled for
Monday?"
"Yeah, provided I can give them an address. Something about
having to have a place where they can send the bill, I guess," he laughed. The
kid did have a sense of humor and that was definitely a plus in my
book.
"I'll take care of that when I leave," I said. "Buckhead Movers are
bringing your things as we speak," I told him.
"I hope they were prepared
for trouble," he responded, and got a frightened look on his face.
"No
problem. I told Kelly, who is in charge, to take a couple no-brain, all-brawn
types with him and give me a call if there was a problem. There wasn't -- I
guess because I reminded Kumba that I still had a report ready to turn in. His
balls are in my hand and I squeezed a little," I laughed.
"According to
Mom, you hardly have a handful. These are my balls," Andreas laughed, making a
sphere of both hands. These are my balls on drugs," he laughed as he made a
small circle with thumb and forefinger.
We talked a while longer before I
decided I had to tell him the sleeping arrangements. "Maybe I can afford a
larger apartment later, Andreas, but for now we'll have to share a bedroom. I
don't think we'll be sharing a bed." I told him about the trade I hoped Kelly
was pulling off. "Well, I've got to get to the apartment and see how things are
coming. I'll see you in the morning about ten or so."
Andreas reached out
and gave me a bear hug and said, "Thanks for everything. Even for saving my
life." I knew he meant exactly that. I remembered to give him a card with my
home phone and cell phone number and left.
*MARTA==Metro Atlanta Rapid
Transit Authority (I think). It is Atlanta's rapid rail part of the public
transit.
Chapter 2
When I got back to my
place, Kelly and two huge hunks were taking two beds upstairs. They set them up
and there seemed to be about as much room in the bedroom as before. They had
left the boxes with Andreas' things in the living room. While the two guys were
getting the beds set up, Kelly came into the living room with a box with no top.
I thought it was clothes because that was what was on top. Kelly sat it down in
front of me and lifted the clothes to show me there were magazines beneath, a
Blueboy on top. "That asshole bitch at the house in College Park kept trying to
get that box picked up by those two in there" -- he motioned toward the bedroom
with his head -- "they didn't see what was in the box and when I did, I tossed
some clothes over the magazine and took charge of the box myself. I don't know
anything about what's going on, but it was clear to me that asshole bitch was
trying to get someone in trouble."
"Thanks, Kelly. Yeah, she's trying to
get her son in trouble, can you believe that? Take the magazines with you when
you go and do what you please with them. They are not needed around here," I
said and thought, "Andreas can get new ones, if he likes".
I thanked
Kelly profusely and he and the two bruisers left. The living room was covered
with boxes and I decided I'd see if I could re-arrange things to make space for
Andreas. He said he had never had clothes before he became a basketball star,
but his "dads" had made up for it. That was obvious from the boxes of clothes I
put away. His backpack and school books were about all that was left when it was
time for me to think about dinner. I decided I had had a wild enough day to
warrant going out, but I hated to eat alone. Jerry was with Susan, I was sure,
and I didn't feel like listening to her. I thought about LaTonya Helms and
looked up her number. "LaTonya," I said when she answered the phone, "Aaron.
Just finished a wild day and don't feel like cooking and don't want to go out
alone. You up to dinner with me?"
"Can you give me half-hour, forty-five
minutes?"
"Sure. Probably take me that long to get to College Park. You
think of a good place. You deserve a grand dinner for taking care of the kid.
See you in forty-five."
I showered and got dressed. I looked around the
apartment again and made myself a note to be on the lookout for a desk. I had a
computer desk in the corner of the living room, but Andreas would need more than
that for studying.
LaTonya had decided we should go to Showcase, a jazz
cafe in College Park. The food was really great and the music grand. No-one
rushed us and we had drinks, ordered and took our time eating, all the time
talking about what we had been up to. I told her about my new assignment and she
was thrilled for me. There was a tiny dance floor and we danced between dinner
and dessert. It was a wonderful evening.
We were on the way to her place
before she said anything about Andreas. "He tells me he is moving in with you,"
she said.
"Yeah. I went to see Ms. Allen today. She's his counselor and
he trusts her. She said he needed a place to stay and suggested I take him in.
What do you think?"
"You know he's gay?"
"Yeah. That's why his
step-dad beat the shit out of him."
"And you don't mind?"
"No. Why
should I?"
"Don't pretend you don't know about the black macho attitude
which says there are no real black men who are gay."
"Yeah. I also know
about there being only winning tickets in the Georgia lottery. I sometimes
wonder if whites have as much shit they believe as we do."
"Take it from
me, neither blacks or whites have a monopoly on fantasies. Sure you having a gay
kid living with you won't cause trouble in your job?"
"It better not.
It's not like I'm planning on having sex with the kid."
"Just keep your
ears open. I'd hate for both of you to get hurt because you're being the kind of
guy you have always been. You know, sometimes I almost -- notice I said almost
-- wish I had never met DeWayne. You can mmake a girl feel real good about
herself."
I felt myself blushing as I pulled into LaTonya's drive. "Come
on in," she said as I opened the door for her. "You know you are not going to
get away from here without speaking to my mama. She'll have both our
heads."
Mrs. Helms was waiting up for LaTonya, just as she had done in
high school. LaTonya was her baby and she was proud of her and rightly so. I
chatted with her for a while and then left. It was almost two when I got home
and the new bed felt good. I didn't even feel cramped. I fell asleep almost at
once.
I went by to see Andreas Sunday afternoon after sleeping until ten.
I told him his things were at my place and I had put them away. "Got two beds so
there'll be no bed sharing."
"Afraid I'd jump your bones?" he laughed and
winked, then said, "Thanks. The doctor will be by in the morning and should
release me."
"I'll try to get by and pick you up. I start on day shift
tomorrow so I'm not sure when I can get by. I've been partnered with a veteran
detective."
"Sounds like a promotion."
"Yeah, I guess it is." We
talked about first one thing and then the other. I had brought his books and
assignments. "You can keep yourself busy with school work, I guess."
"You
are not kidding. I'm behind a week and that is major behind in the science-math
program."
"Well, I'm going to run so you can get busy."
"Thanks
again, Mr. Johnson."
"I think since we are going to be roommates, you can
call me Aaron."
I had just got back to the apartment when Jerry called.
"How about we catch an early dinner," he said. "I don't have to sign in tonight
until eight."
"Sounds good. I've got a lot of news."
"So have I,"
he said. "Buckhead Diner at six?"
"Sure."
I went home and gathered
up a batch of laundry -- socks, underwear, that sort of thing. Uniforms and my
slacks and shirts I had done -- and took it downstairs. By the time it was
finished, it was time to head to the Diner.
As soon as I walked in it was
obvious Jerry's news was good. He was beaming from ear-to-ear. We did the whole
hand greeting bit and I sat down. "Don't tell me. You won the Big
Game."
"Even better," he replied. "Bro, I am engaged."
"Susan
finally got tired of saying no, I guess," I laughed and gave him a high
five.
"Matter of fact, she asked me. So there!" He then told me the whole
story and, sure enough, Susan had asked him. Jerry was real hung up about having
been married and was afraid Susan would think he was comparing her to Linda, his
first wife, and somehow or other Susan just came out and asked him. He told me
about their plans and he asked if I'd be his best man.
"Don't you think
one of your brothers should do that?"
"No. Because I want you. Honest to
God, Aaron, there are times when if it hadn't been for you I'd never have made
it. You were a real rock for me, something I had not had in Atlanta after Linda
and Mikey were killed. No, you are my best man, if you'll do it."
"Sure I
will. Good news, Jerry, really good news."
"And you have good news
too?"
"I have news and I think it's good." I told him about my new
assignment and we talked about that. Then I said, "And I'm getting a
roommate."
"Who?"
"Andreas Jackson, know him?"
"Who
doesn't? I mean you'd have to know nothing about basketball not to know Andreas
Jackson. You don't mean THE Andreas Jackson, though, do you?"
"Jerry, you
need to remember I am the only black man under sixty who knows nothing about
football or basketball. So I don't know whether he's THE Andreas Jackson or
not." I then told Jerry all that had gone on while he was wandering in the
hills.
"Aaron, you have to be the nicest guy I know. Yeah, you are one
nice dude. But I can tell you, you better start paying attention to basketball
because you have the makings of an all-star player moving in with
you.
Monday morning I showed up at the downtown headquarters to get with
my new partner. I met Ralph and he said we had some routine work to do as we
walked out to our car. Ralph told me he had asked for this assignment after his
partner retired following a shoot-out with some drug dealers. "I'm too old for
that shit," he said. "I asked for you because I wanted a young partner to keep
me honest and I asked for you because I think you have something special. A kind
of real concern for people. Don't find that often enough in today's police," he
said as we headed toward Midtown.
"Hear you saved a kid's life out here
last week," he said as we drove through Midtown, skirting the park.
"Not
sure about that. Hell, that's a lie. I was just lucky enough to find him before
it was too late." I told Ralph about Andreas, including why he had been
beaten.
"They ought to hang that kid's step-dad up by his fucking balls,"
Ralph said. I was surprised because in spite of Atlanta's supposedly
gay-friendly atmosphere, the police were certainly not known as gay-friendly,
especially the old timers. "Sure learned my lesson about gays several years ago
when my son came out. Made a real ass of myself, but he didn't give up on me.
Kept asking how he was different after he told me from how he was before. Try as
hard as I could, all I could come up with he was more honest after. 'Guess you
like liars better,' he had said. That was like a real kick in the ass. He's the
same son I've always had and I'm really proud of him. Finishing med school at
Emory this year. Working at Grady now. Where's this kid going?"
"He's
coming to my place."
"Old enough not to get you in trouble?"
"He's
eighteen." Ralph nodded. "And I told his mom and step-dad I was holding my
report back at his request. Kumba, his step-dad, is on the Red Dog Squad and
would be out like a shot if I turned in the report or the kid charged
him."
"Red Dog Squad is in a lot of hot water right now anyway, over use
of excessive force and steroid use. I guess that bunch does some good, but at
times I wonder. Every one of them is a big steroid user and that spells trouble
-- excessive force on the job, uncontrollaable tempers, spousal abuse. So you are
taking the kid in?"
"Yeah. Think that's ok?"
"He has no place to
go? Sure it's ok unless you are planning on making him your candy-ass boy. But
even as a lover, I think it's ok. He's eighteen and no-one's forcing him to do
anything."
Ralph had been around the block a few times. He had a gay son
so he must have something to say on the subject. I had already decided I could
trust him so I said, "Ralph, that's the only thing that worries
me."
"That you might make him your candy-ass boy?"
"No, I think I
can handle that." Ralph looked at me out of the corner of his eye, but said
nothing. "It's what people might think."
"None of their damn business. So
long as you can live with your decisions, you're ok. Just be sure you don't just
drift into something. You both can get hurt real bad if you do."
I
thanked Ralph and that was the extent of our conversation about Andreas and he
never asked if I was gay or made any assumptions about me then. But I was sure
he knew, probably more than I did.
We had to go check out a burglary
reported in Vine City and after that bit of business -- Ralph asked some strange
questions I thought -- when we got back in the car he said, "Burglary my ass.
That woman's grandson who lives with her sold stuff to buy drugs and she wants
the insurance to pay for it. All she wanted was a police report to turn in. I'll
bet my next pay check on that."
We rode in silence for a few minutes. I
don't know where my thoughts were and I was surprised when I realized we were
parked outside my apartment. I was puzzled, but all I said was, "Can we park
here?" Ralph had parked in a no parking zone in front of the apartment
building.
"Yeah. I don't see any cops around. Do you?" he said and
laughed. "You did say the kid is getting out of the hospital today, didn't
you?"
"Yeah. But why are we here instead of Grady?"
Ralph laughed
and said, "You might like to see his nice ass hanging out of a hospital gown,
but I don't think he'd believe it was the latest fashion."
So help me, I
blushed. "Guess you're right," I said. "Come on up."
When we got to the
apartment I said, "Ralph, take a look around and give me any suggestions you
might have to help make the place comfortable for me and a
teenager."
"Aaron, it's been a few years since I had a teenager in the
house." He did look around while I got an outfit together for Andreas. When I
had the clothes together, Ralph was standing in the small dining area, rubbing
his chin. "Well, what do you think?"
"You asked me about a desk, and the
kid will need a place to study. But I was thinking, you have this dining area
with a very small table. Ok for your meals and probably not at all too small for
the two of you. But if you had a larger table... well, you could have a place to
eat and the kid would have a place to study, a large place. Most of the time, he
could just leave his stuff on one end and you'd still have a place to eat. I
think we still have a table with six chairs. The ends drop down and it has a
leaf. Without the leaf and one end dropped, it would be just about half again or
a little more than what you have. Then, should you have people in, you could
swing it around, put in the leaf and raise the other end and seat six. I'll
check on that and let you know. Otherwise, I think this is a fine place. Who's
in it and how they treat each other is what's important anyway."
Ralph
looked at the clothes I was holding and asked, "His shoes weren't messed
up?".
When he asked, I had a flashback to Andreas lying in the park and
got sick at my stomach and very light-headed, and the room started spinning.
"Whoa! Take it easy!" Ralph said, as he pulled a chair from the dining table and
eased me into it. "Head between the knees. You know the drill." The next thing I
knew, he was washing my face with a wet cloth.
A few minutes later, I
raised up and said, "I think I'm ok now. Don't know what got into
me."
"You don't?"
"Yeah, well, I guess I do. I suddenly had an
image of Andreas lying in the park all beaten and bloody. I guess it was the
mention of the shoes that did it. That night while I was trying to find out if
he was dead or alive, I was staring at his shoes which looked as if they had
been dipped in blood. He has shoes in the second closet to your right," I called
to Ralph who was headed for the bedroom.
When we reached Grady, Ralph
parked in the tow away zone out front, winked and said, "The salary's not so
hot, but there are perks."
When we reached the sixth floor, Andreas was
sitting in his room using his tray table for a desk and busily working on
something. "How you doing today, Kid?" Ralph asked. Andreas looked up, saw the
uniform and got a frightened look on his face.
When I saw that I stepped
out from behind Ralph and said, "Andreas, this is my new partner, Ralph Hicks.
Ralph, Andreas Jackson."
"Didn't mean to give you a scare, Kid," Ralph
said as he extended his hand to Andreas. "Got something here to cover your
hinny," he said as he took Andreas' things from me. "Scoot in the bathroom and
get changed and we'll be out of here."
"Thank you, Officer," Andreas said
with an ear-to-ear smile. "Back in a sec."
"Nice-looking kid," Ralph
observed. "Seems to have some manners as well. Yep, you are doing the world a
good turn, Officer Johnson." As he spoke, he reached out and rubbed my head. I
guess he would have messed up my hair, but hair a sixteenth of an inch at the
longest doesn't do a whole lot of anything regardless of what you do to it.
"Good job. By the way, while it's on my feeble mind, we don't have to wear
uniforms. I did today because I was sure you would. Only if there's someone
important involved or some other reason to wear a uniform... a neat shirt and
pants is fine. I keep a uniform at the station and a tie in the car. Otherwise
it's button-downs and khakis. And if you're not hung up on labels, Penney's
outlet in Forest Park can probably fix you up for what you paid for one
uniform."
"Shirts are no problem as I wear button-downs a lot when I am
off duty, but usually with jeans."
"Jeans won't do," Ralph laughed. "I
think it's because the commander might have to wear them some time and his ass
is so flat it sinks in instead of sticking out!" We were both laughing when
Andreas stepped out of the bathroom.
"Well, I can't say much for your
make-up kid. I never did think purple, green and yellow looked good on a young
kid but, otherwise, you look great." Andreas' face was still multi-colored from
his bruises, and he still had that fake skin holding healing wounds together,
but he did look great. "Ready?" Ralph asked.
"Let's roll," Andreas
answered with another huge smile.
When we got to the nursing station, the
charge nurse said, "I have called for an orderly to take you down, Mr. Jackson.
Checkout has called up and you are free to go. Everything's been taken care of.
Take care of yourself," she said and hugged the young man to
herself.
When the elderly black orderly showed up with a wheelchair,
Andreas told him he didn't need it. "Son, you knows dat and I knows dat, but Mr.
Grady, he don't knows dat so you either sits or you stays a guest of Mr. Grady."
Andreas smiled and sat down in the wheelchair.
When we got to the car,
Ralph helped Andreas into the front seat. "You get the back seat, Johnson."
After Ralph had buckled himself in the driver's seat, he turned to Andreas and
asked, "Where to? Your new home or an eating establishment?"
"After a
week plus of Grady food, you can ask that?"
"Landmark Diner coming up,"
Ralph said as he pulled away from Grady.
When we were seated, Andreas
seemed ill-at-ease as he picked up the menu. "Kid, I can recommend the Landmark
burger. It's a half-pounder with whatever you want on it along with the 'comes
with it' bacon, two kinds of cheese, mushrooms. I don't know. I've never been
able to handle more than one but, after Grady, maybe you need two. Large fries,
what to drink? Coke? Hey, take advantage of this," Ralph said. "It may well be
the last time I treat you."
I could see Andreas visibly relax. Only then
did I realize he was concerned about not having money. We'd definitely have to
work on that.
Andreas handled the burger, fries and Coke and when Ralph
asked if he had space for dessert, Andreas smiled and nodded. Ralph ordered
three hot fudge sundaes which, I knew from past experience, were worth dying
for. Andreas polished his off as well as part of mine I couldn't eat.
It
was about two when we finished. Ralph got the check and when I protested, said,
"Get the tip," which I did.
By the time we were back at my place and
Andreas had walked up the stairs it was obvious he wasn't in the best of shape.
I showed him the bedroom and suggested he take it easy. "You have my cell phone
number and the lady in number one knows you are my new roommate and will do
anything you ask her to do if she can. I'll be back as soon as I can after
work."
"Take it easy, Kid," Ralph said. By now it was clear that "Kid"
was going to be Ralph's name for Andreas. "If you can't get a hold of either one
of us, call the station and someone will be right here. As of now you are a
police brat and we do take care of our own." In the weeks to come Ralph and my
colleagues made that abundantly clear.
After we left the house, Ralph
wanted to go back to Vine City. "There's a pawn shop there that's more than a
little shady and I suspect we might find some of the stuff the old lady claimed
was stolen from her." Ralph walked into the pawn shop and the man behind the
counter was immediately nervous. "How's business these days, Waldo?"
"No
good, Ralph. No good at all. What can I do for you?"
"Got a list of items
here I want you to check." Ralph handed him the list he made of missing things
from the woman he had questioned earlier.
"Sure, Ralph, sure. Anything
you ask. Is this stuff stolen?"
"Old lady Jefferson claims it was. That
worthless grandson of hers pawn anything recently?"
"I'm not sure, I'll
have to check."
"You do that, Waldo.
Waldo -- I guess that was his
name, but I had already learned you could never be sure with Ralph -- took the
list, looked at it and said, "Think I might help you here, Ralph. Think there
are a few items here the kid did bring in. He said someone had given him the
stuff for working for them."
"And you believed him, of course. Just get
the stuff together and I'll take it home. It's up to you to get your money back.
Or you can press charges and we'll pick up the kid."
"I'll handle that,
Ralph. Here's the stuff." Waldo handed Ralph a box with some silver and other
things in it. "Glad I can help out."
"Thanks. Waldo. 'Til next time,"
Ralph said as we walked out the door.
"He buys stolen goods often?" I
asked, wondering why he got off easy.
"Sometimes. I could bust him, but
he's a good source of information. Any new dealers around, anyone selling who
hadn't been into drugs before, he lets me know. Sometimes I can get to them
before they are really hooked. Well I guess Mrs. Jefferson will have to find a
way to get her money since there'll be no insurance check. She would have gotten
a lot more than the stuff was worth. You can bet on that."
The rest of
the afternoon passed quickly as we had little to do except drive around town.
Ralph was a firm believer in keeping in touch with the man on the street and I
would soon learn it paid off.
He dropped me off at my place at five and
said he'd be home around six if I wanted to come pick up the table and chairs. I
told him it would depend on whether or not I could get one of Kelly's
trucks.
When I got upstairs, Andreas was sitting at the dining table, his
head on his arms, fast asleep. I didn't want to disturb him, but I thought he
must be uncomfortable. I considered picking him up and taking him to bed, but
thought better of it since I might pull something loose or hurt him. I touched
his shoulder and he opened his eyes slowly, looked confused, then saw me and his
face became one huge smile. The kid had a smile that could melt the heart of
anyone. The two big dimples didn't harm his looks either.
"Not a very
good place for a nap," I said.
"Right. Especially since I drooled on a
calculus problem that just about drove me nuts. Guess I wasn't as strong as I
thought."
"Ralph has offered us a table and six chairs to replace the
dining room table so you can have one end for studying, but I think we'll wait
to pick it up. I'll get dinner and you can go to bed early."
It had taken
me about a month to realize that there was no way I could live on frozen
dinners, so I had worked out a system. On the my days off I prepared main dishes
that could be frozen so I didn't have a lot of work to get dinner ready. Last
weekend I had been pretty busy, but did manage to make a batch of meat sauce. I
usually made enough for six meals. All I had to do was take out a frozen packet
and add chili powder and beans for chili, mushrooms and Italian seasoning for
spaghetti, cheese for lasagne. "You up to spaghetti tonight?" I asked
Andreas.
"You'd think I was still full from lunch," he answered, "but I
think I can put away some pasta, Yeah, I sure can."
I popped two packets
of sauce in the microwave to thaw, put water on to heat for the spaghetti, took
a loaf of French bread I had picked up yesterday and put garlic butter on it.
The sauce was thawed so I put it in a pan, added some mushrooms I had cooked in
butter and Italian seasoning and let it simmer while I fixed a salad. I put the
bread in the oven and in a few minutes we had a grand meal. "I'm having a glass
of red with my meal, Andreas. You're underage, but if you'd like one, you can
have it."
"Thanks, I'd like that," he said. Andreas removed his books and
papers from the table while I was preparing dinner and asked where the china and
silver were. He set the table and when I had the food ready, lit candles he had
placed in the center of the table.
"I'm surprised you know how to set a
table, Andreas. Most people don't know how and don't these days."
He
blushed and said, "I wouldn't have, but when I was invited to a big dinner
downtown after being named to the State All-Star basketball team, Ms. Allen gave
me a crash course in how to eat with more than a spoon. I started doing it at
home. Mom liked it, but Kumba thought it was a waste of time."
"Not me. I
set the table when I am eating alone just to remind myself that I am civilized."
I sat down and filled the wine glasses, and was about ready to dive in when I
noticed Andreas was sitting, head bowed. "Just who's the adult here?" I asked
myself. "Andreas, would you say grace?"
I expected a quick kid's table
grace, but I was surprised. Andreas offered thanks for friends who help someone
in need, for me by name and the food. When he looked up, he was misty eyed as he
said, "Aaron, thank you very much for not letting me die. I didn't want to live
when you found me, but now, I'm glad I'm alive."
"So am I, Andreas, so am
I."
Andreas thought he was up to returning to school Tuesday, but I
vetoed the idea. "Not until you have been checked out by the doctor," I told him
emphatically. "Maybe you don't know how close to death you came, but I do. Call
Grady and see when you can get checked out and we'll see about school after
that." I knew that Andreas had been in absolute tip-top shape when he had been
beaten. He was young, so healing could be expected to proceed rapidly, but I
wanted no surprises. "You might call Ms. Allen and get any new assignments and
work on those this morning. I don't know whether I will get by at lunch or not.
If not, I stocked the fridge Thursday so you should find something to eat. I'll
see you at lunch if possible, if not when I get off work. Promise me you'll take
it easy."
"Yes ma'am, Mama," he laughed. As soon as he said that I
realized that he didn't know how right he was! I sounded exactly like my Mom
before she decided to check out of my life. I gave Andreas a careful hug and
went to work.
About 11:30 Ralph said, "Got anything to eat at your
place?".
"Sure. What did you have in mind?"
"Why don't we see what
we can come up with at your place and check on the kid?"
I told him we
might be able to do that. "He seems fit and wanted to go to school today, but I
nixed that until he sees the doctor again."
When we got to the apartment,
Andreas had books and papers spread all over the dining table and was so busy he
didn't hear us come in. "Hey, Kid," Ralph said. "Time for lunch."
Andreas
was startled and let out a yelp. "You guys must be real gumshoes. I didn't hear
you come in. I'll get this mess straightened up shortly."
While Andreas
cleared the table, I got out stuff for sandwiches. By the time I had everything
on a large tray, the table was clear and the three of us sat down to eat.
Andreas again bowed his head and I was surprised when Ralph said, "Good friends,
good meat, good God, let's eat. Amen."
Andreas got a case of the giggles
and when he got himself in hand enough said, "Kinda funny, but it says it
all."
He had called Grady and the doctor who called him back asked a lot
of questions and said he'd like to see him Wednesday morning. He had told
Andreas to get in some walking, but nothing strenuous, and definitely no lifting
and no running, jumping or twisting his body. "He said he sure didn't want
anything inside to tear loose and start bleeding again."
When we were
ready to go, I gave Andreas fifty dollars. "You need to go to Five Points and
get a MARTA card. There's only a week left of this month. I doubt that they have
the new month's cards ready. If they do, get one. Otherwise, just get the week's
card. You'll be riding MARTA to school, I guess. You'll have to ride the train
to College Park and take the school bus from that. Going to make a long day but,
until we can figure something out, I'll have to have my car, at least most
days."
"I had to ride the bus from College Park before," he said. "The
only difference will be getting up early enough to get to College Park in time
to catch it. Ok if I fix something for dinner?" he asked as we were ready to go
out the door.
"Sure, delighted," I said.
Wednesday after work, I
didn't have to invite Ralph up when we arrived at the apartment. "Got any cold
beer?' he asked.
"Sure, want one?"
"Wouldn't have asked
otherwise."
When we got upstairs something smelled very good. Andreas was
working at the stove, but when he saw us, walked over and gave both of us a hug.
"Stay for dinner Ralph?"
"Better not or I'll be in the doghouse, but I
could use a beer."
Andreas took two beers out of the fridge and three
mugs from the freezer. He gave us the beers and filled his mug with iced tea.
When he sat down with us he said the doctor had released him, but told him to
call if anything, anything, concerned him. He also told him he'd like to see him
in six weeks. "Guys, I'm afraid my basketball career is over. The doctor didn't
say so. In fact, he just grunted when I asked him, but I think I can hang up my
shoes. Good thing I hit the books. Also I got two MARTA cards -- one for the
week and one for next month -- so I'm all set to catch the train in the
morning."
"I was just thinking about that, Kid. I think you need a police
escort your first day in case someone gives you flack for laying out of school,"
Ralph said in his "Officer Hicks" voice. "My partner and I will take you to
school."
Ralph arrived Thursday morning, in uniform, well before either
Andreas or I were ready to go. When I opened the door, he walked in, said good
morning and headed for the coffee pot. He had brought the morning paper and took
it and his coffee and went out on the small balcony off the living room. It
didn't take long before I expected him to do that. Even if he came after Andreas
left for the train, he still came in, got coffee and headed for the balcony. He
had never said anything about it one way or another until one morning it was
raining and he had to stay inside. When we got in the police car, he said, "I
hope you know you have a excellent place for just relaxing with the morning
paper." Over the next three or four years Ralph became a regular part of our
morning routine.
When I went to the bedroom to get dressed, Ralph called
after me, "Uniform today, I think". I put back the pants and shirt I had taken
out and got my uniform.
We got to school early and Ralph walked up to the
receptionist and said, "We are here for the Jackson conference". Andreas looked
at me and I looked at him and we both shrugged.
"Andreas, the conference
is in the counseling center," the receptionist answered. I could see the wheels
spinning. She could hardly wait until she spread the news that Andreas Jackson
came in the office with two police officers.
As we walked toward the
center, Andreas whispered to me, "I wasn't told about a
conference".
"Neither was I," I whispered back.
A group of
teachers were gathered in the counseling center reception area and all started
asking Andreas how he was doing, telling him they were sorry he had been hurt,
generally making it known they had been concerned about him. He, in turn,
introduced Ralph and me. Ms. Allen arrived, opened the conference door and
ushered everyone inside.
"Officer Hicks called yesterday and requested
this meeting. Of course, we will need to find out where Andreas stands with
school work and all that, but first Officer Hicks has something for us." Ms.
Allen smiled and turned toward Ralph.
"Ladies and gentlemen, most of the
time when I show up at a high school, someone is in trouble. I'm here today, not
because Andreas is in trouble, at least not with the law, but because you have
an outstanding young man in your hands. I wanted you to know enough to be a help
to him, not only with his education, but also with his larger life."
"I
know Andreas has been working hard since he got out of the hospital, but I am
sure he is still behind some. I ask that you give him time to get all his back
work in. Don't short-change him by letting him slide by. While I am not at
liberty to go into all the details, I will tell you that Andreas was severely
beaten. His beating was so severe, had he not been found when he was, you would
have been attending a funeral. I hope you don't think I am exaggerating. Officer
Johnson was late making his final rounds and found Andreas, passed out. He was
sure the young man was dead. When he felt a faint pulse, he called Grady and, as
I'm sure you know, Grady is the best place in Georgia to be when trauma is
involved. It was a close call, but Andreas made it." Ms. Lisco, Andreas' AP
English teacher, was sitting beside him and she reached over and started rubbing
his back.
"Andreas is doing well. However, he MUST NOT run, engage in any
strenuous activities or lift anything heavier than a book. He suffered internal
bleeding and almost bled to death. His insides are back together -- we think --
but he dare not risk tearing anything loose."
"Again, I am not free to go
into details about how all this happened or why. In time I am sure Andreas will
tell you some of his story, but right now it must not be told. I know there will
be speculation and I am sure wild tales. Andreas did nothing wrong. He was not
and is not involved in any criminal activity. He is safe and well cared for. At
least until he completes high school, he will be living with Officer Johnson
who, for all purposes, is his guardian and any communication concerning Andreas
should be addressed to him."
Ralph nodded to me and I took out my card
case and passed out cards. "Here is my card. My home, the police phone where I
can be reached and my cell phone number are all on it. Feel free to call me
anytime, day or night."
"If for any reason you cannot reach Officer
Johnson, call me." Ralph gave everyone his card as well. "Thank you for coming.
Any questions?"
"Officers Hicks, Johnson, Coach Roberts. I'm sure you are
aware of Andreas' athletic abilities, especially in basketball. I know he's a
senior here and won't be playing for us again, but will he be able to play at
all?"
"Coach, the prognosis is not good, but it's really too early to
tell at this point," Andreas answered.
There were other questions, some
pretty prying, which Ralph handled well. When the meeting broke up, Andreas
hugged both of us and left with a teacher. I was surprised that he had hugged
us, but liked it.
"Officer Hicks, do you think you can keep two of my
boys on the right track?" Ms. Allen asked.
"I'll sure try," he laughed.
"Thanks for setting up the conference. I hope it prevents some of the
speculation. Especially any that might try to find out the reason for Andreas
being beaten."
"Happy to oblige. And I will stay on the teachers who
might want to give him an easy time, at least those in subjects that count. But
I think he will take care of that himself. He's a really good student, one of
few I have ever known, and a real athlete. Do you think he will play
again?"
"I talked to his doctor and he is afraid he won't be able to --
well, he might be able to play, but either would run a serious risk, or be so
cautious he wouldn't be good. His insides took a real beating. But we'll see. I
don't think I'd push the Georgia Tech scholarship too hard just yet. I hope it
is an option, but it may not be," Ralph answered.
When we were back in
the car, I said, "Man, you have been busy as a bee".
"Just wanted to make
sure the kid got all he could going for him."
"And you did speak with his
doctor?"
"One of them. Look, there's no use to worry the kid any more
than he will from what was said in the conference, but his doctor doesn't hold
out much hope that he will be able to play basketball again and certainly not as
well as before. But we'll cross that bridge when we get to
it."
Chapter 3
The next few weeks were very
strange with getting used to a new job and having someone in my apartment.
Andreas was certainly no trouble -- in fact, he was often a real help. So long
as I gave him some indication of what he could prepare for dinner, it was done.
He was an excellent cook and very creative. We had picked up the table and
chairs from Ralph, but Andreas insisted on removing his work from the table at
dinner. I did insist he leave it there when he was doing a project that required
a large, multi-colored chart. It took longer to get it out and put it away than
he had to work on it.
Thursday evening after Andreas had been at my place
for three weeks, Jerry called to say he had the weekend off and asked if I was
free for that mountain hike I had missed. I told him I was not working weekends
-- well one every month or so. "I think soo. I'm sure Andreas can make it without
me."
"Bring him along. Susan has been hounding me about her going. With
her along, the pace should be slow enough for Andreas."
"I'll ask him. I
don't want to force him into anything. What's your mom going to say about extra
bodies?"
"She'll probably raise hell because we haven't been up before.
Guess we need to take both our vehicles in case either of our significant others
needs to come back."
"Vehicles? Jerry, you sound like a policeman," I
laughed. "And what's this about significant others? You have one, but I don't
think I have unless someone is hiding something from me."
"Well, maybe
someone is. Anyway, how about it? Why don't you bring the city boy
along?"
"I'll give you a call as soon as I talk with Andreas. And, Jerry,
I don't mind kidding, but how about no more comments about significant others?
It suggests something which is not true and could do great harm, especially to
Andreas."
"Sorry, Aaron. I know better, but you'll have to admit he is
one good-looking dude."
"If you say so, Jerry." After I hung up, I
thought about what Jerry had said. Joking? I wondered. After all, Ms. Allen had
kinda made the same suggestion. I knew I was pretty mixed-up in my own mind --
or was I just pretending, hiding? From whom? From myself? One thing for damn
sure, any suggestion that Andreas was anything other than a young man I was
providing with food and shelter would probably cost me my job, any relationship
with Andreas, and God only knows what else. Jerry had to know that. And I had
better watch my step.
Andreas had insisted on doing some laundry and I
insisted he not lug a huge basket of clothes downstairs and back up. "You have
been told about lifting," I reminded him. He was right when he said the clothes
weighed less than one of his school books -- of course they are massive these
days. He came back upstairs with a basket of clean, neatly folded clothes
shortly after I had talked to Jerry. When he walked in I asked him, "How'd you
like to spend the weekend in the north Georgia mountains?".
"The land of
Deliverance** and good old-boy rednecks? Think I'll pass on that."
"Just
prejudice. You racist, Boy?" I asked him in my best bro accent.
"Yeah, I
am very prejudiced about staying in one piece after I've just been put back
together."
I then told Andreas about Jerry and his family. "Jerry and his
family have been a real family to me and I love going to the mountains. Jerry
promises easy hiking since his fiancee is going along. It's beautiful this time
of year and if anyone tries to get out of line, Mrs. Coghill will handle it." I
told Andreas about Edward almost using the "N" word and what happened. Andreas
got so tickled he ended up with tears in his eyes. I think more because he had
been so on edge emotionally and was not able to start working through the mess
he had been in.
"I guess if Mrs. Coghill is there for protection, this
black boy would be safe as Moses in his basket," Andreas laughed. "Sure I'd like
to."
"You're going to need hiking boots. Your fancy Nikes just won't do."
I started to give Andreas money and tell him what brands to look for and to make
sure the ones he chose were properly fitted, but there was still time to get the
boots. We went to an outfitters and got the boots. Andreas was surprised at the
cost. "I thought only Nikes cost an arm and a leg."
"The big difference
is these, with proper care, will be good years from now." Andreas wore the boots
home and I suggested he wear them to school Friday. "Not a real break-in, but
enough to show up any problem," I told him.
"Aaron, I can't just keep
taking money off of you. I've got to get a job and help pay my way."
"Not
a very smart idea, Kiddo. The smart idea is for you to keep up your schoolwork
and have a little fun. A job would be too much right now. You are going to have
to think long term."
"So are you. This can't go on forever."
"It
won't. You'll be making money this summer and maybe have a job next fall,
depending on how college turns out, but don't worry about money right now. You
have more important things to worry about." What I didn't tell Andreas was that
the boots were the last big purchase he would be making because I had gotten
into the maxed-out credit cards trap a year or so ago, and when I got out vowed
never to do that again. I still used a card, but it was paid off every month
unless I had to make a major purchase, and then it got paid off in two months.
If I couldn't pay for it in two months, I went without. Andreas being with me
didn't cost a whole lot more but, of course, the utilities and food bills had
increased. But he would never know that.
I called Jerry and told him we
both would be going to the mountains. "Why don't we meet at my place? Even
though we're taking your truck and my Jeep, we can go together."
"Fine.
Think you can be ready by 5:30?"
"Probably, but why don't we grab a bite
to eat and miss some of the rush hour. We'll be going up 575 and you know that's
a parking lot until 7:30 or 8:00. We'll get to your place about the same time if
we leave Atlanta at 8:00 as if we left at 5:30."
"Right as usual, Aaron,
me lad," Jerry laughed. "Better yet, why don't I have Susan whip up dinner at
your place. She can get off work early with no problem."
"YOU have SUSAN
fix dinner?" I asked. Jerry was very much a mountain kind of guy and always
talked as though he was lord and master of his house. But we all knew he was
like his dad had been, very much at the beck and call of his woman -- not that
either were henpecked, they just knew what they had when they found a good
woman. To tell the truth, I was surprised Jerry was dating again because Linda
had absolutely been his life. "I'll let Andreas take the Jeep to school tomorrow
and he can be back at my place by 4:00-4:30 and help out. He's a great cook. We
have everything we need here unless you want steaks."
"You know I want
steak! I'll pick them up when I get off in the morning and bring them over.
Susan can just meet me there." I had forgotten Jerry was still on the night
shift.
"Say, Bro, why don't you get your things together tonight then
come here from work? You can get in your beauty sleep and we'll have dinner and
then roll."
"Sounds good. By the way, have you added Andreas to your
vehicle insurance? If not, you best."
"I'll take care of it tonight."
When I hung up, I looked up the 800 number and called and had Andreas added to
my insurance. An eighteen-year-old male cost a bundle, but being an honors
student got a big discount for him and the fact that he was the secondary driver
helped as well. That finished, I told Andreas the plan. He was hesitant about
taking the Jeep, but I assured him it was ok.
Friday was uneventful to
say the least. In police work, you kinda hope a day is uneventful, but it sure
makes it long. At 4:00 Ralph said, "Let's call it a week". We went back to
headquarters, turned in our reports and were on our way. Ralph offered to take
me home but it was out of his way, so I suggested he just drop me off and I'd
take MARTA.
Susan and Andreas had reached the apartment and had started
fixing supper. "A great cook you rounded up here," Susan said as I kissed her on
the cheek.
"Yeah, think I'll keep him." Andreas dried his hands, walked
over and gave me a hug, a habit he had started almost by the time he first
walked in the door. We had talked about it and he said he had always been
starved for affection and now that he had someone who didn't think hugging made
you a sissy, he was going to make up for lost time.
"Jerry still asleep?"
I asked.
"I guess so, neither of us have been in the bedroom to
see."
"How'd the boots do, Andreas?" I asked. In answer he held out a
foot and said they were fine. I hadn't noticed last night, but the kid's feet
were huge. "I wonder how many cows it took to make those," I joked.
"No
cows, genuine water buffalo," I was told. "Dinner in twenty minutes. Want a
beer?"
"Not just a cook, Susan. He's my houseboy as well."
"Watch
it with the boy stuff," Andreas said, attempting to appear insulted. "Here's
your beer." He handed me a frosty mug which was just what I needed. When I
finished my beer, I went into the bedroom and woke Jerry. I hate people who wake
up cheerful and Jerry was one of those.
"Think I'll shower and change
before dinner," I said.
"I probably need to do the same. I had a rough
night. There was a major free-for-all at the Cheetah Club again. I swear, I
think that place should be closed down."
"Never happen because it brings
in major income for the city from old bald-headed guys, here for conferences,
who go there and watch the bouncing titties. Shower first? I can
wait."
"Go ahead. I need to get awake and I'm not really."
After I
showered and got dressed, I took down my backpack and put in things for the
weekend. When I went back into the living room I asked Andreas if he had packed
and he said he didn't know what to pack. "Take your school stuff out of your
backpack and throw in socks and underwear for two days, jeans and jacket, shorts
and T for hiking, depending on where we hike, and other clothes for around
Coghills' place. Have homework you need to do this weekend?"
"No. Things
are sorta winding down. Now that AP exams are over, physics, calculus, English
and chem are anticlimactic. We are just passing the time in those. No homework
for my photography and PE classes, although I'd like to get some photos this
weekend, but I forgot to get a throw-away camera."
"Know how to use a
good one?" Susan asked.
"Yeah, sure do. Just never had one to use except
at school."
"It's not too far out of the way to swing by my place. I have
a great camera and all the works which I never use. I got used to using a little
point-and-shoot one and since I just do snapshots, that's fine. So my good
outfit I got for high school graduation is just gathering dust. You can keep it
as long as you like."
"Great! Thanks a million!" Andreas said as he
grabbed Susan and started to swing her around. "I forget," he said, when I
started to tell him to watch it. "I'd like to take my sketching things as well.
Is that ok?"
"Sure."
"Sounds like an art trip," Jerry said as he
walked into the room. "Man, I am starved."
"Dinner in a few minutes,"
Susan said as she kissed Jerry.
"Beer?" Andreas asked and, when Jerry
nodded, poured one and handed it to him.
Andreas had already set the
table and, when the food was ready, he and Susan put it on the table and we sat
down. I kinda wondered what Andreas would do about grace since it wasn't
something Jerry and I had observed except at his mom's place. As soon as he was
seated, Andreas' head went down and Jerry's was right behind his. Susan looked
amused for a moment and bowed her head as I did mine. "Good friends, good meat,
good God, let's eat. Amen." Andreas said.
"I'll say amen to all that,
Andreas," Jerry said.
Susan was having beer with her dinner and Jerry and
I had a second one. Andreas had iced tea. The food was absolutely delicious and
we enjoyed it tremendously. Jerry and I cleaned up from dinner while Andreas got
packed. Since Susan lived only a few blocks away, she ran home and got the
camera outfit for Andreas and we were ready to go at seven.
We had a
great drive to north Georgia after we left the metro Atlanta traffic behind. The
night was clear and it didn't get really dark until after 8:00-8:30. There was a
full moon so the countryside was bathed in silvery light. When we entered the
mountains, Andreas was captivated. I was surprised the only time he had been
outside Atlanta was when he was a young kid and spent summers with his
grandmother in Macon. She had died when he was nine, so his memories were of
over nine years ago. The last few years he had gone to Macon, his grandmother
was not up to going fishing with him which he remembered her doing when he was
younger.
Jerry and Susan were ahead of us and pulled off at a lookout.
When the car lights were turned off, our eyes gradually got used to the
darkness. Even well into the mountains, the glow of Atlanta's light could be
seen on the horizon, but there was no light where we were except the light of
the moon and stars. The mountains lay in row after row of peaks to the north,
all bathed in the natural light of the sky. No-one spoke for the longest time,
then I heard Andreas release his breath. "It is so beautiful," he said. "It
takes your breath away." Susan was standing beside Jerry and he had his arm
around her. As I stood, gazing across the mountains, I felt Andreas' arm
encircling my shoulders and it felt so very right.
Once again I wondered
about my sexuality. Having been raised very much in the black community, I asked
myself, "Aaron, are you a candy-ass nigger?" The answer to that was a definite
no, but was I gay? I honestly didn't know and didn't know what would change if I
could/would ever answer yes. All I knew at the moment was that Andreas' arm was
around me, it felt so very right and I had very strange feelings toward him,
feelings which I dare not express and which I better
suppress.
"Beautiful, isn't it? Jerry asked softly. "One day I want to
leave Atlanta behind and come back to these mountains and I'd like for it to be
before I am old enough to retire."
"I don't think I'd like to live here
all the time," I said. "As beautiful and peaceful as it is, I am just a real
city boy. I need the hustle and bustle of the city to keep my blood flowing, but
it sure is nice to be able to get off the fast train now and then. How about
you, Susan? Andreas?"
Susan was snuggled up against Jerry and was silent
for a few minutes and said, "Yeah, I wonder if I could live up here. Not sure I
could, but if I did, I'd have to make frequent trips to the city -- the way you
guys make trips up here, but more often. Maybe I could get used to being here
most of the time, but I'm not sure. It's something Jerry and I are working on. I
hate to be this way, but it may be the one thing that breaks us
up."
"Since this is my first time to really be out of the city -- I mean
really out of any city -- I'm just wandering along. It's sure beautiful but I
think I, like you, Aaron, need the bright city lights most of the
time."
We all were silent again when Andreas cried out "WOW!" as he
pointed to the sky. I thought at first he was referring to the stars -- you
never, ever, see stars in the city as you do in the mountains where there is
little or no artificial light -- but as I was about to comment, I saw the last
glimmer of a shooting star.
"Your first shooting star?" I
asked.
Andreas nodded. "I read about them, but didn't really believe
there was really anything called a shooting star."
"Make a
wish?"
"I did remember that much. I sure did," he said as he turned to
look at me. I could see his eyes sparkling in the star and moon light and it did
things to me.
"We better get moving as we still have miles to go before
we sleep," Jerry said.
"Robert Frost, American poet," Andreas spoke as if
he were on a quiz show.
"Correct," Susan said. "Poem?"
"Stopping
by Woods on a Snowy Evening," my favorite, I think," Andreas mused. "No, I think
The Road Not Taken is my favorite."
"You don't sound much like a
basketball player," Susan said.
"Duh... like, you know, duh... what does
a... you know, basketball, like player... sound, you know, like?" Andreas said
while almost drooling. Susan cracked up and Jerry and I had a good laugh, as did
Andreas.
When we were back in the Jeep, I said, "You keep surprising me
Andreas. I would never have thought you read poetry. I mean other than what you
are forced to read."
"Actually I got turned on to Frost when I was in the
ninth grade. I was assigned to do a report on him and really got into it. Later
I read other poets, but Frost remains one of my favorites -- but I absolutely
get carried away by D. H. Lawrence. I like Langston Hughes among the
African-American poets, but not the usual stuff. Come to think of it, how does a
cop know poetry?"
"Kinda the same as you, but later. I did AP English,
believe it or not."
"Why didn't you go to college, Aaron?"
"Lack
of money -- even with scholarships I had to have money for living expenses. And
after my girlfriend and mom both did themselves in with crack, I felt that
college was a waste of time since I had decided to go into police work. It was
not the worst decision I have made, but it was not the best either. I took a few
courses after I got out of the academy. I want to do more. I don't know that I
want to be a policeman all my life." I soon became involved in my own thoughts
and I suspect Andreas did as well. We both fell silent and we rode into the
night, I think very much in tune with each other.
It was nearly 10:00
when we arrived at the Coghill home place. Mrs. Coghill was waiting for us. She
hugged all of us, including Andreas. "Andreas, if you are a friend of Aaron's,
you are welcome. He's kinda my darker son," she chuckled. "Leave your stuff,"
she said. "Come on in. The pie's awaitin'." Mrs. Coghill always had apple pie
and ice cream waiting for her returning son and those he dragged in. Tonight the
pie was still warm. "Andreas, you still doing ok? Jerry told me you had the
stuffing beat out of you and got rescued by old Aaron."
"Yes, ma'am.
Thanks to Aaron getting all the pieces to Grady in time, I got put back
together. Think I'm as good as new."
"Good! Well when you have finished
with your pie and ice cream, you can get your things and bring them inside.
Susan, I don't know your sleeping arrangements in Atlanta, but in my house I
insist on a piece of paper before there's any bed sharing. All the boys think
I'm old fashion and they are right. Jerry, put her in John's room. Joseph and
Edward may be coming in this week-end so, Andreas, if you don't mind sharing
with Aaron, you two can take the twins' room. I know they won't be coming
in."
"Mom, if they object, I'm sure Susan and I won't mind sharing the
twin's room."
"I suspect that's at least true for you, but you know the
rules, buddy boy."
Since I had been to the Coghill place many times, I
knew the house very well. The Coghills, being all guys, shared a large bathroom.
I guess Susan would be shown the small bath in what was to have been a guest
room until every nook and cranny was occupied by a Coghill son.
"Mom, I
think we better hit the bed. We've all had a full day and I'd like to take a
short hike before breakfast."
"Are you nuts, Jerry? Hike before
breakfast?" Susan asked.
"You don't have to go. No-one does, but I want
to get up to the cliffs overlooking the river for the sunrise. Mom can get you
up in time for breakfast when we get back,"
"Thanks. I like that idea
better."
After our good nights, we all went to our rooms.
Since
Andreas moved in, I had been pretty careful to allow him privacy such as when he
was getting undressed for bed. We both had been sleeping in boxers although I
had slept in my birthday suit before his arrival. A couple times I think he
started to get into bed nude and remembered. At least it seemed that way.
Tonight we'd share a bathroom with Jerry. "Guess we better just get dressed for
bed and then do the bathroom bit," I said as I started getting undressed. When
Andreas stripped, I glanced up into a mirror which displayed him in "full
frontal nudity". The kid came with a nice set of equipment I thought, and
quickly realized what I was doing and blushed. Dressed in boxers, we grabbed our
toiletry bags and went to the bathroom. Jerry was already there, brushing his
teeth.
When he finished he said, "Andreas, I want to watch the sunrise in
the morning. The only disadvantage to that is we'll have to leave here about
four-thirty, quarter of five. Are you planning on coming, Aaron?"
"I hate
the hour, but you know I'll be there. Andreas, I'll set the clock in time for us
to get up and get dressed and you can get up or not as you please."
"To
be honest, it would be a totally new experience for me. I don't ever remember
seeing a sunrise. I think I can crawl out of bed. We'll see."
After we
got into bed, Andreas was asleep and snoring softly in no time at all. I wasn't.
I was really working myself into a mess about my sexuality. My girlfriend and I
had sex and it was great. In thinking back, that was what it was, sex. I mean I
liked her, but love? To be honest, I hadn't loved her. Before she overdosed, we
had stopped having sex. Not by her choice, but by mine. I knew enough about the
crack business to know that if she needed to, she'd trade sex for crack and I
had seen a high school friend die from AIDS, the result of passing a needle
around, and no sex was good enough to make that a good trade.
I long ago
admitted to myself that LaTonya turned me on a lot more than she thought. Of
course, she had hinted that I was gay so I guess she would miss some of the
erections she had given me just by being nice. But she had hinted that she
thought I was gay. So had Ms. Allen. Even Ralph had kinda questioned me about
it. I supposed I should have reacted one way or another to the hints, but I
didn't. I guess I didn't because I wasn't sure myself. I do know one thing, when
we were at the lookout tonight, I got a raging hardon when Andreas just draped
his arm over my shoulder. And a couple times recently when he hugged me, I had a
sudden and strong urge to kiss the guy.
I guess I needed to talk to
someone, maybe the department's shrink, but that might put my job on the line or
at least make it tough. I couldn't talk to Andreas. I could, but it wouldn't be
fair. He already thought he owed me big time and, since he knew he was gay, he
might feel obligated to do something with me. I liked the kid a lot. I loved the
kid as a big brother should and it better stay that way for his sake. Obviously
nothing was going to get settled tonight and I finally drifted off to
sleep.
When the alarm went off, I was very confused. I wasn't in my own
bed and for a moment I didn't know where I was. I was confused for only a moment
because Andreas immediately got me squared away when he groaned, "I hope to hell
a sunrise is going to be worth it".
We went to the bathroom, both
sporting piss hards which were impossible to hide. After a piss, we brushed our
teeth, washed our faces and went back to the room and got dressed. "I hope your
boots are broken in enough. You did wear them to school, right?"
"I
should be earning a commission from all those sold this weekend because of my
wearing them," Andreas laughed. "They are going to be the latest fad at
Lakeshore."
Jerry came to our room and said, "Are the sleeping beauties
ready for a short walk? I have some coffee in a thermos and some energy bars for
when we reach the cliffs."
The three of us walked in silence, single file
as the path was narrow. Before we reached the cliffs, the roar of the river
cascading over a series of falls could be heard. Suddenly the path seemed to
widen and Andreas, walking ahead of me, was ready to charge ahead. I reached out
and grabbed his jacket and said, "Better slow down, Hoss, or your next step will
be into pure mountain air."
The path ended abruptly at the edge of the
cliff, which was a couple hundred feet above the river. The sky was quite light
and the river visible below. "WOW!" Andreas said, just as he had done last
night. I remembered the first time Jerry had brought me up here and that had
been my reaction as well. Jerry walked out to the edge of the huge shelf
overhanging the cliffs. I always got a strange feeling when I walked out to sit
beside him. Andreas seemed to have no fear of heights at all as he walked onto
the rock and sat down between my legs and draped his arms over them, pulling my
legs to himself.
Jerry opened the thermos, took three cups from his
backpack and poured coffee for us. He then handed us a couple energy bars and we
sat, silent, drinking our coffee and eating. The sky was gradually growing
lighter and suddenly the fingers of dawn shot into the sky, fingers of reds and
oranges. Andreas' sudden intake of breath broke the stillness, which before had
been broken only by the sound of the river far below.
We sat for, I
guess, half an hour, all in silence. Finally Jerry said, softly, "I could be
here every morning and never tire of the sunrise. Every day it is
different."
Andreas answered, almost in a whisper, "Thanks, Jerry, it
sure was worth the trip. Yeah, I think I could join you." And Andreas was
definitely not a morning person.
As we walked back to the house, unlike
our trip up to the cliffs, we talked. Jerry asked Andreas what he wanted to see
while he was in the mountains. Andreas responded he didn't know because he had
never been anywhere that wasn't inhabited. "The wildest place I have ever been
is the park," he said.
"And the wildest things there are the people,"
Jerry laughed, and Andreas joined in his laughter. "Aaron, you have any
suggestions for hiking?"
"Since we will have Susan and Andreas, it needs
to be a hike for seeing, not speed hiking."
"Yeah. I'll come up with
something. Now I am ready for breakfast, one that I don't have to
cook."
"As I recall, that's the kind you usually have, a Waffle House
special," I said and Jerry laughed.
We were nearing the house and, like a
horse, the closer to home he got, the longer Jerry's strides became and the
faster his walk. It was just 6:30 when we got back, ready for a shower and
shave.
Ms. Coghill was busy cooking when we walked in the kitchen door.
"You have thirty minutes," she said as Jerry kissed her on the
cheek.
"Susan up?"
"Don't think so," she replied. "Morning Aaron,
Andreas. Sleep well?"
"Sure did and I'm starved," Andreas
replied.
"I'll take care of that as soon as you take care of the shower
and shave bit."
As I said, the boys' bathroom was very large. There were
two showers and two basins on either side of the door and two toilets in stalls
in a room beyond the bath. Jerry headed straight to the toilet and closing the
stall door. Andreas and I shared the remaining toilet for a piss. I know it's
kinda hard to believe, but we had never seen each other nude. Well, thanks to a
mirror, I had seen Andreas last night. Andreas said, without embarrassment,
"Both pretty well-hung, I see". I blushed.
When Jerry came out of the
toilet, I asked him how we should dress. Sometimes when we were getting ready
for a hike, Jerry would say, "Better wear jeans," because we would need
protection for our legs. At other times it was definitely shorts and Ts,
especially in the summer. Of course late April was not generally warm in north
Georgia, but it seemed unusually warm as we were walking back from the cliffs,
especially for early morning.
"It's going to be a shorts and Ts day," he
responded. "If you want to make sure, throw a light jacket in your backpack."
Jerry was the only one with a backpack for our predawn stroll, but everyone
would be carrying one for the day. Each of us would carry food and water -- but
if Jerry chose the right route, there was a stream from which it was safe to
drink, about half-way to where we could eat lunch. Andreas, of course, was
packing a camera bag full of goods, so I offered to carry both our part of
lunch. He accepted, which was somewhat of a surprise since he usually asserted
his independence.
Andreas and I got dressed and went to the kitchen.
"Need any help?" Andreas asked Mrs. Coghill.
"Seems Jerry is hiding so
you can do his job and set the table. Plates and all up there," she said,
pointing to a cabinet with the spatula she had in her hand, "silver in that
drawer," she said pointing again. "There'll be six of us. Edward came in last
night. Aaron, if you will fill water glasses and get the napkins, we'll be ready
when the latecomers arrive."
As she spoke, a finer-featured version of
Jerry walked into the room, dressed in shorts and a T, barefooted. It was
Edward. He, as all the Coghill boys, had their mother's coloring -- dark, dark
brown eyes, dark complexion, black hair. Some of the boys had curly hair, some
straight. Edward was definitely from the curly side of the family. His longish
hair framed his face in curls. He had his dad's height and build, over six feet,
and had a well-defined body which was lean and clean. Jerry told me when he got
to high school some of the bullies took him on, thinking his lack of sheer bulk
meant he was a weakling. "They learned otherwise and often had to apologize from
the ground, and word got around quickly," he had said.
"Good to see you,
Edward," I said. "This is a stray I picked up off the street," I said, pointing
to Andreas. "Andreas Jackson, Edward Coghill." The two shook hands.
"This
is a surprise," Edward said. "Andreas Jackson was just picked up off the street
or did you kidnap him so you can get ransom from the NBA?" he laughed. "Saw you
in the State All-Star game," Edward said. "You're awesome."
Andreas
smiled and said, "Thanks."
Susan and Jerry finally arrived and we all sat
down at the table. "Edward," Mrs. Coghill said, and Edward said
grace.
The table was loaded with biscuits, hot country sausage, scrambled
eggs and fried apples. "Andreas, you need to know the sausage is great, but
definitely pepper hot and I don't know whether you have ever had fried apples or
not. I hadn't the first time I came, but if you have or haven't you are in for a
treat. But even better will be next fall when apples are fresh."
We all
fell to eating and there was little talk for a few minutes, then everyone kinda
slowed down. "Edward, how much longer before you are home for the summer?" Jerry
asked.
"I finish in three weeks. Not sure I will be home though. I'm
giving some thought to going to summer school. I want to get more of the hard
stuff out of the way before I transfer to Emory next fall. I have already been
accepted and, with summer school, I would be an advanced sophomore when I get to
Atlanta."
"What's your major?" Andreas asked.
"I'm taking a
liberal studies program which is designed as pre-law. I hope to go to Emory
School of Law. Where are you headed next year?" Edward asked.
"Not sure.
I have scholarship offers from Tech, Emory and Georgia State. Tech is a
basketball scholarship. I guess if I could be sure I'd make the NBA, I'd take it
for the money, but sooner or later I'd like to get into medicine and if I got in
the NBA, I'd probably be too old to get accepted to med school. I'm still not
sure. Then, well, my basketball career may be over. Tech expected me to sign
with them a month ago, but I couldn't make up my mind. Now, I don't know..."
Andreas didn't say why his career may be over and I said nothing.
"Must
be good to have options," Edward said.
"Need I remind you, you would have
had options had you not thought partying was what high school was for," Mrs.
Coghill said.
"Mom," Edward whined.
"It's true," Jerry said. "But,
Mom, he really did a turnaround before his senior year in high school and this
year in college, a turnaround that Emory recognized and accepted him. I'm proud
of him."
"So am I," Mrs. Coghill said. "But he needs to remember why his
options were limited."
"So what are you up to this weekend, Edward?"
Jerry asked.
"Nothing, I guess. I just wanted to get away before I get in
the final exam rat race. Why? You have a suggestion?"
"We had planned on
a hike today but, with you here, we could pack enough stuff for an overnight.
Anyone interested?"
"You mean out in the woods with bears and tigers and
stuff?" Andreas asked. I looked at him expecting to see a smile on his face but,
when I looked, he wasn't kidding.
"Yeah, and the guys from Deliverance as
well," Edward laughed. Andreas blushed and got a shy grin on his face. "I take
it you have spent most of your life in the city."
"Yeah, I spent some
time in summers with my grandmother in Macon and we went fishing some, but that
was practically in the town."
"You'll be in less danger from wild animals
in the mountains than you are from the wild people in Atlanta."
"You
expect me to go off into the woods when there are a flush toilet and hot shower
here? No, thank you," Susan said.
"Ah, Susan, you don't want to be a
spoilsport," Jerry said.
"Look, Jerry, I like it here at your mom's
place. I'd like to have a get away place here in the mountains. That doesn't
mean I'm interested in the outdoors: roughing it, hiking and all that sort of
thing. No, thank you!"
"Ah, Susan," Jerry was sounding like a kid begging
a parent.
"Jerry, you can come back later and you men can camp out. Susan
doesn't want to. You brought her up expecting a hike, not a camp-out," Mrs.
Coghill chided Jerry.
"I can go back to Atlanta," Susan
offered.
"Nah, I just thought since Edward was here, it would be a good
time. We can come back later," Jerry said, but I had known Jerry long enough and
we had been close enough for me to see he wasn't as at ease with the situation.
"Edward, want to go along? Easy hike to High Falls, lunch and Eagle's Nest for
the sunset."
"You're walking back in the dark? That's an adventure if you
know the way," Mrs. Coghill said.
"Nah, I thought Aaron and I could drive
up to Eagle's Nest and leave his Jeep and drive back here. Then after the
sunset, we could all come back in the Jeep."
"Sounds like a winner to
me," Edward said. "What are we waiting for?"
"For you to help Mom clean
up after breakfast and get lunch packed while Aaron and I take the Jeep to
Eagle's Nest."
"Ok, let's get on it, Edward," Andreas said as he got up
and started clearing the table.
"I can clean up," Mrs. Coghill
said.
"No doubt," Andreas said, giving her his brightest, double-dimple
smile. "Edward and I probably won't do it as well, but we'll do
it."
"Then I'll start getting a lunch together," Mrs. Coghill
said.
"Tell me what to do and I'll help," Susan said.
Jerry and I
drove to a clearing near Eagle's Nest, parked the Jeep and drove back to the
house. Jerry was uncharacteristically silent. I started to ask him what was
wrong, but decided against it for two reasons. First, I knew what was wrong and
second, he knew me well enough to talk to me if he wanted to.
When we
reached the house, Andreas and Edward were running around like two young puppies
at play. It was refreshing to see Andreas so relaxed, not that he had been
withdrawn or anything. He had broken down and cried a few times when he was
telling me something about his life before and after he had been put on the
street, but generally he had seemed ok. Watching him now, I
wondered.
Susan and Mrs. Coghill had packed a picnic lunch, which had
been distributed among backpacks belonging to the males. Susan had a practically
empty backpack, I guess just her light jacket and nothing else. Jerry handed her
a first aid kit which she placed in her pack and we were off, Jerry and Susan
holding hands leading the way, and me bringing up the rear. Andreas and Edward
were still acting like young puppies darting off the trail here and there,
Andreas with Susan's camera at ready. We hiked at a lively clip for a half hour
without stopping. When we reached an outcropping overlooking a deep valley,
Jerry asked, "Anyone for a break?" and stopped when Susan answered in the
affirmative.
Jerry and I have been on this trail before and this was a
favorite spot of mine. The outcropping extended a couple hundred feet out over
nothing, just several hundred feet of clean mountain air. Water bottles came out
of backpacks and after we each had downed half a bottle, we all sat down, Susan
between Jerry's legs, her arms over his knees as Andreas had sat with me
earlier. The two boys sat side-by-side, still and silent for a
change.
The view from the outcropping was awesome and we were all
drinking it in. I thought back to the first time Jerry and I had climbed to this
point and how awestruck I had been. It was hard to tell Andreas' reaction as he
sat very still, gazing across the valley. After a fifteen-minute or so break,
Jerry stood as did the rest of us except Andreas. No-one said anything for a
couple minutes then Jerry asked, "Ready to go, Andreas?".
Andreas reacted
as he would have being awakened from a dream. "Oh, sorry. I could stay here the
rest of the day," he replied softly. "It's strange, it's scary, knowing you are
hanging in midair, but awesome too. Well, I guess awesome is scary," he said
with a kind of puzzled look on his face. He stood slowly and we moved out in
silence for a while, then the two boys started running about as
before.
It had been almost nine when we left the house. Jerry and I would
have left after the sunrise and not gone back, but this was something new to
Susan and Andreas and to make a hike look like work rather than pleasure could
ruin the whole idea for them.
After another forty-five minutes or so of
hiking we reached another favorite spot of mine. The trail was level for about
half a mile with a small stream running beside it when, suddenly, it turned
sharply and just ahead was a wall of rock, I guess fifty or sixty feet high.
Pouring over the edge was a waterfall, not a large one, but very pretty. Jerry
had told me it was called Bridal Veil Falls and it was easy to see why: because
the water coming over the end of the cliff looked lacy.
There was no
basin at the bottom of the falls. Instead the water flowed down through round
rocks, reappearing as the small stream some distance from the falls. "Anyone for
a drink?" Jerry asked as he held a cup under the edge of the falls. Andreas was
first in line and after gulping down a cup full said, "Man, that is cold! I
thought about a quick shower, but no thank you! The water is icy, and even
though I don't like a hot shower except for relaxing, it isn't warm enough in
north Georgia for me to get under that falls!"
Everyone drank from the
falls and we emptied our water bottles and refilled then with the cold water.
"Everyone's feet doing ok? The going is rougher for a mile or
so."
"Rougher than it has been?" Susan asked. She was sitting on a rock,
taking her shoes off.
"Yeah, we're going to be doing some serious
climbing -- I mean there is a trail, it's not mountain climbing as you might
think about mountain climbing, but the trail is steep. Susan, you are wearing
footies? You need socks," Jerry said as he opened his backpack and took out a
pair of heavy socks. "Footies don't soak up sweat and you sure don't want wet
feet for the next few miles."
"Miles? Did you say miles?" Susan asked, as
she took off her footies and put on the socks Jerry gave her.
"Yeah,
we've got about a couple miles before we reach the spot for lunch. You doing
ok?" Jerry asked Susan as he sat down beside her.
She looked at him with
a half-hearted smile and said, "Sure. I guess I never thought we'd be walking so
far and so fast. But, yeah, I'm ok. Thanks for the socks."
"Are we ready
to move?" Jerry asked.
"Let's gooooooo," Edward said and started toward
the trail that went up the side of the falls in a kind of natural steps. Being
natural, the steps were not even and wound back and forth like switchbacks on a
mountain road. As a result, Edward and Andreas, who were ahead, didn't look back
at us but down on us. Jerry was walking ahead of Susan and often stopped, turned
and extended his hand to help her up when the steps were far apart.
It
wasn't long before Edward and Andreas were no longer playful puppies, but tired
ones. I knew they would run down when they had approached the falls' path as if
it was nothing.
Jerry and I both stayed in good shape -- Jerry had to get
on my case after I partnered with Ralph, since Ralph's idea of a heavy workout
was hefting a couple large beers, and I just couldn't seem to find the time for
a workout on my own. Jerry suggested we work out at the beginning of his shift
and end of mine. That was working fine. Andreas asked about joining us, but I
wasn't about to let him start a workout before his doctors gave their ok. So far
they had nixed the idea.
Andreas had asked questions about when he could
start exercising and was told he could walk all he wanted to, but no workouts
and no running. When he asked the doctors why, they just said they had to be
sure all his internal wounds had healed. Andreas hadn't said anything about it
to me and I didn't feel I could ask him about the situation. Not because of him,
but I was afraid I'd let slip what the doctors had told me. There were very
serious doubts about Andreas ever playing basketball again. I didn't understand
all the technical jargon, but what it all boiled down to was that while Andreas
was lying on the floor being kicked repeatedly by Kumba Richardson, his insides
were bruised and organs torn and ruptured. He really was lucky to be alive,
especially since he seemed in such good health.
It was forty-five minutes
after we started up the trail beside the waterfall when we reached the top. All
of us were sweaty, breathing hard and ready for a break, even though the
distance we had traveled was less than a quarter mile. The top of the cliff was
very deceptive since it appeared to be a kind of mountain meadow with a small
stream flowing through it. When we reached the top, we all flopped down on the
grass and pulled out our water bottles and drank deeply.
After a
fifteen-minute break, we started the last bit of the hike before we'd eat. The
hiking was easy as we walked along the grassy bank of the small stream. Jerry
and Susan were again walking side-by-side, holding hands. Susan seemed to be
enjoying herself again, but she was definitely an unhappy camper when I reached
the top of the falls. Edward and Andreas had recovered and were again running
ahead, veering off into the woods at the edge of the grassy stream bank. I was
glad I had insisted Andreas buy several rolls of film because he was using it
like it was going out of style.
We were walking like we were out for an
easy stroll, so it took a while to reach the turnoff when we left the stream and
walked into the forest. The trail we took wandered through huge old trees,
forming a leafy arch over our heads. As we walked, Andreas stopped and waited
until I caught up with him. When I did, he wrapped his arm around my waist and
motioned for Edward. When he came over, Andreas slipped his arm around Edward's
waist and the three of us walked together. "Old friend and new friend," Andreas
said. "Thanks, Aaron."
"For what?"
"For everything, but especially
for today. It has been wonderful. I never knew the world could be so beautiful,
so interesting, so exciting."
"Thanks to you for making me see it again,
with new eyes."
"Yeah, that's what it is," Edward said. "I have been
wondering what made today different from all the other times I have been hiking
here, but that's it! Andreas has made me look, I mean really look. It's almost
like I was hiking in a place I had never seen before."
The three of us
walked arm-in-arm until we reached a glade surrounded by huge old oaks. "Anyone
for lunch?" Jerry asked, as he dropped his backpack on the ground.
"As if
you needed to ask," Edward laughed, dropping his backpack.
We opened our
backpacks and soon had our picnic spread. Along with cold fried chicken, Mrs.
Coghill had put potato salad -- "I'll put this is Jerry's backpack with two
bottles of frozen water so it won't spoil and make you sick" -- pork and beans,
carrot and celery sticks and fried-apple pies for dessert. She had also included
plastic forks and a plastic table cover, which we spread out in a sunny spot
near the middle of the glade.
When we had finished eating, there was
nothing left of the food except chicken bones. Jerry opened his backpack and
took out five folded sheets of plastic. "If you're going to take a nap, you
might want to put one of these under you to keep you off the damp ground." He
took two of the sheets and he and Susan moved across the glade from us -- not
private, but not right under our noses.
I spread my sheet and lay down.
When I did, Andreas spread his next to mine, but perpendicular to it. He lay
down with his head on my chest. "Hey, I like that idea," Edward said, as he lay
down with his head on Andreas' chest. I might have thought something was going
on here if I wasn't so tired and sleepy, so instead I drifted off to
sleep.
**Deliverance: novel by James Dickey set in north Georgia
mountains. The major characters are city boys, most of whom suffer at the hands
of north Georgia rednecks, including a homosexual rape. All of the characters
except one die during the weekend outing. Made into a movie with Burt
Reynolds.
Chapter 4
I expected us to take a
short nap, but I guess no-one was anxious to get moving again, because Jerry
shook the three of us awake after an hour's nap. "Aaron, what do you think? We
can get to Eagle's Nest either by way of the Alpine Meadows or the
Cascades."
"You know what my choice would be," I said. "I'd always choose
the Cascades but, since Susan is new to this, Alpine Meadows is definitely an
easier hike. It would take about the same length of time since Alpine Meadows is
easier, but longer."
"Or we could split up," Edward said. "I know both
routes as well as you do."
"Ok, Susan and I will take the Alpine Meadows
trail. Aaron?"
"I said I would choose the Cascades trail but, if you and
Susan don't mind, I think I'll tag along with you."
"Andreas, the
Cascades trail is pretty steep and rugged, but it is beautiful. It is up to you.
I'll hike either one," Edward said.
Andreas looked at me as if asking for
permission. That was something we had to talk about. I certainly didn't want him
looking at me as a parent, although I did some of the duties of one I suppose,
but I was not his father. "Andreas, the Cascades trail is really beautiful, but
is very rugged. You need to decide whether you are up to it or not."
"I'm
fine," he answered. "You don't mind if I go with Edward?"
I started to
ask "Why should I?" but thought better of it and just said, "Not at
all".
We all got our backpacks on, after making sure we had all our trash
in them, and started. Shortly after we left the glade, we separated.
The
Alpine Meadows are a series of mountain meadows rising in what were natural
terraces. The slope was gentle, but constant, between the stone ledges forming
the terraces. Some of the terraces were very steep, essentially straight up, but
they were never very long so hiking was generally very easy. A couple times
Jerry went on ahead so he could help Susan up a ledge which was very steep and
with few footholds, but she seemed to be enjoying the hike, unlike the morning
one.
About half-way across the meadows was a huge boulder, twenty or
thirty feet high at the front and ground level at the back. The three of us
walked onto it and to the forward edge. The day had been cool and, when we got
to the top, there was a gentle breeze which seemed almost cold -- since we were
all sweating from exertion getting to the top of the boulder. The sun had warmed
the rock and it felt soooo good when I lay on my stomach, looking across the
valley to rock cliffs on the other side. After lying on my stomach for a while,
I turned over and watched the white fluffy clouds moving slowly across the sky.
After several minutes I laughed when I realized I was playing a game I had
played as a child -- imagining the clouds were first one thing and then
another.
"Something funny, Aaron?" Susan asked.
"Yeah, see that
cloud up there? It's Mickey Mouse. See? There's his ears and there is his nose,"
I said as pointed out parts of a large cloud almost overhead.
"Look, he's
changing into a duck," Susan laughed.
"You both have lost it. A cloud's a
cloud," good-natured and literalist Jerry said.
"Use your imagination,
Jerry," Susan said.
"I did, and it's still a cloud," he
replied.
Our talk drifted from one thing to another. Susan asked about
Andreas. Jerry told her about his being beaten, but not why. She was very clever
at probing for an answer to that question, but I was clever enough to realize
what she wanted and not to give it to her. Jerry asked what the latest from the
doctors was. "There was good news and bad news," I answered. The good news is
that he's doing very well. The bad news is that he probably will never play
basketball again and may have to restrict other activities. I don't understand
it all, but one of his doctors said, 'Look, his insides took a real beating and
think about it as leaving some weak places which could bust loose if he overdoes
things'. He seems fine, but I worry. He has an MRI and CAT scan next week and
they should give a more definite answer about the future. I don't know how he
will take it if he is told no more basketball. He had been told he had a clear
path to the NBA, and being told the fame and money are not to be is bound to be
a blow. We'll see."
"I guess a final decision may come as a blow, but he
certainly seemed at ease when he told Edward his career might be over. I think
being a doctor is more important to him than fame and money," Susan
said.
"Yeah, and I hope you're right," I replied.
Lying on the
warm rock made me sleepy, so sleepy I was reluctant to get up and get moving --
as were Jerry and Susan -- but finally we did. We hiked at a leisurely pace,
stopping when something interesting caught our attention. We finally reached
Eagle's Nest half an hour or so before sundown. I had expected the two boys to
arrive before us since they could move at a good clip without Susan and both
were in good shape, so while the trail was strenuous, the distance was much less
than the meadows trail and they should have been present, but were not. As time
passed, I began to get worried and I could see Jerry was as well, but neither of
us said anything -- to avoid upsetting Susan.
After waiting twenty
minutes, and growing increasingly anxious, I said, "I think I'll go down the
Cascades trail and see what's holding up the guys."
"Sure you know the
trail?" Jerry asked.
"Yeah, no problem."
"Got a
flashlight?"
"Yeah. I'll be fine." I started down the trail and as soon
as I entered the woods, it became very dark. Even though the sun had not gone
down, it was so low on the horizon that the trees blocked its light. I had gone
about a hundred yards down the trail when I saw a light ahead. As I drew near
it, I could see the two boys, arm-in-arm coming up the trail. I finally
acknowledged a feeling, an emotion I had felt several times earlier in the day.
I was jealous! "You really have something to deal with, Aaron," I said to
myself, "and damn soon".
As I drew near the two, I felt relief and shame
because they were not walking arm-in-arm. Edward had an arm around Andreas'
shoulders, using him as a crutch, favoring his left foot. "What's the problem
guys?"
"I stepped on a loose rock. It rolled and I turned an ankle about
three-quarters of a mile back. Man, I couldn't have made it without
Andreas."
"I got worried," I said, "and decided to see if I could find
you. Here, Edward, let me and Andreas pack you to Eagle's Nest. "Andreas and I
formed a pack saddle with our arms, bent forward and Edward sat down. We lifted
him and walked as quickly as possible to where Jerry and Susan were
waiting.
"What happened? Edward have one of his lazy attacks?" Jerry
asked.
"Yeah, I guess he decided there was no way he was going to get
away with it otherwise, so he turned an ankle," Andreas answered.
"How
bad is it, Bro?" Jerry asked.
"Pretty sure it is only a sprain, but it
hurts like hell. Got an ace bandage in your backpack?"
"Sure." Jerry took
out the Ace and bound Edward's ankle. "That'll hold you 'til we get
home."
"We're not going yet are we? Look, the sunset is going to be
awesome," Edward said.
The sun was almost touching the horizon and it was
easy to see a spectacular sunset was already started. "Think you can stand an
hour more, Sport?" his brother asked.
"Sure. Wouldn't miss the show,"
Edward answered.
Jerry took from his backpack the two water bottles which
had been frozen, and handed them to Edward. "These will help," he said, as he
poured the water and what little ice was left into a plastic bag, making an ice
pack.
The sunset did not disappoint us and it was quite dark when we
started down the path to where the Jeep waited about a quarter-mile away. Edward
was clearly in pain, but didn't complain. When we reached the house, Mrs.
Coghill had Edward ice his ankle and as soon as that was underway, she started
serving up a great country supper.
After supper, we cleaned up for Mrs.
Coghill and were all ready to turn in after a day hiking. I was half-asleep when
Andreas said, "Thanks, Aaron. Thanks very much."
"For what,
Andreas?"
"For bringing me up here, for letting me get to know your
friends, for showing me just how beautiful the world is and can be. For letting
me know you are there when I need you. For giving me a day with
Edward."
"Thank you, Andreas, for making me aware of... I'm not sure of
what except of being alive, of seeing and wanting to see, really see... Just
thanks, Andreas. Thanks. I guess it was good being with someone your own age. I
know you must miss that."
"Come off it, Aaron. I'll be nineteen shortly
and you are what? 40?"
"Not quite that ancient. I'm
twenty-two."
"No! Really? Three whole years older! I was six and you were
nine. You were twelve and I was nine. You were sixteen and I was only thirteen.
You were..." Andreas couldn't go on because we both were laughing so hard. When
he got calmed down he said, "No, it was not about being with someone my own age
-- he's older too, you know -- it was justt good to be with someone like myself
who is essentially carefree. I mean he has to worry about grades in college, and
I do in high school, but that's it. I don't have to worry about anything. Well,
maybe whether or not I get to play basketball again, but we don't have to worry
about things you and Jerry have to worry about -- work, getting shot, those
kinds of things. Well, I do worry about that sometimes, your getting shot, I
mean."
"Nothing to worry about, Andreas, I don't plan on getting
shot."
"You do and I'll kill you," he laughed.
Sunday Mrs. Coghill
went to church and left the five of us to fend for ourselves, which we did very
nicely. She had just walked in when the rest of the Coghill clan came in and all
of them pitched in finishing Sunday dinner.
After dinner, the grownups
gathered on the deck overlooking a stream behind the house where the youngsters
were playing. "Andreas, how about joining the kids? This bunch of adults are
getting b-o-r boring," Edward said. The two young men were soon in the creek
with the kids.
It was about 3:30 when we were all packed, said our
goodbyes and headed back toward Atlanta. "What a great weekend! It was
fantastic," Andreas said. "And now it's back to school."
"And next
weekend?"
"It's really late this year, but it's prom
weekend."
"You going?"
"I paid my prom dues, but I guess not. I'd
have to rent a tux and all that stuff."
"Don't have a
date?"
"Nope, I'm gay, remember?"
"So?"
"So it wouldn't be
fair."
"Why not? You take a girl to the prom, you have a good time, you
show her a good time. Take her home, give her a goodnight kiss. You don't have
to fuck her for heaven's sake."
"I don't know. I wouldn't feel
right."
"Because you are making too big a deal of it. Go stag if you
don't want a date. Of course, I suspect there are few women available this late
in the game, but a girl who hasn't been asked would tell her grand kids about
you. Give it some thought."
When we got home we put things away, had
leftovers from Sunday dinner Mrs. Coghill sent home with us, and both got a
shower and crawled into bed.
Sometime in the night I woke to hear soft
sobs from Andreas' bed. I got up, walked to his bed and sat on the edge.
"Andreas, you awake? Bad dream? What's wrong?"
Andreas sat up in bed,
wrapped his arms around my neck and really started sobbing. I didn't know what
was wrong so I just held him close. When he regained control, he looked up at me
and said, "Aaron, he was beating me again".
"A bad dream, Andreas, just a
bad dream. He will never touch you again. I promise he will never hurt you
again." I held him until he relaxed and went to sleep. I eased him into the bed
and stood for the longest time looking at him, wondering what I could do to make
his life easier, and I did not come up with an answer.
Monday Ralph came
by for me, and I let Andreas drive the Jeep to school since he had an
appointment for a follow-up exam at 1:00. I knew he was anxious about it, but he
didn't want me to go with him even though I told him I thought I should be
there.
"Man, you sure are uptight today," Ralph said as soon as I was in
the car. I didn't even have time to say "good morning".
"You got that
right."
"Today's the big day for Andreas. Surprised you're not with
him."
"He didn't want me to go with him. I let him take the Jeep. His
appointment -- I guess that's appointments -- start at one."
"That what
he told you? And you believed him? Man, you have a lot to learn about raising
teenagers."
"That's another thing he got on me about this weekend. He
reminded me I wasn't that much older than he is. He's a teenager for only a bit
over a year then he hits the roaring twenties". Time dragged terribly. Ralph and
I stopped for lunch at noon and when we got back in the car, we had to do a run
out to the airport to pick up a package. It was some special stuff really needed
by the lab downtown. The plane was late so it was after two when we got the
package, and almost three when we got back downtown. When we got back in the
car, he drove as if he knew where he was going. "Where are we headed?" I
asked.
"Where do you suspect? We're headed for Grady." Ralph picked up
the car mike and said, "Mattie, Ralph. Aaron and I are headed to Grady to check
out something in case you need us." When we reached Grady, there was a police
cruiser parked in the tow away zone. Ralph walked up to the car and spoke to the
officer in the driver seat. As he walked back to the car, the cruiser left. "You
have to have a few years service before Grady provides free parking," he said as
he pulled into the space just vacated by the cruiser.
When we reached the
information desk, Ralph walked up to the elderly pink lady sitting behind the
desk and said, "Honey, we're supposed to be accompanying Andreas Jackson who is
here for tests. Can you locate him?"
"It might take a minute. He's not a
patient, right?"
"Right. He's just here for tests."
The pink lady
dialed a couple of numbers and after the second one said, "He's in the
outpatient waiting room. Do you know your way?"
"Yes, I do. Thank you,
Honey."
"Laying it on a little thick, ain't you, Dude?"
"Dude, I
learned one way to keep pink ladies and waitresses at Waffle House from calling
you Honey is to call them Honey first. Here we are."
Andreas was sitting
in the waiting room, a notebook on his lap, his head in a book. "How you be
doin', Dude," Ralph asked.
Andreas looked up and a huge smile spread
across his face. "Hey, Old Dude, I knew you'd come. Thanks."
"Yeah,
Couldn't keep Aaron away. What's 'appin'?"
"Looks like nothin' 'appin'.
Well, actually, they have taken my blood, my piss, and punched and probed. They
did an ultrasound and a CAT scan, and I am waiting to have an MRI made and then
I can go. It will be a week before I learn anything."
"Hurry up and
wait... Yeah, I know that routine," Ralph said.
"Guess you need to be out
catching doers of dark deeds," Andreas smiled.
"Nah, we placed them all
on hold while we checked on you."
We stayed with Andreas until they came
and got him for his MRI. I don't know what took so long, but it was after four
when he came back. "I'm done for the day," he announced. "Want a ride, Roomy?"
he asked with a great Andreas smile.
"See you in the morning, partner,"
Ralph said as we walked out of Grady. Andreas and I walked to the parking lot
and picked up the Jeep. He drove.
I could tell Andreas was uptight and I
wasn't sure if it was because of what he had gone through today, or remembering
what had happened, or worry about what might happen. "Worried, Tiger?" I
asked.
"Yeah, a little bit. There seemed to be an awful lot of tests and
things today, like they were looking for something and couldn't find it. I don't
know whether I have lost something or what."
"Know it won't do any good
to tell you not to worry. I do. But you're in good hands."
"Yeah, I
know." As Andreas spoke, the phone rang. He was sitting near it and picked it
up. "Aaron's and Andreas' place, this is Andreas... Oh, hello Ms. Helms. How you
doin'?... Yeah, I spent the day at your place... No, don't know anything yet...
Yeah, the man's here. Aaron, Ms. Helms."
"LaTonya, what's
'appin'?"
"How'd you like to do a repeat of the prom,
Aaron?"
"What do you mean?"
"Ms. Allen called me today and asked
if I could chaperone for the prom. I asked if I could bring a date and she asked
if DeWayne was in town. I told her no, but I thought I might round up an old
prom date. Interested, or do you think it would put a crimp in Andreas'
style?"
"He says he's not going. Got any spare maidens he might
escort?"
"As a matter of fact, I do. My next door neighbor's daughter is
in the same fix I was in. She thinks she's engaged to a sailor who is under the
ocean somewhere. I'm sure she'd like to go, but thinks most men might get the
wrong idea. Probably be an early night for Andreas since she only wants to go to
the prom."
"Does she bark?" I asked.
"No, you fool, she's actually
very good-looking. Let me talk to Andreas. I know he knows
her."
"Andreas, I have a matchmaker on the phone. She'd like to talk to
you."
"Andreas, Ms. Helms... No, I hadn't planned on going... I guess I
could. I just don't have a lot of money to spend... Aaron, she wants to speak to
you."
"Yeah, what's up?"
"Andreas is concerned about the money, I
think. Can you handle two proms?"
"If you two don't expect the limo
treatment, sure."
"Put Andreas back on."
Andreas listened for a
while and finally said, "Sure, I know she's pretty and a lot of fun... Well, if
it will help you out, I'll go. Aaron."
"Take it you talked him into
it."
"Sure did. You'll be proud of him, Aaron, because he cleans up nice
and so does she. I'll be wearing pale yellow and I think she will be in
streetwalker red. Talk to you later."
"You know, I think we were just
walked into a trap," I said as I hung up the phone.
"Yeah, well, if I
have to show up at the prom with a female date, LaLisa is the one. She is one
good-looking woman -- not that that turns me on, but I do appreciate a thing of
beauty. And, hey, you didn't do so bad yourself."
Tuesday after I got
off, Andreas and I made arrangements for tux -- very classical and conservative.
While we were at the mall, we ordered flowers for the girls and when we got back
home, I made dinner reservations at the Peasant Uptown, a place I loved when I
could scrape together enough.
"Guess they will just have to go in a Jeep
because I am not springing for a limo," I said.
"Better than a police
escort," Andreas laughed.
"Better keep this a secret or Ralph may show up
with a police escort," I laughed in turn.
The rest of the week was very
busy as Ralph and I got assigned to a series of burglaries on the Northside.
Man, those people must have piles of money or very good credit. The burglar used
the same MO so we were pretty sure it was one person or the same persons. The
stuff taken would not be showing up in pawn shops. All of it was art, mostly
paintings, but some small sculptures. One man was devastated because the burglar
had taken four paintings and left three in the library. The burglar was helpful
in one way. He turned on the computer and left a scrolling message, "I never
touch forgeries. It is dishonest."
The insurance company decided to have
the paintings checked and they were forgeries. It was doubly funny because the
originals had been widely reported as part of a European art theft so the guy
who bought them knew he was -- at least he thought he was -- purchasing stolen
goods. Money doesn't make people honest or change the nature of their crimes,
their crimes just involve more money.
Mid-week I made appointments for
Andreas and myself to get our hair worked on -- Friday after work. One of my
classmates had earned his barber's license when he was sixteen and worked Friday
night through Saturday in a College Park barbershop. He was flat out good and
had earned enough to get his own apartment and go to Georgia State when he
graduated from high school. Now he arranged his class schedule to allow him to
work Friday and Saturday and one other day in the week. He had a huge customer
base so he was doing well.
As a police officer, I probably should have
just shaved my head like most of the black officers, but I didn't. I kept a
"high and tight" cut. Andreas was one of those rare dark-skinned people who had
what is known in the black community as "good hair". It was plentiful, very soft
and curly, not kinky. His hair was beautiful so he wore it in what I guess was a
standard cut for whites, but rare for African-Americans.
Ralph dropped me
off at the apartment. When I got upstairs, Andreas was having a Coke and
watching something on TV, I think one of those "I beat her ass because she be
fucking my baby daddy" shows. When I came in he turned and asked, "Where do they
get these people? They are advertising for women who had a baby by their father
or brother. Those people are crazy."
"Not too crazy to get on TV and make
a fool of themselves," I answered. "Talk about being a disgrace to your race,
they are a disgrace to the whole human race. Ready to go get
beautified?"
After we had finished at the barber shop, we went by a rib
place and ate ribs for supper. "I like ribs, but I wonder if the meat is worth
the battle," Andreas said.
"No question in my mind about that," I said,
wiping the sauce from my face.
On the way home, we picked up our tux.
Both fit like they were tailor-made. "If I keep going to proms, I need to buy
one of these," I said.
I had the flowers delivered to the apartment since
delivery was free and saved me a trip. By seven Andreas and I were ready. He was
one handsome guy -- tall, well-built, beautiful rich milk chocolate skin and a
smile that would stop a train. "God, you are good-looking," I said as we stood
side-by-side, checking everything in a mirror.
"Not such a bad-looking
brother yourself," he said and smiled.
I don't know why I didn't think
about the drive, but we had to go to College Park, pick up our dates, then drive
all the way across Atlanta for dinner, but the food was worth it, we all agreed.
Although the prom started at 8:00, from experience I knew nothing would happen
until close to 9:00. The senior walk was at 10:30. At least half the juniors and
seniors would show up for the walk and leave soon afterward, having more
interesting things to do in the hotel rooms their parents rented for them. Since
the prom was being held at the Peachtree Center hotel, we had a relatively short
drive after dinner and arrived at 8:30. The band was just getting started and
the couples present seemed reluctant to dance. LaTonya and I weren't and as soon
as we started dancing, Andreas and LaLisa joined us.
LaTonya and I danced
some, nibbled on the food and visited with teachers. I had seen some of them
when I went to the conference for Andreas, some I had not seen since graduation.
Ms. Boynton, head of the science-math magnet program, said, "I don't like to
talk shop at a party, but you need to speak to Andreas about next year. Georgia
Tech and Georgia State are both putting pressure on me to have him make up his
mind."
"And Emory?"
"I suspect Emory know they don't stand a
chance since they are not a basketball powerhouse," she smiled. With Georgia
Tech being a nationally known basketball school and Georgia State rising in the
ranks, Emory's basketball program was a joke since even basketball players were
expected to make the grades to stay in without selected courses, tutors, all
that goes with getting basketball players regardless of academics.
"I
wouldn't count Emory out, especially if the other two have to have an answer
right away. He is more relaxed than he has been for a while. He had a through
going over Monday and hasn't gotten the results yet. That may answer the
basketball question with a big 'NO!' but nothing's sure right now. He would
definitely pick Emory, all things being equal, because he really wants to go to
med school there."
"Well, his options will be closing soon, regardless of
what he decides."
"Thanks for the warning. He's supposed to get the
results of his tests Monday. I'll talk to him then."
At midnight the band
played the last dance and we left. When we were in the Jeep, I asked, "Anyone up
for food or drink?".
"After the food and drink at the prom?" LaLisa
asked. "Last year at the junior-senior the food was scarce and bad. I heard the
juniors saying that would not happen this year. There really was no need for
going out to dinner before but, don't get me wrong, I really enjoyed it.
Andreas, thanks so much for inviting me. I really wanted to go, but would not
have gone without a date. You are a gentleman and a scholar," she laughed, then
said, "Hey, never thought about it, but that's really true in your
case".
We took LaLisa home first. Andreas walked her to the door, took
her key and opened the door, kissed her on the cheek and came back toward the
Jeep when she went inside. As he approached, LaTonya said, "Someone commented on
the lack of social graces among the athletes at the Christmas dance and noted
Andreas was an exception, and he sure is. I wonder why?"
"I doubt that it
was from home training," I said. "Or maybe it was from his mom. I did notice he
was reading a book on manners right after he agreed to go to the prom. He takes
everything seriously, I think, even having fun!"
"He's a great fellow,
but you know that don't you?"
"Yeah, I do." I wasn't sure what LaTonya
meant by her remark and kept my response very general.
Andreas was
unusually quiet as we rode home after dropping LaTonya off, so much so that I
noticed it right away. I wasn't sure where his thoughts were, so I didn't
disturb him.
As we walked upstairs, I asked, "Did you have a good time,
Andreas?".
"I had a wonderful time," he said as I unlocked the door. "It
was almost perfect."
"Oh, only almost perfect?" I asked as I turned on
the living room lamp. "And just what would have made it perfect?" Andreas
suddenly looked down and blushed. "Yes?"
"I... Nothin', Nothin', Aaron,"
Andreas answered.
"Ahh, come on. You turn down a chance for a perfect
evening. May never have another chance."
Andreas was standing just inside
the door, and when I spoke he looked down, digging at the carpet with the toe of
his shoe -- the exact picture of a nine-year-old asking his first girlfriend for
a kiss. He blushed and looked up, half-smiling, half-hesitant. "I'm afraid,
Aaron. Just forget it."
"What horrible thing is it you need to make your
evening perfect?"
"Not horrible for me. Maybe for you."
"Give me a
chance to be horrified," I said. "What would make this a perfect evening,
Andreas?"
The young man looked at me, again acting like an embarrassed
nine-year-old. He finally looked up, a shy smile on his face. I had to listen
hard to hear his soft response. "A dance with you."
"Whoa," I said to
myself. "What have I let myself in for?" I knew I had thoughts about Andreas --
nothing definite, just a feeling, a questioning. Here he was asking me to dance
with him and I knew his request implied more than just friendship. I mean it had
to, right? I was confused, frightened, unsure of myself, of my world. Wouldn't a
dance with him indicate a kind of feeling and commitment I wasn't sure I had or
could give. Finally I had to respond so I asked, "A dance with me would make
your evening perfect?". I asked as though I had not heard
correctly.
"Yeah, but if you don't want to, I understand. I mean I'm gay
and all. And I can understand if you don't want to and all. Me being gay and
all."
We could straighten out what I did and didn't feel later, and I did
mean later. This was important to a kid who was on his way back from hell. "Put
on a CD, Andreas," I said as I slid open the glass door to the balcony, the only
place beside our tiny kitchen that wasn't carpeted. The balcony wasn't huge, but
it was big enough for a dance.
The CD started and Andreas walked out onto
the balcony and took my hand, and pulled me into his embrace as a real oldie
started:
Are the stars out tonight
I don't know if it's cloudy or bright
'Cause I only have eyes for you, dear
The moon may be high
But I can't see a
thing in the sky
'Cause I only have eyes for
you
I don't know if we're in a garden
Or on a crowded avenue
You are here, so
am I
Maybe millions of people go by
But they all disappear from view
'Cause I only
have eyes for you
I was confused, bewildered. Andreas was holding me
close as he started singing with the CD. He had to know the effect he was having
on me. In fact, it might be clearer to him than to me. I was aroused, more than
I could ever remember being aroused. Andreas could not help feeling my hard cock
between us. And what really bothered me was I felt like I was where I was
supposed to be -- in Andreas' arms, dancing to a love song in a warm spring
night. He said a dance with me would make the night perfect, well I hadn't
expected the night to be special, just a bit out of the ordinary. Now he was
making the night perfect for me. My mind was a whirl, my thoughts all over the
map. Was I gay? Was I in love with Andreas? What would it mean if I were --
either gay or in love with Andreas? Could I be in love with him without being
gay? Was I taking advantage of him?
If I thought I was confused while we
were dancing, my world came to pieces and became whole at the same time when, as
the song ended, Andreas put his hand under my chin, tilting it up, smiled and
placed his lips against mine in a deep, passionate kiss. His tongue invaded my
mouth, bringing with it a taste, the taste of Andreas. I literally dissolved in
his arms. My legs became weak, my knees collapsed and, as I started to fall,
Andreas swept me into his arms and carried me into the living room. There he
placed me on the sofa and stood, looking down at me, a smile starting then being
wiped away by worry. He finally sat down beside me and said, "I'm sorry, Aaron.
I really am. No, I'm not. I'm not sorry I let you know I'm in love with you, but
I am sorry I upset you. Forgive me. Please?"
I couldn't speak. I was too
confused. I reached up and took Andreas' hand and pulled him down beside me. I
looked at him and, for reasons I couldn't understand, huge tears started running
down my face. As soon as he saw them, Andreas slid off the sofa and lay on the
floor in fetal position and started sobbing in great, heart-breaking sobs. "Oh,
God, Aaron, please forgive me. I didn't mean to hurt you. Now I have destroyed
everything."
I didn't know what to say or do and wasn't sure I could say
or do anything. Finally I could stand it no longer and slid off the sofa and
gathered Andreas in my arms. When I was able to speak, I said, "Andreas, you
have destroyed nothing. I'm not sure what you have done. I am confused, but you
have destroyed nothing. I'm not sure what has happened, but I am not sorry that
you asked me to dance with you. I do know it felt right and wonderful. But I
need time to work through a lot of things, a lot of feelings. Can you give me
that? Please?"
"Aaron, I am sure of one thing and maybe only one thing. I
love you. I knew it the weekend we were in north Georgia. When Edward and I left
the three of you, we were having a great time talking, asking each other
questions. I don't know why, but he asked me if I was gay and I told him I was.
I expected him to tell me to get lost -- and I would have been had he left me,"
Andreas smiled. "He asked me if we were boyfriends and I told him we were not,
but that I had fallen in love with you. He asked me some very pointed questions.
He wanted to know if I was in love or just grateful for your having taken me in.
He really pushed at me to make sure I was in love and not just lusting after
your body -- I told him I was, but there was more than lust. More than
infatuation, I also assured him. He asked when I was going to tell you and I
told him I was afraid I would run you off. He was the reason I wanted to make
sure you realized you were not a great deal older than I was. All that sort of
thing. I had felt I was in love with you before, but after that afternoon with
Edward, I was sure."
"Maybe I need to spend an afternoon with Edward," I
smiled. "Obviously you can get me hot and horny, but I would never base a
relationship on that. In fact, it would destroy any relationship we had. I can't
sort out my feelings right now. I'm not sure I am gay. I mean I had a girlfriend
that I loved, I really did love her, but... I'm confused,
Andreas."
"That's ok and you can have all the space and time you need to
sort things out. Just don't feel pity for me and pretend you love me. I'll wait
until you can honestly say you do or do not love me."
"Andreas, I'll
never lie to you. There is no question that I love you. Never doubt that. The
only question, the only one, is the nature of that love." I got up from the
floor, extended a hand and pulled Andreas to his feet. When I did, I embraced
him in a bear hug and said, "Andreas, I thought I was the older guy and you are
the one who is supposed to be confused."
"Yeah, well, I guess we are just
different."
It was nearly two in the morning when we got to bed. Andreas
was snoring softly soon after he crawled under the covers. I lay awake, playing
the night's events over and over in my mind. I was still questioning them and
myself when I finally went to sleep.
I was very sound asleep when I was
awakened by a bloodcurdling scream. I shot straight up in bed, confused and
disoriented. When I got my bearings, I realized where I was and that Andreas had
screamed. About the time I was fully awake, Andreas screamed again. He had
rolled himself in a tight ball in the middle of his bed. I went to him and shook
him to wake him. When he was half-awake, he put his arms around my neck,
squeezing me very tight as he started sobbing. I held him close until he
regained control, then asked what was wrong.
"I had a nightmare again,
Aaron. I dreamed I told Mom and Kumba I was in love with you and Mom started
beating me and Kumba strapped on his gun and went looking for you. It was
horrible."
"It was only a dream, Andreas. You are safe here and I am
here. It's ok. Go back to sleep now."
"Can I sleep with you?
Please?"
"Oh, boy," I thought. "How can I say no and how can I sleep with
Andreas in bed with me?" I guess I was about to find out. "Sure."
I went
back to bed and Andreas climbed in beside me, spooning himself into my back. As
he had felt in my arms dancing, so in my bed. It seemed so right, so where he
should be.
We slept late Sunday, finally crawling out of bed in the early
afternoon. No mention was made by either of us of the events of last night.
There was, it seemed to me, a feeling of intimacy in just being together, but it
could have been my imagination.
Monday, Andreas was off to school and I
drove to the station. Ralph greeted me with, "The Superintendent wants to see
the two of us. I was told it is some hush-hush project."
When we got to
the big man's office, he told us to close the door and take a seat. Before we
sat down, he introduced us to Chief Haynes of the Macon Police Department.
"Chief Haynes, I'll let you explain what's going on."
"You, of course,
know that I-75 runs from Florida north and is the main route for drug
distribution from the Florida ports. Macon is a kind of hub for drugs intended
for Atlanta, Savannah and Columbus, as well as Macon. The distributors and
dealers in Macon are very clever. Macon is small enough that most everyone knows
everyone. It's hard for our boys to do anything because they are known. What we
want to do is have someone from the outside go underground and see what they can
find out. In looking over files, the Superintendent and I were impressed with
your record, Johnson. What had special appeal was the fact that Detective Hicks
had recommended you in the most impressive way. He asked for you as his partner.
I'm convinced the right person could get the information we need in short time
-- a month, six weeks max."
"Johnsoon, I suppose I could order you to take
the job, but I won't. It's dangerous, and the type of police work that requires
the willingness of the person undertaking it. If you accept the task, you'll die
in a way not yet determined. In accordance with your wishes, there will be a
small private funeral and your ashes scattered somewhere. There will be a big
write-up here and in Macon. We'll have to work that out. You will be given a new
identity as an ex-con. You will be released on a parole and have to report to
your parole officer weekly. He will be your contact. There will be no other
contacts. I won't kid you, the job is dangerous. We have lost two officers
already to the dealers, at least we think they are responsible. Since you have
no family, that problem is eliminated."
"I do have a young man I took in
who is my unofficial ward. What will be done about him?"
"I didn't know
this. What's the situation?"
I decided if these men were going to be my
lifeline, they better be able to handle Andreas' situation, so I told them why
he came to live with me. They promised they would keep an eye out for him and
told Ralph he could consider checking on Andreas as part of his job. "I'll also
look into Kumba Richardson's file, but I will do nothing until you're
resurrected," the Superintendent said. "Can't have him snooping around trying to
find out where I got my information. Think about the task and let me know in the
next day or so. If you decide to take it on, there will be some pretty intense
training as well as work creating your new identity. I'd like to have a man on
the streets of Macon by next weekend."
"I wouldn't have hesitated a few
months ago, but now that I am responsible for Andreas, I'm not sure. He will
have to know I am not dead. Given his emotional state now I would not subject
him to believing I am dead."
"Do you think he can convince everyone he
DOES believe it? I don't! If he knew, I am much afraid it will put you in
greater danger," the Chief declared.
"Leave Andreas to me," Ralph said.
"If it becomes absolutely necessary, I will tell him, otherwise his distress is
your life insurance, Aaron."
"I'll have your answer as soon as I can," I
said.
When we got in the car, Ralph said, "Aaron, this is a very
dangerous assignment you are being asked to do, but it could make a real
difference in the drug trafficking here, and that's why you became a policeman,
right?"
"Right, Of course, right. But now? Now I have Andreas to
consider. And even that situation is different than it was a week ago. And he
graduates in a few weeks. I might miss that."
"We're in a job that does
require sacrifices. I'll make sure there is a full video of the event if you
aren't here for graduation if you accept the assignment. But what's this about
the situation with Andreas changing?"
I had told Ralph nothing about prom
weekend beyond the fact that we both had gone and had a good time. "I guess it's
now or never," I thought to myself, took a deep breath and told Ralph
everything.
"Yeah, the situation is different all right. And you two
haven't talked since, I mean about Andreas' confession of love?"
"No, I
don't know what to say and I guess Andreas is just waiting for me to say
something."
"What are you afraid of?" Ralph asked. "I guess you are not
100% gay. Few are, just as there are few 100% heteros. But, Aaron, LaTonya, Ms.
Allen and I have all hinted at what we see and that is you are more on the gay
side of the equation than the straight side. I think you know that as well, just
haven't admitted it to yourself."
"I know I am confused and I guess I am
beginning to admit that I am gay. I know one thing, Ralph, I am falling in love
with Andreas, but he's so young."
"Yeah, when you retire at sixty-five he
will be only sixty-two and have to take an early retirement and wait three years
for medicare!" Ralph laughed. "Right now we need to be talking about how we are
going to deal with Andreas if you decide to take the assignment. I'm worried
that if he knows you are ok in Macon, he won't be able to hide the fact, or at
least won't be able to convince anyone he's devastated by your death, and anyone
who knows him will know something is wrong. I know something about what's going
on there because I got called in to be asked about you. Aaron, I am convinced
when this situation blows, there will be a lot of surprises. Right now I
wouldn't trust anyone knowing you are not dead if you take the assignment. Not
even Andreas. He might make an innocent slip and get you killed."
"You
are right, of course, but at the same time, I can't put him through weeks and
months of grieving for me, and he would."
"Certainly true after what you
told me about last weekend." We talked over the next two days as we were going
about pretty routine matters. I, of course, had said nothing to Andreas. Life
had settled back into pretty much the routine it had been in before the prom.
Well, not exactly. There was a lot more touching going on, arms around shoulders
when it seemed natural. It was increasingly obvious to me that I might not be
100% gay, but I was close to 100% in love with Andreas. That was why it was
getting harder all the time for me to do what I did Thursday. Ralph and I went
downtown to headquarters as soon as he picked me up. We went to the big man's
office and I told him I'd take the assignment. I guess the idea that I might --
God knows how -- lose Andreas to drugs did it. I had never done anything as hard
in my life as saying yes to the assignment.
"Great. I was afraid you
wouldn't and I didn't have anyone else as good for the job." We then discussed
how it would be handled. I wasn't happy about it, but it was a very good
plan.
Thursday, at noon, I got a call on my cell phone -- not the police
radio -- from the superintendent. "Take your car to Perimeter Mall and drive
behind the Firestone place. You'll find my car there. Take it and leave yours.
The show is hitting the road." At 1:00 we got a call to join in a high-speed
chase on I-20 west. It was strange because we saw no other police cars on the
way out. Somewhere between Atlanta and Douglasville, we saw two cars burning --
very strange. When we arrived, the superintendent and Macon's police chief were
the only people present. "How did you guys get here?" Ralph asked as we reach
the scene.
"In the two cars," the superintendent answered, pointing to
the burning police and other car. "We finally have our bodies." The plan called
for a high-speed chase of a "felon" by "Aaron", a chase which ended in a fiery
crash. The two cars were to burst into flame, burning the two beyond
recognition. The burned bodies would be cremated and the ashes of "Aaron" would
be scattered in north Georgia at his request. "Aaron, as of a few minutes ago,
is no more. You'll be taken off the payroll as deceased and all the proper
papers filed -- death certificate, everything. Even start payments on your
insurance."
"Superintendent, I haven't changed my beneficiary. I would
have changed it to Andreas if I had remembered.
"Aaron, unless this takes
over six months, you don't have to worry. It takes ages for insurance to get
straightened out -- after the request leaves my desk."
I hated the plan,
but knew it was the best possible way to get rid of "Aaron". Fortunately, Ralph
was the one who would have to comfort Andreas, Jerry, and anyone else who might
care.
When the fire department arrived, the superintendent had me in his
car along with the Macon chief. When the fire department -- it was from
Douglasville to make sure no-one recognized me -- started putting out the fire,
the superintendent left with the three of us in his car. We drove to a secluded
spot where the Macon chief's car had been hidden. I got out and before I left
said, "Ralph, take care of Andreas and let him know I love him." I looked back
as we left, wondering when, or even if, I'd see my friends and Andreas again. It
was a sobering thought.
Chapter 5
Ralph
As
the superintendent and I drove back into the city, I found myself on the verge
of tears. I was the one who would have to tell Andreas the news, the terrible
news, that Aaron was dead. "Ralph, I don't envy you your job, but anyone else
talking to the young man would appear strange. The bodies will be taken to the
Medical Examiner's as soon as possible, and he has arranged to have his staff
attend an in-service until 5:00. He will personally get the bodies to the
crematory. The ashes will be available Friday afternoon. The two bodies were two
the county would have to bury, so there will be no questions. One's ashes will
not be returned from the crematory. The other's ashes, the ones you receive,
will be taken to the mountains and scattered. You made sure Aaron left specific
instructions about that?" I nodded. "I am hoping he will luck up and break this
case soon."
"When can I tell Andreas that Aaron is not
dead?"
"Only Aaron can do that. I am not kidding, Ralph, he is going into
real danger and I don't want to make it more dangerous than it
is."
"Superintendent, I hope there is something in all this for Aaron. He
took this case because, as you know, he has suffered greatly because of drugs,
but I think there was another reason. A week ago, Andreas told Aaron he was in
love with him. Those of us who know Aaron well know he is bisexual if not just
gay, but Aaron doesn't know that or admit it. The fact that in high school he
dated the same girl for two years and they seldom had sex should say something
to him, but he just says he is confused. This assignment will give him time away
from all he knows, time to think and sort things out."
"That could be
dangerous. He needs his mind on his work."
"I'm betting money that it
will make him very careful concerning his neck, and a tiger on the job. At one
point in his life, everyone he had cared about was dead from drugs. He sure
doesn't want that to happen again."
"I hope you are right."
"I am.
Now I have to come up with a reason why Aaron is dead and I am alive and without
a scratch."
"Oh, a detail I hadn't thought about. How's this? You had
gone to Douglasville to testify in court. A very unimportant case so no-one will
remember whether or not you were there. I'll check the docket and pick
one."
"I guess I can't put it off any longer."
"Let me know if
there is anything I can do. By the way, you have a brand-new car. It's waiting
for you."
"Thanks, I guess."
I went down and found my car waiting.
Somehow or other it didn't seem right. As I was driving -- taking my time -- to
Aaron's place, I got a call on the radio from the superintendent. "Ralph, I have
just learned of your partner's death this afternoon. I'm sorry. Call on me if I
can be of help. You're lucky you weren't with him or you'd be burned to death as
well. Even though you didn't get called to testify, going to Douglasville was
lucky for you."
"I guess I should feel lucky, but I don't."
"The
reporters are here now. I'll try to keep them away from you and Aaron's
roommate. Again, call on me if I can help."
The superintendent was not a
dunce. He knew anything he said over the radio was instant in-house
news.
When I reached Aaron's apartment, Andreas opened the door and when
he saw me asked, "Where's Aaron? What's wrong? I know something is
wrong."
"Let's go inside, Andreas."
Once inside I told Andreas
that Aaron was dead. I was prepared for his response, I thought, but when it
came, I was not. He fell on the floor, weeping quietly, saying over and over
again, "Everything I love is gone with him. I have absolutely no reason to go on
living, Ralph. Why couldn't it have been me? Why? Why did Aaron have to
die."
I lifted Andreas to his feet and held him close. "Andreas, grab
some clothes. You're going home with me."
"No, I'm staying here where I
was with Aaron."
"No, you are not. You need people around you. Get some
clothes."
Andreas argued, but finally got his things together. When he
was ready to go, I said, "Andreas, Aaron once told me if anything ever happened
to him, there was a letter in a locked box for me. Do you know where he kept it?
He seems to have forgotten to tell me."
"I think it might be on a shelf
in his closet." Andreas looked in the closet and called, "Yeah there's a small
fireproof box here. You have the combination?"
"Yeah, it's 9-9-0-8. Open
it."
Andreas opened the box and took out an envelope. "This is addressed
to you and says 'In case of my death or becoming comatose'," he said as he
handed me the envelope.
I knew what was in the envelope since I had read
it carefully after Aaron had written it. It simply said, in case of his death,
his body was to be cremated and the ashes scattered off the cliffs overlooking
the river in north Georgia -- "Jerry and Andreas know the place". The scattering
was to be private, only the Coghills, myself, Andreas were to be present. It
also said, "Tell Andreas I love him".
"Andreas, get clothes together,
we're going."
When I got the kid home, Lucy took charge. The woman had
been a wonderful wife for thirty-five years and a wonderful mother for thirty.
Andreas, in his distress, pushed all her mother buttons. Understandably, Andreas
said he wanted nothing to eat, but Lucy hovered over him, doing motherly things
for him. There was no reason she should do otherwise as she had not been told
about Aaron's assignment. She actually got him to eat a little supper and, as
soon as he had finished, took him to the guest room. "I think you need a long
hot shower," she said, "then get in your pajamas and try to
relax".
Andreas was on automatic pilot, which apparently was attuned to
Lucy's frequency. It was obvious he was just going through the motions. After a
long shower, he called me and said, "Ok if I sleep in boxers? That's what I
generally do."
"Sure. Sleep in your birthday suit if you
like."
"Don't think Lucy would appreciate that."
"You might be
surprised," I countered, and got a faint smile out of the kid.
The
superintendent had given me some sleeping pills for Andreas. "No need for him to
suffer more than he has to," he had said. "See that he gets one as soon as you
think he's needs to go to bed."
It was only 9:00 when I finally got
Andreas to take a pill and go to sleep. When I checked on him before turning in
myself, he was asleep, but his sleep was restless. When I told Lucy about
Andreas' statements about having no reason to go on living, she insisted I sleep
in the guest room with him -- in spite of the fact there was no reasonable way
he could do away with himself in there. I slept little, what with worrying about
Aaron, Andreas and being cramped in a twin bed.
When Andreas cried out at
five in the morning, I went to him and held him while he wept. Lucy had heard
him and came to the guest room with a glass of water and another sleeping pill.
He took the pill and was soon asleep again, sleeping until nearly noon.
I
was anxious to see Saturday morning's paper to see just how big a story Aaron's
"death" had been. There was almost a half-page story on the front of the "Home"
section. It was made up of several different articles. One had a picture of
Aaron in his uniform and the story of his "death". Additionally, there was a
graduation picture and story about his years at College Park, a sidebar about
his decision to enter police work because of what crack had done to him. I was
surprised. There was also a separate article about the "felon" he had been
chasing when the crash occurred. It was a story designed to be picked up by the
Macon paper, since the "felon" was supposedly from Macon.
When Andreas
got up, Lucy got him to eat something, after which he showered and dressed.
Before he got up, I had called Jerry and told him the news and of Aaron's
request that his ashes be scattered in north Georgia. Jerry asked about Andreas
and I told him he was with me. We talked a long time about Aaron and just before
I hung up he said, "You know Andreas was in love with Aaron, don't
you?".
"Yeah, Aaron told me about prom weekend."
"Did he tell you
he was in love with Andreas or hadn't he found out?"
I laughed, "You know
he would be the last to know, but I think it had dawned."
"Let me know
what the plans are. We can drive up to mom's place this afternoon or in the
morning."
"I'd like to make it as quick as possible for Andreas'
sake."
I got a call from the funeral home mid-afternoon telling me I
could pick up the ashes after 4:00. "And, Mr. Hicks, we will have a selection of
urns from which to choose," the undertaker had said.
"No need. The ashes
will go directly to the place where they are to be scattered."
Andreas
was sitting in the kitchen with Lucy. If he needed a mom right now, he had a
good one. She seemed to know just exactly what to do with our son when he was
upset, and she was working that magic on Andreas. "Andreas, you need to get
dressed for a trip to north Georgia. We can pick up the ashes at 4:00 and we
will drive directly to north Georgia. Jerry and Susan are on their way
now."
"I need to go back to the apartment. I only have these" -- he stuck
out a foot -- "and I will need my hiking shoes."
"Ok, when you are
ready."
"I'm ready right now." Andreas gave Lucy a big hug and said,
"Thanks, Lucy. You don't know how much I appreciate what you have done for
me."
"Think nothing of it and I expect to see you around here often," she
said, returning his hug.
There was silence in the car as we drove to the
apartment. Andreas disappeared into the bedroom and reappeared dressed for a
hike.
While we were there the phone rang. It was the superintendent.
"Ralph, I got to thinking: after all the build-up, we were letting this funeral
take too much of a backseat. The director himself has raked me over the coals
about that -- by the way, he doesn't know. He insists on his car taking you and
the boy to north Georgia with police escort. Additionally, each time you cross a
county line, the sheriff will have deputies ready to escort you to the next
county. It will make good copy for the news."
I told Andreas about the
escort. I didn't know what he'd think about it, but he said he thought Aaron
deserved at least that.
The chief's car came for us at 4:00 and we went
to the funeral home, picked up the small black plastic box with "cremains", and
headed for north Georgia. The chief's driver had said he would drive as slowly
as we wanted, "out of respect".
"I don't think Aaron would approve of us
holding up traffic," Andreas said. "Let's go to north Georgia." Whereupon the
blue lights came on and the sirens started, a Fulton County deputy leading. We
were driving at maximum safe speed. When we reached Fannin County, the sirens
were turned off and we proceeded with a bit more decorum to the Coghills',
arriving at 6:30 -- a new speed record, I suspect.
Mrs. Coghill met the
car and immediately took Andreas in her arms, hugging him close. We walked
inside where Mrs. Coghill had a huge supper waiting. When Andreas said he wasn't
hungry, Mrs. Coghill said she wasn't surprised, but everyone was expecting him
for supper. "You need to be strong, Andreas."
The psychology worked.
Andreas sat down and when Mrs. Coghill had served his plate, he started picking
at his food as the Coghills started telling tales on Aaron. There was a lot of
laughter as friends remembered him. I wished I had a tape for Aaron. He would
have had a blast with it. Andreas was probably not aware of it, but he was
eating, putting away a lot of food.
When everyone had finished supper,
Mrs. Coghill told everyone to go to the deck, "The evening is nice. I'll bring
coffee and dessert."
The mood became very solemn once we were outside. I
noticed Andreas had separated himself from the group as a whole. He refused
coffee and dessert when Mrs. Coghill offered it to him. We had been outside for
a short time when I heard a car drive up. Shortly afterward, a young man walked
onto the deck. Andreas turned and when he saw the young man, he got up and ran
to him, saying, "Edward, Edward, he's dead". Edward took Andreas in his arms and
the two wept. Finally, Edward took Andreas' hand and led him down the steps. I
saw them as they walked along the bank of the stream running behind the
Coghills' house.
I didn't know when Andreas came back. Mrs. Coghill had
shown me to a room about 8:00 and I was in bed shortly afterward, exhausted from
the past two days. I'm not a very religious man, but I sure sent a few up on
behalf of Aaron and Andreas. I had been told by Andreas we would be leaving the
house at 4:30, because he wanted to scatter the ashes at sunrise.
Four
came very early and I was half-asleep as we walked in silence through the forest
where there was just enough light for us to make our way to the cliffs
overlooking the river. Andreas stood at the edge of the cliff, holding the box
with the ashes. Edward was standing beside, his arm over Andreas' shoulders. As
the sun rose above the horizon, Andreas opened the box and scattered the ashes
over the cliff's edge. The light from the rising sun caught the falling ashes,
turning them into a stream of red and gold. "You are missing a grand funeral,
Aaron," I thought.
When we returned to the house, Mrs. Coghill finished a
grand breakfast and everyone ate. After breakfast, Andreas asked if we could
wait until afternoon to go back to Atlanta. We were going back with Jerry and he
said he was in no hurry. "Edward and I are going for a hike," Andreas said.
"We'll be back before too late." It was only much later that I learned Andreas
wanted to talk about Aaron and his love for him, and he trusted Edward to listen
and to keep his secret. Andreas told me what he had wanted after I asked him if
he was falling for Edward a couple weeks later, when Edward came to Atlanta to
spend the weekend with him.
When we got back to Atlanta, I insisted
Andreas come to my place. "You don't need to be alone right now. Besides, Lucy
will kill me if I didn't bring you back so she could baby you." I insisted he
stay with us the whole following week. He only went to the apartment to pick up
what he needed. Friday morning at breakfast, Andreas said, "I have been here
long enough. I'll go home after school today. I need to get on with my life." As
he spoke, tears started running down his face. My heart cried for him.
I
checked on Andreas every day, either by driving by or phoning. Two weeks after
the "funeral", I asked Andreas if he needed anything. "Ralph, this is kinda
embarrassing, but I am out of money. I guess I should have realized my
freeloading was over but, with everything else going on, I didn't think about
it. Could I borrow some until I can find a job and earn some
money?"
"Haven't you been getting a check from the department? I know
Aaron intended to name you as beneficiary of his insurance. I'll check for you
tomorrow. Do you need money tonight?"
"No, I can get by a day or so.
Thanks, Ralph. Thanks for everything."
I went straight to the
superintendent the next morning. He saw me at once and was most apologetic about
not having taken care of getting money to Andreas. "Detective Johnson will have
our heads if that's not taken care of now. Since he is 'dead', he is no longer
on the payroll. I'm holding the paperwork on his insurance. He is really on his
own in Macon. I'll see that a weekly check goes to Andreas. In the meantime,
I'll get a couple hundred in cash to him today."
Andreas was staying at
the apartment and seemed to be handling his grief very well. Lucy insisted that
he come for dinner at least once a week. I kept in touch with Ms. Allen. She
said Andreas was obviously grieving, but not in an unhealthy way. "He's doing
his grief work very well, I think," she told me.
As I mentioned earlier,
Edward came down to spend a weekend with Andreas, and Jerry had taken him to the
Coghills' another. The next week, Andreas told me, Jerry had called and asked
about moving in with him. "He said he and Susan had a long and serious talk and,
as much as they loved each other, it was clear it would never work out. Jerry is
living for the day he can get hired as a Fannin County deputy and move back to
the mountains. Susan had just about had enough the weekend she went to the
mountains with me and Aaron. She was convinced she could never live in the
mountains after a weekend camping trip. She's a city girl and Jerry is a
mountain man. Jerry had moved in with her and let his apartment go, so he is
looking for a place to live and thought it would be a good idea for him to move
in with me. I think it is a good idea as well."
I agreed with Andreas and
told Jerry so when I had breakfast with him one morning. "Ralph, I need to know
something. When I got to Andreas' place the night I moved in, he said he had to
get clean sheets for Aaron's bed. 'Sometimes when it gets to be just too much
and I can't sleep, I sleep in his bed -- it still smells like Aaron. But I made
my bed for you and put clean sheets on Aaron's bed, but I still want to sleep in
it.' Don't you think that is strange?"
"Didn't you have a security
blanket when you were a kid?" I asked him.
"Yeah, but I gave it up before
I went to school."
"You gave it up when your life changed. Andreas life
changed when you moved in, so he gave up the security blanket. You've got to
remember he had just confessed his love to Aaron, and had a real hope it was
being returned, when his world was shattered. Anything he can hold on to is ok."
Jerry nodded agreement.
Graduation sneaked up on me. I had to rush around
to make sure it was videotaped, but I did get arrangements made for that. Lucy
had insisted on having a party for Andreas after graduation. Jerry had asked his
mom and Edward to come down for the event, which pleased Andreas to no end, so
they all showed up for a cook-out at our place.
The graduation program
listed the scholarships accepted by students. That was the first time I had
known Andreas had accepted an academic scholarship to Emory. When I asked him
about it, he said the doctors thought he could play basketball as there was no
permanent damage they could see. "But I looked at my chances of ending up in the
NBA -- frankly, I'm not really interested in basketball and am somewhat
frightened that I might be permanently injured playing. With those feelings I
realized ending up in the NBA was not likely to happen. Besides, what I really
want to do is go into medicine and Emory is the best place for that."
He
had a week between graduation and going to work at the Center for Disease
Control. Edward invited him to come to the mountains for the week saying they
could get in a camping trip and just laze around before both started their
summers. He went and it turned out to be a great week indeed.
When he
came back, he threw himself into his internship at the CDC and Jerry said he
thought he was doing great. "But you know, he tells me sometimes he knows, he
just knows, Aaron is not dead. What do I need to do about
that?"
"Nothing, just let him talk about it."
Several weeks after
Aaron's death, Jerry told me Andreas woke up in the night, the first time for a
while, and said Aaron was in danger. "He went out on the balcony and just sat. I
think he may need help."
"Give him some time," I advised Jerry. Truth be
told, it was kind of spooky.
Aaron
I was having a really
hard time leaving Andreas thinking I was dead, but after the chief had briefed
me on my way down, I realized it had to be that way or he really would be left
behind when I got a bullet in the head.
I was surprised when we did not
drive directly to Macon. Instead, when we reached Forsythe, the chief started
taking back roads until we were in the middle of nowhere. He had turned down a
barely visible trail -- it couldn't be called a road. After we were completely
surrounded by trees and vines, he stopped, we got out and walked about half a
mile further down the trail. There was a beat-up truck in the middle of the
road. "That's your transportation for now," the chief said. "Drive on down this
trail for about a mile and you will find a hunting cabin on the river. That will
be home for the next few days, probably a week. There will be two police
officers waiting for you. They will work with you creating an identity, a story,
and giving you all the information we have. You are not to leave the cabin until
you are ready to become Oscar Carter, your new name.
I found the cabin as
promised and was welcomed by two police officers who looked like anything but.
They were narcotics agents who had been undercover, but now suspected they had
been identified. Their names were Kenyatta and Chandler. "I was named for Joel
Chandler Harris," Chandler said. "Not surprising I get called Uncle Remus," he
laughed.
The first thing they did was have me empty my pockets, putting
everything in a bag which they hid in the attic. "Any of that could get you
killed," Kenyatta said. They took the clothes I'd been wearing and put them in a
garment bag, and it was hidden in the attic as well. I was given jeans and a
shirt to wear. "When you are ready to go into town, we have state-issued
clothing. The story is you are just out of prison on parole. Here are your
papers and your wallet with identification -- everything you need including
about twenty dollars. After that's gone, you will be on your own. All your
things will be sent back to Atlanta as soon as you leave here."
I looked
at my driver's license and discovered I was, indeed, Oscar Carter.
"Let's
have supper and a relaxed evening since it will be the last relaxing time we
have," Chandler said.
Friday morning we were up at eight and had
breakfast, then started working on my identity. I had my "story" down by lunch
but, as the two guys said, only in my rational brain. "You have to get it to the
point it is natural or you'll slip up."
In the afternoon, we started
going over files, trying to see some way to get at the major drug distributor in
Macon. "The facts are few and simple," Kenyatta said. "We know huge amounts of
cocaine are coming into Macon and are picked up and taken to Atlanta, Columbus
and Savannah. We know it comes from Florida. But how it gets from Florida to
here and from here to the three other cities is a mystery. We also suspect that
all the drugs going to Atlanta do not stop there. At least as much as goes to
Columbus is picked up in Atlanta and taken to Chattanooga. Again, we don't know
how. The money flowing into Macon must be going somewhere, but we don't know
where. Finding out is your job."
"I always did like easy assignments," I
smiled.
"Seriously, Oscar, we are stumped and have had no breaks.
Frankly, if you just get out alive it will be a success. To actually break the
case will be a miracle. I am serious, Bro," Kenyatta said.
We broke for
supper and, afterwards, sat around talking. I suddenly realized Chandler had
addressed me as Oscar and I had started responding as such. Supper Friday was
the end of Aaron so far as I was concerned.
Saturday we spent learning
about my "cellmate". He was from Macon and I had learned some things from him.
For fear someone might contact him, he was being moved to a high-security prison
up north and kept in isolation. Absolutely no communication was allowed him.
"Sounds kinda unfair to him," I observed.
"Don't bleed too much for him,"
Kenyatta said. "He's serving three consecutive life sentences. He was asked if
he'd like to be part of an experiment with a private cell as a reward. Since
things are so crowded in Georgia prisons, inmates are sleeping on the floor, he
jumped at the chance."
After an hour of intensive study, we would take a
fifteen-minute break. After the break, I'd be quizzed on what I had been told
since the first session. Generally I did well, but when I made a major boo-boo,
Chandler would remark quietly, "You're dead, Oscar". It made an
impression.
Sunday, a week later, after lunch the two left me on my own
and disappeared in the bedroom. It was half an hour before they came back. I
would not have recognized either of them, they had so altered their appearance.
They handed me a new outfit which included a baseball cap and dark glasses.
"We're going into Macon and, basically, just drive around so you can put things
with names you know. We'll not get out of the truck. I don't think anyone will
be able to identify us, but we don't want to take any chances."
We drove
around Macon for about an hour. The two pointed out places I would need to know,
including a couple places I might get help. I didn't relish putting up at Union
Mission, but I might well have to spend nights there until I could get on my
feet. I'd need a job quickly, but had no idea what I might do. I had to keep my
lack of education, as Oscar, in mind.
Monday and Tuesday continued my
education about Macon. Wednesday I was taken to a back alley in Macon and put on
the street. "You're to report to your parole officer Fridays at ten. He will
arrange to be alone when you show up. Your officer is Jake Halcombe. He's the
supervising officer so he has a private office to protect you. You have the
phone number you can call if you absolutely need help. You don't have it written
down do you?"
"No. All I have on me is my wallet, nothing
else."
Dressed as a newly released prisoner, I waited until the two had
gone before walking out of the alley. I planned to show up at the Union Mission
later, but first I wanted to just walk around Macon, testing my internal map
against reality.
I showed up at the mission in time to be preached to and
prayed over, the cost of a not-too-bad supper. Tickets for the night shelter
were passed out before we went to supper, but I decided the weather was good
enough for me to sleep outside somewhere.
After supper, a youngish man
asked me where I was staying. I told him I was just out of the "state hotel" and
didn't know Macon that well. He invited me to join him in an abandoned building
on the edge of town. There were five or six other people inside. "Dere be only
one other sane person here," he told me. "De other four be dumped on the street
after dere ninety days in Milledgeville. Of course, de first thing dey done is
throw 'way dere medication, so de voices is back. I think dey be harmless, but I
doan have nothin' to do with dem."
I slept with one eye open, but nothing
happened. In the morning, Simon, that was the young guy's name, asked if I'd
like to do some work. "Pay be bad, but no strings." I agreed and we went into a
residential part of Macon -- large old homes with extensive gardens. We went to
a back door where a maid answered the bell. "Fanny Mae," Simon said when she
appeared, "I sho' de madam need some garden work done, an' yo' be havin' two
healthy, good-lookin' brothers to do it". Fanny Mae laughed and said, "Yo'
brothers might be good-looking, but yo' sho' needs a hot scrubbing to get rid of
de dirt an' stink. When yo' goin' get a real job an' be somebody?"
"Next
week for sho' but right now I needs a little pocket change."
"I'll see if
Madam be needin' work done. Where yo' pick up dat good-lookin' dude yo' be
having with yo'?"
"Well, Fanny Mae, dis good brother be called Oscar an'
he be lookin' for work after an extended vacation at de state five-star
hotel."
"What yo' be in of?"
"Drug dealing. But I be
innocent."
"Dat what dey all say," she answered.
Remembering to
keep the dialect was harder than I thought. I had worked so hard for years
getting rid of it that using it just felt wrong. Since I said I wasn't from
Macon a slip now and then might be expected, but no major ones.
Fanny Mae
disappeared and came back shortly. "Yo' be in luck. Madam say her gardener done
gone an' slipped under de lawn mower an' ain't gonna be back fo' weeks. Here de
list of what she be wantin' done an' here de key for de tool shed."
The
first item on the list was mowing and edging the lawn. Simon got on the riding
mower and started. I took a weed-eater and started trimming up the lawn. Simon
finished before I did and started edging. At noon, Fanny Mae brought up plates
piled high, and iced tea. We sat in the shade of a huge oak and ate. After we
finished, Simon took the plates back and we lay under the tree resting. I needed
it.
"Know where I might land a regular job?" I asked. "Know it ain't
gonna be easy after my vacation, but I doan take well to street
life."
"Doan neither. I got put on de street by my mama after she caught
me doin' weed. Jest been on de street fo' a few days, but knowed most of de
street dudes from ditchin' school. I be workin' in de gardens in dis
neighborhood since I big enough. Jest luck old Washington cut he's foot. Lookin'
like a job jest waitin' to be had. Yo' know, I gonna introduce you around and
maybe de two of us can have a summer job jest workin' gardens."
I didn't
know how much investigating I could get done working with Simon, but right now I
needed money. Simon was right: the pay was bad, but better than I expected and
there was no tax as it was all under the table. By the middle of the next week,
we had lined up five places and went on a regular schedule, a house a day. Any
extra meant extra money. We also did pickup jobs on Saturday. By the end of the
second week, I was surprised at how much I had to tell Jake. Never think your
servants don't know all there is to know about you. I saw the dynamic often.
Madam or Mister talked as though the servant was a piece of furniture.
My
second Sunday in Macon, Simon had gone home and asked to come back. His mama had
let him come back home and recommended I take a room with Miss Janie, an ancient
black retired school teacher and matriarch of the black community.
I went
around to Miss Janie's place and asked if she had a room I could rent. She
grilled me up one side and down another. Finally she said, "You may be on parole
from the state of Georgia, but you're on probation with me. One tiny slip and
you are out of here. Understand?" I nodded. "And I need your first four weeks
rent. In advance, now." I had the money and the rent on the room was practically
nothing, particularly when she told me it included breakfast and supper. I was
at her place only a few days when I realized she took in boarders for company
more than the money and was treating me like a nephew.
I made it through
the week ok, thinking of Andreas only a few minutes at the time. I was busy,
working hard at my jobs and trying to find out something about the drug scene in
Macon. So far all I had learned was that weed was plentiful, but that was not my
concern. Sundays were another matter. I slept late and then had the whole day to
think about Andreas. After one particularly painful Sunday morning, I told Miss
Janie I was going down to the river. "Don't go without a fishing pole," she
said, went in the house and returned with one. "You can dig worms at the edge of
the garden in the mound of dirt, I feed 'em there," she said. I did as she said
and had a can of worms quickly.
I walked up the river a ways, to where
the path along the river just petered out, sat under a large willow and started
fishing and thinking about Andreas. I wondered what he was doing, how he was
doing, if he still missed me, that sort of thing. I had pushed his confession of
love for me in the very back of my mind, but here on a lazy Sunday afternoon
with no sound except the river flowing by, it came back with a rush. I wondered
if I had taken the assignment to avoid facing my feeling for Andreas and the
fact that I might be -- was -- gay. I thought about that and the beating Andreas
had received because his mom found out he was gay. Most communities are
homophobic, and even the most accepting has its share of bigots, but the black
community takes homophobia to new heights. It always puzzled me how blacks who
were out-and-out racist, hating whites, could align themselves with skinheads
and other white racists, when it came to homophobia. I guess that was why I had
very carefully avoided coming to terms with my sexuality.
My high school
girlfriend had been a good cover, and she was a cover I saw now. We seldom had
sex and it was good... no, it wasn't good. If I was really honest, she didn't
turn me on that much. By the time that would have become a real problem, her
mind was on crack, not me. I was sure dumb. She had been on crack for a good
long while before I found out. I tried to get her to get help, but she overdosed
instead.
Anyway, here I was alone, with nothing to do but sort out my
feelings. I thought back over my time with Andreas. Every minute seemed vivid
and crystal clear and standing outside it, it became equally clear that I loved
the guy, not as a younger brother or friend, although I definitely had those
feelings as well, but as one gay man loves another. Yeah, I was gay and admitted
it, and I was in love and admitted that. When I realized how I think I would
have felt had I thought he was dead, I started crying, huge tears running down
my face. I decided then and there to get busy and see if I couldn't get back to
him soon -- before he found someone else.
It was a good thing I had
reached a conclusion about myself, because suddenly the fish started biting and
I had a good string when I walked back to Miss Janie's. She was thrilled with
the fish. I had no idea what to do with them, but she showed me how to gut and
filet them in a few smooth motions. I couldn't do as well as she did, but we did
have fish ready for the frying pan and we both enjoyed the results of my fishing
trip -- I doubly so because I had come to grips with who I was.
After
supper each evening, I sat with Miss Janie on her front porch as she commented
on the passing traffic. She was a gold mine of information. My big break came
the Sunday evening of my fishing trip. A big, black Cadillac came down the
street slowly and Miss Janie said, "Yeah, drive slow and show off, now that
you're respectable". After the car passed, I asked Miss Janie who it
was.
"That was Sister Rose. She was a small-time dope dealer, just weed,
then suddenly she got religion and, before you could say 'Amen', she was
building her Cathedral of Tomorrow. Millions she's poured into it, millions I
don't know where she gets. She draws a big crowd, that's for sure, what with
three-four gospel choirs, each with its own orchestra of ten-fifteen people.
Each choir has its own big bus and tours all over the place."
"They make
tours?"
"Yes, one or more on tour every weekend. Leave Friday and back
Sunday night for the big show at her place. Until a few months ago, she was
holding forth in a warehouse she rented, but the grand opening of the Cathedral
of Tomorrow -- which will seat over two thousand -- was three-four months
ago."
"Who's behind her? Surely she didn't start out with piles of
money."
"I'm not sure who all, but I do hear she's connected with that
black undertaker. Funerals have gotten bigger and bigger, but the prices
undercut the white establishments. When somebody dies, the family gets flowers
from the Cathedral of Tomorrow with a letter and booklet, which says something
about sympathy and an offer of their facilities. I understand the new building
has a 'Slumber Room' for funerals. That big-shot lawyer Jason Stanley Story is
also all mixed up in the whole thing. I don't know how they are all connected,
but they are. That black undertaker even sends all bodies to be funeralized to
Atlanta to be fixed up. Says they do a better job." Suddenly wheels started
spinning in my head. Maybe Miss Janie was on to something without realizing
it.
"How'd you like to check out this Cathedral of Tomorrow tonight. We'd
at least hear some good gospel singing."
"We got time? I'll have to
change."
"Sure. I suspect we could come and go just about any
time."
I'll say one thing for Sister Rose: she sure knew how to put on a
show. She was dressed in a long, slinky gold dress, parading in front of a
gospel choir dressed in red. She was the star and she knew it. The choir was
good, very good, and I could see why they could tour as much as they wanted.
Miss Janie and I stayed for an hour and the show was still going when we left.
As we left, I picked up three or four brochures from a tract rack in the
entrance hall -- and it was an entrance hall. It was as large as many churches,
three stories high, with a chandelier at least fifty feet across. Great sweeping
stairs led up to the two balconies and three sets of massive bronze doors opened
onto the main floor. All in all, it was a cross between an opera house and a
high-priced whorehouse. Yes, Sister Rose had money coming from
somewhere.
When I got back to my room, I looked at the brochures. There
was one listing the governing body and I noticed that Jason Stanley Story was
listed as attorney, treasurer and vice president. Sister Rose was president and
executive officer. Willie Brown was secretary and chairman of arrangements. That
was it. There were no other officials. I soon learned who Willie Brown was,
because one of the brochures was "The Cathedrals of Tomorrow and the Bereaved."
He was "that black undertaker" Miss Janie had talked about. A third brochure
listed the activities for the week. There were the usual services, Bible study
-- all you would expect in a going church -- but the choir schedule caught my
attention. There were four gospel choirs. One would be at the Cathedral for
Wednesday but would be on tour to Savannah over the weekend. One would be
present for Sunday morning services, one had a week for relaxation and one would
be touring to Columbus. There were two funerals scheduled, one Thursday and one
Friday.
I lay back on the bed, an idea forming in my mind. I didn't get
far before Andreas took over my thoughts. I wanted so much to tell him to wait
for me, because I really loved that man. I drifted off to sleep and dreamed of
Andreas, not a nightmare as so many of my dreams had been since I came to Macon,
but a beautiful dream of making sweet love to Andreas who was, truly, the man of
my dreams.
I was careful, but I asked a lot of questions about Sister
Rose and the Cathedral of Tomorrow during the week. I found nothing to either
confirm or deny the idea I was working on in my head. Friday, when I made my
report to Jake, I asked if it was possible to get an audit of the books of the
funeral home, Jason Stanley Story and the Cathedral of Tomorrow. "Also you need
to be ready to audit the tax returns of Story, Sister Rose and the undertaker,"
I told him.
"I'm sure we can get an audit done without arousing
suspicion, especially the businesses. What do you expect to find?"
"I'm
not sure, but there's an awful lot of money being made off of drugs I've been
told, and no-one knows what happens to it. I just wonder if it's not being
laundered by the church. Something's fishy there. Too much money too
quick."
I also asked him if he could get me price lists from the other
three funeral homes in Macon. "That should be an easy one," he said.
I
decided to go back to the church Sunday night. I picked up the weekly activities
brochure. There were no funerals scheduled, but three of the choirs were
touring, again to Columbus, and Savannah and this week one was going to Atlanta.
I picked up another activity sheet entitled "Cathedral Partners". It reported
that three churches had joined with the cathedral ministries -- one each in
Columbus, Savannah and Atlanta. "Our gospel choirs will be supplying music at
these new Cathedrals of Tomorrow. The gospel choirs can always use new voices to
help spread our ministry," the sheet said. It seemed strange to me that the
three cities couldn't come up with gospel choirs of their own.
I decided
to check out the Ebony Funeral Home's business. They offered a "pre-need" policy
and I went after work Wednesday to discuss a pre-need plan. I went for two
plans, one the absolute maximum and the other second best. I guess I should have
known, but I was thunderstruck by the cost of dying, especially if you wanted to
go first class.
I took my "pre-need" plan with me when I went to see
Jake. "Turned out, even given the federal regulations requiring funeral homes to
provide price lists, it wasn't as easy as I thought," Jake said as he spread the
price lists on his desk. "There's something rotten in Denmark," he said as he
compared Ebony's prices to the others. "Someone is making a killing, no pun
intended, or someone is going broke. Look at this. On comparable items, Ebony is
200% below the others." He picked up his phone and told his secretary to get a
casket company on the phone. When she rang him, he got passed from person to
person until he was angry. "Look, I need to know the cost to an undertaker for
three models of your caskets. It is part of a criminal investigation. Now you
can either give me the prices or prepare for warrants for an audit and search...
I thought I was being reasonable. Just give me the three numbers... Thanks.
Well, it seems both statements are true, someone is making a killing and someone
is losing money. Ebony is selling caskets at cost. There is no way they can be
making money. I will be interested in what an audit shows up."
I went to
a Wednesday night service and had a brainstorm. I had a decent voice, so I
volunteered for a gospel choir. Seems you get fitted for a robe and ready for
the bus by Friday night. The choir I was in was scheduled to go to Savannah,
where it was highly unlikely anyone would know me.
I had been in Macon
six weeks, as long as I was told I would be and was still not finished. I wanted
to see Andreas and make sure he was ok at least. At best, I'd like him to kiss
me as he did prom night -- and then some.
Friday night I got to the
cathedral early and did a little snooping around. The choir buses -- luxury
models and more -- were out back being loaded. I was surprised when they came
around front for the choir to load because the baggage area on the opposite side
of the buses was being loaded. The orchestra's instruments were loaded, then the
choir's things. We had all been given identical garment bags and suitcases for
our choir robes and clothes and the luggage compartment wouldn't hold them all.
I expected to be told to take my things to the other side of the bus, but that
didn't happen. They went on top of the bus.
Once we were in Savannah, the
buses went to the motel where we were all staying, two to a room. Our belongings
were unloaded and the buses left. I heard the drivers talking about getting
together at a bar as soon as, "we get the stuff unloaded". The church was
several blocks from the motel and I wanted to see if I could find out what "the
stuff" was. I walked around to the side of the motel and got a taxi in a few
minutes and gave him the address of the church. I got out, paid the driver and
walked down an alley leading to the street behind the church. I was in time to
see the last bags, identical to our suitcases, being unloaded from the side of
the bus not used and taken into the church. I decided I had all the information
I needed except for one more thing. I decided to contact Jake as soon as I got
back to Macon.
We rolled into Macon late Sunday night, and I went
straight to Miss Janie's and hit the sack. I lay there thinking about what I had
concluded, and decided I'd wait a little longer to see if I could find the last
piece of the puzzle. I had a real nightmare and even woke up Miss Janie. I
dreamed I was in a casket, unable to move, and Andreas was standing over me
crying. Miss Janie fixed me a "little toot", good Tennessee sour mash with lemon
and a splash of water. "I keep this for medicinal purposes," she said. "Better
than any sleeping pill, at least more enjoyable." She sat on the edge of the
bed, holding my hand and singing a lullaby. The combination
worked.
Monday, I found a phone booth near where we were working and
called Jake. "Jake, be ready to move," I said. "I think I've got it figured out.
Check something for me. Find out where the casket company has factories. I'll be
in touch."
Monday night I told Miss Janie I was going for a long walk to
clear my head so I'd sleep. I hadn't been around the funeral home, so I thought
I'd check it out. I don't know what I expected to find, and really saw nothing
unusual except there was a tractor-trailer rig parked at the back of the main
building behind a high hedge. The truck and trailer both had Ebony Funeral Home,
Macon, Georgia on them. Why would a funeral home need a tractor-trailer rig? I
had a hunch, but that was all.
Tuesday I had a hard time getting away
from Simon. He had been to a big party Saturday and was still carrying on about
it. It was after work when I finally got to a public phone and called Jake at
home. "What did you find out?" I asked.
"Ebony buys from two companies,
remember? Both have plants in the southeast as you might expect. One has them in
Tennessee, Alabama and Florida. The other has plants in Georgia and Florida.
Anything else I can do for you?"
"Yeah. Don't know how you can do it, but
I need to know where the caskets Ebony uses comes from."
"I'll see what I
can do," he replied.
When I got back, Miss Janie was sitting on the
porch. It was still hot and her house was not air-conditioned. I pulled up a
rocker and sat beside her. "Miss Janie, thanks for Sunday night. I really had a
nightmare and a half."
"Surprised you haven't had more after being in
prison. Is prison as bad as people say?"
"Worse. It's hard to talk about.
There are all sorts of bad things going on, but not being able to go and come as
you please is punishment enough. 'Course, it wouldn't be as bad except every con
looks out for himself and has no care for anybody else. Yeah, it was really
bad."
We rocked in silence for a while, then she said, "Oscar, for some
reason I just can't see you in prison. No sir, you just don't act like a former
con. Don't know why but, somehow or other, it just don't fit."
I made no
response, but took that as a warning. I had been around her and Simon long
enough to relax a little, a little too much, I suspected. I had better watch
it.
I had a real stroke of luck Wednesday. One of our regulars had asked
Simon if he could do some work for a friend of hers. "After hours, of course."
Simon agreed and we went to her place, after we finished our regular work, and
worked until it was almost dark. It was only slightly out of my way, so I went
by Ebony. I saw the tractor-trailer pulled up to the back of the funeral home
and caskets being unloaded. I kept moving closer, trying to see what was going
on. I accidentally kicked a soda can, making a loud noise. The guys unloading
the trailer dropped the casket they were carrying and started running toward me.
One of them definitely had a gun out. I quickly hid in some bushes. I was hoping
they would just look around and go back to work, but there was another noise
right beside me. The fellow with the gun shot, hitting me in the shoulder. I was
prepared for him to find me and finish his job, but I was saved by a huge orange
tomcat. He had made the noise and when the guy shot, the cat let out a yowl and
headed straight for for him. He took a couple shots at the cat as it ran away.
"You be shootin' a mutherfuckin' cat, shithead." The four guys picked up the
casket and started carrying it into the funeral home.
As soon as they
were inside, I got up and started running. At the next block, I hid in some
bushes to see if I could stop the bleeding from my wound. I was losing a lot of
blood and I knew it. I was six or seven blocks from Miss Janie's, an easy walk
under ordinary circumstances, but I could feel myself growing weaker. I tore
strips from my T shirt and took the rest of it and made a compress. I couldn't
do much with just my right hand, but I did get the strips tied, I hoped tight
enough to stop the bleeding.
I didn't want to be found walking down the
street, so I cut across backyards. As I cut across one, I realized I had made a
mistake as a huge dog started barking. Fortunately he was tied up, but he did
alarm the neighborhood. I finally realized I was going to pass out soon if I
didn't get help. I decided I'd take a chance and take the most direct route to
Miss Janie's. I was only a block away when I started having little blackouts.
When I did, I'd wake up lying in the street. I started thinking about Andreas.
"Man, if you don't get moving, you'll never make it and he'll never know. You'll
never get that kiss you want so bad. Andreas, I need you, man. I need your
help." I was going on blind will when I turned into the gate of Miss Janie's. I
collapsed, not knowing whether I had made it or not.
When I came to, I
was in a hospital bed. I could see a maze of wires and tubes, but little else.
"You ok, Oscar?" It was Miss Janie's voice.
"I think so. I mean I'm not
ok, but better than I expected."
"I didn't know what to do other than
call the EMS. You walked up on the porch and promptly fell down. Son, you came
very close to meeting your Maker. The police are outside, waiting to question
you when you are conscious."
"Miss Janie, this is very important. I can't
speak to them yet. I want you to call someone for me." I gave her Jake's home
phone number. "Ask for Jake and tell him what happened. Tell him he needs to get
here at once and to be ready to jump. Can you do that for me?"
"Sure.
I'll tell the policeman you are still out."
"Ask the nurse to talk to
Jake. He can tell her how to handle the police. But we are running out of time.
Thanks a million, Miss Janie."
"You gonna tell me what this is all
about?"
"You will be among the first to know."
Miss Janie left and
I closed my eyes. Jake had to get here before the police started poking
around.
The nurse came in shortly after Miss Janie had left. "I talked
with Jake and you'll not be bothered by the officer outside."
"How am I
doing?"
"You had a close call, but the wound was clean and damaged
nothing serious. Once we got some blood in you, you started coming around. I'll
send Miss Janie back in if you like."
"Please do."
Miss Janie came
back into the room and took a seat by the bed. I closed my eyes and I guess
dozed off because the next thing I knew, Jake and the Chief of Police came into
the room. "You didn't have to get yourself wounded," Jake said. "But it is a
good undercover trick."
"Yeah, good planning," I answered.
"Ok,
we've got the troops ready. What do we do?"
"Do you have search warrants
for the church and funeral home?"
"Sure do."
"I don't know where
things are hidden, but I am positive I know how the whole system works. Seeing
the truck being unloaded tonight should mean you are going to find all the
evidence you need."
"The Cathedral of Tomorrow handles most of the
transportation of the drugs. They purchase caskets directly from the
manufacturer in Florida. That was the missing link. There are closer casket
manufacturers, but Ebony goes to Florida. Ask yourself why. How many law
enforcement officers are going to stop and search a truck loaded with caskets?
Once they got the drugs here, they used a couple ways of shipping them to
Atlanta, Savannah and Columbus. The choirs are a perfect cover. The luggage
compartment on one side of the bus is loaded with drugs in suitcases identical
to those provided to choir members. Should the bus be stopped and searched, the
driver opens the side with luggage. If any of the suitcases are opened, they
contain what is expected. If the second side is opened, who is going to open the
suitcases identical to those just checked?"
"Atlanta could handle more
drugs than Savannah or Columbus so more than the choir bus is often needed.
That's the reason Ebony started sending bodies to Atlanta. An unmarked van took
the bodies to an Atlanta embalming concern. A hearse followed with a shipping
casket, but it was filled with drugs. Again, who's going to stop a hearse? After
the body was embalmed, it was placed in the hearse and returned to Macon. It was
a clever scheme. What really cinched it for me were those bargain basement
prices for an uptown funeral."
"And Chattanooga?" the chief
asked.
"An eighteen wheeler can transport an awful lot of dope. And there
is a casket company there. Bet that's another place where caskets get
purchased."
"Good job, Aaron, very good job. At this very moment the
church and the funeral home are being searched. Sister Rose, Jason Stanley Story
and Willie Brown, along with drivers of the buses and the tractor-trailer
driver, have all been picked up and are in jail. Now all you have to do is just
take care of yourself. We'll come back when the fun is over."
As soon as
the two had gone, Miss Janie said, "I told you you didn't act like a convict.
Now you want to tell Miss Janie what this is all about."
I told Miss
Janie the whole story, but I didn't mention Andreas. I knew Miss Janie well
enough to know she would not be sympathetic.
The chief came by Thursday
and told me the superintendent was coming down Friday morning. That afternoon,
the doctor told me I could go back to Atlanta Friday if I would get my wound
checked out, "at Grady where they know about gunshot wounds," if I wanted to.
They were not breaking the story until Friday since there was just too much
evidence to be taken care of.
Friday morning the chief and superintendent
came in the room. "Damn good job, Aaron," the superintendent said, "damn good
job".
"Yeah, we are still discovering things. Late last night we got a
blueprint of the Cathedral of Tomorrow and found a bunker-type room in the
basement stacked full of cocaine. There was a safe in the room as well. Aaron,
there was four million, that's f-o-u-r, four million, in bills in it. Too bad
you aren't a private citizen. If you weren't working as a police officer, you'd
stand to get 10% of the money and all other assets. A cool four hundred thousand
for starters," the chief said with a smile.
"Whoa," the superintendent
said. "All this was done by Aaron under an assumed name, but that was not the
extent of the identity switch. We got worried and actually had Aaron declared
dead. In order to give his ward money, I gave him money out of my discretionary
fund, not from Aaron's salary or insurance. It's funny, but legally Aaron was
functioning as a private citizen. He got no money from my department or yours.
He worked for a living. I think you could save us all a lot of time and effort
by just giving Aaron the reward."
"You are one clever devil,
Superintendent. Lucky this is a small town and can work things out without a
whole lot of red tape. I'll get a judge to rule on this as quickly as
possible."
"Chief, I didn't expect anything except my salary, but I'll
take whatever comes my way. If there is enough, Miss Janie's house is to be
insulated, a new furnace and air conditioning installed."
"I'll see that
is done," the chief said.
"Also, set up a fund to pay Simon to go back to
school. He's to get a couple hundred a week, so long as he is in school and
passing."
"I'll take care of that as well," the chief said.
"Then
I am out of here!"
I had thought about calling Andreas, but that was more
shock than he needed. The superintendent told me he had called Ralph about the
wrap-up of the Macon drug business. "He said Jerry had the weekend off and he
and Andreas were going to north Georgia. He thought they were planning on going
camping."
I didn't know the best way to approach Andreas. I did know one
thing: I loved him, no question about that, absolutely no question.
I was
surprised how beat I was when we got back to Atlanta. The superintendent took me
by Grady to get my wound checked out. It was doing fine, but I was given some
more pain pills since I was in considerable pain.
Ralph was waiting for
me at the apartment. He gave me a big hug, poured me a beer. I had to decide
whether to have a beer or a pain pill. The beer won hands down. "I guess you
need to be brought up to date since you have been gone six weeks" -- remember
the Macon business would take only a few weeks. He told me Jerry had been living
with Andreas. "I was really glad he moved in. Andreas was talking suicide for a
while. I thought Andreas was falling for Edward and worried about how he and you
would handle that when you came back, but I was definitely off base. Edward has
been a strong arm for him to lean on, but that's it." Ralph talked a while
longer then, asked, "What are you going to do?".
"I don't know. I know
what I'd like to do. I'd like to go straight to north Georgia and make mad,
passionate love to that beautiful man."
"How about me calling Jerry -- he
gave me his cell phone number -- and telling him to hold off going camping, and
you go up and get resurrected at the Coghills? Think anything else would be too
traumatic for the whole bunch."
"You do the calling, I'm on my way --
that is if I have transportation." The Jeep was in my slot, and in minutes I had
thrown things in a bag and was on my way to be united with my love.
I
felt as if I was driving in cold molasses. I finally set my cruise control
because without it, my speed crept up until I was speeding big time. I left
Atlanta at 5:00 and walked into the Coghills at 7:30, really good time in light
of my leaving at rush hour on Friday. When I walked in, the Coghills were all
sitting on the deck. I learned later Ralph had called and said they needed to be
together at 7:00-7:30 to share in an important event. They all had their backs
to me except Edward, who was leaning against the banister of the deck. I put my
finger to my lips as he started to speak. He didn't speak, but the smile on his
face was a dead give-away something was up. I stood still and said softly,
"Andreas Jackson, I love you, man, I love you".
Andreas stood slowly and
then turned to face me. His mouth fell open and he turned pale and his knees
started buckling. In two steps I had my arms around him. He had fainted. I eased
him into a chair, put his head between his knees and started bathing his face
with a cold cloth Edward brought me. Gradually Andreas came around. When he did,
he said nothing. His hands started tracking my features. I took his hands into
mine and kissed his palms. Finally he whispered, "Aaron, is this real? Are you
really here? Alive? God, tell me I'm not dreaming again. Please, tell me you are
real!"
I lifted Andreas to his feet and answered with a smile as I said,
"Andreas, there is no-one in the world more real, more alive, than I am right
now". My arms were around him as I raised my face to his and pressed my lips to
his in a passionate kiss. Suddenly he was devouring me with kisses. He put his
arms around me and hugged me tight. I couldn't help crying out in pain and, when
I did, he released me, looked at my bandaged shoulder and said, "I'm sorry,
Aaron".
"Don't be, it means this is not a dream." Edward brought me a
chair and I sat down and Andreas sat in my lap, his arms around me. He kept
kissing me and I kept reassuring him that I was real.
He finally just sat
on my lap and with that shy smile of his said, "Aaron, you have a lot of
explaining to do."
"Yeah, I sure do."
"Jerry, why didn't you tell
me Aaron was alive. You must have known."
"No, he didn't know, Andreas.
Only Ralph and the Superintendent of Detectives in Atlanta and the Chief of
Police in Macon knew."
Mrs. Coghill brought me a cup of coffee and asked
if I had eaten. I told her I hadn't. "I wanted only one thing, that's to be
where I am with who I'm with."
"You wanted to be with at least one of
us," she laughed. "Your story can wait until you have eaten."
When I
finished the food, she brought me another cup of coffee and I told everyone the
whole story.
"I know it has been hard on everyone who cared anything
about me but, in the end, I know that it was best. Had I ever been identified, I
would be a dead man sure enough."
After a lot of questions, I was just
about talked out. "That's it. I may be coming into money because technically I
was a private citizen in Macon, then again I may not. If I don't, I guess I'll
get back pay at least. But that's not important right now."
"Aaron, the
tent is all set up and everything, ready for overnight camping. If you hurry,
you can make it to the camp site while there is enough light. I think Edward and
I will spend the night here and leave the camp to you and Andreas," Jerry
said.
"What are we waiting for?" I asked Andreas.
Andreas hopped
off my lap, grabbed my hand and we went down the stairs from the deck. We walked
along the stream until it joined the trail to the cliffs above the river. I
doubted we would reach the tent before it was pitch-black dark unless I could
get Andreas under control as our progress was slowed as, again and again, he
stopped us for a passionate kiss. After one passionate, tongue-in-the-mouth,
kiss I said, "You keep that up and we'll never reach the camp
site."
Andreas laughed, a laugh that made me catch my breath, and said,
"I haven't noticed you resisting!" He gave me another quick kiss and,
hand-in-hand, we walked up the increasingly steep trail, finally reaching the
camp site.
The tent was set well back from the cliff edge. A fire had
been laid in a fire pit in front of the tent, waiting to be started. Andreas put
a match to the tinder and soon there was a small, glowing fire, its flames
making our shadows dance around the camp.
Andreas took a sleeping bag
from the tent, folded it and spread it by the fire and motioned for me to sit
down. When I did, he straddled my legs, his butt on the sleeping bag, his legs
around my waist.
"Andreas, I know I can never make up for the pain you
suffered believing I was dead. I thought about that a long time before I took
the assignment. I'll confess that if I had known what I now know about myself
and my love for you, I don't think I could have done it. I guess I can say that
in the time I was gone, I accomplished what I hoped to accomplish with my whole
life. I have to think that way, believing I saved an awful lot of people from
dying of drugs."
"But, right now, what is more important is the time I
was away from you I learned something, accepted something. I'm still not sure
whether I am gay or not... that's not true, I am very sure at least part of me,
a major part, is gay. But that really doesn't matter. What really matters is
that gay or straight, I love you more than life itself. I don't know what the
future holds, but I do know if it doesn't hold you, us together, then I just as
well should have stayed dead."
Andreas was silent for what seemed a very
long time, his head resting on my shoulder. "Aaron, I told Ralph I had nothing
to live for when I was told you were dead. I meant that. I don't think I would
have done myself in, but I think I would have been a walking dead man. I think
the only thing that kept me going was remembering that prom night kiss. I guess
I saw in it a lot more than you ever admitted."
"Andreas, you felt like
you were made to be held in my arms when we danced. Our kiss felt exactly right.
I never doubted that."
"I have, recently, thought I needed to see someone
because the longer you were away, the more I believed you weren't dead, the
exact opposite of what I thought I should be thinking. One Sunday afternoon I
was sitting on the balcony, half asleep, when as clear as anything, I heard your
voice say, "Andreas, I never told you I loved you, so I am telling you
now."
"Andreas Jackson, I love you with every breath I take. I am
breathing because of you. I didn't tell anyone because they would come up with
why it wasn't real, but I knew it was real."
"Then, two nights ago, I
knew you were in trouble. I was panicking. Jerry didn't know what to do. I mean
he would wake me up when I had a nightmare, but I was wide awake and panicking.
Finally I went out on the balcony and tried to give you my strength, then
suddenly I knew everything was ok with you."
"Andreas, I knew I was dying
from loss of blood and I really needed help then, suddenly, I had the willpower
to go on, blindly and finally unconsciously. There is no question in my mind you
saved my life."
Andreas laughed, kissed me and said, "Old African custom,
Aaron, I saved your life now you belong to me!"
"Yassa, sir Massa, what
you want this black boy to do?"
"You don't be no black boy, yo' my man!"
Andreas laughed and leaned forward to kiss me. Playfully, I started leaning away
from him. I finally fell over backwards, Andreas was immediately on top of me.
"I got you where I want you," he said, "You are under my power!".
"Well,
at least I am under you."
"Now I'm going to have my way with you!"
Andreas started kissing me, long, deep, hard. Then he started grinding his hips
into mine, pressing our hard cocks between us. I reached up and slipped his
shirt over his head. He unbuttoned my shirt and, when my chest was exposed,
suddenly stopped playing. He was staring at the bandage on my shoulder. Huge
tears formed in his eyes and then he started crying in earnest, crying in great
body-shaking sobs.
I was confused. "Andreas, Babe, what's
wrong?"
He didn't answer. He couldn't answer he was crying so hard, his
face buried in my chest, his hands clutching my shirt. I didn't know what to do
other than what I was doing, holding Andreas tight and saying over and over,
"Andreas, it's all right, everything's all right. It's all right,
babe."
It seemed hours before Andreas regained control of himself, but I
suspect it was just a few minutes. When he did, he started kissing me madly,
wildly, my mouth, my eyes, my neck, my chest. When he kissed a nipple I felt as
though an electric charge shot through my body.
Andreas eventually calmed
down enough for me to ask again, "Andreas, Babe, what's wrong?".
"Aaron,
so many, many times I have dreamed you were alive, holding me in your arms, that
I was kinda holding my breath, hoping the dream would last. Then, when I saw
your shoulder, I finally, completely, really knew you were alive and here and
real and... and..." Andreas was talking so fast he finally just ran out of
words. "Aaron, Aaron, you are real and alive and I'm with you and you said you
loved me and you kissed me and... and..." He again ran out of words and I was
laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes.
I was laughing at my Andreas, MY
Andreas, because I was so happy: I loved him and he loved me and, yes, because I
was alive and here and real.
Andreas was all out of breath and just lay
his head on my chest, his arms beside me. "I know you are alive and real, Aaron,
because I hear your heart."
"So you hear it calling your name?" I asked,
"Because it is, it is calling the name of the man I love."
"It's saying
Aa-ron An-dreas over and over."
He lay still, listening to my heart call
our names and then raised his head, smiled his double-dimple smile and raised up
and kissed my chin. "I think I started a job I didn't finish," he said as he
rolled off my body and said, "Raise up". I did, and he removed my shirt, put his
arms around me and kissed me on the mouth, then my eyes, my neck and, again, a
nipple.
"You know, you know more about what comes next..."
"We
both do!" Andreas giggled. "We both do!"
I was glad the fire had burned
low, otherwise Andreas would have seen me blush. At least I thought I was safe
until he laughed, "Aaron Johnson, you big bad policeman! You're
blushing!"
From the way my face felt, I suspect he could have seen me
blush in the pitch-black dark. I was finally able to say, "You're the one with
all the magazines, so I guess you're the expert".
"You're the one with
experience," he laughed and started tickling my ribs.
"Well, Mr.
Know-it-all, in the first place she didn't turn me on the way you do and, in
case you hadn't seen those OTHER magazines, she was put together
differently."
"Hey, and Vive la diference,
right?"
"RIGHT!"
"I happen to know you saw me naked as a jaybird
the first time we were here."
"I didn't!"
"Oh, yes you did! You
gotta know bedrooms are like eighteen wheelers, 'If you can see my mirrors, I
can see you!' I saw you sneaking a peek. Why did you think it took me so long to
crawl into a pair of boxers? It took just long enough to show you what you had
won -- and to get you good and hard!"
"You don't play fair,
Andreas."
"ALL'S fair in love and war, and this is both -- I love you and
I'm going to fight to get your clothes off!"
"No need, I
surrender."
Andreas reached out for my left hand, but I pulled it back
and offered my right one. He pulled me to my feet and wrapped his arms around
me, taking care not to hurt the shoulder. While his lips, mouth and tongue kept
me occupied, his hands worked on my jeans and soon they slid down my legs. As I
stepped out of them, his thumbs in the waistband of my briefs released my hard,
precum-streaming cock.
I wasn't quite as smooth in undressing my
chocolate man. My left hand and arm were hampered by a bullet wound, but that
was ok. That wound convinced Andreas I was alive and real and reminded me that,
somehow or other, he was responsible for that, for my not taking advantage of my
"pre-need plan" at Ebony Funeral Home.
Andreas placed his hands on my
shoulders -- it was one of those times when it was easy to see why he was a
basketball star as he stood four inches above my six-foot body, touching me with
long beautiful fingers, hands and fingers which made mine look tiny. We stood,
drinking in each other's body, both at full attention, ready for action. As I
looked into his face, the moonlight caught the scar on his left cheek. It was
not pretty, not sexy, it was a sign of what it had cost him to come to this
moment. I owed him for that and for the pain he had suffered while I was gone.
"But," I thought, "you have a lifetime to repay him."
Andreas kissed me,
softly, gently, picked me up and laid me on the sleeping bag by the fire. We
were both amateurs, but we did make love and it was perfect. After we were
exhausted by it, we lay, facing each other, arms resting on our lover. "We are
definitely amateurs at this," I smiled at Andreas.
"Yeah, but it ain't
basketball, Bro. In this game, it's the practice I'm going to
enjoy."
North Georgia nights can get pretty cool, even in the summer. I
woke up in the night, cold. Andreas must have been as well, as he was as close
to me as possible. I looked at him in the dim light of the moon and wondered
what I had done in some other life to have this man love me. I kissed his cheek
softly and covered the two of us.
The sunrise was spectacular, almost as
spectacular as the feeling I had when Andreas and I greeted it by making
love.
"Aaron, it's beautiful," Andreas said. "And it's special because it
is our -- ours together -- first sunrise, a new day, a new life." I could only
agree.
THE END